by Jillian Neal
Confusion and a slight sense of panic kept Austin from sleeping. He’d never been in love before. He’d heard the entire lineage of Camden men tell the stories about how they knew as soon as they saw the girl that she was the one. His parents would tell anyone willing to listen their story of fated love. He reviewed the tales in his head once again.
Did people really fall in love in one split second? Is that what he was in? It took me about eight seconds to know I was full of shit. Scott’s words ricocheted around his head.
Austin shifted slightly, careful to keep Summer tucked safely against him. It was where she belonged. That thought reinforced the others. Okay, so maybe he was in love. That didn’t mean he had to give up the rodeo. Hell, she grew up with a daddy in the rodeo, and she was a barrel racer. She knew how it all worked. They could travel together.
That isn’t what she wants. He wasn’t certain how he knew that, but he did. Same way he knew what to say to make her blush, knew where to kiss and touch her, knew how to ply her skin and where to suck her to make her come, knew what to say to make her wetter, and how to argue with her just enough to give her the opportunity to show off her sexy stubborn side when that’s what she needed.
Sleep continued to elude him. So, if he was in love, what happened next? His dad had never filled him in on that portion of the story. How had he gotten his mom out of that car and into his arms permanently? Maybe Austin should ask.
Summer’s sweet breaths whispered through his chest hair. He grinned and tucked her closer still. She was so beautiful, and the perfect mix of sweet and sinful. His spiteful little vixen when that’s what he wanted, and sweet as an angel when that’s what he needed. Her frantic worry over him before he climbed on that bull added to his sense of completeness.
He hadn’t fully admitted to himself that she was what he’d been looking for all this time, until he’d pressed his cock inside of her and made them one. Then he knew. There was no more denial. She stripped away all of his bravado and stupidity. She reached in his soul and touched the fear and pain he refused to ever acknowledge. The terror that he’d killed his best friend. The fear he was a disappointment to his family. The confusion over who the hell he really was and why he was still chasing a buckle that meant less and less to him by the moment. It all evaporated at her touch. She didn’t heal him; no, it was as if those blistered lashes on his soul never existed at all when he was with her.
I kept trying to tell you it wasn’t about the buckle, Max’s voice echoed against the recesses of his mind. It had done that since the day of his funeral. Austin had never told anyone he could still hear Max, but sometimes he swore Max was doing his damnedest to get Austin where he was supposed to be going.
Before he could get lost in all of that, a loud knock sounded on his hotel room door. What the fucking hell? Summer didn’t even stir. Sweet baby. He couldn’t help but grin at his own work as he eased out from under her, tucked the covers softly around her, and slung on his jeans.
“What the fuck?” he hissed as he edged the door open, trying to keep the light from the hallway from disturbing his baby, contented in his bed.
Brant Preston glared at him, holding a yawning baby J.J., who was trying to go back to sleep on his father’s shoulder. Brant tensed, lifting his shoulder to stop J.J.’s efforts. Fury shot through Austin.
“Where’s Summer?” Brant huffed.
“Fast asleep in my bed. She’s worn out.” Austin narrowed his eyes, waiting on Brant to understand exactly what he was implying.
“She needs to take him. He’s sick or something. He was crying. It’s her job to take care of him when I’m busy, and I don’t want him back ‘til after Cheyenne. I’ve got stuff to do.”
Austin studied the baby. No sign of tears. He was breathing steady, looked comfy in the pajamas he was wearing. His confused lengthy blinks were telling. He hadn’t been crying. He’d been woken up.
“He wasn’t crying, and she’s been trying to take care of him, but you and mama won’t let her. You woke him up, didn’t you? Why? To get back at her for being with me? Did it really take you until one in the morning to come up with this brilliant plan? You’re quick, Preston.”
“Just get Summer.”
“I don’t think so, brain-boy.” Austin considered. Summer swore that Brant would do something to get back at him for his goading about the two of them. He wouldn’t put anything past Brant. Leaning back in the room, he grabbed his cell phone.
“What are you doing?” Brant demanded.
“Not being a dumbass. You should give it a try sometime. You want Summer to take the little guy for an extra week, then you call my cell phone and say that to my voicemail. I like to keep you from being the douchebag you are whenever I can. I want legal proof to make sure you’re not gonna pull some shit trying to get her in trouble.”
Simpering, Brant thrust J.J. into Austin’s arms. He cradled the little guy on his shoulder and swayed him quite naturally. J.J. yawned and then tucked his head against Austin’s neck. There, that wasn’t too difficult. Maybe he could figure this out.
Austin switched the ringer off on his phone and stood listening to Brant stupidly explain that he’d given Summer permission to keep her own kid until the end of Cheyenne and not to bother him with J.J. When he ended the call, he edged to the side, trying to see into the hotel room, Austin moved with him, blocking anything from his view with the expanse of his chest. “She’s mine, Preston. You don’t get to see her like that anymore. It’s all mine. For my eyes only.”
“Good luck shacking up with my wife while you’re babysitting my kid.” Brant gestured to J.J. Austin longed to deck him again. The sweet kid in his arms was all that kept him from burying his fist in Brant’s smug face.
“Leave.” Austin spun and let the door close behind him. Staring down at J.J., he debated. Summer had spent the last six months sleeping in her truck or in hotel hallways off and on. She’d been exhausted long before he’d fucked her thoroughly. He wouldn’t wake her up unless he couldn’t figure something out. Currently, J.J. was sucking his thumb and working his way back to sleep. He seemed quite content with Austin.
Smiling at that, he settled in a chair and rocked J.J. back and forth gently. “Your daddy is an asshat.” He cringed. “Okay, forget I said that.” Talking bad about the kid’s dad. Not cool, Camden. “So, listen,” he whispered, “I’m kind of crazy about your mama. Think maybe we could share her? You can teach me whatever I need to know. I’ll do anything you need, even the diaper thing, but fair warning, I don’t have a lot of experience with that, so if you could wait ‘til mornin’, I’d be much obliged. I’ll take good care of you both, I swear. I’m good at trials by fire. That’s how I ended up bull riding. You just give me a shot, and we’ll see if we can’t talk mama into giving me one. Deal?”
J.J. made a soft sigh and then spoke a few quiet, gurgled sounds that Austin took to mean, “Deal.” When “ma-ma” came out in broken syllables next, Austin grinned. “That’s right. Mama’s asleep over there. How about you and I go camp out with her?”
Standing, Austin eased back to the bed and arranged J.J. on his chest. Keeping one arm on the baby and wrapping the other protectively around Summer, his mind settled finally, and he fell sound asleep.
Chapter Eight
Blinking repeatedly, Summer tried to bring the image before her into focus. She was obviously still dreaming. She couldn’t possibly be staring at her sweet baby boy cuddled up on Austin Camden’s bare chest, both of them sound asleep. The perfection of the picture was almost more than she could stand.
She allowed herself one moment to imagine it, and since it was her fantasy, she ran wild with it. A family. Austin with his arm around her, standing on a porch somewhere, watching J.J. play in the grass. Maybe another one on the way. The dream spun again. Austin’s hand on her round belly, smiling at her with pride. His lips kissing her swell, then looking up at her, and promising to love her forever.
The pain of something she could never hav
e shattered the imagery her mind conjured with far too much ease. Unable to come up with something more creative, she reached down and pinched her own thigh. Ouch. Okay, I’m not dreaming. Scooting upwards in the bed, she covered her exposed breasts with the sheets and blankets and contemplated whom to awaken first.
Hazy sunshine was just coming up over the mountains and warming the town of Cody. Where was Brant? How did J.J. get there? And how was he in bed with her and Austin? Leaning, she brushed a kiss over J.J.’s plump cheek and then one on Austin’s.
Austin’s eyes blinked open. Almost instinctively, he gasped and checked J.J. on his chest. Relaxing after he was sure the baby was fine, he planted a kiss on his head and then gifted Summer with one of his devastatingly gorgeous grins. “Mornin’ sunshine.”
In that moment, she knew she was falling completely hopelessly in love with the man gently cradling her baby boy. “Mornin’. How exactly did you get my son?”
“Well,” Austin yawned and readjusted, carefully keeping J.J. from being jostled, “Brant showed up here at 1:00 AM demanding to see you. I politely told him to fuck off.” He cringed and glanced down at the baby. “Is it okay to say that in front of him?” He looked so terrified, Summer giggled. She brushed another kiss on his cheek.
“Maybe just try to keep it to a minimum.”
“No problem. Anyway, Brant was pissed you were with me and used J.J. as an excuse to interrupt us. Don’t worry. He’s not gonna pull anything. I made him leave a voicemail on my phone saying he was leaving J.J. with us and I also got him to say that he didn’t want him back until after Cheyenne. We get him an extra week. I wanted you to rest, so little man and I chatted for a few then we went to sleep.”
Austin’s precautions and care warmed her entire being. Emotion cinched her throat. Swallowing harshly, she threw her arms around both of them. “He said that? He said I could have him for all of Cheyenne?”
Austin nodded, his grin expanding the width of his face.
“Thank you. You’re amazing, you know that?”
Chuckling, he looked very pleased with her assessment.
“I told you Brant would do something,” she sighed.
“He brought you J.J., and you just told me I was amazing. I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen you smiling this big. If this was his idea of revenge, he’s dumber than I thought.”
“Does Jean know Brant brought him here?”
“Going with Jean is Brant’s mama?”
“Yeah,” Summer nearly gagged.
“No idea, sugar. Not worried about it if she does. Having both of you in my arms is pretty damn perfect way to wake up.” Another cringe creased his forehead. “Got to get better about cursing.”
“Do you really mean that?”
“About cursing?”
“No,” Summer rolled her eyes, “about holding me and J.J.”
“Hell yeah. Dammit, what is wrong with me? You may have to wash my mouth out with soap like my mama used to.”
Summer doubled over, laughing hysterically. She couldn’t think of anything more perfect either, and that should have scared her to death. But for the first time in a long time, she could locate no fear.
Her laughter woke J.J., whose bottom lip protruded as he worked his way into a wail.
“Oh, I’m sorry, buddy. Come here.” Summer lifted him from Austin’s chest. He hugged her tightly, making every single confusing thing in her world settle. “Mama’s got you.”
Austin stared at her. The customary heat was in his eyes, but something about it was different that morning.
“What?” Summer somehow felt exposed.
“You’re so beautiful.” He leaned and brandished her mouth with a kiss that J.J. interrupted a moment later by latching his tiny hand onto Austin’s morning stubble and taking a tight hold.
Laughing, Austin eased J.J.’s hand away. “Hey, man, we had a deal. You have to let me kiss her if we’re gonna get her to give me a chance.”
“You made a deal with J.J.?” Try though she might, she could not order the stupid grin from her own face. Elation bubbled in her stomach and sheer bliss radiated throughout her body.
“Yep, and I meant what I was saying. You’re so damn beautiful. The way you are with him and then the way you are with me. I’m fallin’ hard, woman.”
The way he just said what he was thinking always threw her for a loop. Finding it much easier to talk with her son, whom she’d missed desperately for the last week, she situated him in her lap while she reclined back against the pillows. “And you, little man, what are you doing making deals with Austin? He’s a slick rodeo cowboy. What did Mama tell you about those? Nothing but trouble.”
“Don’t tell him that.” Austin sounded genuinely offended.
Shocked, Summer lifted her gaze from her son’s hopeful blue eyes to Austin’s onyx black ones. “I’m sorry. I was just kidding.”
“No, you weren’t, but we’ll talk about that later. We need to get packed. I’m guessing the normal six-hour drive will be a good bit longer with little man on board.”
“Austin, I’m driving J.J and myself to Cheyenne.”
“In that piece of shit truck Brant lets you drive? Not on my watch, darlin’. As much as it pains me to say this, get your sexy nakedness out of my bed, and let’s hit the road.”
Rolling her eyes, Summer made little effort to quell her temper. “Brant does not let me do anything, cowboy. I’ll do whatever the hell I want, and before I do anything else I need to change J.J.’s diaper. Did my idiot ex-husband bring his diaper bag?”
“So glad you cursed in front of him, too. Makes me feel better. Your idiot ex left me nothing but the little man, and Brant may not get a say anymore, but I do. You’re not driving that truck from Cody to Cheyenne, through a half-dozen mountain ranges where if you break down in the middle of nowhere the only thing that might find you is a grizzly, or a mountain lion, and his friend the coyot’. That is, if you don’t stumble up on a rattler while you’re trying to carry J.J. to find a human being that you ain’t gonna find. Now, you hang tight, I’ll go find Brant and get J.J.’s stuff, then we’ll get some breakfast, and be on our way. I have to get registered tonight and do the cattle drive thing tomorrow morning.”
Wishing she could stand up to argue with him, Summer fumed. She was naked, and Austin was between her and her tack bag. “At what point in all of this,” she gestured between herself and the broad hunk of man smirking at her with his arms crossed over his chest, looking ridiculously gorgeous with his rumpled hair, wearing nothing but low slung Wranglers, which only made her more irritated, “did you decide you were the boss of me?”
“You sure as hell didn’t seem to mind last night, sugar. Simmer down. You can yell at me some more when I get back.” With that he swooped in and dropped a kiss on the top of her head. She swatted his direction, but he grabbed a t-shirt and ducked out of the way and escaped out the door.
“Ugh, he is so infuriating!” she huffed.
J.J. belly laughed at her outright then attempted to mimic her growl. He gave her a drooly kiss and set those blue eyes on her. He always looked at her like he could see all the way down into her soul. She assumed he probably could. After all, he was the only person who’d ever really held her heart. If she hadn’t already been worried about making the trip in her truck, she might’ve been able to really be angry. As it stood, spending hours and hours with Austin, having his undivided attention, sounded like heaven.
“So, he’s got you in on this gig too, huh? Sold mama out, didn’t you?” She fanned kisses all over his cheeks, making him giggle again. “And I know, he’s also sweet, and caring, and kind, and strong, and he took such good care of you … and he takes really good care of me in every possible way.” Standing, she set J.J. on the carpet so he could crawl around while she got dressed. In no time at all he was using her legs to pull himself up to a standing position. “What am I supposed to do, J? I can’t fall in love. I don’t even know how to do that. I have to take care of you, and
you are not growing up on the rodeo circuit. No way. I’m gonna get us a little house, maybe a little tract of land. I can work at one of those horseback riding places. I could teach kids to ride and then you could learn, too. Maybe out in Nashville, or somewhere nice like that. Somewhere far, far away from Dallas. I’ll make us a little money, and we’ll be happy. Just the two of us.” Even if you get primary custody, Brant will still get to see him. Two weeks in the summer and two weeks at Christmas, just the way you grew up. She tried so hard to make herself believe that happiness was on their horizon, but when she considered life without Austin, her chest ached. Her bones felt hollow. She’d known him three days. How the hell had this happened? When Brant has J.J. you’ll be all alone. Without Austin in the room with her, the fear returned with a vengeance.
“Open the door, motherfucker,” Austin hissed through his teeth as he continued to pound on Brant’s hotel room door.
Just as he was contemplating breaking the damn thing down, it swung open. Mrs. Preston glared at Austin like he’d just informed her that the color of her hair was best used for reflective hunting gear, not grey cover-up.
“I was just coming to see you, Mr. Camden.” She pursed her lips like saying his name left a bad taste in her mouth. Good.
“Well, looks like I beat you to it. I need to get J.J.’s stuff before we head out.”
“I’ve already packed the baby’s things and loaded them into Brantley’s truck. He didn’t mean to bring J.J. to you last evening. He was just … agitated. I’ll be taking the baby with me.”
Chuckling, Austin lifted his cell phone and played Brant’s message for his mother.
Her eyes goggled in fury. “And just what do you intend to do with that message?”