I thought it would best for us and the mission if we took a break.
Look, if this is about last night, I’m sorry. I was upset.
At the mention of last night’s events, Ben looked down at his feet on the patio stone and avoided eye contact, eventually looking out at the crashing waves.
Ben…
No, Darcy. Just stop.
His voice was taut as he returned his intense stare back to me, his jawline clenched in raw emotion. I was taken aback by his abrupt interruption, remaining silent and waiting for an explanation.
Look, I know this is hard. I understand more than anyone else on the planet. But if you’re quitting, then I don’t know how I’m going to do this.
Ben, I’m not quitting. We lost a friend last night. It was our fault. I’m sorry if I got overwhelmed.
Don’t you see? Noah, Sam, they won’t be the last people who get hurt or killed in this fight. And I need to know you can keep your head if something else happens.
I stood with my mouth hanging open, unable to find words under the intense gaze of Ben. His eyes were darker than I had ever seen before.
Darcy, I’m not trying to be hard on you. But you don’t have to tell me it was our fault Sam died last night. I know that. I’m very aware of how many people have lost their lives because of the Society my parents created. Just because I don’t show it, doesn’t mean I don’t feel it.
I know you’re not emotionless.
No, but I see how you look at me, like I’m the glue holding everything together. But I… I don’t know if I can be that for you.
His confession weighed heavily in the air and on my heart. I hadn’t realized the burden I placed on him to be the reason and stability in the mission and in our lives. As the doubt he had in himself was made evident, I couldn’t help but think of how exhausting it must have been for him to be the one who was always calm, always thinking through every action, always keeping everyone safe.
Oh, Ben, I am so sorry. I didn’t realize the weight you were carrying.
His eyes were no longer intense, but wide open to his every emotion, every burden placed on him since he was a young boy. He turned and sat down in the chair closest to him, running his hands over his face and through his hair. A slight shadow had appeared on his jawline from the days he’d gone without shaving. I walked over to where he sat with his elbows on his knees.
As I rubbed my hand on his shoulder, he looked up at me, searching my face for any sign of anger over his behavior. I sat down on his lap and wrapped my arms around his neck. Warmth spread across my waist as his arms wrapped around me.
I think we really did need a break.
I felt the low rumble of his chuckle as we both looked out at the ocean, its steady tide washing over the sandy coast.
Ben, I really am sorry for putting so much pressure on you. I guess I just trusted in your abilities and knowledge more than my own. I didn’t realize what I was doing.
It’s not your fault entirely. I put pressure on myself by never letting anyone else take control. I just see how you look at me… and I don’t know if I can live up to that.
I looked down at him and kissed him on his forehead, pushing his hair back from his face.
There’s nothing in the world you could do that would make me look at you any other way.
Darcy, everyone is relying on me. You heard what Richard said. Even Warden believes I have inherited my parents’ abilities.
I have no doubt you did. I see evidence of it every day in the way you plan and handle problems. But you don’t have to be an exact duplicate of your parents to take down the Society. You just have to be you.
He nodded his head, not entirely convinced.
Well, I can’t do it without you.
Yeah, because I’m such a big help.
You can do more than you think. I just haven’t given you the chance. I’ve always just tried to protect and shelter you but we’re a team. And we need to start acting like one.
Agreed. And as a team, I think our first task should be getting you some sleep.
That we can do.
I laughed as Ben abruptly stood up with me cradled in his arms and carried me to the door of our cottage. He plopped down on the bed still clutching me to his chest, smiling from ear to ear as laughter continued to pour from the depth of my soul. It seemed like an eternity since our last kiss as our lips finally touched.
Ben was right. We did need a break. A break from the mission, the Society, Warden, and the heavy burdens they brought. After our moments of weakness, no anger or resentment existed. In fact, there was a sense of relief, a weight lifted from the expectations we had placed on ourselves and one another. We were a team, a codependent partnership.
In one another’s weakness, we provided each other with the strength to continue our mission. Even as the task of defeating the Influencers seemed more and more daunting, the ever-deepening bond between Ben and I made everything worth it. A bond that strengthened under pressure, that grew in beauty every day. A bond that could never be broken.
***
Smooth, tanned skin dipped along the muscular indentations on Ben’s back. It had been hours since our intense conversation on the patio. In his exhaustion, Ben remained asleep next to me in bed, his dark hair contrasting against the white linens.
He had changed out of his jeans and t-shirt, throwing on a pair of sweatpants that now dipped down to reveal the dimples on his lower back. His face was buried in the pillow as he lay on his stomach, his back flexing as he breathed deeply.
After waking from my insatiable nightmares, I was content in watching Ben and listening to the sound of the ocean outside. Just then, my thoughts were interrupted as Ben stirred from his spot on the bed.
His eyes immediately searched for me, alert at first before softening as they landed on my face close to his own.
What time is it?
It doesn’t matter. We’re on vacation.
He raised his eyebrows playfully as he turned onto his side to face me directly.
Well, since that is true, where would you like to go?
Why do I have to decide?
It is your dream vacation.
What?
When we were still at the facility, you said you always wanted to visit Cornwall. Why else do you think I drove here?
I can’t believe you remember that.
He pulled me closer to him, into his warmth and welcoming scent.
Of course, I do. I remember everything about you.
Oh, yeah? Like what?
The color of his irises looked like an explosion of green with tiny flecks of brown and gold. He grinned as he looked over my face thoughtfully, meticulously studious to every detail.
Let’s see… You like just enough sugar in your coffee to take away the bitterness, you say complete nonsense in your sleep, your hair smells like roses, and you hate when I have a beard.
I laughed at the randomness of his facts, the last one catching my attention.
I’m still convinced my dislike of beards was the only reason we were followed back in Idaho.
You just had to get the razors.
He playfully tickled my sides as he jokingly blamed the Idaho incident on me. I couldn’t control my laughter as I wiggled away from his tickling.
It’s not my fault there’s like a hundred different razors to choose from!
You know you like the beard.
No! Shave it. Always shave it.
You know what? I think I’m going to grow it out. Mountain man style. Might even put a braid in it.
Oh my gosh. Please don’t.
His deep laughter vibrated against my back as his tickling ceased. I felt his warm lips press against my neck before he stood up from the bed. Sitting up, I looked at him questioningly.
Where are you going?
Wherever you are.
I smiled as he proceeded to get dressed, pulling on a pair of jeans and button-up. As his fingers continued down the line of buttons,
he grinned and nodded his head toward the patio.
I thought we could go see some sights.
Sliding out of bed, I rifled through my clothes and found a sweater and skinny jeans to wear with boots.
As Ben and I made our way to the car, I looked back at the small cottage he had rented for us. It stood close to the shore with no neighbor in sight. The rolling, green moors lay behind it with a dirt road leading to a nearby village.
The natural stone exterior and white windowpanes created both a welcoming warmth and dainty appearance. Dark brown in color, the shutters looked as if they had been recently replaced, as did the landscaping around the base of the cottage.
As soon as Ben and I were in the vehicle, he turned to me and smiled. He pushed several buttons on the navigation screen and pulled away from our temporary residence.
I couldn’t help but be awed by the beauty of the land. Growing up, I had seen the picturesque landscape in countless movies and read about them in terrific description in novels. Yet, seeing them with my own eyes surpassed every one of my previously established expectations.
We had been driving for some time when Ben pulled over next to a group of small buildings, several cars scattered along the pavement. He jumped out of the car quickly and came around to take my hand as I stood up from my seat.
Welcome to Tintagel Castle.
Are you serious?
Ben’s eyes twinkled in excitement as my voice elevated to an unnatural pitch in my surprise. He took my hand and started toward the seemingly never-ending stairs leading up a steep hill.
After countless steps and burning muscles, we reached the top of the hill. My eyes took in the glory of my surroundings. The rolling green hills gave way to steep, rocky cliffs and behind them, blue ocean as far as the eye could see with rocks protruding from its surface.
I dropped Ben’s hand as I walked closer to the edge of the bluff, a drawbridge leading to a cluster of stone remains on the adjacent cliff. Beneath the bridge were rock walls carved by hundreds of years of weather and beautiful blue beaches at the bottom.
Turning to look for Ben, I was surprised to find an entirely different reaction. Instead of looking around at our surroundings, Ben’s eyes were on me. His expression was tender and thoughtful as he watched me push strands of hair the breeze had misplaced behind my ear.
You want to go across the bridge?
He smiled at my giddiness and accepted my extended hand. Immediately, I began pulling him toward the start of the bridge. Once across the expanse, we were surrounded by the remnants of what was once a beautiful fortress.
My hands ran along the rough grooves of the stones, each one holding a story, a memory untold.
There are many legends that have been tied to this castle. Tristan and Isolde, Lancelot and Elaine, King Arthur…
Is that why you love it so much?
I’m not sure. I have always been drawn to their stories. Though not every story ended happily, it was the intensity of their love, their passion and convictions, that drew me in. To live so intensely and to die for that same reason is beautifully heroic.
And these few stones remaining?
Still hold stories of love and loss, victories and beginnings. A rich history of where we came from to remind us of how far we have come.
He walked slowly along the partial walls of the castle, running his hands over the stones. When I finished my statement, he dropped his hand and turned to me.
Incredibly far.
We continued to walk along the remains of the castle, making our way down the narrow walkway to the beaches down below. The cool blue water washed gently over the rock pools.
I dipped my hand down to feel the temperature of the water, flicking my wet fingers toward Ben. He dodged the water and grabbed a handful to throw back at me. Together, we hopped from rock to rock, splashing the cool water on one another.
As Ben and I finally relaxed for the first time in a long time, I couldn’t help but think of how far we had come. From the facility to the cabin to the present. The allies we had gained, the victories and losses, we had come a long way. Yet, the same plaguing, small voice from the back of my mind unfailingly reminded me how far we had yet to go.
XIII.
WAVES
Over the next couple of days, Ben and I traveled through Cornwall and visited locations I had only fantasized seeing. I would not change even the tiniest detail of the time I was able to spend with Ben. However, the relentless voice in the back of my mind persisted in reminding me that our paradise was only temporary.
On the morning of our fourth day in Cornwall, my eyes popped open suddenly and focused on the ceiling above the bed. Ben remained asleep next to me with his face buried in the pillow. The same nagging which woke me from my sleep continued to control my thoughts.
Quietly, I slipped out of bed and grabbed the burner phone from the bedside table. Looking back over my shoulder, I confirmed I had not woken Ben before opening the patio door and stepping outside into the cool breeze. Instantly, the smell of ocean water welcomed me.
My bare feet skimmed across the cool, damp stone of the patio as I made my way to one of the bistro chairs facing the ocean. The timeless waves crashed over the soft sand of the beach as I sat listening to the sounds around me: the waves collapsing over themselves, the breeze pushing my hair from my face, the seagulls calling to one another.
My thoughts wandered as I pondered the heavy weight on my chest. Images from past months flashed across the sky, Ben in the cabin, Sam in the backseat laughing, Warden pointing the gun at me. Then, like a wave, images of my mom crashed into my mind and took me to another time and place.
***
The sun clung to my golden hair as my mom and I walked along the edge of the water, the cool, wet sand firm against my heels. My mother and I looked out at the handful of surfers on their boards, waiting for the next big wave.
Mom, why do they swim away from the wave?
My mother’s soft brown eyes looked down at me in tenderness. She grinned as she bent down to look out at the surfers from my height. With one hand on my shoulder and one gesturing toward the athletes, she taught me about so much more than surfing.
You see, baby, surfing is a lot like life. It has its waves, some so big that all we want to do is swim away. But it’s when we turn to face the wave that we succeed. And that’s when life really happens.
I wouldn’t want to face a big wave. I’d be afraid it would crash over me.
Sometimes they do, baby. But when you recover, you get up and try again. That’s life. There will be failures and there will be successes. No matter how many times you fail, all that matters is that you get back up and fight harder the next time.
With misty eyes, my mother hugged me around my shoulders and stood up. She gently brushed my ponytail from my shoulder and smiled down at me.
Now, how about we get some ice cream?
***
Several tears escaped down my cheeks as the sweet memory of my mother came to an end, her warm brown eyes forever guiding me. I picked up the burner phone on the table beside me and dialed the familiar number I memorized months ago.
My voice lumped in my throat as the ringing repeated itself, the anticipation of the answer building each time. Finally, Kate’s small voice could be heard on the other end of the line.
Darcy, are you okay? It’s been days since you called! I was beginning to think you were dead.
Hey, Kate. Yeah, I’m okay. Are you guys okay?
We had to leave Texas.
Wait, what?
Some guys came looking for us. Thankfully, Richard was here to help us.
When did this happen?
Less than a week ago.
It had happened around the same time as the bombing in London. It seemed Warden had been targeting several of our allies at the same time, most likely trying to overwhelm us.
Darcy, they came in the morning with guns. Noah is still weak and I can’t get around like I used to. Richar
d was outside when it happened. They busted through the front door and grabbed me. The other guy hit Noah on his wounded shoulder and took his knee out from beneath him. I tried to fight but all I could do was watch as they beat him. Then, I heard a thump and the guy holding me crumpled to the ground.
My heart nearly beat out of my chest as words continued to flow from my best friend.
Rich had a shotgun in his hands. The guy beating Noah whirled around and caught sight of Richard right before he was knocked out with the butt of the gun. Rich tied them up, checked on us, and told us to pack immediately. We’ve been moving from place to place since.
Don’t tell me where you are. You never know who’s listening.
Oh, I won’t. Not after that. How far along are you guys in the mission?
The floodgates opened as I recounted the last week’s events to Kate. Then, my stomach dropped as I confessed what happened to Sam. She was quiet on the other end of the line at first.
Oh, poor Sam. I can’t believe it. How did they even know where you were or where he was staying?
I have no idea. But it terrified both of us. We’ve been hiding out ever since and trying to recover.
I don’t blame you.
Kate, be careful, okay? This is bigger than we ever thought.
We are. I feel like I’m just slowing everyone down. I wish I could be out there kicking butt with you and Ben.
I laughed as my petite friend’s natural feistiness made yet another appearance.
I’ll call more often.
You better. Love you, Darcy.
Love you, Kate.
As I ended the call, I heard the patio door creak open. Ben, with squinted eyes and tousled hair, emerged from the white curtains and sat next to me in one of the chairs. He was cognizant of the phone as he cautiously asked for news.
Are they okay?
His voice was taut in doubt and worry, green eyes searching my expression for any sign of mourning.
They had to leave Texas.
Warden sent men?
The Legacy: The Influencers Book 2 (The Society) Page 9