by Sara Miller
Cade traced her lips with his thumb. He pulled at her bottom lip and she instinctively bit at it. He gently put his thumb in her mouth and she closed her lips around it. She swirled her tongue around it then sucked gently as he pulled back.
“See? You know what to do,” he whispered huskily.
Leah gave a tentative lick. She looked up to watch his reaction as she took him in her mouth. Cade strained for control. He put his hands back in her hair. She felt powerful. Leah sucked hard and Cade rose slightly off the bed.
“Dear God . . . Leah . . .” he groaned.
Leah smiled around him and continued her ministrations.
“Dad?” Liam was right outside the door.
In unison, Cade and Leah moved apart. Cade sighed at the loss of contact. Leah rolled over and plopped down onto the bed next to him feeling equal parts mortified and amused. She pulled the covers over her head and tried not to laugh.
“Dad? Are you awake? It’s Christmas!” Liam tried again.
“Dammit,” Cade whispered. “If it was any other day, I’d ignore him.”
“I know.” She emerged, kissed him and pulled the covers around them both.
“We’re awake, bud.”
Liam let out a whoop. Leah couldn’t help but laugh at his enthusiasm.
“Did you hear that, Sky? He’s awake but he said we, so that means Miss Leah is here too!” he whooped again. They heard an incoherent grumble of a reply.
“Are you coming out? You have to see the tree! There are so many presents!”
“It’s a good thing he’s cute,” Cade grumbled. Leah knew he might be annoyed they got interrupted but deep down he was just as excited to open gifts as his son. He didn’t fool her.
“We’ll be right out!” she called.
Liam whooped for a third time and they heard his footsteps race down the hall.
“Come on, get up!” she sat up and patted his chest. “It’s Christmas!”
“I am up. That’s the problem,” he teased and claimed another kiss before rolling out of bed.
Leah watched him tuck himself, still half erect, back into his pajama pants. It looked awkward. “Sorry.” Leah felt bad. She was the one to initiate and Liam’s interruption kept her from following through. She climbed out of bed and avoided his gaze.
Cade caught her before she could escape to the bathroom. He pulled her into his arms. “These things happen. It’s okay, I’ll survive. Just,” he paused to give her a sexy grin, “hold that thought ’til later, okay?”
She returned his grin and he kissed her thoroughly. Leah disengaged with a laugh, knowing a kiss like that was not going to help his current situation.
Leah slipped into the bathroom, quickly combed her hair and brushed her teeth. She put on her bra but stayed in her Christmas pajamas.
When she came out, Cade had put on a shirt and was eagerly waiting. He grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the door, his blue eyes twinkling with excitement.
“Come on, love! It’s Christmas!”
♦
Leah couldn’t stop smiling. Finding herself in the middle of the Emerson family’s Christmas morning felt absolutely magical. She did not feel like an outsider. Being here felt like the most perfect thing in the world. It continued to amaze her how real it felt to be with Cade.
She felt accepted. She felt wanted. She felt included.
It felt natural to have Liam on her lap as he opened his stocking. It felt normal to gang up with Sky to tease Cade. It felt right for there to be a stocking with her name on it and gifts she’d purchased and wrapped under the tree. She felt this was the life she was supposed to have.
“Look at this!” Liam was showing her all the things in his stocking. Small trinkets, toys, and candy she and Cade had picked out.
“It’s playdough, yes! And gummy snacks. I love gummy snacks!” Liam held each item up for her approval.
“I’m glad you like them.” She gave him a squeeze. “What about you, Sky? Any hair bows?”
“I’m never gonna live that down, am I?” Cade groaned but he seemed more happy than upset.
“Head bands, no bows,” Sky confirmed. “The kind I like too. And this one matches my favorite sweater perfectly! Thank you, Leah!”
“Hey, how do you know I didn’t pick it out!”
Cade crossed his arms and pouted. More accurately, he attempted to pout but his face kept trying to laugh. Sky did laugh, which made the rest of them laugh too.
“Your turn, Miss Leah! Open yours. Here, I’ll help!” Liam had her stocking and began to pull things out. She saw Cade move to intervene but she stopped him. For her, this was more fun.
“This looks like . . . lipstick or something?”
“Lip gloss,” Sky corrected. “Oh, pretty. It’s pink and it shimmers! I got clear.”
It was on Leah’s lips to offer to trade but Cade shook his head. It was both beautiful and a bit disconcerting the way he could sometimes read her thoughts.
“Gum!” Liam shouted. “Mint, yuck!”
“It’s for me, silly. I like mint!” She gave him a little shake and he giggled as he continued to explore her stocking.
Cade also began opening his stocking. She watched as he pulled out his special treasures too. They both got fuzzy socks and candy. Cade also got an air freshener for his truck and a squishy stress reliever that was shaped like a hammer.
With their stockings opened, Leah eyed the mound of presents and wondered who would open what first. Instead, Sky and Liam stood up. Cade rose and pulled Leah to her feet.
“Breakfast time! Want to be lazy on the couch or help me cook?” he teased. Her love of cooking was no secret.
“What are we making?”
Cade listed off the works: bacon, sausage, eggs, and hash browns. The children cheered.
“Pancakes or French toast?” he offered.
“Oh! I wish I had a waffle iron. That’s what I should have put on my list.” Leah was disappointed. She knew this was an Emerson Christmas but not having waffles on Christmas morning just seemed wrong.
They made their way to the kitchen and Liam started pulling things they would need out of the fridge. He was such a good helper. She smiled and touched his head. He grinned up at her.
Leah noticed Sky and Cade having a private conversation. When Cade gave his daughter a tiny nod, Sky’s face lit in a pretty smile. She rushed out of the kitchen.
“What was that about?” Leah asked.
Cade shrugged, not giving her an answer. Instead, he smiled smugly. She eyed him but before she could get him to confess, Sky returned with a medium-sized box and presented it to Leah.
“I thought we were doing gifts after breakfast?”
“Dad said it was okay.” Sky pushed the box into her arms. “Ugh, take it, it’s heavy.”
Leah took the box and set it on the counter top. The size and weight gave her a clue. She looked to Cade and he nodded. Leah opened her gift.
“Yes!” Liam whooped. “Waffles!”
“It’s perfect! How did you know?”
“You mentioned wanting to make waffles before,” Cade shrugged. “Then Sky mentioned she saw you looking at them in the store.” He looked to Sky, giving her credit. She beamed.
“It really is perfect!” She kissed Cade and gave Sky a side hug. She was even happier when she felt Sky hug her back.
That was the real Christmas gift.
Trying not to be overwhelmed by her emotions, Leah focused on removing the waffle iron from the box. With that done, they all turned their attention toward preparing the food.
Making breakfast as a family was mass chaos but Leah loved every moment of it. Eventually the kids cleared out, leaving Cade and Leah to easily finish the meal preparation. Sky and Liam returned when the food was ready and made quick work of it.
When the mountain of waffles had dwindled down to two and Cade had snagged the last piece of bacon, Liam was practically bouncing in his chair. His excitement could barely be contained. Even Sky’s
gaze kept shifting toward the tree.
“Well, I think it’s about time for my after-breakfast nap.” Cade stretched and pretended to yawn.
“Dad!” Liam roared.
“He’s just kidding, bud,” Sky assured him.
Liam shook his little head at his father as if gravely disappointed in him. Leah couldn’t help but laugh.
They ignored the dishes and headed back to the living room. Liam’s eyes were glued to the mountain of presents. Cade had him pass out all the gifts before anyone started opening anything.
As they took turns opening their gifts, the stacks of presents slowly disappeared but piles of wrapping paper, empty boxes, and discarded bows took over. Leah surveyed the gift carnage and smiled. She was delighted with her new fuzzy pajamas and mint cocoa. Sky’s gift of a deluxe edition Kane Brown CD was a pleasant surprise.
“You seem to really like that guy whenever he comes on the radio,” Sky shrugged. “Especially the more lovey-dovey songs.” She made a face.
“He’s one of my favorite country artists right now. Wow, Sky, thank you. You really have a talent for gifts!”
Sky smiled shyly, pleased but uncomfortable with the attention. She sifted through her gifts and pulled out her new headphones.
Leah remembered shopping with Cade. He had grabbed earbuds at first but she had steered him toward the old-school style of headphones instead.
“These are perfect.” Sky put on her new headphones and flashed her dad a bright smile. “I hate how earbuds fit, they always hurt or fall out. Thanks, Dad.”
“You’re welcome, darlin’.” Cade reached out and squeezed Leah’s hand. She squeezed back, thankful to have helped.
Liam jumped from gift-to-gift before diving into his new animal encyclopedia. Leah was glad it was a hit.
Cade enjoyed his Christmas haul as well. Leah wasn’t comfortable with all his gifts being work related, even though Cade had asked for them. That just didn’t feel like much fun to her.
Leah was glad she had veered from his list. It felt great to see him smile and laugh at her gift. He’d barked with laughter when he pulled the black apron out of the box.
“What’d ya get, Dad?” Liam asked.
“An apron for when I grill.”
“That’s nice,” Liam said, quickly returning to his own presents.
Sky however was a little older and wiser. She leaned over so she could see the front. Leah watched as the teen took in the image of a pig and the saying “every butt deserves to be rubbed.”
“Do you get it?” Cade asked.
“Yes,” she told him. She turned to Leah, “And yes. I believe my English teacher would call that a double entendre.” She gave them both such a disapproving look that soon the three of them were laughing.
“What’s so funny?” Liam demanded. He crawled over and took the apron. “Ha! Pig butt!” he laughed, causing them all to laugh harder.
Leah loved this family so much.
Chapter 28
After all the gifts were opened and the kids had cleaned up the living room, Leah and Cade tackled the kitchen.
“Hey, what about the ‘give back’ gift? I thought I was baking cookies for the kids to pass out.” She turned to Cade, feeling disappointed at being left out. Which was silly since they had included her in so much. Cade looked guilty.
“Well, I did call around and a few nursing home facilities sounded like they wouldn’t mind if we just dropped them off as a donation . . .”
“Oh, so not the great idea we thought it’d be.” Now she really was disappointed. She continued to clean up as Cade continued.
“Kind of, yeah. So we picked out some store-bought treats and dropped them off at one of the places I called. It was a bit anticlimactic and I could tell the kids were bummed.”
Leah nodded. That sucked. The kids had been pretty excited; they all were.
“So I called around a few more places.”
“Yeah?” She did not feel very hopeful.
“And I found a place that said their residents get very few visitors, even on the holidays.”
Leah looked up, “Really?”
“And they said they would be thrilled if a family wanted to stop by and visit. Especially with homemade cookies.”
“Really!”
Cade nodded.
“So did you go?!”
“It’s just now Christmas.”
It took a second for his meaning to sink in. They hadn’t gone yet. She checked the time and saw it was still plenty early in the day.
“So you mean . . .”
“Are you up to some baking?”
“You want me to bake cookies. Like right now?”
“Cookies!” Liam whooped behind her and she jumped.
“We’ll help,” Sky offered with a shrug. She did look hopeful though.
Leah nodded, Liam whooped, and they all got to work. Leah mixed up a batch of simple sugar cookie dough. It had been one of Gigi’s favorite recipes and was perfect for last-minute baking. The dough was easy to make, could be baked right away, and the cookies were delicious.
When Sky said she wished they looked more Christmassy, Leah shocked her by using food coloring to make red and green sugar. Once rolled in the sugar, the cookies instantly looked festive. They quickly slid the trays in to bake.
As they waited, they decided to also make chocolate chip cookies. Nothing fancy, but they all thought the elderly could have one of each or choose their favorite. As Liam was ready to dump in the chocolate chips, Sky stopped him and ran out of the room. Their confusion did not last long. Sky returned with the bag of red and green M&M’s she had received in her stocking. Everyone approved of the substitution.
When all the cookies were baked and almost cooled, Cade supplied two Christmas tins perfect for transporting them. There were enough cookies for Leah to set aside some for the family to enjoy when they returned home. Soon everyone and the tins were piled in Cade’s truck.
The rest of the afternoon was a blur of activity. The residents of Willow Acres, a small facility Leah had never heard of, were absolutely charmed by the Emerson children. The kids sported Santa hats as Liam handed out sugar cookies and Sky happily gave out her M&M cookies.
Sky and Liam listened attentively to the residents’ stories of Christmases past. They gave out hugs along with the cookies. Leah was moved by the experience. Her heart ached for these forgotten loved ones. She was so blessed to have been a part of this.
On their way out, they left the remainder of the cookies with the staff. The staff thanked them over and over.
“Thank you. You have a beautiful family, you and your wife should be so proud,” they gushed.
Leah looked from Cade to the kids, but no one seemed upset at the misconception.
“It was our pleasure.” Cade did not correct them.
♦
Much later that evening, Leah sat snuggled on the couch with Cade. Liam had finally been put to bed after several failed attempts. During which, Leah saw Sky sneak into the kitchen several times and emerge with a cookie. It was Christmas, so she just winked and smiled.
Now the house was finally silent and they were all alone. Cade had turned off all the lights. The Christmas tree’s colorful lights were the only thing penetrating the darkness.
“I think today was perfect,” Leah sighed contentedly.
“Just about,” Cade agreed and pulled her onto his lap.
“Only just about?” Leah gazed at Cade’s suddenly serious face. She put her palm to his cheek and he leaned into her caress.
“Cade?”
“There should be one more present, remember?”
Leah wracked her brain. She thought back to their list-making. They’d done the standard ones and the extra ones and even the giving-back one. What got missed?
“Oh!” Leah finally remembered. “The family gift! What did you all decide on? Why didn’t you get it? Is it here, should we wake the kids?”
Cade chuckled at her concern and she
frowned. He squeezed her to him and kissed her.
“It’s right here but we don’t have it. Not yet. Not fully.”
“What are you talking about, crazy man?” she teased, completely confused.
“I love you, Leah.” He looked so serious.
“And I love you too, Cade,” she replied, completely sincere.
“I love you and I want to marry you. We want you to be part of our family.”
Leah wanted that too. What she had with Cade and his children felt real. It felt right. She’d never been so happy. “Cade I—”
“As soon as you can, love. We want you. It’s what we all agreed on for our family Christmas gift: I want you as my wife and the kids want you to be their mom.”
The word “mom” echoed in Leah’s mind. It reverberated until it touched her soul and the hidden recesses of her mind. Reality and her dream world collided.
She froze.
She was going to be a mother.
Cade stretched and plucked a small gift from the Christmas tree. He opened the classic black velvet box and held it out to her.
“Do you want me to get down on one knee?”
Leah shook her head. She could not take her eyes off the elegant engagement ring. The diamond twinkled as it reflected the Christmas lights.
“Leah, will you marry me?”
She tried to smile, tried to open her mouth to say yes, but the word would not come out. Instead, her head shook “no” of its own accord.
“After,” he insisted, “after everything is settled.”
Leah’s head shook again. She willed her mouth to say yes. She wanted to be Mrs. Cade Emerson almost more than anything in the world. She loved him. She loved his children. She wanted to be their mom.
Being a mother was what she wanted the absolute most.
Leah’s body was betraying her. Why was this happening now?
Cade was waiting for her answer.
Her mouth would not let her say yes. It wouldn’t let her say anything. She had always been able to talk to Cade. Why couldn’t she get her words out?
Panic filled her. Her heart raced wildly, she felt herself grow warm then cool, and her hands began to tremble. Her chest hurt, hurt in a way it had never hurt before, making it difficult to breathe. She opened her mouth, trying to talk, trying to take a breath, anything that might help her. But still, her dream self would not speak.