She felt the current tug the boat in one direction, making her work harder to go the other. Wasn’t that what was happening to her now? Fighting a current she couldn’t see to a place she couldn’t guess? You’ve laid out events I could never have imagined. I used to be able to trust You in that. How do I learn to trust You for the rest of this? The more JJ thought about it, trust wasn’t really a skill one could learn. You either trusted your team in the army or you didn’t; it was a choice. I could choose to trust You, couldn’t I? I love Max and want what’s best for him. I know I’m in Gordon Falls for a reason—at least for now. And I love Alex, but his life is elsewhere.
She laughed at her declaration. Didn’t God already know all this? Hadn’t He known the whole time—even before she’d realized she loved Alex Cushman? Suddenly, out of nowhere, her brain recalled the favorite saying of the army chaplain that had helped her grieve for Angie Carlisle: “Pray for calm but row for shore.” Ridiculous advice to give a distraught woman in the middle of a desert, but she knew what it meant: do what you can where you are and trust God with the rest.
She was a firefighter here in Gordon Falls. She was Max’s sister. She was a woman in love with Alex Cushman. God would have to take all that and make calm. She would have to row for shore.
* * *
Alex had to give Max one thing: the guy had a natural flare for the dramatic. His email said it all, point blank: “No. I’m staying here.”
If it had been a piece of paper, Alex would have crumpled it up and thrown it against the wall. As it was, all he could do was slam down the lid of his laptop hard enough to make Doc look up from the harness he was testing. “No,” he growled, standing up to pace behind his desk. Failure wasn’t the kind of thing that could just be walked off like a leg cramp, but he couldn’t sit still while the weight of this crashed down on him.
“No, what?” Doc’s face showed the question to be unnecessary, more like a last-ditch hope that the decline was for something else.
“Max turned me down. He’s going to stay in Chicago and sue us into oblivion.” That was overdramatic, but he wasn’t feeling reasonable right now. “I know he should be on our team. I know we could do great things if we could just get him out here.”
“So you know just what will fix Max Jones’s life, do you?” Doc’s raised eyebrow poked an annoying hole in Alex’s conscience.
“Yes! No. I mean, I feel it—that it’s right. I’ve never had an idea plant itself in my head with more certainty. This is the answer.”
Doc put down the tool he was using. “This is your answer. Max just gave you his.”
Alex knew Doc was right, but the failure of it all seemed to choke him right now. He wanted to push back, to argue with Doc, but found he couldn’t. “It’s just that there’s no solution now. Everybody loses.” Everybody loses. The words clanged around his head like a loose gear.
“Everybody loses what, exactly?”
“Everybody loses...everything. We lose Adventure Gear, Max loses a chance at a new career, we lose the chance to make this right, you probably lose your job, I’ve already lost Sam...” Alex glared at Doc. “Want me to go on?”
Doc sat back against his worktable. “As a matter of fact, I do. You’re missing something important on that list.”
Alex shot the Italian his darkest “I’m in no mood to play games” glare.
Doc sighed. “What does your Josephine lose? You are making this all about Max, and that’s wrong. A lot of it is about Max Jones—as it should be—but it also has to be about you. And about you and your Josephine.”
Alex felt his jaw drop. “When in the world did you start calling her Josephine?”
Doc shook his head. “Americans. You take a lovely name like Josephine and you chop it up into letters. I cannot call a beautiful woman JJ. How can you call the woman you care about by such a thing?”
Alex fought the urge to snarl, “You’re kidding me, right?” but it was useless to have such arguments with Doc. He was who he was. Instead, Alex wiped his hands down his face and said, “The beautiful woman in question likes to be called JJ and doesn’t like to be called Josephine, that’s why.”
“I asked what JJ stood for and she told me. I asked her permission to use such a beautiful name for a beautiful woman and she said that I could.”
Doc’s smug smile sank into Alex’s gut. “Sure, when you put it that way.”
Doc picked his tool back up. “Which I did. And you have not answered my question. Yes, you’ve lost Samuel, but that would have happened in any case. What do you lose now?”
Alex’s brain kept shouting “everything,” but he forced his thoughts past the frustration to reach for the answer. “JJ,” he said finally, sinking into his chair. “I think I lose JJ. I know she would have come to Denver with Max, or I could have persuaded her to come eventually. But now I don’t think she will. I’m not sure I could ask her to.”
Doc twisted a piece of harness, trimming one end. “Do you believe Max is the only man who could do this job?”
Alex had to think. “I believe he is the man for the job. He is the man who is supposed to have the job. But could someone else fill that role? Doc, I have no idea. It’s supposed to be Max. I can’t explain it any other way.”
“And Max will not come to Denver.”
Alex spun in his desk chair, wanting this conversation to be over. “Nope.”
“And your Josephine, she will not come to Denver.”
“Not without Max, and maybe not at all.” What, was Doc determined to make him repeat all the day’s worst news?
“And there is no solution.”
“Not that I can see.” Alex wanted to bang his head on the desk.
“Then you are not the Alexander I know.” Doc started to laugh, which just doubled Alex’s annoyance. “Finding solutions where no one else could was always your gift. And now I can see the solution and you cannot? The world has become a funny place.”
“What?” Doc only laughed, which made Alex want to tromp over there and take his tools away until the infuriating Italian quit his guessing games. “What?”
Doc silently went back to work. What’s worse, he started to whistle.
“You are the most...” Alex simply grabbed his car keys before he said something he’d regret. “I’m out of here. It’s been a bad enough day already without you adding to it.”
Alex stomped from the room, stalking down the hall in a wave of fury and frustration. He was almost to the front door when it hit him like an avalanche. It was so simple, so drastic, so obvious, Alex couldn’t fathom how he’d missed it. He turned around so fast he nearly fell over, and sprinted back to yank the office door open with so much force it banged into the wall. Alex darted over to Doc’s worktable and planted his hands atop the rigging. “Move.”
Doc looked up as if nothing unusual had just happened.
“If JJ and Max won’t come to Adventure Access, I’ll take Adventure Access to them. We’ll move the whole shebang to Chicago, or Gordon Falls or wherever near there that fits. Everybody wins.”
Doc offered a tilted smile. “Not everyone.”
“You wouldn’t come? You have to come. I think I can do this without Sam, but I know I can’t do this without you.”
“I’ll come. But only if you move for you, or for her and not lay everything at that poor young man’s feet. Your life is not his to save, even if you think you’re saving his.”
It would have been the most pretentious, overly dramatic thing to say—had it not been absolutely right. Still, that was Doc. He always knew what was truly wrong, even when no one else could see it.
Alex grabbed the dear man by his shoulder. “Doc, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a plane to catch.”
Doc’s smile filled the room. “You always do.”
* * *
The engine pulled into the bay and JJ swung down off her position, tired and sweaty. The garage fire had been stubborn, but the brigade had worked together well to contain it. The
past two calls proved she’d become a member of the team. As she undid the fastenings on her bunker coat, Wally nudged her shoulder and pointed. “What’s with him again?”
“Who?” JJ turned to see Alex standing in the wide driveway. Her heart did a teenager-worthy flip at the sight of him. Max had declared his decision, and now she didn’t know what lay ahead for her and Alex. Something in his eyes, however, told her he’d come up with something—Alex was practically buzzing with excitement. Despite the grime and her cumbersome gear, JJ walked over to where he was.
“You’re beautiful.” The truth was she smelled like smoke and gasoline and two hours of exertion, not to mention her sweaty hair and sooty everything. Not the standard definition of beauty by any means, but Alex’s eyes displayed a full-out smitten adoration that made her cheeks redden.
“You’re here.” Would this be how it went from now on? Stretches of settling in while missing him punctuated by sudden appearances that would startle her heart?
“I’m here. I need to talk to you.”
JJ shucked out of the thick coat. “I can’t change Max’s mind. I’ve tried.” She had. Half of her truly wanted Alex’s plan to work out, to transplant Max into a new life and all of them to Denver. The other half recognized how much Gordon Falls already meant to him and was coming to mean for her. Max was finally thinking of one place as home, and that was worth so much. She just didn’t know if it was worth losing her chance with Alex.
“It’s not about Max.” He shrugged. “Okay, maybe it’s a bit about Max, but not really. That doesn’t make any sense, does it?” He shut his eyes for a second. “How fast can you get out of here?”
“Not fast. The shift’s almost over but we’ve got to clean up and there’s paperwork and...”
Chief Bradens appeared behind her from out of nowhere. “And I think we can have her out of here in ten minutes unless she has to put on makeup and do her hair, which will cost you another thirty.”
JJ spun around. “Chief, I...”
He smirked. “So I’m a softy. Deal with it. The guy bought us doughnuts. And pizza.”
She gaped at her boss, unable to come up with the right answer for the situation. In response, he merely checked his watch, gave Alex an exaggerated wink and walked away. JJ took one last look over her shoulder, held up one hand to Alex and managed to choke out, “I’ll be back in fifteen.
“Ten,” he countered, absurdly impatient.
“Fifteen.” She held her ground. “I need a shower.”
When she returned after the fastest postincineration shower in GFVFD history, Alex hadn’t moved from his spot in the driveway. The guys found this hilarious and made all kinds of comments to her as she walked out of the bay to meet him, at which point Alex greeted her with an enormous kiss despite—or perhaps because of—the raucous audience. Whistles and whoops and one call of “Way to go, doughnut man!” echoed in the large engine bay behind her until JJ was sure she was the color of the truck.
“Can we get out of here now?” She laughed into his neck when he wouldn’t stop covering her in small kisses. It startled her—in the nicest of ways—how she could let him be so affectionate given the totally uncertain nature of their relationship. Maybe because he exuded certainty, that solidness of purpose that made him able to launch companies out of disasters. With or without Max, she had no doubt Alex Cushman would turn Adventure Access into something the world had never seen before.
Alex walked quickly, trying hard to hold in whatever it was he came to say. His passion for life, his vitality, seeped into her whenever they were together. Maybe that was why she missed him so much when he was gone. In half a block his impatience got the best of him and he turned to take her by both shoulders. “I’m moving here. I’m going to pick up the pieces of what used to be AG and move the whole operation here.”
“But...”
“There is no AG or Adventure Access without me. And there is no me without you. It’s so simple I don’t know how I couldn’t see it earlier.”
“Because it’s not so simple. All those people, all those jobs you were trying to save...”
“The ones who matter will come along. And we’ll partner with the rehabilitation hospital for others. I built a company from the ground up in Denver, so I can build one in Chicago. Or right here. Or someplace in between. Because you belong here and I, well, I used to belong everywhere in the world but now I only belong in one place. And that’s here with you.”
JJ tried to take in the enormity of what he was saying. “You’re moving your company here to be with me.”
“Unless you know some way to pick up all of Gordon Falls and move it to Denver. But that wouldn’t work either because I need it to be here. I need to be here. I can’t guarantee I won’t have to travel now and—”
She cut him off with a kiss that let loose her whole heart for the first time in her life. Her whole, healed heart. Tony Daxon had been wrong; she wouldn’t have to choose where her loyalties lay. God had given her a whole, healed life where, in true Alex Cushman fashion, everybody won.
“Wow,” Alex exclaimed softly, no less stunned than she. “If I had known a little relocation would bring that out in you, I’d have moved a month ago.”
JJ let her head fall against his shoulder. “No, you wouldn’t have. Not until you were sure you’d found the solution. That’s what I love about you, Alex—you never give up.”
He brought her hand up and kissed it. A grandly elegant gesture to a woman in jeans, wet hair and a GFVFD T-shirt. “I couldn’t give up on us. Even if I wanted to—which I absolutely did not. It just took me a while to work it all out. If there’s anyone who doesn’t give up, it’s God trying to get an idea through my thick skull.”
She turned her head to look up into his eyes. How perfect it felt to be in his arms. How safe and whole. “Speaking of thick skulls, what about Max?”
“I’m hoping he’ll say yes now that he can stay here.” He sighed. “I really think he’s the guy to bring into Adventure Access. We’ll still stand by any settlement that comes down, regardless, but I still think we have more than just money to offer him. I’ve decided it might be best to trust that God has someone else in mind if Max says no.” Alex put his arm around JJ’s shoulder and began walking with something close to a swagger. “Who knows? Maybe he’s not quite ready for a family business. Studies show it takes a certain personality to work with relatives, and I know how badly it can turn sour.”
JJ stopped walking and stared at him. Did he just say what she thought he’d said? “Relatives?”
“Well, in six months when we’re ready to take Max on, I figure you’ll definitely have succumbed to my legendary charms and said yes.”
Every ounce of calm left her body. “Yes to what?”
His smile was nothing short of gleaming. “You don’t think I’m going to let you in on that now, do you? These things take time to do well. An Amazonian chief once told me I was a veritable fountain of patience.”
JJ applied a mock scowl. “And some chief once told you that you had the soul of a monkey. I didn’t believe that, either.”
Alex started walking, chin up, smug as could be. “Nope. No spoilers. But you’re smart, so you can guess what it might be. You’ll never get it out of me until the time is right.”
JJ caught him by the arm and kissed him for all she was worth. For all he was worth. For all the two of them could do together, right here in Gordon Falls. She took no small amount of pride in rendering him momentarily speechless.
“Wow,” he said, his voice gruff. “Maybe you will get it out of me sooner than that.”
She chuckled, loving how light the world felt right now. “Can I be the one to tell Max?”
That surprised him. “You? Really?”
“Well, the two of us together. I want the chance to give him some happy news. And even though you are Mr. Persuasion, I think maybe I can help him see how good Adventure Access would be for him.”
“I imagine you could.” His
smile made her heart pound. “I love you, you know that?”
“I love you back.” And this time, it didn’t feel at all wrong to put it that way.
Epilogue
The antique paddle wheel steamboat was decked out almost beyond recognition in white-and-red bunting. Alex stood at the edge of the dock trying to breathe. In seconds, JJ would come down the path and join him and the guests gathered there. They’d board the boat as Alex and JJ, but they’d step off as Mr. and Mrs. Alexander Cushman.
He loved that JJ insisted they get married on the river, even though the late April date made for risky weather. God had smiled on their plans—today was clear and bright with just the perfect bit of briskness. Doc put a hand on Alex’s shoulder as the sound of sirens echoed across the way. The Gordon Falls Volunteer Fire Department had insisted on delivering JJ to the wedding in dramatic style.
The gathered guests broke out in applause as a fire truck, decked out as ceremoniously as the boat, pulled into view. He caught a glimpse of white fluff inside the cab and he saw a wave of JJ’s hand, but nothing prepared him for the vision of her stepping out onto the path. His bride was breathtaking. No vista on earth could compare to the sight of her standing there in the brilliant April sunshine, smiling at him for all the world to see.
A second later, Max rolled up beside JJ, and she placed her hand on the back of his chair just as tenderly as any bride takes her father’s elbow. Max cut a pretty fine figure in his tux, not to mention the pinstripes done up on his wheels for the occasion. One of his first projects at Adventure Access had been a series of customizable wheel placards for the company’s off-road wheelchair line. “Maxing out” had become a company catchphrase for tricking out equipment, and Alex couldn’t have been happier to adopt the term.
“Ready to welcome your bride aboard?” Pastor Allen said with a wide smile.
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