by Nicky Wells
Alex closed his eyes and exhaled. ‘You really are the best, Casey.’
‘And you’re my star, Alex.’
Casey pulled the duvet up to Alex’s chin. She turned down the lights and installed herself on the sofa, where she read until she was certain that Alex was sleeping peacefully. Despite everything that had happened, she was feeling a little horny, and she debated giving herself some relief as she lay there in the darkness. But somehow, that felt wrong too, and she fell asleep considering the ins and outs of whether it would be a good thing or a bad thing, relationship-wise, for a newly married woman to pleasure herself. At the end of the day, sex wasn’t everything. Right?
Chapter Four:
Powerless
~Alex~
‘Home at last.’ Alex took Casey’s hand as they disembarked from their plane at Heathrow. ‘Time to get back to normal.’
‘I don’t know whether to laugh or cry,’ Casey offered. ‘We had such a great time. Our honeymoon! A once-in-a-lifetime event—and now it’s over.’
‘We’ll have another honeymoon sometime,’ Alex promised her. ‘A renewal honeymoon before we get old and grey.’ He tried for levity, but Casey looked crestfallen.
‘Don’t say that! I don’t want to think about us as old and grey.’
Alex nudged his wife in the side. ‘Isn’t that rather the point of getting married? To grow old together?’
‘Sure. But that doesn’t mean I’m looking forward to it.’
Alex huffed, and it was Casey’s turn to nudge him. ‘I’m not looking forward to being old and grey, you oaf.’ She laughed. ‘I am looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you.’
‘That’s all right then.’ Alex smiled.
They joined the queue for customs and soon found themselves in the Arrivals lounge at Heathrow’s Terminal 5.
Alex let out a deep, contended sigh at the familiar sight. ‘Home at last,’ he repeated.
It was true: they had had a great honeymoon. But the fact remained that they still hadn’t made love.
Alex gulped. His feet kept pace with Casey’s as they headed towards the taxi rank outside the terminal, but his mind was miles away.
What on earth had happened to him? He felt deeply unsettled by his inability to satisfy the woman he loved. He simply couldn’t understand what was going on. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel excited. He got aroused. Horny. Desperate, even. He simply couldn’t perform.
And it wasn’t only him either. They hadn’t really talked about it, but he was certain that Casey, too, suffered from some sort of libidinal challenge. One time, he had very nearly managed to join her, but Casey’s body had been uninviting. She had been very embarrassed, and he had laughed it off, trying to be supportive in the same way she had loftily glossed over his floppiness at times. Still, if it wasn’t one of them, it was the other; and he suspected that most of the time it was both of them. All bluster and promise with no delivery. Why?
After a few sleepless nights with no answers, he had pinned his hopes for resolving their stalemate on getting home and back to normal. He had it all planned out in his head. He would carry Casey over the threshold of their house, and then he would rip her clothes off and take her on the hall floor. Or maybe on the sofa in the lounge. Perhaps on the kitchen table? They hadn’t done the kitchen table before. He chuckled.
‘What’s so funny?’ Casey broke into his thoughts.
Alex replied before he could check himself. ‘I’m thinking about our kitchen table.’
‘Our kitchen table?’
‘Yeah. You know, we’ve never done it there.’
‘Ah.’ Casey sent him a knowing look. ‘Shall we get home then? I could do with a shower.’
‘Oh gosh, me too,’ Alex agreed hastily.
‘It’ll be dinnertime by the time we get home.’ Casey was making some kind of point. Alex checked his watch. Four p.m.
‘Yeah.’ He nodded.
‘Do you reckon you’ll be up to eating?’
‘I hope so.’
‘Good. Great! Although it’ll have to be a takeaway.’
‘Of course.’
‘Because we have no food in the house.’
‘Sure.’ Takeaway always appealed.
‘Unless you fancy going shopping?’
‘Oh no, takeaway is fine.’
‘How about Thai?’
Alex concealed a grin. There was an agenda there, he could tell. He played it cool. ‘Thai is fab.’
‘Great.’ Casey smacked her lips in an exaggerated fashion. ‘I fancy something with lots of ginger. And something with lots of chilli.’
‘Sounds like a plan.’ Alex wondered about the importance of ginger and chilli, but he didn’t get a chance to ask as it was their turn to grab a taxi. He entered into negotiations with the driver about their destination and fare, and they settled into the backseat, their luggage safely stowed in the boot.
Alex watched the familiar Heathrow landscape zip past them.
‘Amazing how this whole ritual of driving home from the airport really says “you’re home”,’ he commented. He could feel some lyrics churning in his brain, words forming to capture the emotions he was experiencing.
‘Very true.’ Casey leaned against his shoulder and switched her mobile phone on. It began to beep and chirrup instantly.
Alex chortled. ‘That also says “you’re home”. Perhaps we’d better emit a sign of life to friends and rellies.’ He switched on his own phone, which instantly jumped to life.
For the next forty-five minutes, while the taxi carried them towards their little terraced house in Notting Hill, Alex and Casey tapped away at their mobile phones.
Alex finished his round of calls first. Casey was still talking to Sasha, laughing, smiling, and gesticulating widely as though Sasha could see her. Actually, Alex realised with a start, they were doing a video call so, yes, Sasha could see Casey… and him. He waved.
Casey rolled her eyes in a good-natured way. ‘Ignore him, Sasha. He’s a bit preoccupied.’
‘Is he now?’ Alex heard Sasha’s response. He flashed her what he hoped was a confident smile and turned away to leave the friends to catch up. Here was his chance…
Surreptitiously, he hopped onto a search engine to satisfy his burning curiosity. Why chilli and ginger?
Ah. Go figure. Chilli and ginger were reputed to be natural ways to enhance one’s libido. Alex grinned. He and his wife were two of a kind, and their minds definitely worked in the same ways.
At last, the taxi pulled up in front of their house. Alex paid the driver and retrieved their suitcases. He struggled up the steps to their front door and barely managed to stop Casey from entering the house.
‘Casey, wait,’ he puffed and set down the cases heavily. ‘There’s something I’ve got to do.’
Casey turned back, both feet mercifully still on the outside. ‘And what’s that?’
‘It’s customary for the husband to carry his new wife over the threshold of their home, so…’ He swooped Casey into his arms. ‘Here goes.’
Casey squealed with glee and held on tight as he shuffled them both sideways into the hallway. Their Victorian terrace was narrow, and the front door wasn’t wide enough to accommodate an adult-sized body going through it lengthwise. So Alex jiggled and squeezed and hop-stepped inside amidst much laughing, and he was very proud of himself indeed. Another tradition honoured. He planted a kiss on Casey’s mouth before he set her down, and she replied hungrily.
‘Mmmmmm-mmmmmmh!’ she moaned, and Alex’s body instantly replied to her signals. He put his arms around her waist and held her tight. Perhaps he should simply kick the door shut and take her there on the floor after all.
For a few seconds, they remained locked in their passionate embrace, and Alex’s heart beat right in his throat. But then Casey wriggled free with an apologetic smile.
‘I really need the loo,’ she whispered, hopping from foot to foot. ‘So sorry!’
‘That’s okay.’
His voice came out all squeaky like that of a hormonal teenager, and Alex coughed to clear his throat. ‘No problem. I’ll get the cases in and make a cuppa, shall I?’
‘That would be lovely. You’re the best! I won’t be a minute.’
Casey hurried upstairs, and Alex retrieved their belongings from outside their front door.
‘Where do you want the suitcases, honey?’ he called out.
‘Oh. Good question. Leave them downstairs. I’ll put a wash on later.’ Casey’s voice emerged muffled from the upstairs bathroom.
‘The kitchen, then.’ Alex hauled the luggage into their open-plan kitchen-diner and piled it strategically near the washing machine. Next, he filled the kettle with water and switched it on. His mind was playing out ‘scenarios for later’ while he took two mugs out of the cupboard and added teabags and sugar. He had visions of visiting every room in the house, making love on the kitchen table, the sofa, the hall floor, the guest bed, the main bed—who knows, maybe even in the bath? He was dreaming up a romantic marathon, and he was raring to go.
He drummed his fingers on the kitchen counter as the kettle failed to boil, but that didn’t speed matters up. Impatient, he went to the fridge to get the milk. The very moment he opened the fridge door he remembered that there would be no food. He stared inside anyway, confused as to why it was so dark. At the same time, the complete lack of hissing and spluttering from the kettle finally registered in his brain, and he abandoned the fridge. The kettle was dead.
‘Alex?’
‘Hm?’
‘There’s no hot water.’ Casey stepped into the kitchen, her face the picture of dismay.
Alex straightened up. ‘Sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with the kettle—’
‘Forget the kettle. I mean, there’s no hot water anywhere.’
‘Really? How come?’
‘How should I know?’ Casey snapped at him and looked immediately contrite. ‘Sorry.’
‘No worries. Let’s have a look at the boiler.’ Alex squared his shoulders. The boiler was his domain. They had pink jobs and blue jobs, and pink appliances and blue appliances. The washing machine was pink, which is why he had been wise to leave the dirty clothes in the suitcases. The boiler was definitely blue.
He opened the boiler cupboard and frowned. ‘The control lights are off.’
Casey meanwhile flicked on the switch for the ceiling lights. No lights came on. He heard her open the fridge door and close it again while he was still staring at the boiler, willing the little green lamp to glow. Then he heard her open the freezer door and gag. A vile smell instantly filled the room, and the freezer door slammed shut.
‘Eurgh.’ Casey retched. ‘We’ve no electricity. And everything in the freezer is completely spoiled. It’s revolting.’
‘We’ve no lecy?’ Alex echoed. ‘As in, there’s a power cut?’
‘I don’t know. It would have to be an awfully long power cut for all the food in the freezer to defrost. It must have been off for days.’
‘Hmm.’ Alex’s heart sank. Dealing with utility companies was also a blue job, so it would fall to him to figure out what had happened. But that wasn’t why he was frustrated. He was frustrated because once more his plans had been foiled. There was no way they would be getting romantic under the circumstances. He suppressed a sigh.
Really, he raged silently as he leafed through their electricity bills in search of the emergency contact number, someone up there has it in for us. What have we ever done to upset the god of love? Why can’t we just come home like normal people, get a takeaway, have a shower, and make mad passionate love?
‘Hey, chin up.’ Casey was philosophical about it. ‘We can still have that takeaway. And who knows? With a bit of luck, the power will be back on quickly and we can get on with things.’ There was a definite double meaning there, and she winked. Alex’s spirits lifted slightly. Perhaps Casey was right, and this would all be fixed quickly.
He started making phone calls and soon discovered that their house had somehow disconnected itself from the main electricity supply.
‘The junction box to your house has blown,’ the electricity distributor informed him rather too cheerfully. ‘We’ll get the engineers out to you now. Don’t worry, mate, you’ll be connected up again in a few hours.’
So while they were waiting for the engineers, Alex found himself pacing the floor, emptying out the drawers of spoiled food from the freezer, washing them in cold water—yuck—and pacing the floor once more. Casey went to get their Thai takeaway meal and wine. When she returned, they lit some candles and ate their meal at the kitchen table, all the while keeping an ear out for any signs of builders showing up outside.
But it wasn’t until nearly ten in the evening that the building crew arrived at last. Instantly, the street’s peace and quiet was shattered by much drilling, digging, and rumbustious swearing.
‘This is a nightmare,’ Alex complained. ‘All I wanted was to come home from our honeymoon, unpack, unwind, and…’
‘Shh. I know.’ Casey tried to soothe him. ‘It’s not exactly what I had in mind either.’ She smiled. ‘Although if the power doesn’t come back on anytime soon, it’ll be a candlelit evening all the way. That’s quite romantic, don’t you think?’
Alex did a double take. ‘What are you saying?’
Casey purred. ‘We had a nice dinner. We have more wine, we can’t watch telly, and we’re all alone…’
‘Bar the builders outside.’
‘Yeah, but they’re outside. And they’re busy.’ Casey walked around the room and blew out all the candles, plunging the lounge into near darkness. Now the only illumination came from the mobile lighting rig the building crew had erected by the hole they were digging.
‘We’re inside, in the dark,’ Casey continued. ‘They can’t see us, even though we can see them. Don’t you think that’s exciting?’
‘Hm.’ Alex laughed softly. ‘I suppose it could be.’
‘Come here.’ Casey tugged at his hands. ‘That’s better.’ She wrapped her arms around him and stroked his back.
‘Kinky,’ Alex murmured into her hair. He couldn’t believe she was going for it.
‘Opportunistic,’ Casey mumbled back. ‘They’ll be hours yet.’
‘Want to go upstairs?’
‘No!’
Alex was surprised by her emphatic reaction, but he didn’t bat an eyelid.
Casey softened her response. ‘No. Let’s not go upstairs. Let’s just… you know. Here. Now.’
She reached up and kissed him on the mouth. Faced with such persuasive tactics, Alex wasn’t up to much resistance. He returned her kiss eagerly. Within seconds, their hands where all over each other, stroking, encouraging, urging on. They were breathing heavily and swaying like a tree caught in a storm.
Somewhere at the back of Alex’s mind, he began to wonder about logistics. Lying down would be much easier than standing up. Or sitting down, at the very least. Perhaps he could manoeuvre Casey back round toward the sofa?
He gently turned his wife, and Casey yielded to his touch.
‘Mmmm,’ she moaned. ‘I love you!’
‘I love you too,’ he replied. He lifted her arms and tugged at her T-shirt, trying to lift it over her head. She wriggled and shimmied, stretching her arms up high to help him. Alex groaned appreciatively as he caught sight of her boobs encased in a black lacy bra.
‘Hello, girls,’ he breathed. ‘I’ll get you out of there shortly.’
Casey giggled. Right at that moment, the lights came on.
‘What the fu—’
Alex dropped Casey’s shirt like it was on fire, and they shrank apart. They blinked at each other in the glare of their ceiling lights, utterly confused.
The foreman appeared at the lounge window and knocked sharply. ‘You’re back on now,’ he shouted.
His crew clapped and cheered, with a few wolf whistles thrown in for good measure. Shouts of ‘more, more!’ could be heard, and it took Alex a
few seconds to work out that those were directed at him and Casey. They were on display like mannequins in a shop window. The foreman waved, and the crew clapped louder.
‘I think we have an audience,’ Casey remarked, sounding half embarrassed and half amused. She blushed furiously and raked her hands through her hair as if to restore her decency.
‘Looks like it,’ Alex agreed, feeling mortified. ‘How embarrassing. What shall we do?’
‘Let’s wave at them. Might as well give them a show.’ Casey grinned and waggled her fingers in the direction of the windows. Alex followed her example, and they elicited a round of applause.
Casey exploded with laughter and took a bow for the builders’ benefit. ‘Just imagine,’ she said to Alex. ‘It could have been so much worse. At least all they got to see was a bit of skin. Two minutes later…’
‘I suppose you’re right.’ Alex enfolded her in his arms, and they watched as the building crew lost interest in them. Instead, they began packing up their tools and finally left.
‘Do you reckon it’s maybe time for bed?’ Casey eventually suggested, when all was quiet and deserted outside once more.
‘Bed? As in bed?’ Alex wondered: Did she really have it in her to finish this?
‘Err—no. Maybe not. I think that moment has gone. Sorry.’ Casey smiled apologetically. ‘It must be nearly midnight. I was thinking of bed, as in sleep?’
‘Sleep would be good,’ Alex concurred readily. His mojo had completely evaporated, and he wasn’t in the mood to resurrect it. It had been a long day, too long. ‘I’m all for oblivion.’
~Casey~
‘Right. That’s another load in.’ Casey stood back with a satisfied smile and pushed the button. Water sloshed into the washing machine, and the drum starting rotating. Her darks got lost in soapy suds, and she turned her attention to folding the load that had just come out of the tumble dryer.