by Tee, Marian
He had listened when Michael said he loved me. He had heard my answer and when I tried reading his mind, I learned that half of him believed it was true.
“Are you all right, Deli?”
I wanted to cry again. If my tears had a voice, they would have probably told me I was abusing our friendship. Surely, I couldn’t cry over every single thing Lucian did?
“Why did you keep on thinking about Michael and me kissing?”
“Mental self-flagellation,” he replied without hesitation.
I knew a lot of big words, thanks to Davie, but that one completely escaped me. “Right.” I vowed to look it up in the dictionary as soon as possible.
“I know it’s not much, but suffering somehow makes me feel I could atone for the pain I’ve caused you, even just a little.”
I understood him better this time and I said sharply, guiltily, “You didn’t have to watch.”
“Yes. I did.”
We remained silent for a while before Lucian asked again, “Are you all right?”
“I’m coping.”
“I love you.”
The words came out of the blue and I went cold. “Don’t say that.”
“It’s the truth. I’m done hiding from the truth. You and I are alike in more ways than you think. You ignore the truth because you fear it. I ignore it because I’m arrogant, and I tell myself I don’t need to know the truth, that I don’t need anything because I’ve done well living by myself all these years.”
“Well…I’m glad to help.” I couldn’t quite hide my bitterness.
“You could help more if you came back—”
“No.”
“Promise me you’ll call for me when you need me.”
“If,” I corrected, “I need you.”
“Very well, then. If ever you do happen to need my help, I want you to promise me you’ll ask for it. I can’t let you go if I don’t think you’re safe.”
“Stop pretending like you really care.”
“But I do.” Lucian’s voice lowered. “You have to believe—”
“You know what’s funny? Now that I know the truth about…about this thing we have with our minds, it just made me see things clearly. Before, I never thought of questioning why you loved me. I just thought you did and that’s all that mattered. But I should have. Because now, I’m trying to think of one reason—any reason, dammit—that you’d fall in love me and I can’t!” My voiced cracked at the humiliating truth.
“Maybe it was fate.”
“Yeah, right.”
“I wasn’t looking for love, but there was something about you that instantly drew me. I remember how my pulse raced for no reason the first time I saw—”
“Oh, please,” I snarled. “Don’t tell me you’re going to say it’s serendipity?”
“What else could it be? You’re the very opposite of my ideal woman.”
“Thanks a lot!”
“I turned you into one of us simply to save your life. But then I got to hear your voice. Your real voice, your real thoughts, and I couldn’t get enough of it. The more I listened, the more I knew about you, the more I fell in love with you. I tried not to…I tried everything to push you away—”
“And you succeeded,” I finished, not wanting to remember, much less relive, the past.
Sadness and regret mingled in his tone when he asked, “Do you remember the time you asked The Voice—”
“You mean, I asked you,” I pointed out flatly.
I had reconnected with his mind and he had let me. He flinched at my words but it didn’t make him pause. “Do you remember the time you asked me if I considered you the person I care for the most in the world?”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “Don’t you dare, Lucian,” I screeched at him.
But he ignored my words and doggedly continued, his voice hoarse, “I meant it then, and I mean it now. You are the person I care for—”
I cut him out again, and I opened my eyes just in time to see myself flying straight into a tree.
“Oh, dear,” I said out loud.
And, through my thoughts, Lucian realized what was about to happen and groaned, “Deli—”
I slammed into its trunk. The tree shook at the impact of my crash, showering the people underneath us with dozens of loose, dry leaves. I bit back a painful groan, rubbing my head as I struggled to stay afloat.
“Deli.” Lucian’s voice was exasperated and resigned at the same time.
And then he and I were laughing like old times because it had been a silly thing for me to allow and yet, it had also been so typical of me.
My smile faded.
Typical because I was stupid—
“Stop it, Deli. You’re not stupid and you know it.”
“No. I’m stupid and, yes, I know it.”
“Naïve, innocent, occasionally foolish, yes, delightfully silly, but not stupid, and before you even think about it, they aren’t euphemisms for what I truly think about you because they’re the truth.”
I ignored the jolt of pleasure I experienced when Lucian described me as “delightfully silly.” Don’t you let yourself be swept away. He’s just telling you that because he’s guilty.
I told him waspishly, “I don’t know what euphemism means but whatever it is, I don’t believe you.”
Lucian was silent and then he sighed in my head, “Ah, Deli.”
It was so achingly familiar I wanted to cry again. But I didn’t want to waste any more of my tears on him, so I ruthlessly held them back. I slowly lowered myself to the ground, materializing to view behind a tree when I was sure no one was watching.
I looked around and knew right away I was in Central Park.
A Korean couple was enjoying a ride in a horse-drawn carriage, their cameras clicking endlessly. Children were shouting and laughing from the playground to my left, one of the many located in the park. Couples stood hand in hand while gazing at the panoramic Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis Reservoir.
For a tiny fraction of time, I forgot about being brokenhearted and became excited at the thought of the many different and better ways I could enjoy Central Park now that I was Evren, capable of flying, turning invisible, and breathing fire.
Little growls from my stomach interrupted my long-term planning. I was hungry again. No surprise there, considering I was unused to flying and being invisible for such long hours. I still had no money and I decided I’d make a collect call to Dyvian later on for a loan.
“Get out of my mind now,” I told Lucian, still sensing the vibration his mental presence was exuding. “I’m done talking to you.”
“I’m not.”
Oh, God, he sounded like a doctor again and it was just one of the thousand things I missed about him.
“Well, I am so I’m cutting this—”
“One last thing.”
I hesitated. “What?”
“I know I’ve hurt you and I know you might never forgive me for it. But I want you to know you’ll always have a home with Dyvian and me.”
He struggled for breath. “And if you don’t want me to talk about…about what happened then I won’t. You can lead your life the way you want to, and I won’t stand in your way.
Do you understand what I’m telling you, Deli?”
“Umm…”
He laughed, but there was something sad about it. “I’m saying if you come back and you happen to be in love with someone else, I’m willing to stand aside. I can be just your brother, your friend, or even a stranger if that’s how you prefer things to be between us. All I care about is for you to be happy and safe, Deli. Keep that in mind, will you?”
And then he was gone, Lucian severing the line between us himself.
“Idiot,” I muttered and burst into tears.
Didn’t he know he had me at hello? Well, okay, he had me at the time he called me human. How could I even stay mad when he said such lovely, weird things? And it was weird. I could never say the same. I was just too selfish. I wanted Lucian, and I
wanted him loving me and no one else.
But there were still a lot of things we had to talk about to clear the air properly between us.
“So that’s it.” I said the words out loud. “It’s time to go back home.”
I turned around and there was no time for me to blink before someone had covered my face with a slightly wet hanky, filling my nostrils with a bland, unidentified scent.
The last thing that broke through my consciousness was a long, rasping hiss.
Zekans again.
Chapter Sixteen
I hadn’t been sure if it was an Evren thing, but I had noticed how I kept waking up in the weirdest situations. I wondered if my immortality would allow me to stave off sleep forever. If it could, my life might have taken a better turn. It had been a silly wish, but I tended to grasp at straws when I was alone, heartbroken, and kidnapped.
I woke up shivering.
It took an awful amount of energy to open my eyes. My teeth couldn’t stop chattering. I looked around and dozens of mirror images stared back at me from all directions. I was gagged and trussed up in a chair, hands tied behind my back, and rows of rope curled tightly around my feet.
Blocks of ice surrounded me from all corners, practically serving as wallpaper from ceiling to floor. Even the ground was encased in ice, and I could only marvel how much it cost my Zekan captors to have an entire warehouse outfitted like this.
The murder industry must be booming.
With no viable source of heat, I was as weak as a newborn kitten. Maybe weaker, because I didn’t even have claws to scratch some snake eyes out. In my current surroundings, it would be near impossible to acquire enough power to turn invisible. And if I did succeed, I’d have to bide my time because I wouldn’t be able to stay invisible for long.
I remained still in my chair, doing my best not to draw attention. I surveyed my surroundings under my lashes. My heart sank at what I saw. There was only one possible exit—a sixty-foot-tall remote-controlled gate. Measuring the distance, and taking into account my weakened state, I guessed it would take probably half a minute for me just to get there.
Could I stay invisible that long? And how could I have the gate opened without alerting them?
The entire place was swarming with Zekans. No surprise there. I tried to estimate how many of them there were. Eighty? A hundred? They were also heavily armed, and I wasn’t just talking about poisonous fangs and striking tongues but real weapons. Rifles over their shoulders, pistols hanging from their belts, and knives strapped around their legs. And these were only the weapons I could see.
“Lucian.”
“Deli?”
“Look,” I urged and shared what I saw with him.
There was one moment of silence before Lucian sighed. “What have you gotten yourself into?”
“This is my fault?”
“Do you know where you are?”
“No. I think I was drugged. I can’t remember getting here.”
I gauged my location based on my hunger pangs. “But I’m pretty sure we’re still in New York. How did they know where to find me, Lucian?”
“Our enemy’s cleverer than I believed him to be. I’ve underestimated him. I’m sorry, Deli. I won’t make the same mistake—”
“It’s not your fault. We really have to talk about this guilt and inferiority complex of yours one day. But right now I want to know how they could have possibly known I’d be in Central Park.”
“I think they had all your favorite places guarded. They knew if you came back to New York, you were sure to visit places dear to you.”
Drat. I wanted to kick myself for falling for their trap.
“You’re not to blame. I’m the one—”
“Who has a million things to worry about while I have only myself to take care of and I still failed.”
“If it’s any consolation, I still love you.” Although Lucian’s voice was light, it was also underlined by sincerity, something I tried my best to ignore. Things were not going to be okay just because he was telling me stupid stuff.
“No, it’s not,” I told him even as my face heated and I became warm all over. I hoped he didn’t see how his words affected me.
“Actually, Deli, our minds are still connected—”
I dropped my head, closed my eyes, and tried not to groan in embarrassment.
“Our little prisoner is awake, I see.”
“Company,” I told him as my stomach churned in fear.
“Deli.” Lucian’s anxious growl was so loud it took all my power not to wince. “What’s happening?”
Knowing Lucian would see whatever I saw, I slowly lifted my head, then gagged right after when I beheld the monster before me.
Lucian cursed in my mind. “I know him. He’s one of the top officials of the Zekans. Stay calm and don’t provoke him. I’m on my way. I’ve an idea.”
“No, don’t come—” A violent slap to my cheek cut off my thoughts, and my head snapped to the side. The left side of my face immediately stung, but I was grateful for the chance not to look at him.
He was of average height and slightly balding. He, too, wore the black uniform as all the other Zekans in the place, but there was more bling pinned to his shoulder patch, prompting me to wonder how many people he had killed to earn those medals. Physically, there was nothing grotesque about him. Sure, his eyes were bigger than most, almost bulging out of their sockets, but other than that, he would have only been remarkably unattractive and nothing else.
What sickened me was the total absence of humanity in him. The foul smell emanating from him perfectly defined his character. It reminded me of rotten carcasses. I remembered the Zekan who had attacked me and knew I had been silly. That one would have been an angel compared to the creature before me.
He grinned, showing bloodstained teeth, and I gagged again as bile rose to my throat. He yanked my head back by the hair, forcing me to stare directly at the bottomless well of evil in his eyes. I tried to breathe through my mouth. One whiff of him when we were this close would have my puke all over us both.
His tongue shot out. I should have been prepared for that—it seemed the all-time favorite trick of Zekans—but I still cringed at the slimy slap of his tongue against my cheek. He licked the side of my face, starting just below my eyelid until his tongue touched my chin.
“Who turned you, Delilah?”
I closed my eyes tightly, holding back the scream of disgust threatening to burst from my throat. His tongue folded back with a slight swishing sound, and he began sniffing all over my face.
“Nothing smells as good as Evren once you’ve tasted it.” He twisted my hair painfully, pulling my head back once more as he commanded, “Look at me!”
A smile broke out on his face, when my eyes snapped open, serving to make him look more grotesque. “That’s better. Now, where were we?” He let go of my hair and tapped his chin thoughtfully. After a few seconds, he exclaimed, “Ah.”
He took a lock of my hair between his fingers. “So, smooth,” he murmured. “But useless. I’d rather have you all bald. It makes the preparation easier. Your flesh fetches a high price in our markets. Do you know that?”
“No.” I was proud of the steadiness of my voice.
“You know now.” He laughed a little, sounding secretive, and I had a bad feeling he was psychotic, close to being insane.
Fear should have been coursing through me now. Tears should have been leaking past my lashes but strangely enough, I didn’t feel like crying. If anything, I was in the mood for…cutting off snake heads? Crushing the brains out of them with my stiletto? Deep-frying them and chopping them into pieces?
“But your blood.” He sighed, his eyes closing dreamily, and he patted his lean stomach. I guess his human diet wasn’t particularly fattening.
“It’s better than the oldest vintage wine, sweet nectar, or ice cold beer.” He kicked the legs of my chair and I screamed, feeling myself falling.
But he was suddenly there,
holding the back of my chair just a few inches off the ground. If he had been a second late, I would have crashed to the floor, my head cracking against the back of the chair.
His maniacal laughter made the hair on my skin stand up. “Did I scare you, little Evren?”
I stayed silent, hoping he’d just leave me alone.
“I’m not allowed to kill you. Our prince has taken a liking to your sister. He’d like to use you as, shall we say, a means of persuasion.”
He sounded so…sane. Smart and professional, like a lawyer or a college professor. Were eloquence and articulateness taught in Murder 101?
“But he didn’t tell me I couldn’t play with you. What do you think?”
I made myself look at him, searching for a clue as to how he preferred to play this through. I was tired of talking to him. I just wanted to give him whatever he wanted so he would leave me alone.
Was he a bully, preferring me to fight so he could have the satisfaction of beating me into submission? Or was he the practical sort, preferring cowering victims because they presented less trouble?
Bully, I decided.
So, I took a deep breath and snapped, “No. Someone like you can’t scare me.” For good measure, I added, “And I think you’re the ugliest—”
“Deli.” Lucian snapped in my mind just as my captor threw me across the room. I felt my head smash against the frozen wall. I think I overdid it was my last thought just before pain exploded in my skull.
Lucian was muttering something like “you little idiot” but I wasn’t sure. Ugly Zekan there was still roaring obscenities at me, then I lost consciousness.
~~~
I woke up aching all over.
It took me much longer this time to open my eyes. If they were planning to take my life by having me freeze to death, I could only be thankful they didn’t want me to suffer.
My vision cleared and this time, my bound feet were dangling in the air and my arms, also tied, were stretched above my head. I was hanging from a huge, rusty hook attached to the ceiling.
On second thought, maybe I’m not so thankful.
I guess I angered my captor too much.