"What are you talking about?"
His eyes were glazed with need and even over her anger she was tempted to rock her hips and rub herself against his hardness as he held her so tight against him. She pulled her fury back around her as a defense, remembering how it felt to wake up in his bed, cash off to the side after the night they'd shared.
"I'm not your whore!"
"I know that. I never thought you were. I was coming to find you to tell you that..."
"I saw the money you left by the bed. Payment for services rendered?"
"No! That's not was that was at all. That was so you could get some clothes while I was gone on patrol."
"Well, that's not what it felt like."
"We had an agreement. You helped me lose Candace, I helped you find a husband, quickly. That was just me helping."
"You've already found me a husband and like I said, I left your coins in your tent."
"Then how did you get the clothes you're wearing?"
"Allen bought them."
"Wait a second, you're ok accepting money from the man you're literally letting buy you long term, but you have an issue accepting money innocently given by me, cause you thought I bought you for one night? What's the difference? Isn't that exactly what this marriage of yours will be? Payment for services? Seriously, what's the difference? Other than that with me that would make you a whore but with him that just makes you a wife?"
He was still holding her between him and the wagon, only now the passion between them had turned.
"That's totally different."
"How, exactly?"
"I... I gotta go. Put me down, I'm supposed to be meeting Allen."
"Wait. I'm sorry, this isn't how this was supposed to go. Remember when Mac told you that as shifters our animal scents our mate? I was coming to tell you that I scented you. I fought it, but I knew you were mine since before I kissed you to get rid of Candace. I know I'm not saying this right, and I know it's fast, but you were looking to marry fast already- you even asked if I was available. I'm not rich, but I would take care of you. You wouldn't want for anything..."
"So your wolf deciding my fate is normal, but me deciding my fate is selling myself as a whore? I said put me down!"
He released her and she slid down his length to land in the snow at his feet.
"Is everything all right here?"
It was Allen. He must have come looking back here for her when she wasn't already waiting for him to take her to dinner.
She started to make apologies, as she couldn't imagine a more embarrassing way to be found by her fiancé barely twenty-four house after she became one.
"No need to explain," he stopped her. "All three of us know our agreement is a formality. I don't expect you to... not meet between two wagons... when you want to. It's just that I couldn't quite tell if you wanted to be there or not."
"It's fine. We were just... I was leaving anyway, to join you."
Allen nodded, and offered her his arm.
Sandra was relieved when they started to walk away, but Allen turned back.
"Thank you," he said to Naythan as Naythan stood there, stiff and angry. "Thank you for introducing us. If you two are, well... how about we invite you to the wedding? I mean, this is awkward, but we all know the circumstances here. I'd have to make the marriage legal, consummating it at least once, but there's no reason why she shouldn't be able to have an enjoyable honeymoon, if you wanted to attend."
Sandra stood arm in arm with Allen, growing a brighter and brighter red by the second, as her fiancé was very politely offering Naythan a chance to make her honeymoon with Allen more enjoyable.
Damn, this is all kinds of fucked up.
Naythan seemed to take it in stride though, which only embarrassed her and pissed her off even further when he said, "If I ever attend her wedding, sir, it will be as the groom."
Allen seemed taken aback for a moment, narrowing his eyes at Naythan as the implied threat was boiling just below the surface. After a tense heartbeat or two, the clouds on Allen's face parted, and he laughed deeply, like he had just gotten the punchline of a joke that had almost sailed past him.
"That would be the day! The day you tie yourself down would be the day every skirt in five kingdoms mourns the loss of a rake. Good one! Would you care to join us for dinner?"
Naythan just shook his head no, saying, "Enjoy her while you eat. I know I did."
Sandra felt even more heat rise up from her neck to her hairline and for once she found that she was at a loss for words. As Allen turned and led her off to the food tents, Sandra couldn't help but lift the arm that wasn't entwined in the crook of Allen's elbow, and as the pair walked away, she flipped Naythan the bird.
"I saw that," Allen teased her as they headed to eat.
"Saw what?"
"There is only one reason a woman embraces a man one minute and flips him off the next. Only love makes you that crazy."
"You're the one who's crazy. I can't love him, I met him yesterday."
"You've known him longer than you've known me, and we're engaged."
She started to answer that, but couldn't, so she closed her mouth.
"If you've changed your mind and want to call this wedding off, I'd understand. No one even knows about us, not anyone who'd care anyway."
"No. Why would I call it off? I actually like you. This could totally work."
"It could work. It could work very well for the both of us. And I like you already as well, but to be honest?"
Sandra nodded, stepping closer to his side as they walked, using his body heat to help ward off the cold and the snow.
"I'd call this off in a heartbeat, if Colton would have me."
"Who is Colton? Oh, is he the one you left me last night to see?"
"To see? Sure, we can call it that. And damn, we saw each other good. Three times, a new record for us."
Sandra couldn't help but to giggle.
"You love him! I'm assuming, of course. Since our wedding wouldn't keep you from him, but you said 'if he'd have me.' So, he enjoys having you, it's the love part he has an issue with?"
"No, he loves me, too. But we can't marry. If either one of us actually controlled our family's estates, and we could afford to tell the world to fuck off, we would. I'm the weaker of the two of us, or the stronger, depending on how you see it. I'd be willing to walk away from everything for him. I don't need to be rich, I'd be happy living off the streets if he'd live there with me. Ok, maybe that's pushing it. I have grown up accustomed to a certain lifestyle, but that aside? Oh yeah, if he and I could live as two bachelors together somewhere during the day, a couple behind closed doors at night, working for a living to support ourselves, God forbid, I'd walk away from my family's fortune in a second."
"But he won't then?"
"No, he won't. He wants to say he could. I can see it in his eyes, but we both know he'd be miserable. So we play the game. We get together every chance we have, but if he said the word? I'd follow him anywhere, even into poverty."
"I'm sorry."
"What? Why? It's not your fault. Actually, you're helping a lot. With you and I married, we can continue on however we want, fortunes safe and sound. The history books will link your name and mine forever, and no one will ever know we seek others to fill our real needs. Which brings me back to you," he said as they sat down to eat at the same food tent they had the night before.
"What about me?"
"Naythan. I lightened the mood somewhat back there, purposely misunderstanding what he said about him being your groom if he attended your wedding. I didn't want to put you in a spot. But he was serious, wasn't he? And that crack about him enjoying having you for dinner? I take it you two... saw each other... a few times last night, as well?"
"Until I woke up alone, with payment beside the bed. That's what we were fighting about."
"That doesn't sound like Naythan. Well, making sure you have everything you need before he goes does, but what you're implying?
That's not like him at all. Hell, most of the women that hang around him would probably pay him instead, just for some relief from their own husbands. Or boredom."
"Like Candace?"
"Ah, you've met Candace? She may be the latest, but she isn't important to him. I get the feeling you are, though. His kind- they play hard, but when it hits them, they fall even harder."
"Now you sound just like him. 'Our animals decide our mates.' Like that's normal?"
"For shifters, it is. Did he actually say that? That his wolf scented you?"
"I think so. I mean, we were arguing over the whole whore thing, but yeah. At least I think that's what he was trying to say."
"Sandra, will you be honest with me about something?"
"Of course. I'm thinking our relationship is past any point of keeping secrets from each other."
"What exactly are you looking for? In a husband, I mean. Drilled down to the most honest and basic single sentence you can utter."
"One sentence?"
"The very core, yes."
"I guess it comes down to- I want to be taken care of. That's it. My mother as well. I don't want her to have to scramble, or go hungry. She and dad loved each other a lot, but with dad gone, we have nothing. I want to tell her that she doesn't have to ration her food, that she has a place to live forever. Ideally I wish she could stay where she is, where she loved dad, but as long as she doesn't go hungry, and can sleep warm, with a roof over her head, it doesn't matter if it's her roof or my husband's as long as it's sturdy."
"And you think marrying rich is the only way to get there?"
"Can you think of any others?"
"One more question. Putting money aside- me or Naythan?"
"What?"
"If you weren't blinded by your panicked but noble and good hearted need to take care of your mother, or if Naythan had the same wealth that I do, would you chose him or me? Be honest now, you won't hurt my feelings. I've already told you I'd chose Colton over you if all things were fair. Knowing nothing more than what you already know of my charming personality," he said with a wink. "And Naythan's... whatever you've come to know of Naythan so far, on gut instinct alone, our fortunes exactly the same."
Sandra thought about it, determined to answer him as honestly as she could.
"I don't really know him."
"Or me, for that matter, but here we are. Move your brain aside, listen to your inner peace. Imagine walking down the aisle, music playing, the whole bit. You reach the end, I'm waiting off to one side, Naythan's off to your other. Who do you turn to? Who do you reach for? Who tugs at your soul?"
"Naythan. Did you know that I asked him twice, within seconds of meeting him, if he was looking for a wife?"
Allen laughed, "And instead he brought you to me? You must have scared him shitless."
"I don't think Naythan scares that easy. He did lose some color though, now that you mention it."
"Oh you scared him, alright. He ran as panicked as you did. I can just imagine how it went, too. He's trying to lose one woman who'd gotten too attached, he literally runs into you, scenting his true mate in you, out of nowhere, in a wedding dress no less, asking him if he was looking for a wife. He panicked, feeding off your panic, and pushed you at me. Only then he spent some time with you, under the guise of his normal one night stand, and I'm sure his wolf is not helping matters to say the least."
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that as much as I'd like to marry you, and I will if it's truly what you want, I think you belong with Naythan, not me. From everything I've heard about shifters, when their animal choses a mate, and the claiming takes place, that union is very strong. Something almost magical happens with shifter-kind, and if the human feels the same, they usually live happily ever after, forgive the turn of phrase."
"I'm not sure. My heart- my gut, as you say, agrees with you, but my mind says it is silly to choose love. I should choose security instead."
"Security is an illusion. Nothing in life is guaranteed, but at least when you choose love you enjoy the ride a whole lot more. I guess you just need to decide what security means to you. Is it someone who will throw money at your problems? Which I'd gladly do for you, don't get me wrong. Or is it someone who may not be able to always buy you a fix, but who will always stand by your side and pitch in to work with you and help you fix it? Lots of people will be willing to ride with you in the ivory coach my family's money will provide, so to speak, but Naythan is the type who'd walk with you in the dirt when that coach breaks an axle. Actually, knowing him and his pack, they'd carry you the rest of the way."
As they started to eat it got quiet between them, as Sandra let everything he'd said roll around in her mind.
"I owe him an apology, don't I? Whatever I decide, at the very least I need to tell him that I misunderstood about the money."
"Mmmm, make up sex. I'm jealous."
She laughed, "I doubt that. Hell, I flipped him off when I left."
"Passion is sexy. And his animal side already wants you. Maybe he'll even have you again for dinner tonight. You know what they say about those big, bad wolves."
"No, I don't. What do they say?"
"That they'll huff, and they'll puff, and they'll blow your..."
He couldn't even finish the words, they were both laughing too hard.
"How much do you want to bet your apology ends in hot, sweaty make-up sex? Maybe I'll pick a fight with Colton tonight myself," he said with a grin as they finished their meal.
Chapter 8
Naythan looked up at Candace as she straddled his hips. More accurately, he squinted up at her, trying to decide if she was real or if she was a product of his drunken delusions. He finally decided that he must be dreaming her, because he knew that even as shit-faced as he was, there was no way in hell he'd invite her into his tent.
She sure feels real, he thought as she shifted her hips, grinding herself against his erection, which was thankfully separated from her with a few layers of blankets between his naked cock and her spread thighs.
She rocked against him again, reaching to pull off her top as she spoke.
"Oh good, you're awake. I thought I was going to have to slap you or something to get you to stop moaning her name when I slid down on top of you. I still don't know what you saw in her, but I'm assuming you've gotten her out of your system and we can get back to business. I've missed you in my bed."
"What the fuck, Candace? How did you even get in here?"
"It's a tent. I knocked first, but when your only answer was a snore, I let myself in. I figured there were better ways of waking you than knocking louder. I was hoping you hadn't had so much to drink that you wouldn't be able to get it up, but obviously that isn't the case. You've never failed to rise to the occasion before, I don't know why I even doubted you, to be honest."
"You have five seconds to get off of me and out of my tent before I kill you."
"Now is that any way to be? You're obviously grumpy and frustrated. Here, let me take care of that for you."
She started to slide down his legs, leaning over him as she backed up, obviously intending to take care of his frustrations with her mouth. Her breasts swung freely above his face as he growled up at her.
"Four seconds, Candace, or I swear you will leave this tent airborne and half naked."
"Damn it, Naythan! What does she have that I don't have? Whatever it is, I'll get some, too."
"Desperation does not become you. Three seconds."
Not daring to trust her to get up before he lost it and made good on his threats, he sat up under her, pushing her off of him.
She quickly tried to put her shirt back on as she was dumped on the floor of his tent.
He stood up, his blankets falling to his feet as he stood naked and at attention in the middle of his tent. He took the few steps needed to reach the door and he stepped outside and held the flap open for her, waiting just outside of his own tent, naked as the day he was born, as she adjuste
d herself and stood.
"Don't you ever let yourself into my tent again, or next time I'll make good on my promise. I do not belong to you, you are not my mate," he told her as she marched past him and into the snowy air outside, a far cry from the warmth inside the tent.
He started to step back inside and close the flap behind him, but she grabbed his arm, his words just now registering.
"I am not your mate? You don't belong to me? That doesn't sound like you at all, that sounds like the words of a mated shifter. Have you claimed her? I thought she was marrying Allen and you were free, as always."
"That is none of your business."
"Ah, that's a no. But you want to claim her, don't you? Which means that your wolf scented her. She's not here, so I'm guessing she told you no. No wonder you're shit-faced. That means a lifetime of pain for you, doesn't it? If the one your wolf chooses rejects you.
Everyone has heard about her already, a story like hers flies through a crowd like this. The rumor is that she showed up in a wedding dress, practically begging for someone to marry her. Anyone would do. And yet she rejects you for Allen. Obviously she cares a lot more about money than she'd ever care about you.
How does it feel to know that you're not good enough to marry? It's a bitter pill, isn't it? At least I could console myself knowing that it was your wolf who didn't want me, that I didn't have the right smell or something, but I made do knowing the man wanted me just fine. But even before she got here you were avoiding me.
The irony of it all is beautiful, isn't it? The one who swore he'd never commit, being rejected by a woman who arrived ready to marry anyone who'd take her."
"It is true that I always said I'd never settle down. I kept saying the words, but even I didn't know how right they were. I thought settling down meant just that- settling. I didn't ever want to settle. I didn't want to tie myself to one woman forever, to one woman's bed forever.
Everyone told me that I would change my mind when the right one came along, but I thought they were full of shit. I thought that was what they told themselves when they slid in beside the same woman night, after night, after night.
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