He set the bloody glass shard on the countertop. Opened a cabinet, bent over, and reached for the dustpan. The picture frame caught him on the side of his head, a sharp, glancing blow that left him dizzy.
Dizzy and furious.
He flew across the room and backed Bella into the wall. Caged in his arms, she looked like a tiny, wizened old bird, but he knew better. He pried the small paring knife from her hands and dropped it to the floor. It wasn’t the first time she’d come at him with a blade, so drunk she mistook him for his father one minute, an intruder the next.
Somehow, he always managed to convince himself it wasn’t him she wanted to hurt.
“Stop it,” he said.
Bella glared, her eyes still distant and somewhere else. “You’re just like him.”
“I am him. It’s me, Levi.”
The back door opened. Old Mr. Draper stepped in, his hands raised in a placating gesture and his eyes fixed on Bella. Levi wondered how much he’d heard before he’d made his move. The old man had put himself between them more times than Levi could count. “Everything all right in here, folks?”
Mr. Draper moved forward, maneuvering around the broken glass and shattered crockery. He reached Levi’s side and put a hand on his arm. “Step away, son. You’re bleeding. Your momma will be fine with me a minute.”
Levi lowered his arms. Warmth trickled down the side of his face. More blood. Great. He drifted to the sink and rinsed the gash in his forearm under the tap. Behind him, he could hear Mr. Draper murmuring to Bella in his soothing voice. The old dude could charm the birds from the trees, but it wasn’t working today.
“No,” Bella said, her voice rising again. “No, no, no. I don’t care who he thinks he is, he’s not having my money.”
“He’s not taking your money, Bella, darlin’. That’s Levi, your boy. He’s taking care of you.”
Bella snorted in a way that belied her petite, feminine frame. “He takes care of no one but himself. All he cares about are his Nancy fairy boys, just like his dad.”
Levi spun around, his wounds forgotten. “What did you say?”
“Levi…” Mr. Draper moved between them. “She doesn’t know what she’s saying. Leave it. Go home. I’ll clean up here.”
Levi stared hard at Bella. Often when she lost her mind, it was obvious in her face. Her eyes would become vacant, her voice distant. Even when she screamed in his face, he knew she couldn’t really see him. She didn’t look like that now. Though clouded by alcohol, her eyes were clear. Clear, evil, and fixed on him. “What did you say?” he repeated lowly. “You’ve been saying it all damn night. Finish what you started.”
“What happened to you, Levi?” Bella shook her head. “You loved football and wrestling. Rock music and beer. You were my big, strong boy. What happened to you? He died, goddamn it, and yet he’s all I can see.”
“Like him? What? Fucking miserable? B, if that’s what you want, you’ve succeeded, okay? Let it go.”
“No. Don’t give me that. You’re not miserable. You’re proud of what you are. I can see it in you. Don’t think I can’t. You’re everything he wanted to be. I can even smell it. I can smell him, you dirty faggot bitch. I wish you’d never been born.”
Levi felt like a semitruck had driven into his chest. He’d never been sure Bella knew he was gay, but clearly she did. What the fuck was she trying to say? That his father had been gay too? That he’d killed himself rather than live with the shame? Killed himself rather than face her hate? He stepped forward, a rage long forgotten gripping him and surging through his veins.
Mr. Draper met him halfway, his old, wrinkled arms unyielding and strong. “Don’t, son. You’ll hate yourself in the morning. Go home. I’ll take care of her.”
Levi shook himself free. Took a step back. “Don’t bother,” he said, as much to himself as anyone else. “Leave her. Leave her to rot. I’m done.”
* * * *
“She hasn’t banged you up this bad for a while. Why do you let her do it, man?”
Levi slid into AJ’s truck with a heavy sigh, unsure of his answer. He could overpower Bella with one arm tied behind his back, yet somehow, she always managed to take a chunk out of him. Somehow, he didn’t see it coming. Or perhaps he did, and he didn’t care enough to move. Who knew? He didn’t.
“Sorry for dragging you out of bed. They told me not to drive, and I left my cell phone there—”
AJ cut him off. “Dude, you’ve got six stitches in your arm, three in your head, and a mild concussion. I was always going to pick you up, no matter what. You shoulda called me from your momma’s house. Don’t worry about it.”
Levi leaned back in his seat as AJ pulled the car onto the road. It was late—after midnight—but though he was exhausted, his mind was wide-awake. Bella’s harsh, bitter voice echoed in his head.
“You’re just like him. You dirty faggot bitch.”
She’d said it before, but not for a long time. Was it really possible? He searched his memories—those faraway formative years in Texas, the chaotic childhood he’d spent on the wrong side of LA—searched for any clue that Bella’s cruel ramblings could be true. But he found nothing. He’d loved his father like every son should, but in truth, he’d been a stranger. Ernesto Ramone had spent most of his time locked up in his backstreet chop shop, facilitating the gangs of car thieves and ringers from their neighborhood. Levi rarely saw him. It was only by chance that he’d inherited his trade and built it into something legitimate.
“You’re everything he wanted to be.”
Levi doubted that.
“Dude, wake up. You’re home.”
He opened his eyes and lifted his head from the window. AJ pulled the hand brake up and shifted in his seat. “You can crash at my place if you want. Sherri won’t mind.”
“Nah, it’s okay. I’m pretty beat. I’ll be out like a light.”
AJ grinned. “That’s what I’m worried about. That hot nurse said to keep an eye on you.”
“What hot nurse?”
“The chick with the big… Oh, fuck it. Never mind. Even after all these years I forget you don’t see that shit.”
Levi had to smile at that. “Still? Really?”
“Hey, you know I’m cool with everything. I forget, is all. You’re, well, you’re you, you know? So I forget we don’t see the world the same way.”
“That don’t make no sense.”
AJ shrugged. “You know what I mean.”
He didn’t, he had no idea, but it didn’t matter. AJ was the coolest motherfucker in town, and he’d had his back for years. “Thanks for picking me up, man. See you in the morning.”
“Hey.” AJ reached out and caught his arm. “What are you gonna do? About your mom, I mean. This shit can’t go on. It’s going to kill you one way or another.”
Levi looked down at his bandaged arm and felt the pulsing sting in his temple. AJ was right, of that there was no doubt, but the solution was less clear. There was every chance Bella’s drunken ramblings were just that—ramblings—and their encounter today was no worse than many they’d had before. He’d driven away from her so sure he would never go back, but really, what had changed?
“Ask me tomorrow.”
He got out of the car. His phone vibrated in his pocket. He pulled it out as AJ’s taillights disappeared into the night.
Have it your way. 3 weeks, tough guy. Make them count—S
Chapter Ten
“So, how’s tricks, man?”
Levi leaned back on the bar, absorbing the familiar, intoxicating atmosphere of Silver, enjoying the sight of the densely packed dance floor. Pounding music pulsated through his veins, the baseline so deep his bones buzzed with every beat. The club was dark and heady, lit only by scattered blue spotlights, and the air thick with the scent of sweat and sex. Cam was right. He did need to get out more.
He tipped back the last of his beer, nodded at the bare-chested barman for another. “Same old, same old.”
It was mostl
y true. He didn’t feel like explaining the costly broken bike ramp at the garage, or his healing wounds. Or that he hadn’t checked on Bella for the best part of two weeks.
Cam raised an eyebrow, his sparkling green eyes bright with mischief. “Oh, yeah? Looking forward to your big orgy this weekend?”
“Thought you were worried about my mental well-being,” Levi retorted drily. “You went all Dr. Phil on me last time I saw you.”
Cam shifted on his bar stool and shrugged. “I was worried, but you’ve had weeks to back out, so I figure you must actually want to do it. Am I right?”
Levi leaned over and swiped Cam’s bourbon chaser, chugging it before Cam could protest. He didn’t want to talk about the impending three-way. It was Thursday night. The shoot was scheduled for Saturday afternoon, leaving him less than forty-eight hours to get his game face on. The very thought made his eyes water. Despite Sonny’s best efforts to persuade him, he hadn’t managed to venture beyond having three fingers inside him, and even then, he suspected the unrivaled thrill he got from it had more to do with the heat of the body behind him than the sensation of his own fingers crammed in his ass. Besides, he hadn’t seen Sonny for a while—Sonny had been busy, apparently—and his one attempt at flying solo had been an epic fail.
”What are you going to do instead? Bend over and hope for the best?”
Yep, looked that way.
“So? What’s the deal? Are you psyched, or what?”
“Or what.”
Levi raised his middle finger but was saved from Cam’s patented in-depth analysis by a pair of arms sliding around his waist—slim, pale arms that belonged to Kai, the blond he’d filmed with a few weeks before. “You didn’t call.”
Levi grinned in greeting, taking in the sight of Kai dressed only in a pair of tiny designer briefs. He stared with muted interest. Despite the charged air of the club and the grind of Kai’s crotch on his thigh, away from the cameras, Kai did little for him. “Hey there, doll. How’ve you been?”
“You’d know if you’d called me.”
Kai pressed his lithe body farther into Levi for emphasis. Levi played along, holding out his arms so Kai could clamber up onto his lap. “Why would I need to call you? You’re right here.”
“You’re just about hot enough to get away with a line that cheap.” Kai reached for the hem of Levi’s shirt and pulled it up to reveal Levi’s stomach. He paused, his eyes fixed on Levi’s face, gauging his reaction, then pulled it over his head.
“Only just? And yet here you are. What are you doing here, anyway? Workin’?” Levi had Kai’s slight body pegged for a dancer, and he could think of no other reason for him to be running around the club in his underwear. It was a little early for that, even for a club as risqué as Silver.
“Yeah, actually, I’m supposed to be backstage now, but I saw you and thought I’d try and get a good-luck kiss from you. How am I doing?”
Beside Levi, Cam spluttered into his drink. It was well-known within the studio’s inner circle that Levi didn’t kiss—not on-screen, and not during any of the casual hookups that happened off set. Kai was new and clearly out of the loop. He was also a damned sight braver than when Levi saw him last. “Not so well with the kissing thing, sugar. It ain’t my scene. Besides, what do you need luck for? Don’t you get up on that stage three nights a week like the other dancers?”
“Hey, you can’t blame a guy for trying. I’m dancing with Sonny tonight, so I’ll have to ogle him instead.”
“Yeah?” Levi leaned forward, his interest piqued. “Maybe I’d like to watch that. Which stage are you on?”
“That one.” Kai pointed to the small stage farthest away from the bar, kissed Levi’s cheek, and slid off his lap all in one smooth motion. “I gotta run. It was nice to see you. You’re much nicer than everyone says you are.”
He scampered away. Levi watched him go, but his mild irritation was tempered by the nagging anticipation brewing in his belly. Levi had taken to ignoring Sonny’s texts and calls, hoping to put off the inevitable discomfort of taking his scene preparations forward, but there was no denying he’d missed him. Despite his stubborn silence, Sonny sent him a message of sarcastic encouragement every day, sometimes two. In recent days, he’d found himself waiting on those damned messages, his heart skipping a beat when Sonny’s name flashed up on his cell phone screen.
“You’ve got an admirer there,” Cam said, eyeing Kai’s rapidly disappearing bare back. “That kid was drooling.”
Levi shoved him. “Shut up. He’s just hot for the scene we did. He’ll get over it.”
Cam snickered. “Oh, yeah? Why’d he run off with your shirt, then?”
“What?” Levi looked down where his shirt had been draped on his lap. It was gone. Damn. Not that it mattered. There weren’t many guys running around in their underwear, but there were plenty without shirts.
The lights in the club dimmed, signaling the dancers’ impending arrival onstage. Cam slid Levi a fresh beer. “Want to go out back and raid Jon’s liquor cabinet?”
Smoke began to mist over the four small stages set out on the dance floor. Levi’s gaze zeroed in on the one farthest from the bar. “Nah, I’m good here.”
Flashing lights wrapped the stage in an eerie glow. A deep, sensual beat filled the club, buzzing through the floor and into Levi’s veins. The rest of the club, even Cam beside him, faded away, and he could see nothing but the outline of the lithe, elegant body that teased his dreams. He was twenty feet from the stage, but as Sonny stepped out of the darkness, opened his arms, and let the rhythm of the music seep under his skin, the distance was nothing…as though Sonny was dancing only for him.
The music flowed like water, and Sonny moved with it as one, eyes closed, arms raised, hips undulating and smooth. Levi was entranced. Sonny. His strong, muscular thighs, shaped calves, and perfectly arched feet. Sonny danced alone, like he was the only soul in the world, and Levi couldn’t look away.
Thud, thud, thud.
Levi’s blood rushed in time with every pulsating contraction of Sonny’s sculpted torso. His form was perfect, as if it had been carved from ethereal marble and inscribed by seraphic spirits. In his mind, Sonny was so close he could almost taste him…could smell him and feel the potent heat of the smooth skin he’d never touched.
Kai slunk onto the stage. Sonny’s eyes opened, and his gaze became provocative and laced with a fire that rushed through the club like a blast from a furnace. He beckoned Kai to him, and they moved together, spinning an intoxicating and sinuous dance that left Levi breathless. For a moment that stretched so long Levi felt his nerves would snap, the two young dancers looked as though they would kiss—as though their lips would come together and finish the sensual game they’d started—but they didn’t. Sonny closed his eyes and danced away, leaving every soul in the club dizzy and gasping for air.
Levi watched Sonny and Kai move together with an ironic ache in his heart. Kai was the one he’d been with—the one he’d pushed his cock inside and made his own. In the heady dark of the club, he knew without doubt that his whole world was upside down.
Damn you, Sonny Valentine.
* * * *
A little while later, Levi pushed open the fire escape door and stepped outside. The night was balmy and sticky, but compared to the sweaty haze of the club, the light breeze was cooling against his overheated skin. He leaned his bare back against the wall. At some point, he would have to search out Kai and his stolen shirt, but not yet. Hunting him down would mean running into Sonny, and he wasn’t quite sure he could face that. At least, not until the calming night air reached every part of his body.
He chanced a rueful glance down at the telltale bulge in his jeans, the bulge that had appeared a heartbeat after Sonny preceded Kai onto the stage. It was official—the dude was a demon, though after his performance in Levi’s living room, he couldn’t figure why he was surprised. Hell, nothing Sonny did surprised him anymore.
His own reactions? Next question.<
br />
Frustrated, he let his eyes fall closed. An image of Sonny and Kai’s sensuous dance appeared behind his eyelids. He shook his head in an effort to disperse it, but the two beautiful young men stubbornly remained, and it was all too easy to give in and let them have their way.
He watched the scene replay in his head. Sonny and Kai had danced together for over an hour, but there was a song in particular that resonated and indelibly imprinted itself in Levi’s mind. The hard house club track was over a decade old, but it was timeless—the kind of track that would still be playing out for decades to come.
It had been playing in the very first gay bar he ever set foot in. Nineteen and fresh from coming out to his fellow jock, freshman roommate, he’d thought he knew about being gay, about what it meant to admire, appreciate, and revel in another man’s body. Turned out he didn’t know much about anything. A go-go dancer had opened his eyes to the world that freezing Pennsylvania night all those years ago. Seven years on, it seemed nothing had really changed. Perhaps he hadn’t really changed. He had, after all, been stuck in limbo for most of his adult life.
Damn. The healing stitches in his arm throbbed. He banged his head lightly against the bricks behind him, willing Sonny and Kai back to the forefront of his mind. They didn’t take much persuading. He watched them move together for a while, enjoying them both, but he was drawn to Sonny. Kai had a certain presence, all floppy hair, pouty lips, and unending long legs, but he lacked Sonny’s elegance, lacked his effortless grace. Sonny moved like the music was liquid silver in his veins.
Levi opened his eyes with a heavy sigh. It was like nothing he’d ever seen, but since when did he notice shit like that? Since when did he notice anything that wasn’t a damned red-topped bill? He pushed himself off the wall, adjusting his now comfortable jeans, and headed back inside to find his shirt.
His search led him to the dancers’ bathrooms. He picked up the abandoned shirt and retreated, stepping over the piles of personal belonging and stage props and making his way back toward the tightly packed club. It was his intention to dodge Cam and head for home.
Blue Boy 1: Bullet Page 7