by Fields, MJ
As much as I’d hoped he would stay and toss around ideas with me, I didn’t want to assume and be wrong. I doubted I would’ve survived that letdown on top of everything else I’d been hit with tonight. So when he said he’d stay, I wanted to throw my arms around his neck and hug him tight. I didn’t, of course; not only would that be incredibly inappropriate, but I doubted I’d be able to stop myself from taking it further. Especially with as grateful as I was in this moment.
“Go grab your laptop; I’ll order us some food. We’ll need something to eat if we plan on burning the midnight oil.” He pulled up an app on his phone and searched through the endless list of possible restaurants to choose from.
Around two in the morning, we were both in need of a break. We’d spent hours discussing every possible option either of us could think of, as well as their pros and cons. Some of our ideas would’ve just been a waste of time, while others would’ve taken too long to get going.
“At the end of the day, we need something that’ll disprove what everyone’s saying about you right now. And we need that to happen very quickly.” Finn scratched his head and groaned.
“As much as I hate to say it, I kind of wish I hadn’t bailed on Beach Babes.”
Finn moved the laptop to the coffee table and leaned forward, holding himself up with his forearms on his knees. “You can’t think like that. That campaign wouldn’t have helped you. If anything, it would’ve made things worse, so maybe we should be thankful they sent you dental floss instead of an actual bathing suit.”
“What do you mean? How could it have made things worse?”
“Think about it…people are saying you’re superficial, that you’re shallow and judge others on their physical appearance. It would look so bad if you then ran an entire promotion around you in a bikini. They’d probably say you were trying to flaunt your perfect body in their faces or something equally ludicrous.”
Ignoring his perfect body comment, I focused on what he was saying, and I had to agree with him. While I thought it was ridiculous that people would say those things, he was right, which meant I needed to let that idea go.
“Can I ask why you didn’t want to go through with it?” He studied me, as if trying to read my mind. “I know what you told me, so I guess what I’m asking is…what’s your issue with it being too revealing?”
For reasons I couldn’t comprehend, I had a hard time expressing things to him. Not because he was a difficult person to talk to, but because voicing my thoughts and feelings to him made me feel…well, stupid. Even though I put myself out there for the whole world to judge, there were still things that triggered insecurities within myself—and the biggest one was looking foolish in front of others.
However, there was also something about Finn that made me want to open up, which, inadvertently, could end up compelling me to shed those fears. So rather than cower or make up an excuse, I took a deep breath and gave him the truth.
“I’ve always wanted to promote authentic products that people would actually appreciate and use. I understand that not everyone will like or even be able to use the same things, but as long as I’m offering something to the majority, then I’m happy. What’s the point in having a promotional code to save them money if very few actually participate?”
Finn held my stare the entire time I spoke, as if eating up my every word.
“And in my opinion, offering a discount on a bathing suit that’ll only fit women who are a size two or smaller isn’t worth it. The last thing I want to do is isolate the majority of my followers. If I don’t give them things they want, they have no reason to continue following me. Am I right?” There always came a point when I felt like I’d said too much, and when that time came, I had a tendency to just stop talking. Which was exactly what I did.
“Yeah, I get that. So if it were a two-piece that covered more, you’d be okay with it?”
“Exactly.” Staring into his eyes, I felt like he got me, like he understood me when no one else did. It was the strangest feeling, but also the most comforting. “For example, there’s a clothing store here in town. Actually, I think they’re all throughout this area, but they’re a relatively small company. Anyway, the models on their website are real people, not the normal stick figures with flat stomachs and perky tits. But anyone can wear their clothes. They flatter all shapes and sizes. That’s what I want—to offer something just about anyone can use.”
He stared at the floor, hands folded between his parted legs, and nodded. He didn’t say anything, didn’t ask questions, barely even blinked. Just nodded, as if he were deep in thought. Then, after a full minute, he grabbed the laptop off the coffee table, sat back on the sofa, and said, “I’ve got an idea.”
Based on the gleam in his eye, I couldn’t wait to hear it.
* * *
Finn had stayed up all night working. I’d fallen asleep shortly after his epiphany, and when I woke up around eight yesterday morning, I found him passed out exactly where I’d left him, sitting on the sofa with his head dropped back.
This morning, he came by to run over the plan. I’d spent all day working out some of the kinks and getting everything put in place—with him by my side, of course—and now, it was time to meet up with the girls.
I couldn’t wait to tell them my news.
Nellie, Brooke, and Julie were already at the table when I walked in, so at least I didn’t have to bite my tongue waiting for the entire group to arrive. Unfortunately, Nellie and Brooke seemed to be in the middle of something, which completely ruined my plan of stealing the conversation as soon as I sat down.
Julie and I greeted each other as I took my seat, making brief small talk before Nellie called us into her conversation with Brooke. “Guys, isn’t she acting weird?” she asked, pointing to our friend who was sat across from me.
“No I’m not. You are.” The panic on Brooke’s face intensified when her phone buzzed in her lap, making her jump in surprise.
“Give me your phone. You’re being sneaky, like you don’t want me to see something. Are you talking to Chase?” Without warning, Nellie grabbed the top of Brooke’s cell and tried to yank it out of her hands.
Julie and I just sat there and watched it all play out in front of us. Despite being invited into their scuffle, we were merely spectators. Honestly, I was just as curious as Nellie was about who Brooke was texting, hoping it wasn’t her ex, Chase, considering he was a total douchebag who’d cheated on her.
“Would you two quit it?” It seemed Julie was just as annoyed as I was.
However, that didn’t make them stop fighting over the phone. And the longer this went on, the less likely I’d get to share my news with everyone. I didn’t often seek the spotlight or demand to be the center of attention at our twice-monthly meet up, but this was a really big deal, and I wanted to celebrate it with my best friends. Which wouldn’t happen if they continued to battle it out over who Brooke was or wasn’t texting.
“I know how to solve this.” I leaned across the table, grabbed the device from both of them and dropped it into the glass of ice water in the middle of the table. That way, I could guarantee they’d stop bickering about it.
However, I hadn’t exactly thought that out, which was brought to my attention when Brooke turned her wide, shocked eyes on me and yelled, “What the hell, Mady!” She quickly pulled her phone out of the cup and began to frantically dry it off with her napkin.
“That played out so much better in my head.” I shrugged, hoping if I didn’t make it out to be a big deal, then no one else would, either. “You two wouldn’t let it go, so like the mom I am, I took the toy from the children who can’t get along.”
I couldn’t begin to count how many times I’d heard my mom say that to Gia and me. It was something I’d always hated hearing, which was why it had been such a shock to hear those words come out of my mouth.
“What are you talking about?” Nellie asked. “You’re not a mom!”
“Yeah. But we’re all girls,
so we have that mom gene. You know?” I mentally patted myself on the back for coming up with such a good explanation on the spot. Especially because my brain could only think of one thing at the moment—the plan I desperately wanted to share.
Thankfully, everyone at the table began to laugh uncontrollably. There was a good chance I’d have to buy Brooke a new phone, but that was okay with me, just as long as they weren’t all pissed that I’d just dunked her cell in a glass of water. But, hey…it could’ve been worse.
“Now that I’ve got your attention,” I said, once the table had quieted down. “I’ve got really big news. As you all know, Gia posted a screenshot of our texts online the other night, and it kind of brought a bunch of negative attention my way.”
I already knew that Julie had filled them in, because they’d all texted me over the last couple of days, asking how I was doing and if there was anything they could do to help. So at least I didn’t have to go into detail about that again. I could just skip to the good parts.
“What did you end up doing about that?” Julie asked. “What did Gia say?”
Considering I couldn’t answer her first question without giving away the surprise, I focused on the last one. “She called me yesterday morning in tears, apologizing like she’d just killed my cat.”
Nellie held up her hand, interrupting me to ask, “Wait…you have a cat?”
“No. It’s a figure of speech.” At least, I thought it was. I shook off the doubt that set in and continued. “I just felt so bad, because I know she didn’t expect it to gain that kind of attention. She was going to delete the post, but I convinced her not to.”
“Why would you do that?” Brooke stared at me in shock.
“I didn’t want to give the haters the satisfaction.”
They all shrugged, silently agreeing with me.
“Anyway, I feel awful because I don’t know what to do. Gia has been such a huge help to me over the years, which I’m beyond grateful for, but I think as the responsibility has increased, it’s taken a toll on her. I don’t want to let her go, I honestly don’t, but lately, she can’t seem to grasp everything I’ve got going on. We’re not together all the time; she’s gotten busy and hardly has time to chat.” I sighed. “I’m just worried it’ll end up coming between us.”
Julie bumped her shoulder with mine and held my stare. “I totally get it, Mady. But I also know that you’ll handle it the right way. Who knows, maybe she’ll end up being grateful to have an out. You’ve said she’s been really busy with her own job, so maybe she feels the same way you do but doesn’t know how to bring it up. You never know.”
I loved Jules. Actually, I loved all three of these women, because they could appreciate what I meant. No matter how different our lives and personalities were, they would always be there for me. I never doubted that. They knew just how deeply I cared for my sister, and none of them would ever want to see either of us hurt.
“Please tell me that didn’t affect your bathing suit deal,” Brooke pleaded.
It wasn’t until moments like these that I realized we all didn’t talk every day. I hadn’t told them this part, even though it’d happened days ago. “Actually, I’ve backed out of the Beach Babes deal.”
For a moment, they all gawked at me, surprise shrouding their faces.
“The bathing suit they sent me was held together by a few strings, and I decided I didn’t want to brand myself that way. I mean, that’s not the way I dress or the way I am. The earlier suits I’d been photographed in were completely different, so I was thrown for a loop when I received that one. But it’s okay, because I was able to get out of the contract with no repercussions.” I still hadn’t told them that I had hired Finn, and I knew that if I let that slip out now, it would become the topic of conversation, which meant I’d never be able to tell them my news.
“Well, that’s okay. It’s probably for the best anyway. And with or without it, I think I can speak for everyone here when I say we’re all really proud of you.” Nellie smiled sweetly at me. “You’ve accomplished so much over the last year, and I have no doubt that better opportunities will continue to pour in.”
“Thanks, Nellie.” Even though I knew she didn’t have a clue as to what I did for a living, her words still meant the world to me. Then again, I might’ve known what her job title was, but that didn’t mean I could explain what she did, either. So I wasn’t bothered by it. “In fact, that’s what I wanted to tell you guys. I’ve already got another prospect in the works. I was wondering if any of you wanted to go on a trip with me in two weeks?”
Julie perked up. “What’s it for?”
“Well, I’ve been in talks with Urban Wear about doing a full spread at a dude ranch.” I started to laugh, because the idea of me, Mady Russo, staying in the wilderness was beyond funny.
“Oh my God! That’s incredible! How did this happen?”
This was when it would get difficult keeping Finn out of it. But I shrugged it off and decided to fill them in on everything I had going on in my life at the moment. “Talking to my assistant the other night about my decision to back out of the swimsuit deal, I mentioned Urban Wear and how I love that they use real people to promote their clothes. And how that’s what I strive for—to offer everyone something, regardless of shape or size or gender. He took that and ran with it.”
“He?” they all shrieked at the same time. Then Nellie slapped the table and stared at me with wide eyes. “You hired the guy you thought was a girl?”
My response died on my lips when her words finally hit me. “Wait. How’d you know I thought he was a chick?” I glared at Julie, though she held up her hands, denying my silent accusation.
Nellie laughed and rolled her eyes. “You showed me the résumé, remember? You kept calling him by his last name.”
“You knew that whole time, and you didn’t bother to tell me? You just let me walk into that interview thinking he was a she?” I could’ve shaken her for that. Granted, it’d ended up working out in the end, but having a heads-up could’ve saved me a lot of humiliation.
“You have no idea how badly I wished I could’ve been a fly on that wall.” She laughed while shaking her head. “I’m so mad at myself for forgetting to follow up with you about it. With as crazy as my life’s been lately, that could’ve been the reprieve I needed.”
“So you did end up hiring him?” Julie butted in. “The same guy from the bar last weekend, right? What’s his name again?”
“Yes, that guy, and his name’s Finn.”
Nellie slapped the table again. If she kept that up, she’d knock everything off. “The one who kicked Roger’s ass?”
“The one and only.”
“Damn. He was pretty hot.” She made a scorching sound and then laughed.
“Stop!” My cheeks burst into flames, making it difficult to deny her claim. Yet that didn’t stop me from trying. “He’s totally not my type, and I don’t see him that way, whatsoever.” Even as those words flew off my tongue, I knew they weren’t true.
There was something between us, though I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. And until I knew what it was, I did not want to discuss it with the girls. If they had an inkling that I was into him, they’d probably drag us both down the aisle against our will.
“So? He doesn’t have to be your type to have fun with him. Oh! Why don’t you take him to the dude ranch? Instead of horses, just ride him.” Nellie wouldn’t let me live this down; I knew she’d push the issue. “You’re young and single; what’s stopping you?”
“He’s only worked with me for a week! And I can honestly say, he’s invaluable. He brings so much to the table, which is exactly what I need. I’ve never had that. I refuse to compromise the working relationship we’ve developed for a fling.”
The truth was, I did crave a relationship. I enjoyed being with someone—as long as they weren’t the jealous, possessive type. I wanted to be with someone I felt comfortable enough with to just bum around in pajamas all weekend, w
ithout makeup, and share ice cream out of the tub. Someone I could talk to about anything, all my dreams and fears without worry of being judged.
Someone like Finn—providing he didn’t turn out to be like every other guy I knew. So I didn’t see the point in putting our professional relationship in jeopardy only to find out that the person I desired didn’t exist.
Nellie waved me off. “I say you should take it as it comes. Just have fun with him and see where it goes. Assistants are a dime a dozen, good guys aren’t.”
“You don’t even know him. I haven’t worked with him for very long. What if he turns out to be a total asshole?”
“Bullshit. I saw him come to your defense last weekend with Roger. That’s not something a total asshole would do. Plus, he got you to break up with that douchebag, something we hadn’t succeeded in doing. He’s a winner in my book.”
I couldn’t really argue with her, but that didn’t mean I was keen on pursuing him, either.
Dandy, our regular waitress, stopped by the table with the food that must’ve been ordered before I arrived. And while they all picked at the basket of fries, they took turns pointing out every reason they could think of—most of which were utterly ridiculous—as to why I should give Finn a shot. Not one of them took into consideration that he may not even be interested. Guys like him didn’t go for girls like me.
Meanwhile, I sat back and listened, trying not to let their fantasies get to me.
So much had happened over the last couple of weeks, and there was no telling what else would come my way in the future, especially with Finn by my side. I truly had so much to look forward to.
Life was a whirlwind, and I’d been swept up for the ride.
Eight
Finn
The last couple of weeks had been hectic, to say the least.
I couldn’t believe how much I’d learned about social media and what actually went into being an influencer. Needless to say, Mady’s career turned out to be nothing like I’d imagined when I first started. Then again, I wasn’t sure how many other social media influencers had to deal with what we’d gone through in the two weeks since the bathing suit and controversial post debacle.