by C. T. Adams
Biting her lip and nodding seemed to help her get back to a good place. “Yes. Yes, of course. Today’s a good, happy day. Do I smell happy?”
I waggled my hand. “Mostly. You smell a little sad, but you can blame it on being sick, or just be honest. I think she’d be happier that you’re sad for her than a blank slate. And complete joy would be a lie too. She’d smell right through it.”
The sigh she let out was a little frustrated. I knew the feeling. “You know, life was a lot simpler when I didn’t have to worry about whether my face matched my emotional scent. That’s hard.”
I snorted and pulled the gloves back on. They were starting to fit really well, like a second skin. “Tell me about it. I’ve got a tough decision coming up and someone’s going to be pissed with me no matter what I decide. I’d love to be able to lie to one or the other.”
Now her face and scent matched. They were concerned for me. “Anything I can do to help?”
“Sure!” I lied. “Just tell me whether I should let the men who sliced the crap out of Carmine get away with it, or whether to violate Sazi law and go kill them.” She gave a little laugh until I didn’t return it. It took a few seconds of staring at my hard, angry eyes before she realized I wasn’t kidding.
“Carmine’s been hurt? Will he be okay?”
I shrugged and had to turn away to stare out the window. “Dunno. Nobody knows. His kidneys failed and Linda says he’s been cut up worse than she’s ever seen—and she’s seen some pretty awful things. He’s in a hospital here in Denver apparently, but she says he doesn’t want to see me. He just wants me to go make it right. There’s only one thing he means when he says that.”
Her hand flew to my arm and her fingers dug in tighter than I’d ever felt them manage. Was this part of the new stuff, or was she really that worried? “They’ll kill you, Tony. Wolven will track you down and kill you.”
“And so will my old friends if I don’t. Louis and Sal know I’m still alive. If Carmine dies and I let it go—”
She buried her head against my chest, and this time it wasn’t with sex on her mind. “Oh, God. Tony, what are you going to do?”
I shook my head and ran my fingers through her cropped ‘do, getting the feel of the new length. “I don’t know. I really don’t. It was my life for a long time, Sue. I can’t let it go that easily. Linda’s hurting and so is Babs. No doubt the guys are in limbo, waiting for Carmine to come back from what they think is a vacation. If he doesn’t, and this new gang moves in—” I let the thought trail off. It used to be her hometown too. I knew she didn’t want it to go to war any more than I did. “No easy answers, just like everything in my life.”
She looked up and I didn’t know what, or who, the tears rolling down her face were meant for. But they glistened and made her green eyes seem eerily bright. “Well, there’s at least one easy answer. I love you, and I’ll stand by you. I know I’ve always hated what you did . . . that you took lives. But those were choices, plain business. Carmine and Linda, though . . . they’re family. At least as close as we both have now. Even the Chicago pack is a distant second. You do what you need to do, and whatever happens—”
I nodded, once. She was sounding strong and confident, which wasn’t really like her. But I couldn’t deny I liked it. “Happens.” I kissed her again, just a light brush of lips to seal the deal. Talking to her had pretty much made up my mind, but I didn’t think Lucas was going to like the answer. In fact, he might just put me down before I could even leave the clinic. But I had to try to avenge Carmine, and that’s the best I could do.
We left the room hand in hand, her grip tight in mine, and everything sort of happened at once. Linda and Babs were just leaving an exam room, and Babs was tugging down the shirt over her belly. She and Linda spotted Sue and they did a double squeal and raced forward. Sue’s joy wasn’t faked as she released me and headed their way.
At the same moment, Lucas, Charles, and Ahmad opened the door to an elegant office that I’d seen in my head before when I got a hindsight flashback from Lucas. It was either his office or the person who owned it had remarkably similar taste in furnishings. They spotted me and Lucas twitched his finger for me to join them before entering the next room over to grab another chair. But Amber stopped me before I could reach the room. “I need to check you over before I remove the shield over Sue.” Lucas started to protest, but she raised a hand to stop him. “No. This is medical. It comes before enforcement and you know it. I’ll be five minutes. No more.”
Then she walked away and expected me to follow. Sometimes it’s better to go with the devil you don’t know, so I tagged along after her.
I’d never actually been examined by a Sazi physician when I was conscious, so I didn’t quite know what to expect. She wore a stethoscope, but apparently it was ornamental. Instead of tucking the pieces in her ears, she just placed a hand on my chest. A weird sensation flowed through me. It wasn’t erotic by any means, but it didn’t really hurt either. “Okay, so am I supposed to cough or something?”
Amber let out a frustrated sound. “You’re supposed to stay quiet, so I can listen.” I shrugged, still not sure what she was listening for. After a few seconds, she moved her hand to my forehead, like she was feeling for a temperature. The same weird sensation made my scalp tingle. Several smart-aleck remarks like So, do I feel as hot as you look? came to mind, but I kept them to myself. She didn’t seem like she was in a mood for banter.
She blew upward to move the red-gold hair from her eyes in a practiced motion. “Look, I know you’re getting frustrated that I’m not talking, but I told them five minutes. Charles is testy enough today without me wasting their time. I just need to be sure that you’re capable of doing what they want before I let you go talk to them. But you seem remarkably healthy for a three-day. Most aren’t as sturdy as you seem to be. But Lucas said you were bleeding from the mouth earlier. What was that about?”
I shrugged. “Not a clue. I was here, not there.”
She lowered her hand, along with her eyebrows, and leaned against the wall next to the exam table where I was sitting. “Explain.”
So I did. It didn’t take long. I’m good at brevity. “So I pulled on Ahmad’s power to stop the stinging. It worked, but I don’t know if it screwed up your ritual. She seems fine, so I’m guessing not.”
“Actually, she’s better than fine, which has been confusing all of us. Her healing ability has gone through the roof, her blood seems to have similar magical properties to a Sazi, and she’s had a slight change of personality—for the better. More confidence, stronger will, more cheerful. You have second sight, right? Did you by chance notice if she has an aura?”
Did I even look? No, surely I would have remembered that. “I was paying a lot of attention to her appearance, so I definitely would have remembered. She didn’t.”
Amber nodded. “I’ll have to think about what you did, try to figure out how it changed what we were attempting.” She scrawled some illegible notes on a pad and then tucked the pen behind her ear. “Okay, I’m willing to give this a try. But I want you to call me immediately if you start to feel strange or if you can’t remember periods of time.”
I considered asking the obvious question about how I could call her to report a loss of memory, if I didn’t remember—duh. But I didn’t, because I was just anxious to try out the new Sue in my head. If one ritual could manage what a year of therapy couldn’t I’d be ecstatic.
“For the moment,” she added with her hand on the exam room door. “Keep up your shields. Let them down slowly, over the course of the next twelve hours or so. I’m going to keep her here, under observation, for another day. I know you’ll be elsewhere, but I want you to check in. On the phone, please, and personally. I want to hear your voice answer intelligent questions before I release her.”
“Particle physics or simple chaos theory? Will I have to study first?” I couldn’t help it. She left herself wide open.
She wrinkled her nose, making
the few freckles scattered on it more obvious. “Cute. Let’s just stick with your name, the date, the current president—that sort of thing. We can always make it more challenging later if you think you’re up to sparring with me.”
“Can I answer the last president instead? It’s less painful.”
She just rolled her eyes. “I think you’re fine for now. Just don’t try to remove your shields until after they’re done talking to you. You’ll need your full attention for that. I don’t want you distracted. If you decide you want to go ahead with their plan, we’ll talk more.”
That got me curious, so I skipped any more banter and just nodded. We left the exam room and I headed down the hall to the closed door where they were waiting for me. But a whispered, “Psst. Mr. Davis?” made me turn my head as I was passing one of the room doors.
It was Liz. She was dressed in a hospital gown, but it wasn’t one of the ones that tied in back. It was more like a caftan or housedress, so she was fully covered. “Yes?”
“A couple of people were talking and I think I heard that you were once just a regular human, like me. Is that true?”
I nodded and walked a little closer to her room, but made sure to stay well out of range of what might be considered improper. Yeah, she might be of age, but she still felt like a kid to me for some reason. Maybe it was her scent, which was similar to baby powder with cornstarch, or maybe it was that pearlescent pink aura. “Yep. You heard right. I was attacked by a werewolf and got brought over to this by force. But that’s not quite like you. You actually have the genes. You just didn’t turn until late.”
“But I’ve never known any other life. This is all confusing me, and I don’t know what to expect. What’s going to happen to me when the sun goes down?” She didn’t smell afraid, per se. More curious and a little excited about the prospect of something entirely new.
Wow. I didn’t know if I was the right person to answer that question. “Geez, Liz. That’s a tough one. It’s different for every person. But for me, it hurts. Shifting forms hurts a lot. But then, I’m not one of the powerful ones. I think you are . . . or will be. For alphas, it doesn’t hurt at all. They just think about it and it happens. No fuss, no muss. After that, you’ll do what your animal wants you to do.”
She was nodding, taking it all in. I couldn’t imagine why she’d trust me, except that I tend not to lie . . . except when I do. But there was no reason to lie right now. “That’s the toughest part, because animals don’t have morals or regrets. You’ll find that things seem very simple when you’re in animal form. You have a need, you fill it. But it’s the memories you have to deal with—especially if you wind up an alpha. I think I was happier not remembering the stuff I did. I didn’t for the better part of a year, before I met my wife. Mating with her made things a lot better, but more difficult too. But I was always a hunter, so stuff hasn’t bothered me as much as it does others. Like, can you look at a packet of hamburger in the store and think about, really think about where it came from?”
Liz shrugged and leaned against the doorway, tucking one bare foot behind the other. “Sure. I grew up around ranchers. I’ve watched the slaughter process. It’s not pretty, but it’s necessary.” No black pepper, so she wasn’t fibbing.
“Then you’ll do better than most. The thing is, you’re going to have to keep an open mind and not blame yourself for things you do while you’re learning how to control yourself. If you really did take out the water tower . . . and it’s a good bet you did, you can’t beat yourself up. Even if someone dies in the process. That’s the real trick with all this supernatural stuff. Things die so we can live.” I put a gloved hand on her shoulder. “You come to terms with that, and you’ll be fine.”
She looked at me for a long moment, deep in thought. “And you really were a hit man? You don’t seem the type. You seem . . . normal, and pretty smart.”
I couldn’t help but smile, even though it was probably darker than she expected. “I am. Both. Most of us tend to look normal . . . average. Someone you’d completely forget in a crowd. And it’s not ‘were’ a hit man. Present tense, kiddo. Always present tense.” I ruffled her hair on the way past and caught sight of her in the convex mirror at the end of the hallway. She was staring after me with a cocked head and confused expression.
LUCAS’S OFFICE DOOR was closed, but I could hear the three of them chatting about the weather in various parts of the world as I raised my hand to knock, but I didn’t have to. It went silent before my knuckle hit the wood and Lucas spoke quietly. “Come in, Tony.”
I walked through the doorway and as I closed it behind me, there was pressure against it that made it hard to close. I hadn’t noticed it when I walked through, but apparently there was a shield of magic that swallowed the entrance. It was clear and shimmery, like the finest crystal, but cool to the touch. I’d never noticed that Charles Wingate, the Chief Justice of the council had much of a glow about him, and maybe this was why. It’s not that it’s not there, I just can’t see it. But that’s okay, because the other two were bleeding enough energy that it felt like standing next to a generator station. The air felt . . . heavy, thick enough with power to make my skin crawl and burn.
Charles looked just the same, sitting in the chair farthest in the corner. He has that serene confidence of someone who doesn’t have anything to prove to anyone. On most people, the tiny dark eyes over a large nose would look odd and out of proportion. But it really doesn’t on him. The eyes hold so much intelligence, so many years, that you just sort of forget to notice anything else. I’m told that in his animal form, which is a polar bear, he can stand flat-footed and look in a second-story window. I’d sort of like to see that, because it was hard to imagine from looking at him. He’s broad across, built as solid as a tank, but he’s not all that tall. Maybe six foot one.
“Good to see you again, Tony. How have your lessons been coming?” Charles is the one who set it up for me to train with Aspen. He’s another seer, like me and her. I presume his talent is foresight, but he might be able to do other stuff too. Like Lucas, he doesn’t give much away.
“We both got interrupted, so we agreed to meet back up after the holidays. But my shields are stable, and I’m able to manipulate a hindsight vision enough to extract information. So, that’s something.”
He nodded, his hands clasped over his tailored vest like a modern Buddha. A statue with a highbrow British accent. “Excellent. Hopefully you’ve been of use to Lucas in closing out old files?”
Lucas spoke, his voice filled with dry humor. “He thinks my handwriting on old files was sloppy.”
I shrugged and planted myself in the empty high-back chair with tooled red leather upholstery. It put me right next to Ahmad, but there wasn’t much I could do about that, and so far he was ignoring my existence as he scanned through a file folder thick with papers. “It is. Tough enough to go through cold cases without having to decipher every other word.”
Lucas snorted and rolled his glowing dark eyes. “Next file you work on, you’ll get the same quill and ink bottle to work with . . . by candlelight, without a smooth surface. If your handwriting’s legible, you can complain all you like.”
I shrugged again, not disagreeing, but not accepting the challenge either. It was enough that he felt he proved his point, although I wouldn’t be at all surprised to find a quill and bottle on my desk, with all my ballpoints missing, next time I sat down. I should probably practice. I’d love to see his face if I could manage it.
“Can we get on with this, gentlemen? I have to get back before they have too much time to think or compare notes.” Ahmad’s tone was unusually respectful. Maybe it was because Charles was in the room, but I hadn’t noticed that it had ever stopped him from being an asshole before.
Lucas waved him on. “This is your show.” Then he turned his eyes to me. “Tony, this is your official debriefing of the rescue operation. Just answer all the questions as honestly and completely as you can and this will be short.”
I raised my brows. I’d never had a debriefing done before with this many council members. I didn’t mind, exactly, but I was getting the impression that there was something big going on. “Are we being taped?” I’m not big on recorded conversations.
Ahmad looked at me like I was an insect that needed to be squished and opened his mouth—probably to say something offensive or insulting. But Charles raised a placating hand. “No. Nothing will be taped. Only the three of us will be privy to your answers. There’s also no question of punishment, before you ask. We only need information and it seems to reside strictly in your memories.”
He was right. That was going to have been my next question, but since we were just chatting, I leaned back and rested my elbows on the cool padded arms. “Fine. Fire away.”
Ahmad flipped to the first sticky note tab in the sheaf of papers. “When I arrived on the scene, you were saying you were surprised, and you were looking down at the prisoners being taken to the helicopter. What surprised you?”
I dipped my head in acknowledgment. “First, that there were two prisoners—we were expecting one. Second, that the second prisoner was the councilwoman for the raptors, Angelique Calibria. We hadn’t been informed that she was anywhere in the area. For that matter, we didn’t know you’d be there either.”
Another flip, another sticky. “And how did you recognize the councilwoman? Had you met her before?”
I nodded again. He, Charles, and Lucas knew full well where and how I met her, since they were there too. But I answered anyway. “Yes. At the winter council meeting in Chicago. I was working outside security when she arrived and Lucas identified her to me.”
The conversation went on the same for the next half hour or so, every question wrapping just a little deeper into the situation than the one before. At last we finally got to the meat of why I was in the room when Ahmad said, “Explain the circumstances that allowed you to see my actions after we parted.”