Nanami must hate her.
Jin pressed the back of her hand against her lips, trying to calm the bile that was rising in her gorge.
“Jin, are you okay?” Xiao asked.
“I’m sorry – about your hand, I’m so sorry – I should never have suggested being a disciple of Salaana...”
Nanami opened her mouth, but almost immediately snapped it shut. She looked away, and Jin felt terrible. “Ah. It’s true, I don’t know how I will manage with just one hand... I suppose–”
To Jin’s shock, Xiao elbowed Nanami. “Don’t tease her! Jin takes everything seriously.”
“Hey, handless woman here!” Nanami elbowed him back – which made Jin realize Xiao was right. Nanami was teasing her.
Nanami looked a bit sheepish as she turned to Jin and said, “Salaaana has been hunting me for millennia. I knew the risk – it was my own pride and eagerness to trick her that made me do it. It’s not your fault.”
Nanami and Xiao’s relationship had changed. Jin wasn’t exactly sure what it was right now. She opened and shut her mouth twice before saying, “Still, if there’s anything I can do...”
Nanami shook her head and waved her remaining hand.
“So Nanami lost a hand,” said Bai slowly. “Is that why the three of you are together? Because of the trouble at the Sun Court?”
“Oh – no,” admitted Jin, a little embarrassed to tell him how her foolishness at theatre had led to her abduction. But of course, Xiao and Nanami already knew.
Jin related the story as they walked to Liushi, and the four of them fell in side by side – Bai, then Jin, then Xiao, and then Nanami. Jin worried that Nanami still seemed a bit upset, but she decided it should wait until they could speak alone.
When she showed Bai the key she had made, he smiled slightly and asked, “Now who’s scattering miraculous artifacts?”
Jin flushed but met his gaze boldly, and said, “Well, I was taught by the best.” Xiao made a gagging sound beside her, and Jin cleared her throat. “I’m sorry I ran away like that.”
Bai shrugged and looked away. “You had a right to be upset. I’m more concerned by the fact someone seemed to know you would do that. Someone who knows you well planned the abduction.” He looked at Nanami and Xiao. “Did you learn anything at the Sun Court?” he asked.
Nanami and Xiao looked at each other, a silent argument going on between them. Jin picked up some of it and crossed her arms angrily. “I agree with Nanami! Of course you should tell me Gang is my father!” Jin let out a deep breath. “I already knew, more or less, anyway.”
Jin glanced at Bai.
“And I also think he was the one who tried to incapacitate me twice. Nanami’s right – he and Neela are the only ones who could easily send someone directly to me, and they are the only ones with access to godsbane.”
“Godsbane?” echoed Bai.
“It’s an herb that grows in the valley where Noran died. It is poisonous to immortals,” Jin explained.
Both Nanami and Xiao made exclamations of surprise – another secret that Jin had given away.
“But Gang didn’t poison the emperor,” put in Xiao. “Gu confessed to me. He did it for his mother.”
Jin stopped walking. “But – no – I... I wanted it to be Salaana, even if that meant he deserved the curse.”
Xiao stopped as well and pulled Jin into a hug. “Me, too.”
“Gu may have cast the curse, but that doesn’t mean Salaana isn’t responsible,” Nanami argued. Jin listened intently as Nanami and Xiao described Guleum’s addiction to dreams and the blood he had traded for them.
Bai shook his head when they finished, saying, “You cannot relieve him of responsibility just because he was influenced by his addiction. A being has to own their choices, even if they were vulnerable when they made them.”
Jin nodded in agreement, though she did feel angry with Salaana for abusing that vulnerability.
She pulled free of Xiao’s hug and began walking again. “I don’t suppose any of this has changed your mind about flying to the Korikami’s Tomb?” she asked Bai.
He flushed slightly and cleared his throat. “No.”
“Because you aren’t sure the curse should be broken.”
“The Underworld was dangerous even before it was full of immortal creatures. It would be good to master your powers more, so why not do it as we travel?”
Anger rose again – maybe not as much as she felt in the theater, but close. “Why can’t you just answer directly?”
“His point is a good one, though,” put in Nanami. “Neither you nor Xiao know much about the immortal creatures. Going there ignorant...” Nanami shuddered.
Jin frowned. “But you and Bai do – unless you aren’t planning on entering the Underworld?”
“I am,” said Bai, “but wouldn’t it be better for you to learn more anyway?”
Jin bit her lip. She wasn’t sure if she trusted him or not. She looked at Xiao, only to find her friend was focused on Nanami.
“Are they really that scary?” asked Xiao. “Tell us about the immortal creatures.”
Nanami laughed. “There are more than a hundred kinds. And not all are scary but – have you ever heard of the Xuezei, for example?”
Jin shook her head, as did Xiao.
“They are blood drinkers – mortal or immortal, they don’t care which. They have fangs and sharp claws and live in packs. When you meet one, you need to prepare yourself for twenty. But they don’t care about each other, only for blood. So you can’t frighten them off – you must kill every single one. They will suck your blood even if they are severely injured – the only way to be sure they’ve died is to behead them or burn them. So their viciousness and numbers make them hard to face. Fire is just about the only effective weapon against them – hunters used to corral them with torches and burn them en masse.
“But at least they are obviously dangerous. So if you met them not knowing what they are, you would know to take precautions. That’s not the case with the Nisei. They are small and beautiful beings that look like butterflies, and they suffocate you in your sleep.” Nanami shook her head. “You and Xiao aren’t ready for the Underworld.”
Chapter 12: How Xiao Realized His Strength
XIAO looked out across the endless blue of the ocean, enjoying the warm salt air and the occasional cool ocean spray. He was leaning against the side of the Yanou, a large junk which they had hired in Liushi. Its white sails stretched like fins to the clear blue sky, and the Yanou sliced through the relatively calm waves at a pace that had mollified Jin after Bai’s refusal to call a cloud. Believing Gang to be tracking them, Jin had banned other immortals from the Yanou, but the four of them hadn’t bothered to hide their immortality from the crew.
Bai’s white hair paired with his young face had garnered their curiosity, and all of them bowed and scraped to their passengers. Nanami handled this the most easily, joking and chatting with them effortlessly. Jin surprised Xiao by being the least approachable, her untouchable beauty awing the crew. The crew was almost as shy around Bai, and it would have been natural for the two of them to fall into each other’s company, but in the days since Bai had found them by the river, Jin and he had watched each other like wild animals – admiration and yearning accompanied by a wariness, as if the other might suddenly attack.
It was driving Xiao crazy – he could tell their feelings had developed over the past month and he wanted to just throw the two of them in a locked room and tell them to have sex, and yet... And yet, it was totally hypocritical of him, for was he not circling Nanami in much the same manner?
Logically, he knew that Jin was aware of their attachment, and he knew she didn’t care. But he felt uncomfortable flirting with Nanami when he had told Jin he wanted a monogamous marriage. After all, they were still engaged. Nanami was also holding back from him – for the same reason?
He was glad he had told none of them about his someti
mes conflicting feelings for Jin. Now that he had seen her again with Bai, he found it surprisingly easy to accept that she and he were only friends. Siblings perhaps, since friends seemed too weak a word. It didn’t matter if Jin made him angry or hurt him; he would always be at her side when she needed him. But he didn’t need to be her lover. Didn’t even want to be. He did, however, want Nanami. If it wasn’t for that cursed betrothal...
A throat cleared next to him, and Xiao turned his head to find Bai leaning beside him, looking over the water.
“Can I help you?”
That cursed brow arched. “I thought perhaps I could help you. Jin asked me to work with you.”
“You mean you actually talked to her?” Xiao mocked.
Death stared him in the eyes. Xiao didn’t believe Bai would hurt him though – it would upset Jin too much. “What is with you? She likes you; you like her. Just apologize and stop this cold war.”
Bai crossed his arms. “Do you want to master your power or not?”
Xiao grimaced. “I’m not so desperate as to accept help from someone who dislikes me.”
Bai’s expression softened just a bit. “I’m sorry if I gave you that impression. It’s not you. I dislike your parents.”
“We have that in common,” Xiao pointed out.
The brow went up again. “I suppose we do at that. They were lousy parents, weren’t they?”
Xiao nodded.
“You’re full of insecurity. Lost, even.”
Xiao turned back to glare at Bai, but the older man didn’t even notice.
“That makes me nervous. You’re too powerful not to have a purpose, a sense of self.”
“So you dislike me because I have mommy and daddy issues? You think I’m weak?”
Bai finally seemed to realize that he had been rude. “Well–”
“I think I’m stronger than you. Because I love people. I love my worshippers, I love Jin, I love Neela, I love–” Xiao paused, and forced himself not to look toward the room, where he knew Nanami was.
“Anyway, I may have issues, but at least I’m not afraid I’ll go batshit crazy if the people I love die. I’ll handle it. I’ll mourn and try to honor their memories. How about that?”
Bai’s lips twisted. “Do you want to practice your powers or not?”
Xiao nearly growled. “Yeah! Yeah, I do, curse it. I want to make magic keys that open any lock.”
Bai blinked stupidly. Xiao far preferred it to the brow arch. “Very well.”
The next two hours were extremely frustrating as Bai tried to teach Xiao how to extend his will over shadows on the boat and create something.
“Even just a scrap of cloth would be fine,” Bai said, for the millionth time, as if Xiao wasn’t already feeling like a complete dolt.
Xiao scowled. “It just doesn’t make sense to me. Why on earth should I have dominion over a shadow?”
“Because your father was a shadow.”
“Well, that would explain why I could become a shadow, not why I could manipulate one.”
Bai scowled and pressed his fist to his mouth, as if trying to hold in an expletive. But a moment later his face relaxed.
“You change yourself all the time, don’t you?”
Xiao shifted uncomfortably. He had to admit, he could understand why Aka hadn’t liked Bai. The man’s constant observations cut a little too close to the core.
Bai stood up, apparently oblivious to Xiao’s discomfort. “Do you want to become a crow?”
Xiao stood as well. He should have laughed; how could he become a bird? “Sure.”
“Then follow me.” Suddenly there was a pure white seagull – only its beak and eyes were gray – sitting on the side of the ship.
Xiao couldn’t have explained how he knew what to do, but he leapt into the air as a man and when he landed on the ship’s side, he was a crow. He spread his wings, admiring how the light glinted violet off the black feathers. There was a loud exclamation behind him, and Xiao cocked his head to find three crew members prostrate on the deck. Xiao let out a caw of delight and launched himself off the ship with a hop and a flap.
Bai followed him within moments. They ascended rapidly, and Xiao gloried in how easy it was to fly. He was a crow; it was as if he had been a crow his whole life. He lost track of time, the wind buoying him up and carrying away all the worries of Xiao-the-man.
Bai began to fly closer to the water, and at first Xiao thought he was planning on returning to the Yanou. But then the gull became a large white dugong, bigger than Bai himself. The gentle sea mammal disappeared into the water. Real ones are grayer than that, Xiao mused. Intrigued, he flew lower, picturing the black and white whales that liked to eat dugongs. He then systematically turned the white markings lavender in his mind.
He slipped into the water, a keen and powerful predator. He surfaced to breathe, then dove deep chasing the white dugong, which gleamed in the murky sea.
Remembering how swiftly Bai had defeated him in the garden, Xiao decided to turn the tables on him and began to harry Bai.
He had but touched his nose to the dugong’s side when he felt Bai’s power seize him securely. They teleported.
When they re-emerged in the world, they were both men, and they were free-falling through open air. Xiao twisted around and spotted the Yanou below him. He looked at Bai, wondering if they were fighting for real, but Bai just raised his eyebrows calmly.
So Xiao grabbed Bai and tried to teleport back to the ship.
To his surprise, Bai fought the teleport. Stubbornly, Xiao pulled more and more power, forcing the other man to his will. And to his shock it worked – he really was more powerful than Bai. The last thing he saw before they went between was Bai smiling and nodding.
NANAMI woke slowly, fighting the lull of a gentle swaying. She was somewhere dark and warm – ah, that’s right, the Yanou. She swung her feet out of her hammock, and then it took her minute longer to stand – it had been a very long time since Nanami had been at sea.
The three other hammocks that the small room held were all neatly stored away, so the others must have awoken already. Nanami folded her hammock against a post and was about to go above decks to find her companions when she noticed a large kerchief of Jin’s bundled on the floor.
She wouldn’t leave the key in that, would she?
Nanami hesitated a moment, then told herself, I had better check... Jin is pretty careless about what she leaves around. What if one of the crew took it?
Awkwardly, Nanami loosed the knotted silk with one hand and spread the large square out. There was a motley collection inside – a spare breast cover and underpants, a pure blue comb, several coins... Nanami chuckled at the spread. Immortals who were used to making whatever they wanted, like Bai and her, didn’t bother carrying bags as they travelled. Bai even had the neat trick of shrinking anything he wanted to carry and hiding it in his robes, as he had with his sword, shield, and guzheng.
Nanami pushed the breast cover aside, and her breath caught. She really did leave it.
Reverently, she picked up the key and turned it in her fingers.
The door to the room flew open, banging into the wall. “Xiao just became a bird! Come and see!” Jin was practically bouncing with excitement.
Quickly, Nanami tried to restore the silk bundle, but she was too slow with only one hand.
“What are you doing? You – you’re stealing my key?”
“No, no, it just came untied, so I was trying to neaten things up–”
“Don’t. Lie. To. Me.”
Jin pulled the key from the pile, and continued, almost snarling, “I can hear your thoughts. Why would you steal it? I would have given it to you, if you had asked.”
Nanami stood slowly. “I shouldn’t have opened your things. That was rude. I really wanted to see the key again. I wasn’t going to steal it...”
“You were thinking about it. So much for not stealing for yourself. If t
his is how you treat the people that care about you, I can see why your family sent you away!”
Nanami pulled back. It felt like Jin had slapped her. Then she leaned forward. “I’d rather be sent away than spend my life trying to please terrible people. Your favorite brother burned an entire city to the ground! You watched him murder thousands of mortals, and you still want to be friends with him? Aren’t you just a little too eager to please others?”
Jin inhaled sharply, and her already pale face went white. “At least he didn’t betray me! Your sister turned you in to justice!”
Nanami scoffed. “No – your brother didn’t betray you – oh, because he’s not your brother at all! He cuckolded his own father and then avoided his daughter her whole life!” A little voice inside told Nanami that she should stop, but she was too angry. She remembered how Xiao had hugged Jin as soon as they saw her again, and how he had given Jin his blood so she could call him from anywhere. “I guess that’s why you think you can ignore others’ feelings – you’ve been playing with Xiao this whole time! He loves you, but you openly flirt with the First!”
Jin took a step closer to Nanami, so they were only a handspan apart. “Openly flirting? You’ve been interested in Xiao since the first day you met him! You were jealous of me even though I freed you from his spell. I tried to be your friend, but you were really only sticking around to seduce my betrothed, right?”
“At least I stand a chance! Xiao actually likes me! You’re clinging to the First when you’re just a little girl who reminds him of his lost love!”
Jin’s face had changed from white to red. “But he doesn’t belong to someone else! At least I’m not a thief who can’t even change her ways after she loses a hand!”
Before she realized what she was doing, Nanami raised her arm to strike Jin – but someone caught it. Nanami whipped around and wanted to die. Xiao was holding both her and Jin, Bai behind him.
“Let’s calm down,” he suggested soothingly. “You are very different people, but you each have your own strengths–”
Vows of Gold and Laughter (The Immortal Beings Book 1) Page 26