by Joan Jonker
Running a hand across her forehead, Molly told herself not to be so miserable over such a stupid thing. If Bella had done something out of place, then it was up to her mother to sort her out. Bella was naïve because she hadn’t been allowed to grow up, and it was up to her parents now to deal with it.
So, with that thought firmly in her head, Molly started her housework humming. The fireplace thought it was its birthday, it was so shiny it could see itself in the reflection of the highly polished sideboard. And upstairs in the bedrooms, the bedding was given such a good shaking, it gave a sigh of pleasure and went to sleep as soon as Molly left the room.
When half past ten came, Nellie could hear her mate singing as she raised the knocker, and she was invited in with a waving hand and a face smiling and happy. ‘What’s got into you, girl? Yer haven’t had a sly bottle of milk stout, have yer?’
‘No, sunshine, I haven’t. But look at those white clouds bobbing and drifting in a beautiful clear blue sky. Doesn’t it make yer feel happy, and glad to be alive?’
Nellie squeezed past her in the tiny hall. ‘If it’s not milk stout yer’ve had, then the water in your tap must be different from ours, ’cos the blue sky doesn’t have the same effect on me. I wouldn’t have even noticed it if yer hadn’t pointed it out! I don’t look up much, yer see.’ She made straight to the carver chair and placed it at the table. ‘D’yer know why I don’t look up, girl? Well, it’s because yer never find anything that way. If yer look down, on the other hand, yer might just find a tanner, or a threepenny bit what someone has dropped. A lot of people have holes in their pockets, yer know, and things do fall through.’
‘I know you’ve got a hole in yer pocket, sunshine, but I’ve never known yer to lose anything out of it.’ Molly stood by the kitchen door, waiting for the kettle to boil. ‘Anyway, walking with yer head down has its drawbacks. Yer could walk into a lamppost and give yerself a black eye. Or yer could bump into someone, stand on their toes, and they’d give a yer a black eye.’
Nellie squinted at her mate. ‘Did you and Jack have an early night in bed last night?’
‘No we didn’t, sunshine! We were late getting to bed as it happens, because Ruthie came in later than usual and got a telling off.’
Nellie chuckled. ‘So what ye’re trying to tell me, girl, is that yer didn’t have the time or the energy?’ She tutted. ‘Me, now, I’d make the time, and find the energy, no matter what time of day or night it was.’
The kettle began to whistle, and Molly said, ‘Saved by the bell.’ She then hurried out to switch off the gas before pouring the boiling water into the teapot. ‘I’m in a happy mood now, and don’t want to know about the shenanigans yer get up to in yer bedroom.’ There was silence as she prepared the tray, then she said, ‘Anyway, a woman of your age should be past talking about a subject that should only be discussed by man and wife. It’s private, and should stay that way.’
Nellie’s feet began swinging under the chair. ‘I thought it wouldn’t last, girl, it was too good to be true. Yer were all smiles when yer opened the door to me, full of the joys of spring. I’ve been here five minutes and yer’ve got a face on yer what would stop a clock.’
‘I’m sorry about that, sunshine, there’s little I can do about it because it’s the only face I’ve got. But if yer don’t want to look at it, I don’t mind. I don’t get upset easily, not like some people I know. Anyway, yer tea’s in front of yer, yer’ve got two biscuits in the saucer, so consider yerself lucky.’
Nellie dunked her biscuits in the tea, and within seconds they had disappeared. Then she wiped the back of a hand across her mouth before putting her bosom on the table and leaning across to be as near to Molly as possible. ‘Ay, girl, I’ve got some news for yer. Phoebe’s going into town on Wednesday to choose her wedding dress. She’s taking the afternoon off work, ’cos Ellen doesn’t work all day, with Wednesday being half-day closing, and they’re going together.’
‘Oh, that’s nice,’ Molly said. ‘Ellen will be over the moon. The first of her children to get married. I bet her and Corker are delighted. I can picture Corker on the day of the wedding, he’ll be as proud as a peacock. And I bet Phoebe will look beautiful, walking down the aisle on his arm. A pretty girl and a handsome man.’
Nellie dropped her head and gazed through her eyelashes at Molly. ‘I told George that I should be going with Phoebe on Wednesday, seeing as Ellen is going. He told me not to be so bloody daft.’ She grunted. ‘I know Ellen is mother of the bride, but I’m mother of the groom and we should be on equal footing.’
‘I’m afraid I feel the same as George about that, sunshine. I mean, I can’t see your Paul in a white wedding dress and carrying a bouquet, can you? If ye’re going to look at it that way, then Ellen should go with Paul to choose his suit!’
‘Don’t start getting sarky, Molly Bennett, there’s no need for it! I only mentioned it, and I still think Phoebe and Ellen wouldn’t mind if I asked them nicely.’
‘If yer had the nerve to ask, they would probably say yer could go with them because they wouldn’t like to refuse. Yer’d put them in an awkward position, Nellie, and I don’t think yer should do that. In fact, if I’m to be honest, I think yer’d have a ruddy cheek! Yer own common sense should tell yer it wouldn’t be right. Neither Phoebe nor Ellen are in any way related to you, so yer really shouldn’t expect to be involved.’
‘I’ll be Phoebe’s mother-in-law when she marries our Paul, so we’ll be related then, and what difference does a few ruddy weeks make?’
‘The difference is she is not yer daughter-in-law as yet, and not related to you in any way. Besides all this, no bride wants anyone, no matter who they are, to see the bridal dress until the wedding day. Don’t yer see now, after all that, how wrong you are, or have I been wasting me breath?’
‘Oh, yer haven’t been wasting yer breath, girl, yer’ve given me a headache with it.’
‘I’m sorry yer’ve got a headache, sunshine, but yer’ve brought it on yerself. Yer always want to be involved in everything, even though it’s got nothing to do with you. Why don’t yer leave Paul and Phoebe to get on with what they want for their wedding? They should be looking forward to the happy day, making plans together, being excited and secretive. Especially Phoebe, who won’t even let Paul see her dress until she’s walking down the aisle on Corker’s arm. Don’t begrudge her that, sunshine. Remember when you were young and in love, and how excited yer were on yer wedding day? I remember how it was with me, I couldn’t sleep for weeks before me and Jack got married. We weren’t well off in those days, so there was no expensive dress or flowers, and no reception. All we had as regards a party was having some neighbours in for a glass of sherry and a piece of wedding cake me ma had made. But we enjoyed ourselves. We were in love, and still are.’
Her mate’s words had Nellie going back in time, and there was a gentle smile on her face. ‘Yeah, it was the same for me and George. We saved up to buy the rings, and I was married in a second-hand dress, and George had his dad’s suit on, ’cos his own was frayed. Our two mothers got together and bought enough eats to have a party in our house. Mind you, there were so many neighbours came, we all ended up in the street having a right old knees-up. As me ma said, “Yer don’t need to have money to enjoy yerself, queen, just good friends and neighbours.”’
‘Your mam was right, sunshine, and we’re here to prove she was right. For twenty-five years we’ve been both neighbours and friends, and that’s good going. Not that there hasn’t been the odd difference of opinion now and again, but that is only to be expected. It would be a dull world if everyone thought alike.’
‘We’ve never come to blows, girl, that’s the main thing. It doesn’t matter if we lose our rag now and again. I bet St Peter loses his temper sometimes with all the bad people in the world. And he can’t swear to get it off his chest, not like we can. If I get in a temper, like banging me toe on the table leg, well, I can have a good swear and it makes me feel better.’
<
br /> ‘Yer don’t have to use bad words to make yer feel better,’ Molly told her. ‘If yer stub yer toe, like I do sometimes, then “blast” is as good a word as any.’
‘That’s what I say, girl! I often say blast!’
‘Oh, come on now, sunshine, be honest. Yer don’t always say blast! When yer banged yer knee on the corner of the sideboard last week, I distinctly heard yer saying, “Damn, blast and bugger it.”’
‘Ay, girl, I didn’t half hurt me knee that day, it left a big bruise on me leg. Yer didn’t expect me to say “Oh dear, golly heck”, did yer, when I was in agony?’
Molly burst out laughing. ‘I can see you, in me imagination of course, sitting in the Adelphi, having tea and cucumber sandwiches, with yer little finger sticking out. And you drop a few crumbs on the floor, look down, and say, “Oh, drat.”’
‘What does that mean, girl? I’ve never heard that before.’
‘It’s what the posh people say, instead of “Oh, bugger it.”’ ‘Ooh, I’ll have to remember that.’ Nellie’s chins were in complete agreement with her. ‘I will remember it, ’cos it’s an easy word.’ She leaned over the table, grimaced when she crushed her breasts, then a cheeky grin appeared. ‘Oh, drat, I’ve hurt me bleeding bust now!’
Molly’s laughter filled the room. ‘Helen Theresa McDonough, what am I going to do with yer? Only you could be posh and as common as muck in the same sentence.’
‘Ay, I’m going to try that on George tonight, and see if he knows what it means.’ She gazed at the ceiling for inspiration, then turned a smiling face to Molly. ‘I know what I’ll do, girl, I’ll drop a fork when I’m giving him his dinner, and say, “Oh, drat!”’
‘What good would that do yer, sunshine? Except yer’d have to take the fork out and wash it again.’
‘Would I heck!’ Nellie said, her eyes rolling to the ceiling. ‘George could wash it himself, or else he could eat his dinner with his ruddy fingers. No, girl, I’d only do that to see if my feller knew what “drat” meant! To catch him out, like. He thinks I’m as thick as two short planks, so let’s find out if he’s as clever as he makes out.’
‘Well, if you want to play silly beggars, sunshine, that’s up to you. I just don’t know what yer’ll gain from it, except one dirty fork. Still, to each his own, eh? We’re all entitled to our opinion.’
‘Ye’re right to a certain extent, girl, but if we all stuck to our opinion, and never gave in, then the world would be in a hell of a state, wouldn’t it?’ Nellie’s face wore a serious expression, as though she was weighing up a matter of importance. Then she narrowed her eyes to slits when she looked at Molly. ‘It wouldn’t work, yer know, girl, no matter what yer say. Yer could talk to me until yer were blue in the face, but yer wouldn’t change my opinion on Elsie Flanaghan. See what I mean, girl? She passed a few comments on me being fat, made rude remarks, and I’ll never forgive her.’
Molly’s mouth opened wide in disbelief. ‘Nellie, Elsie Flanaghan passed a comment which I didn’t like, regarding our Jill and Steve when they first went to live with Lizzie Corkhill. She said they were cadging off Lizzie, and I pulled her up over it. But you can’t pass her without belting her. She’s like a red flag to a bull, yer can’t resist fighting with her. Yer’ve knocked her flying a few times, for no reason at all. She’s terrified of yer now, and runs a mile when she sees yer!’
Nellie’s head nodded vigorously. ‘Yeah, ’cos she knows what she’ll get if I ever catch up with her. She can’t half run fast, she’s like a whippet. But one of these days I’ll catch her when she’s not looking.’
‘And what will yer do then, sunshine? Make a holy show of yerself ? It’s a pity yer’ve got nothing better to think of than Elsie Flanaghan, that’s all I can say. Why don’t yer think of something nice, like yer son’s wedding? It’s a big day in Paul’s life and yours. He’s getting a wonderful wife in Phoebe, and you’re gaining a lovely daughter-in-law. Yer should be full of the joys of spring, having so much to look forward to.’
Nellie sent the cups rattling in the saucers when she banged a fist on the table. ‘Ye’re right, girl, as usual. I have got a lot to look forward to. I mean, like, I should be looking at wedding hats, and dresses. Why don’t we go into town again and have a good look around? We didn’t look proper when we went last week, we spent too long in the café.’
‘Whose fault was that, sunshine? You were the one who wanted to go in Reece’s in the first place, not me. And yer were the one who wanted a second helping. It was very nice, I have to admit,’ Molly said. ‘But I would have been happy going around a few shops to see what they had to offer in dresses and hats suitable for a wedding. But let’s leave it until Saturday, Nellie, when I’ve had me housekeeping money off Jack. I put a couple of bob away last week, and I’ll do the same this week. It’s not enough to buy a dress, or a hat, but some shops will put things aside for yer as long as yer leave a deposit.’
‘Ooh, ay, that’s a good idea, girl, I would never have thought of that. So shall we definitely go on Saturday?’
Molly nodded. ‘Yeah, as soon as we’ve got the dinner over. I’ll leave the dishes to Jack, it’ll give us a bit more time, and he won’t mind. And now we’ve settled that, can we get a move on now? I want to call to Doreen’s and Jill’s before we go to the shops. We won’t stay long in each house, just see the babies and have a little chat. Then this afternoon I’ll walk round to see me ma and da. I should go round more than I do. With Tommy and Rosie out at work every day, they’re on their own and would welcome some company.’
‘I’ll come with yer, girl, to keep yer company on the way there and back.’
Molly chuckled. ‘Nellie, it’s only a few minutes’ walk! Still, I’d feel there was something missing if yer didn’t come. You and me remind me of that song “Me And My Shadow”. I’m me, and you’re my shadow.’
‘Nah, I’m too fat to be your shadow, girl. If I was asked to describe you and me, I’d say we were the long and short of it.’
Molly patted Nellie’s back as she followed her to the front door. ‘Very good, Nellie! Yer can go to the top of the class for that.’
‘Wait until I tell Victoria, I bet she’ll have a laugh.’
‘I’m sure she will, sunshine. But don’t mention Phoebe and Ellen going to town on Wednesday to look at wedding dresses, because they’ll think ye’re just jealous.’
‘Well, I am jealous, girl, and I’d be telling a lie if I said I wasn’t. But after George having a go at me, and then you, I’ve decided two heads are better than one, so I’m going to keep me mouth shut.’
When Nellie stepped on to the pavement, she turned to say, ‘Ay, girl, your Jill’s pram is outside Doreen’s, which means they’ll be going for their own shopping.’
‘I’ll give a knock anyway, sunshine, just to see the babies. And me daughters and Victoria, of course. I wouldn’t leave them out, even though it sounded like it.’
Doreen opened the door before Molly had time to knock. ‘We saw yer coming, Mam.’ She stood aside to let them pass, giving them each a kiss. ‘Jill’s here, but yer already know that with the pram outside.’
Molly’s whole face lit up at the reception she received as she walked through the door. Jill ran to hug her, and the two babies screamed and struggled to reach out to her. ‘Anyone would think they were glad to see you, Molly,’ Victoria said. ‘You’re very popular.’
Nellie pushed her mate aside. ‘Only because she got in first and is bigger than me. But look at little Moll, she’s holding her arms out to me. She knows who her best grandma is.’
Jill passed little Moll to Nellie, and Doreen put Bobby down on the floor so she could talk to her mother and Jill, so her eyes weren’t on him as he crawled towards Nellie. He covered the space quickly, then sat back on his bottom with his arms in the air. The only person who saw what happened next was Victoria. Her laughter caught in her throat and brought about a wheezing cough. It was this sound that caused Molly and her daughters to turn. And what a si
ght it was that met their eyes. Bobby had put his arms up to pull himself to his feet by clutching at Nellie’s clothes. But his hands had gone under her dress, and it was her fleecy knickers he’d grabbed and pulled on, and they were now hanging around her ankles.
‘He’s pulled me bleeding knickers down!’ Nellie’s face was a picture as she told little Moll, ‘Ay, he’s starting young, isn’t he?’
After a hearty laugh, Molly said, ‘Oh, if we only had a camera! It’s not often yer see a sight like that, thank goodness.’ As she moved to relieve Nellie of little Moll, Doreen swept Bobby up in her arms. ‘I’m not going to say you’re naughty, darling, because ye’re too young to understand. But although I think Auntie Nellie looks hilarious, don’t ever do it again.’
Nellie hadn’t been able to touch her feet for years because her mountainous bosom and huge tummy got in the way. So she shuffled to the kitchen with the knickers holding her back, muttering under her breath. Then, with her two hands on the sink, she looked down at the bloomers covering her feet. ‘I can’t reach down to pull yer up, yer silly bugger, so I’m going to have to step out of yer. And if this floor is dirty, don’t blame me.’
Three heads popped round the door, and amid the laughter it was Molly who said, ‘Ye’re not coming to the shops with me with no knickers on, Nellie McDonough. What are yer thinking about? Pull them up and make yerself respectable.’
Nellie turned her head slowly and if looks could kill, then Molly would be dead. ‘I can’t reach down to take them off, but I can catch them if I kick them in the air. And if ye’re too much of a snob to go out with me ’cos I’ve got no knickers on, then it’s just too bad. I’ll walk behind yer if it makes yer feel better.’
‘Oh, dear, oh, dear,’ Molly said. ‘What a flipping performance! Just stay as yer are, Nellie, and I’ll pull yer knickers up halfway. Yer can manage the rest yerself.’ She pushed her two daughters back into the living room. ‘Let’s have a bit of privacy, shall we? Nellie’s not worried who sees her, but I am. So just close the door till I sort her out.’