by Fields, MJ
“What did the doctor say?”
“They think it’s the flu. They gave me Tamiflu and told me to drink liquids and rest.”
He sighs heavily and kisses my forehead. “I hate that I can’t be here to take care of you.”
“I’m feeling much better. Besides, I don’t want you to take care of me. I just want to be with you. Please, can’t you stay awhile?”
I know I sound and look like a child as I wrap my fists in his shirt, trying to keep him there. I am just such a wreck right now. Full of anxiety and fear. Everything feels sideways.
“I can’t, and I need to get back to this meeting.”
I whimper at his words.
“How about tonight? Pack an overnight bag and come to the loft.”
At that, I let him go and look up with a huge smile on my face. I can wait a few more hours for time alone with him at the loft.
“Tonight.”
He leans in and kisses me, and then we hear Papa at the door.
“If you two are done, we need to get back to this.”
I look over at Papa. He has sadness in his eyes. I didn’t realize he and Marcello were such good friends. This entire situation has taken a toll on him.
* * *
I let myself into Cross’s loft around six. Mamma fought me on coming. She didn’t think it was safe. When I told her I was going whether she liked it or not, she insisted on her driver bringing me rather than me driving myself. I sure hope the unrest that is surrounding us all dissipates soon because I can’t take much more of this weird behavior from everyone.
Once I unpack my bag, I rummage through the refrigerator to see what I can scrounge up to make us for dinner. I figure Cross will be exhausted when he gets in, and I doubt he will want to go back out. I don’t want to either. I just want some alone time with him.
I piece together a meal with what we have available, and I set it in the oven to keep it warm. I decide to take a quick shower and change before he arrives. When I’m toweling off, I realize I forgot my nightgown, so I open Cross’s T-shirt drawer and grab one. I pull it over my head.
There is a small velvet box tucked underneath his shirts, and I pick it up and open it. Inside is the most stunning diamond ring I have ever seen. It is emerald cut and has a halo of smaller diamonds. I instantly snap it shut. Oh my God, he is going to propose, and I just ruined my own surprise. No wonder he has been acting so funny lately. His plans were derailed by these horrific events. As elated as I am, I carefully place the ring back into his drawer and cover it back up. I don’t want him to know I found it.
I look at the clock, and it is now a little past eight, so I text Cross to see when he will be home. I go to lie on the couch to watch television and wait. Being ill has really taken it out of me.
Eventually, I drift off to sleep. When I awake, it’s four in the morning, and there is still no sign of Cross. I grab my phone, and all of my messages have gone unanswered. I dial his number, and it goes straight to voicemail. Now, I’m frantic. Something must have happened.
I dial Nicco, and he answers with sleep in his voice.
“Do you know where Cross is?” I’m a panicked, hysterical mess at this point.
“Gabby? No. He is probably at home, sleeping.”
“No, he is not. I’m at his loft. He told me to come spend the night with him, and he never came home. I have sent him several texts and called a few times, and his phone is going straight to voicemail. God, what if something happened to him?”
“Calm down. I’ll see what I can find out. Just stay by your phone.”
I go to the stove, remove the ruined plates of food, and throw them in the trash. Then, I start pacing.
About forty-five minutes later, the phone rings, and Nicco’s number flashes on the screen.
“Please, please, please,” I cry into the phone instead of a greeting.
“He is fine, sis. I was able to get Stav on the phone, and he is with him and Tony. He said they got held up on some business and that they won’t be home until sometime tomorrow. Just stay put, and he will call you a little later.”
Fuck that.
“Thanks, Nicco. Sorry I woke you up for that.”
“No problem. Asshole should have called you instead of letting you sit up all night, worried. It was a dick move. I think he is just overwhelmed.”
“Yeah, probably. I’ll let you get back to sleep.”
I hang up, and I grab my bag and change quickly. Then, I call a cab. No way am I staying here now. Let him worry when he arrives to find me missing.
I hop in a cab and head to the city. I stop at an ATM and get cash to check into a hotel. I know better than to use a credit card. Papa would have me tracked down in an instant. They can all go to hell for all I care.
I am exhausted, my head is pounding, and my stomach is rolling by the time I get to my room at the Stanhope Park Hyatt. It’s seven in the morning, and I just want to cry myself to sleep and hide from it all.
My phone rouses me a few hours later. It’s Cross calling. I don’t even get it sent to voicemail before Nicco’s and then Mamma’s numbers ring through. I turn the phone off, and then I pull the covers over my head and drift back off to sleep.
Hours later, there is a banging on the door. I lift my head and look at the clock. It’s eight p.m. I slept all day.
“Go away,” I call out because I don’t want maid service, and I didn’t order food.
“Open this door, Gabby.”
Cross. It’s Cross. How did he find me?
“No. Go away!” My voice is scratchy, and I need water, but I don’t feel like getting up. My head is pounding. I cried myself to sleep, and I haven’t eaten. I’m a mess, and I just want to be left alone.
“Gabby,” he pleads. “Come, open the door, so I don’t have to break it down.”
I stand on shaky legs and wrap the comforter around me. I wade to the door and open it, leaving the chain lock in place. I peek out. He looks as bad as I feel. Good.
“What do you want, Cross?”
“Fuck.” He lets out a relieved breath. “Why haven’t you answered your phone?”
“Same reason you did not answer yours last night. I’m busy.”
“Really?” His relief has turned to anger. “You want to play childish games right now?”
“No, I don’t want to play anything. I want to be left alone. I don’t feel good. I’m too tired to do this right now.”
“Let me in.” He leans his head into the door. “Baby, please let me in.”
I finally relent and close the door to release the chain. He pushes in, and I collapse into his arms. He picks me up and carries me to the bed where he lays me down gently. I curl up and fall right back to sleep.
“Wake up, Tesoro.”
I feel him brushing the hair from my face.
“Food is here, and you need to eat.”
I open one eye and look up at him. He is beside me on the bed, and he has a tray of food across his lap. He is in his boxers, and his hair is wet, like he just took a shower. I move to sit up.
“I’m thirsty,” I manage to say.
He reaches to the side of the bed and grabs a bottle of water. He hands it to me, and I down it in one swallow.
I get up to go to the restroom, and I know I am weak. I take a look in the mirror to assess myself, and I’m a mess. My hair is sticking to the side of my head, and my eyes are puffy and bloodshot. Great, the first opportunity I have had to be alone with Cross in weeks, and this is what he gets. I splash water on my face and use the facilities. I’m actually feeling much better than I have the past few days. Perhaps all I needed was sleep.
I walk out to face him and crawl back in the bed. I lay my head on his shoulder and wait without saying a word.
“You scared the shit out of all of us yesterday,” he starts, his tone gentle. “Do you have any idea what I went through when we figured out you were missing? I damn near lost my mind, Gabby. I didn’t know if you had been kidnapped or if someone h
ad shot you in the fucking back and left you for dead in a ditch. I didn’t know where you were headed, so I had no idea where to start looking. I was frantic. Your mother and father lost their minds. Your brothers lost their minds. We practically tore the city apart searching for you.”
Remorse sinks into my bones. I did not think this through.
“I was so angry and hurt. You didn’t come home. You knew I was waiting for you, and you did not come home. I was worried, too. You weren’t returning any of my texts or calls, and I … I pretty much thought the same thing you did. I was afraid you were somewhere bleeding out.” I don’t look at him as I finish. “Then, Nicco said he finally heard from Stav and you were taking care of business. Yeah, right. What kind of business needs attention all night? It was four thirty in the morning. I was sick and I was hungry and I was angry.”
“I told Nicco to tell you I’d be home in a few hours. Why would you come to a hotel?”
“I did not want to stay there any longer, and I did not want to go back to Papa’s.”
“Gabby, you can’t just take off like that.”
“I am sorry,” I whisper through my tears. “I just …”
I can’t even finish the sentence because he is right. It was a selfish thing to do. Especially after all he just went through. Adding to his worry was not fair of me.
He leans over and kisses the top of my head, and then he hands me half of a turkey sandwich.
“Eat, baby. We have to get you home before all of New Rochelle descends on us.”
“How did you find me?”
“Your father had your cell phone traced.”
Well, I hadn’t thought of that.
Note to self: if you ever want to truly run away, ditch the phone.
“I see the wheels turning. Don’t even think about it. Please, don’t ever run off without leaving me a way of finding you.”
Thirty-Seven
Brie - Present
Summer is around the corner, and I honestly can’t wait. Kelsey’s mother made good on her promise, and I have been booked with several catering jobs. It feels great to be making some extra cash, doing something I love. Between that, keeping Cassian, giving lessons at the club, final exams, spending time with Jake, and helping to plan Dawn’s graduation party, I have been so busy. Too busy. Something has to go, and as much as it pains me, I have to talk to Mr. Cloniger because, of all those things, the club is the only one I can let go of.
“Time to pay the piper,” Dawn says as we pull up to the club.
I’m practically hyperventilating in the passenger seat.
“For goodness’ sake, you look like you are about to confess to murder, not quit your part-time job.”
“I just feel horrible, quitting on him. He gave me this job when I really needed it, and I just hate to disappoint him.”
“You are a part-time tennis instructor. It’s not like you are the CFO, leaving him in a bind. Jeez, Brie, I think you are over-inflating your importance to the entire organization.”
I stick my tongue out at her. “You are such a bitch sometimes.”
“I know, right? I have no idea why you guys are still friends with me.”
“I guess we like bitches.”
“Yeah, we do!”
* * *
Mr. Cloniger is very understanding. He said he knew it was coming because I had been turning down more and more private lessons. He also assumed I was spreading myself too thin. He was actually quite happy for me when I told him about the catering, and he said to let him know if I needed an internship in the kitchen down the road because he would be happy to provide a recommendation for me.
After turning in my parking pass and cleaning out my employee locker, I head to the office to get my last paycheck and then to the bar to meet Dawn for lunch. She grabbed us a table while I spoke to Mr. Cloniger.
“How did it go?”
“As well as I could hope. He made it very easy for me.”
“Told you. All that anxiety, for nothing.”
We order food and a couple of waters and sit and chat about the graduation plans.
“So, Mom rented the entire Sonoma Wine Garden for the night. We will have food on the garden patio. The band and dance floor will be in the dining ballroom. The DJ will set up in the bar, which leads out to the ocean deck, and the champagne, desserts, and coffee will be on the Sonoma deck.”
“Wow. She is going all out.”
“Yep. Her only princess is finally graduating. She has to make it the social event of the year.”
“So, what is our budget?”
“We have no budget. We just pick out what we want and charge it to Daddy’s black card.”
“Oh, this is going to be fun.”
“You bet your ass it is. As soon as Kelsey gets here, we are heading out to taste-test every bakery in Santa Monica.”
We finish our food and chat more about the party specifics while we wait for Kelsey. Nicco is supposed to be dropping her off any minute now.
I run to the restroom while Dawn waits for our server, and I see Jake leaving the men’s locker room with another member. I didn’t know he was here. He must have gotten off work early. I head toward him as he turns to his companion and speaks. When I get closer, I see the man’s face, and I freeze. What the fuck? The man looks up. His eyes meet mine, and he grins. The bastard grins.
I turn and take off running through the club. I head straight for the front door and tear toward the parking lot. I don’t even know where I’m going. I just know I have to get far away. Arms grab me from the side, and I scream.
“Whoa. Where are you going? Did you not hear us calling your name?”
Nicco. Oh, thank God it’s Nicco’s voice.
I throw my arms around him.
“Brie, what’s wrong?”
“He is here. He’s here, and he is with Jake.”
“Who is here?” Nicco starts scanning the parking lot.
“I have to get out of here.” I struggle to get out of his hold.
“Stop and talk to me, sis. Who is here?”
I look up at him. “Dante.”
A look of surprise registers on his face.
“Are you sure? It wasn’t just someone who looked like Dante?”
“Who is Dante?” I hear Kelsey asking from behind Nicco.
I am shaking now. “It’s him. I could never confuse him with someone else, Nicco. I will never forget that face.”
“Where are they?” he demands.
“When I saw them, they were headed out of the locker room. Nicco, I have to get out of here.”
He turns to Kelsey. “Take her home. I’ll meet you guys there shortly.”
She nods, and we head to her car as he takes off toward the club. She already has her ear to her phone.
“Hey, it’s me. She is out in the parking lot with me. Nicco is on his way in. Toss him your keys and come get in my car with us. I’m parked to the right of the club, behind the Pro Shop. We have to get Brie out of here. I don’t know, but she’s pretty freaked out. Just get out here, and we will figure it out later.”
She ends the call, and we climb into her car. She doesn’t ask any questions. She just starts the car, and we wait in silence for Dawn to appear. Once she hops in, we speed out of the club parking lot and head toward home.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Kelsey finally asks.
“Yeah. I mean, everything was fine, and you got up to go to the restroom but never returned,” Dawn adds.
“Who is Dante?”
“Dante?”
“Yes, when we were walking into the club, she came flying out the door, and Nicco caught her. She said she saw Jake with someone named Dante, and as soon as the name left her lips, Nicco looked like he was going to rip someone’s head off.”
“So, who is Dante?”
“He is a very bad person from my past in New York,” I confess. “He is not supposed to know where I am. I don’t know how he found me.”
“Is he the rea
son you ran away from home?” Dawn asks cautiously.
“Not really, but he is a part of my life I would like to forget. A part that still scares me.”
“You say he is bad. Is he dangerous?”
“Yes.”
“Well, don’t worry; Nicco will handle it,” Kelsey encourages.
“He was with Jake,” I whisper.
“That doesn’t necessarily mean anything.”
“Yes, it does.”
“You don’t know that.”
But I do. I do know it. There is no way it’s a coincidence. The world doesn’t work that way. Betrayal washes over me. Red-hot betrayal. How did I let this happen to me again? I put my heart out there, just to have it shattered again.
I take my phone out, and I send a text to Jake with three little words.
We are over.
Then, I turn it off, and I climb out of the car. I walk up to our apartment, flanked by my friends.
Once we are inside, Kelsey’s phone starts ringing.
I walk into my room and kick off my shoes. I grab a blanket, and then I head to the living room. The girls are sitting there, watching my every move.
“Nicco says they were gone by the time he got in there. They must have left together.”
“Are you okay?”
“I will be. This isn’t my first rodeo with heartache, and if I could survive the last time, believe me, I can survive anything.”
Honestly, I’m more mad at myself than anyone else. Angry that I let myself fall for Jake. For letting him in. For trusting again. I knew better.
Twenty minutes later, Daniel is at the door.
“Jake has been texting and calling me not stop. He got your text, and he is freaking out,” Daniel says after he settles in and Dawn explains what happened. “I told him to stay at the office, and I would come check out what was going on.” He asks me, “What should I tell him?”
“Nothing. I’m done, Daniel. Just tell him I am done.”
I say my good nights, and I head to bed. When I get to my room and close the door, I stop and look at myself in the mirror hanging on the back of the door.