No. Fucking. Way.
He kicked out. His foot connected with Rex’s abdomen and sent him flying. Sonny yelped in surprise, falling off the sofa in a heap. His labored breaths disturbed the stunned silence. Levi scrambled to his feet, hauled Sonny back onto the couch, and stood in front of him. “Enough.”
His command was directed at Rex, who stood doubled over, his eyes wild, but Levi meant it for anyone who cared to listen. The scene was over, done.
No one was touching Sonny again.
Rex charged forward, his body colliding with Levi as they met in the middle of the set. Rex was a big guy—a big angry guy—but Levi was madder, incensed with a blinding rage that turned his whole world red. Over and over, his fist connected with Rex’s face. He felt the warmth of blood seep through his fingers, but he didn’t care. Rex had attacked the only man who’d made him smile in years. The only man with a hope of seeing past the bullshit that weighed him down. To his grief-stricken mind…his heart, there was no greater sin.
Rex grappled with him, attempting to flip them over. When it didn’t work, he kicked out, catching Levi in the stomach and ribs.
It took five hits to knock the wind from Levi. He paused for breath, letting up his assault, and it was the lull the shouting voices and grasping hands needed. The next thing he knew, two heavy bodies restrained him, and Sonny was nowhere to be seen.
Chapter Thirteen
Jon slammed the office door, bracing himself against it and using his weight to propel Levi farther into the room. “Damn it, Levi. Calm the fuck down.”
Levi wrestled himself out of his grasp and took a step back. Away from the set and Rex, his anger was fading fast, but he still didn’t trust himself not to take a swing at Jon. He’d punched Rex on his ass twice before they’d been pulled apart. “Where’s Sonny?”
Jon glared at him for a moment before he turned and yanked open a drawer behind him. He pulled out a pair of sweats and tossed them across the desk. “Is that what this is about? Something going on between you two?”
“What makes you say that?” Levi took the sweats and pulled them on. Somehow, in all the chaos, he’d forgotten he was naked. Blue Boy had that effect on him. He straightened up and winced. His ribs smarted from Rex’s defensive blows.
Jon sighed and sat down, gesturing for Levi to do the same. He didn’t seem surprised when Levi remained on his feet. “You’ve never had a problem with a scene before. I know you didn’t want to bottom, and perhaps I took advantage of knowing how much you needed the cash to persuade you, but I didn’t want this. You have to know that.” He broke off for breath. In his own subtle way, he seemed as worked up as Levi. “I don’t want to see you like this.”
“Like what?”
The door opened. Cam slipped inside. “Okay in here?”
Jon spared him a brief glance. Levi didn’t miss the intensity that passed between them. “Look, if this is about Sonny, then trust me, I get it. It’s hard to see someone you care about with somebody else, but you can’t lash out like this. If you can’t deal with it, you can’t be here.”
“Then maybe I shouldn’t be here.”
Levi strode from the room before Jon could respond.
He drifted to the dressing room to retrieve his things. On his way, he encountered no one. The studio was silent and still, the only sign of the brawl some scattered sofa cushions and an upturned chair. Even the showers were deserted, though that was unsurprising. The three-way made up the whole schedule for the day, and had ended in violence long before anyone had worked up a sweat.
Still, Levi had no desire to linger. He grabbed his bag and left the studio without even stopping to pull on a shirt. He crossed the parking lot to his car, opened the door, and threw his bag in the back. In his peripheral vision, he saw a lone figure sitting at the bus stop across the street.
Sonny.
He felt a strange ache in his chest at the sight of him slumped on the bench with his head in his hands, a pull he couldn’t ignore. He snagged a shirt from his bag and crossed the street. “Hey.” Sonny didn’t look up. Levi reached out and touched his shoulder. “Need a ride?”
Sonny raised his head and squinted through the bright afternoon sun. “From you?”
“Might as well. I’m going your way.”
Sonny’s only reply was a noncommittal grunt. Levi sighed and patted his pockets for his cell phone. It took him a minute to remember he’d left it on Bella’s table. “Look, I’m sorry about today, okay? I wasn’t in a good place, and it got out of hand. I’m sorry you got caught in the middle.”
Sonny nodded. “That’s why you did it? Why you went for Rex? Because you were having a bad day?”
“I guess.”
Sonny let out a short, humorless snort of laughter. “Leave me alone.”
“No.” Levi folded his arms across his chest. “You’ve been all up in my shit for weeks. You don’t get to decide.”
“Yeah, well. Maybe I didn’t even want to be. Maybe Cam told me to. Thought about that?”
“Cam?”
“Why do you think I came after you in the first place?”
“You said you wanted to know who was fucking you.”
“Maybe I lied. What do you want from me, Levi?”
“I want to drive you home.”
Sonny was as stubborn as Levi, maybe even more. Levi knew he was close to toppling the final invisible barrier between them, but he sensed that Sonny needed something from him. Something, anything, to convince him the crazy heat between them was real.
He stepped closer and took Sonny’s hands. “Please?”
They drove to Sonny’s apartment in silence. Levi welcomed it, though he was used to Sonny talking his ear off. His body ached, and his brain felt fried. He needed a few quiet moments to bring the shattered pieces of his mind back together.
He pulled up outside Sonny’s apartment block and shut the engine off. Sonny tore his gaze from the window and let out a heavy sigh. “I don’t get it. I know you didn’t want to do the scene, but I had no idea you were so upset by it.”
Levi retrieved his faithful pack of Marlboro Lights from the glove box. He lit up and blew smoke out of his open window. “I’m not upset.”
Sonny plucked the cigarette from his mouth and took a deep drag of his own. “I don’t believe you.” His voice was tired. For the first time, Levi noticed the line of exhaustion in his young face, like he was the one who hadn’t slept in days. “You’re an asshole, but you’re not a violent asshole.”
“I put you up against the wall the first time you came to my house,” Levi reminded him.
A ghost of a grin flickered across Sonny’s features. “That was because you wanted me.”
Levi let that go. He couldn’t explain any of the reactions he had to Sonny, let alone that one. He turned away and stared through the windshield. A part of him wanted to tell Sonny about his momma, but he couldn’t find the words. He’d dealt with Bella by himself for so long it seemed fitting that he dealt with her death on his own. He hadn’t even told AJ.
“Well, as fun as this is, I’m beat.” Sonny moved to get out of the car. He paused with his hand on the door. “My apartment is number twenty-four if you change your mind.”
“About what?”
Sonny shook his head. “About letting go of whatever’s tearing you up. You don’t need to be on your own, Levi. I don’t know why I give a shit, but I do. I’ll be here if you change your mind.”
He slid out of the car and walked away before Levi could formulate a response.
* * * *
Levi drove home, tired beyond belief but unnervingly wired. His apartment was cool and quiet, something he loved, craved, when he was elsewhere and surrounded by heat and noise, but just then he found it suffocating. He felt restless and agitated.
After a long shower and some clean clothes, he opened the refrigerator and stared. Seeing nothing of interest, he let it swing shut, only to lower his standards and open it again. This time he reached for san
dwich fixings and threw together the first plate of food he’d seen in days. It tasted like cardboard, but he forced half of it down before admitting defeat and dumping it in the trash.
The rest of the evening followed a similar pattern. It was Saturday night, and he had nothing to do until an appointment at the funeral home on Monday morning. He thought about calling Cam, or AJ, or even going down to the garage and finishing up some overdue jobs. But he didn’t. Instead he sat on the sofa and stared at the blank screen of his TV.
He fell asleep sometime after midnight, his mind still in bits. His dreams were fragmented, flipping between alternating images of Bella’s broken body and Sonny’s beautifully weary face. Though some part of his unconscious mind knew he was asleep, that they weren’t real, he felt powerless to stop the carnage when they merged, and it was Sonny who was battered beyond repair and dying in his arms. Sonny who was gone forever.
“I’ll be here if you change your mind…”
He woke with a strangled gasp, rolling off the couch. The wooden floor was hard against his knees, but he didn’t feel the jarring impact. He stumbled to his feet and to the front door, taking the stairs two at a time until he burst out into the fresh air of the street.
The three-block jog to Sonny’s apartment passed in a blur, and he found himself, shirtless and barefoot, outside the right door before he knew what he was doing. He knocked. Sonny opened the door, rubbing his eyes. Levi cast his hand aside, grabbed his face, and kissed him.
Sonny let out a grunt of surprise, but he responded without resistance, opening his mouth for Levi’s tongue and pulling him inside.
Levi kicked the door shut. The loud slam echoed in the dark silence of Sonny’s apartment, but he paid it no heed. He backed Sonny into the opposite wall, kissing him like a man possessed. Though he’d had more sexual encounters this year alone than he could remember, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d kissed a man. It had been years.
He let his hands roam Sonny’s body. Like him, Sonny was shirtless, dressed only in a well-worn pair of sleep pants. Smooth, warm skin met Levi’s curious touch. He’d started this on set all those hours ago. Now he wanted to finish it, explore every inch of Sonny he could reach.
Sonny pulled away, his eyes wild. “What do you want from me?”
“I want you to fuck me.” The words tumbled out before he could stop them, before he could stop to reconcile what he was asking for, but he meant them. He wanted Sonny more than he’d ever wanted anyone, wanted to feel him, to be consumed by him.
Sonny stared at him, panting, then held out his hand. “Come to bed with me.”
Levi took his hand without hesitation and let Sonny lead him through his cluttered apartment to his bedroom. The room mirrored the rest of his apartment—clean but messy, like a whirlwind regularly passed through. Books and clothes littered the dresser and floors. Beyond the bed, a well-loved guitar took pride of place on the window ledge. Levi scanned the textbook titles, all of them related to psychology. No wonder he gets along with Cam. It seemed Levi was doomed to spend his time with some kind of wannabe shrink.
Sonny sank his teeth into Levi's bare back. “Come here.”
He tugged Levi to the bed without waiting for an answer and pushed him down. Levi sat on the edge and leaned back on his elbows. The sheets were still warm where Sonny had been sleeping before Levi had woken him, and a sliver of moonlight peeked through the closed blinds. He wanted to feel bad for disturbing Sonny, but he didn’t.
Sonny eyed him like he wanted to say something. Levi beckoned him forward and pulled Sonny down on top of him. He didn’t want to talk, least of all about this. It seemed that this was something they’d talked about enough, albeit in a totally different context.
He kissed Sonny, holding him tight by the back of his head. Sonny’s skin was intoxicating, and Levi made the most of it, so soft and warm beneath his fingertips and against his chest. He shifted his weight, eager to get Sonny out of his sleep pants. Easy enough, but his own jeans were more problematic.
Sonny growled, frustrated. Levi felt Sonny’s dick, hard against his still-clothed thigh, felt him tremble in his arms, and a slow fire began to smolder in his belly. He lifted his hips. Sonny ripped his jeans down his legs and tossed them over his shoulder before he could blink. In some distant part of his mind he’d expected some resistance from Sonny, perhaps even feared rejection, but there was none, and he’d never felt so wanted.
They kissed again. Levi’s lips felt swollen and bruised, his skin felt rubbed raw by the addictive stubble on Sonny’s jaw, but he couldn’t get enough. He flipped Sonny over, his palms falling either side of Sonny’s head, and sucked at the juncture between his neck and shoulder, hard enough to leave a mark.
Sonny writhed beneath him, groaning and raking his nails down Levi's back. “Thought you wanted me to fuck you? Keep going like that, and it’ll be the other way round.
He had a point. Levi wanted to fuck him, badly, but not as much as he craved the unknown feeling of having Sonny inside him. He rolled over again, letting Sonny take the lead. Sonny kissed him hard before he pulled back, his chest heaving. “Get in the bed. I want to do this properly.”
Levi chuckled, amused, but Sonny’s expression was earnest, so he did as he was told and folded his body into the bed to lie on his side, his head propped up on one arm. Sonny slipped in beside him and turned to face him. “I don’t want this to be like anything you’ve ever done before.”
“Nothing you do to me is like anything I’ve ever done before.”
Sonny smiled and reached over him to the nightstand. He tossed a bottle of lube and some condoms on the pillow between them. Levi eyed the lube warily as Sonny squeezed some onto his fingers. Sonny caught Levi's face in his clean hand. “I’m not going to hurt you.”
Sonny stared for a moment, then let go and trailed his hand down Levi’s body. Levi shivered, goose bumps covering his skin as Sonny’s devilish fingers grazed his abdomen, trailing lower and lower until he took hold of his cock.
Levi looked down, fascinated by the sight of Sonny working him over, and by the sight of Sonny’s cock, rock hard and leaking. He longed to take Sonny in his mouth again, but he knew he couldn’t, not now. He was at Sonny’s mercy, the way he somehow knew he always had been.
Sonny lifted Levi’s leg and slipped a slick finger into him. Levi’s breath caught. Sonny’s fingers were slimmer than his, but they were sure of their path. One finger quickly became two, and then three, stretching him so gently that instead of squirming in pain, he burned—burned with a pleasure so hot he wanted to scream.
He arched his back, pulling Sonny to him and crashing their lips together in a desperate, bruising kiss. Sonny groaned and pushed hard against his chest, forcing him onto his back. He broke away, panting. “Are you ready?”
Levi couldn’t see his face in the faint light, but he was sure of his answer, so fucking sure. “Do it.”
The tear of the condom wrapper punctuated the eerie quiet of the night. Levi reached out and took it, rolling it onto Sonny with steady hands. Sonny let out a shaky breath and lifted Levi’s legs, opening them—opening him. He positioned his cock somewhere Levi couldn’t see and paused, staring at him, like he was waiting for a last-minute rejection. Then the moment passed, and all Levi could see were blinding white lights as Sonny pushed into him.
It hurt. There was no denying it, but it was the best kind of pain, the kind of pain that inspired and exhilarated a man. Levi let out a long, low moan. “Fuck.”
Sonny rubbed a soothing hand over his clenched muscles, smoothing them out one by one. “Breathe. It’ll fade, I promise.”
Levi shook his head. He didn’t want it to fade, didn’t want it to ebb away into nothing. He liked the pain, needed it. “I want to feel you.”
Somehow, Sonny knew what he meant, knew what he needed. He brought his hands up to the headboard and braced himself, rolling his hips in a long, slow circle. Sweat glistened on his beautiful skin as he lowered his lips
to Levi’s ear. “Feel that, Levi? Feel it all. This is what it’s supposed to be. This is what’s real.”
Levi closed his eyes, giving himself over as Sonny moved inside him, steady and sure, like the beat of a drum, then faster, deeper and harder, until the tattoo of stampeding pleasure became too much to bear. Or so he thought, until Sonny lithely folded his body in two and took Levi's cock in his mouth.
Levi's eyes flew open, and he gasped in a harsh breath. Sucking and fucking? Is he kidding me?
Levi was done. He arched his back and yelled out, pounding his fist into the mattress. His climax ripped through him, roaring through his body, leaving no nerve untouched. Sonny swallowed around him, teasing him with his tongue until he was utterly spent and could take no more.
Sonny released him, dropping his head to Levi’s chest. “Oh God, oh God.”
Levi dug his fingers into Sonny's shoulders and wrapped his legs tight around him. “Keep fucking me,” he said hoarsely. “I wanna see you come.”
It didn’t take much. Levi gritted his teeth through the aftershocks as Sonny picked up the pace again. Dirty grunts became groans, then desperate moans as he chased his own orgasm. Levi moaned too, clawing at Sonny, the bed, the headboard above him, desperate for anything to brace against the rapid thrust of Sonny’s hips.
A violent shudder ran through Sonny, and he stilled. Levi held him close, felt the jolts of energy run through him, felt the pulse of his cock as he filled the condom. Levi felt everything, and the residual pleasure was so intense he could’ve wept.
Maybe he did.
Sonny rolled to the side, taking Levi with him and wrapping him in a tight embrace. Levi opened his mouth to speak, though to say what, he wasn’t quite sure, and nothing but a strangled moan came out.
“Shh.” Sonny pressed his lips to the side of Levi's face. “It’s okay. Let it go.”
Sometime later, Levi woke to find Sonny staring at him, tracing the healed cuts and fresh bruises on Levi's body with the pad of his finger. Something in Sonny’s face bothered him. He forced his scratchy eyes open. “What’s up?”
Blue Boy 1: Bullet Page 10