by Sherri Hayes
Placing my hands on Brianna’s waist, I turned her around and sat her down on my lap so we were both facing Richard. She gravitated to her favorite position and laid her head on my shoulder. I placed a kiss at her temple before turning back to my uncle.
“We have plans today after the board meeting.” It was all I was willing to offer him. He needed to get over his aversion to my relationship with Brianna.
“I see,” he said without elaborating.
“Was there something you needed before the meeting?”
He’d been staring at Brianna but snapped his eyes to me. “Your aunt was hoping I could convince you to come to dinner this Sunday. She told me to tell you she’s making her homemade spaghetti and meatballs.”
I chuckled. After my parents’ deaths, I’d lost my appetite. No matter what my aunt had put in front of me, I would eat a couple of bites and then stop. It had all tasted bland to me. Then one day she’d pulled me into the kitchen with her, pleading for my help to make homemade spaghetti and meatballs. We’d worked for hours making the sauce and the meatballs, even the bread. That night, I’d sat down and eaten the fruits of my labors, and for the first time in months, I ate everything on my plate.
Diane bribing me with her spaghetti and meatballs was a plea. One I couldn’t deny her.
“Let Diane know we’ll be there.”
“Thank you.” He sighed in relief.
I glanced over at the clock on my desk and realized it was almost time for the meeting to start.
“I’ll meet you in the conference room. I need to make sure Brianna’s settled.”
“Of course.”
He turned to go but then stopped and looked at Brianna.
“It was good seeing you again, Brianna.” Before she could respond, he walked out the door.
Brianna
I was glad when Dr. Cooper left, but I also knew that meant Stephan would be leaving soon, too. When Stephan told me I’d be going to work with him, I’d felt relieved. Even though I knew eventually I’d have to be left alone again, I wasn’t ready. Plus, I liked being with him.
“I need to go to my meeting, sweetheart.” He patted my leg, letting me know he wanted me to move from his lap.
Stephan stood, reached over to the phone on the desk, and pressed a few buttons. I had no idea what he was doing, so I waited.
“I’ve forwarded my phone so all my calls will go out to Jamie. She’s been instructed not to let anyone into my office while I’m gone, but if you should need anything, press this button here. Jamie will answer.” He stood there waiting, and I realized he wanted me to answer him.
“Yes, Sir.”
He tilted my chin up with two fingers until I was looking at him.
“I’m hoping this meeting won’t last more than a few hours. You can read, listen to music, or take a nap . . . the bathroom is through that door if you need to use it. If you need something that isn’t in this room, you call Jamie.”
“Okay.”
“Good girl. Now give me a kiss so that I have something to think about while I’m sitting in this boring meeting.”
Stephan released my chin, and I didn’t waste any time wrapping my arms around his neck. He smiled as he bent his head to kiss me.
The kiss didn’t last nearly long enough. I wanted more. Then again, I always seemed to want more of Stephan’s kisses.
He chuckled as he stepped back. “More later. I promise.”
Stephan walked to the door, straightening his jacket and tie. He paused and turned to look at me from head to toe. I was right where I’d been moments before, still enjoying the impression of his mouth on mine. There was something in his stare that made my heart beat faster. He smiled at me, and I smiled back. Then he was gone, leaving me alone.
I looked around his office, not knowing what to do with myself. There were very few signs of him in the space. Most of the furnishings were generic things found in almost any office. There were only two exceptions. On the wall was a picture of him and his uncle at what looked to be a ribbon cutting, and there was a picture of me on his desk.
My picture was something I hadn’t expected to see. I was pretty sure Stephan cared about me. He was so nice to me, and he made sure I had what I needed. Did his having a picture of me in his office mean it was more than that? The thought that it could had me smiling so wide my cheeks began to hurt.
I walked over to the couch and picked up the small bag I’d brought with me. At first, I’d been happy I wouldn’t have to stay in the condo by myself and that I’d get more time with him. That had lasted for all of thirty seconds before he’d told me it was because he and Lily had to attend a board meeting and he didn’t want to leave me alone just yet.
At his instruction, I’d packed a bag with two of the books I’d been reading, my journal, and some magazines Lily had brought me. Picking up the bag, I pulled everything out. For some reason, reading the books I’d been working on didn’t appeal to me, so I set them aside. I glanced at my journal, remembering how Stephan had me write down my feelings about what had happened with John. It had been difficult, and I’d needed to stop a few times. Stephan had held me, comforted me, until I could go back to it. I didn’t want to think about that right now, however, so I picked up one of the magazines.
The cover of the first one claimed to have all the secrets to snaring the perfect boyfriend, along with makeup tips and the ten hottest guys of summer. I flipped through the pages briefly. The tips on a boyfriend weren’t for me. I had no desire to get a boyfriend. I had Stephan, and he could keep me for as long as he wanted. The ten hottest guys were okay. I’d seen some of them on television before. They were all celebrities and cute in their own way. Some of them had a lot of muscles, others not so much. None of them, however, had anything on Stephan. His body was beautiful to me. I loved seeing it, touching it . . .
I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, remembering the previous night. After an all-too-quick shower, he’d taken me back to his bed. He’d held my wrists over my head as his penis filled me. It was as if he’d been surrounding me, protecting me. Like if I fell, he’d be there to catch me.
Thinking about him holding me down, restraining me, I remembered the rope. Stephan had been honest with me. I knew he was what he called a Dominant and that he wanted me to be his submissive. We’d talked a little about what he liked, what he expected of me, but that had been before we’d had sex. Would he want to tie me up? I didn’t know how I felt about that, but I also knew I wanted to make him happy.
There was a knock at the door.
I threw the magazine down on the couch, anxious. Who was there?
A second later, my question was answered. The woman Stephan had introduced me to as his assistant, Jamie, peeked her head in the door. When she glanced over at me on the couch, she smiled.
“Sorry to bother you, but I wanted to check and see if you’d like anything to drink. We have water or coffee. Or I can call down to the café and have them deliver something else.”
Although Jamie seemed nice, I was nervous. I didn’t like new people.
“I’m . . . okay.”
She grinned.
“All right. Well, if you change your mind just call me. Mr. Coleman said he showed you how to use the phone?”
“Yes.” I nodded.
“I’ll leave you to your reading, then,” she said, closing the door behind her.
I sat staring at the door for several minutes after she left. Jamie was very pretty. She was taller than me, maybe five foot seven or eight, and she had long blond hair. I knew Stephan worked with Jamie all the time—she was his assistant, after all—but did he feel anything else for her?
The possibility made me feel sick to my stomach. While I knew I had no real claim on Stephan, I didn’t want anyone else to have him. He was mine. I knew it wasn’t right to feel that way, but I couldn’t help it. My gaze drifted over to where the picture of me sat on his desk. That had to mean what I thought it did, didn’t it? I was important to him,
wasn’t I?
By the time Stephan returned, there were tears in my eyes. He noticed immediately, of course, and gathered me into his arms.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, tucking my head against his chest.
I instantly felt better. The anxiety that had been plaguing me fell away, and I was left with a warm, tingly feeling.
“Is everything all right?” I jumped a little when I heard Dr. Cooper’s voice behind Stephan.
Instead of answering Dr. Cooper, Stephan tilted my face up to look at me, brushing the tears that had fallen off my cheeks. He just stared, and I realized he was waiting for me to answer his question. “I’m okay.”
He continued to look at me as if searching for something. I knew I’d have to tell him what had been bothering me, but I didn’t want to say anything in front of Dr. Cooper. He already didn’t like me much. I didn’t want to give him any more reasons to think Stephan shouldn’t be with me.
After a long pause, Stephan nodded and then turned to address his uncle. “Everything’s fine. Did you need something?”
“I was going to grab lunch before heading back to the office this afternoon, and wanted to know if you two would like to join me.”
“Thank you for the offer, but we’ve already got plans for this afternoon,” Stephan said, continuing to rub his hands up and down my back.
The two exchanged a few more words, but I wasn’t paying attention to them. All I wanted was for Dr. Cooper to leave already so Stephan and I could be together.
Chapter 9
Stephan
The only thing on my mind was getting Brianna out of my office so we could talk. Even though she said she was okay, I knew something was on her mind. One thing I’d learned about her over the last two months was that emotional worries tended to do more damage to her than physical ones. Whatever this was, she needed to talk about it. Doing so here, however, wasn’t a good idea.
My uncle following me out of the meeting and finding me holding a crying Brianna in my office only complicated things further. I was beginning to think Richard had some sort of radar where she and I were concerned. It wasn’t helping his opinion of the situation, nor was it helping Brianna’s comfort level with him.
As quickly as I could, I gathered Brianna’s things back into her bag and got us out of there. Jamie waved good-bye to Brianna as we stepped onto the elevator, and while Brianna responded, she seemed reluctant. It made me wonder if something had happened between the two. Jamie had been my assistant since I’d taken over The Coleman Foundation. She was efficient and reliable. I’d never had a problem with her. However, Brianna’s response to her had changed. Something had happened.
“What would you like for lunch, Brianna?”
She looked up at me, her blue eyes wide.
I waited. What we had for lunch wasn’t all that important to me. It had to be portable, that was all.
Her lips pressed together hard, and she glanced down. She was thinking.
“Cheeseburger?”
In all the time Brianna had been with me, I realized we’d only ever indulged in a simple burger once, when I’d taken her to the zoo. That seemed like a lifetime ago. So much had changed. In college, I’d practically lived on cheeseburgers. They were fast, could be eaten on the run and, as long as you bought it at a decent place, tasted good.
“Cheeseburgers it is,” I said, helping her into the car.
We drove to a restaurant near Minnehaha Park. I’d heard they had good burgers. It was time I found out what all the fuss was about.
It was almost noon, and the restaurant was busy. Brianna held tight to my hand as we entered, and I pulled her close to my side. A man greeted us and handed me a menu to look over. They had a whole page of different types of burgers. Everything from a simple cheeseburger with all the usual toppings, to something they called a Garbage Burger with an egg on it.
“They have a lot to choose from, Brianna. What kind of cheeseburger would you like?”
She pointed to the classic cheeseburger at the top of the page. I had no idea if she’d even read the rest, but if that was what she wanted, then that was what she would get. I went for something a little more adventurous, a chipotle burger with jalapenos.
With our orders in, we walked over to the long bench along the wall and waited. Brianna kept looking around at all the people. I knew she was nervous, but she was going to have to get used to being around people to some degree. At least this way I knew she was safe. I had no idea if she’d be ready to go to school in the fall, but I wanted her to try. She needed to have some independence, some schooling she could use out in the world, even if she never used it.
About fifteen minutes later, the man approached us again, this time carrying two bags. Brianna cringed and stepped closer to me. I gave her fingers a squeeze before releasing my hold on her and taking the bags from the restaurant employee. She stayed glued to my side, rigid, until the man walked back behind the host podium.
“Number?” I leaned down to whisper in her ear.
“F-four.”
Shifting the bags to one hand, I made her look at me. “Only four?”
She pressed her lips together and nodded.
I pulled her into my arms briefly, and kissed her. “Let’s go before our food gets cold.”
The ride to the park was quiet. Brianna looked out the window. It was a beautiful day, and there were quite a few people out enjoying it. I knew the park wouldn’t be any different.
I made sure to park as close to where we were going as possible. Thankfully, there were parking areas inside the park itself, not just on the perimeter. Brianna was still unpredictable around people, and if we needed to leave quickly, I didn’t want to have to walk three blocks to reach the car.
She didn’t say anything as I threw my suit jacket in the backseat and then grabbed the food and the blanket I kept in the trunk. I helped her out of the vehicle, balancing the food and the blanket in one arm, and laced our fingers together. It was a gorgeous spring day in Minneapolis, and I wanted to share it with her. I also thought it would be good for her to be around people in what I hoped was a less-threatening environment.
I found a spot not far from the wading pond. We were close to the Mississippi River—I could hear the sound of flowing water in the distance—but it was out of view. If things went well, maybe we’d walk down to where we could see it after we ate.
First things first, however. I gave her hand a squeeze before releasing it and set the food down on the grass near the base of a large maple tree. Looking over the area, it looked level enough, and I spread out the blanket. She stood watching with her hands balled into fists at her side.
After straightening the blanket, I motioned for her to join me. She hurried over to sit down. I smiled and handed her the container with her sandwich.
We sat in silence for a while, eating. Brianna hadn’t relaxed. She would take a bite of her sandwich and then glance up, her eyes darting from side to side at all the people around us. The nearest person was over twenty feet away. I didn’t understand what had her so nervous unless it was the openness of the environment itself.
I sighed and reached for her, situating her between my legs, her back against my chest. As soon as we made contact, the tension began to release from her muscles. Even though I loved that my touch calmed her, Brianna needed to find strength within herself as well.
“Close your eyes,” I whispered in her ear.
It took her only a moment’s pause before she complied.
“Good girl,” I said, placing a kiss on her shoulder. “Now tell me what you hear.”
“People.”
I smiled. Such a simple answer, but not what I was looking for. Lily had told me what happened the other day while I was at the office. Although Brianna had managed to find her way back to the present without me, it had taken nearly twenty minutes. Lily had been frightened seeing Brianna like that, completely unaware of her surroundings. I’d taken the time while I was working from home on Thursd
ay to do some research.
“What about the people? What do you hear them doing?”
She was quiet for several very long minutes. I watched as she scrunched up her nose, pressed her lips together, and tilted her head. It was extremely cute, and the urge to kiss her surfaced, but I forced myself to remain still and allow her to follow through on the exercise.
“Kids . . . splashing in water. A woman . . . laughing. Someone running?”
She paused.
“Anything else?”
“Dogs barking.” She smiled. “They sound happy.”
I wrapped her in my arms and held her close, my nose skimming along her neck to her ear. “Very good. And do any of those things sound like they are going to cause you harm?”
“No.” Her response was quiet, barely even a sound at all. Of course, that probably had something to do with my mouth on her neck and my hand creeping up her bare thigh. I’d wanted to distract her, and I was pleased to have accomplished my goal.
“Open your eyes, Brianna.”
She opened her eyes and blinked against the sunlight.
“Do you see the people now? They are still doing all the things you heard. Just because you can see them doesn’t make them any more frightening.”
She didn’t respond, but I knew she’d heard as she looked around again. I could almost see her mind working through the new concept. Just like with the cane, she had to learn that it wasn’t the thing—or in this case, people—that were the danger. It was the who, the person themselves.
“When you feel frightened by a situation, I want you to stop and listen. Concentrate on what is around you, what’s happening in the here and now, not the past, and decide if it’s truly a danger.”
Brianna nodded and sank back against my chest. I tightened my hold on her and kissed the exposed skin on her neck where her hair had fallen to the side.
Although everything felt right for the moment, I knew we needed to talk. I took her hand in mine, rubbing my thumb over her fingers. “Tell me what upset you earlier in my office. Did something happen while I was gone?”