by Julie Solano
I AWAKEN TO THE AUDIBLE whisper of voices behind me. There has to be at least three of them pecking away at the back of my head. Don’t they know this is a chapel? A Godly place where people can come for refuge? Peace? I’m annoyed that they are being so disrespectful in my restful sanctuary. Why do they have to sit so close to me? This is the first time I’ve slept without those atrocities haunting my dreams. I needed this time. I needed this break from reality. Why can’t they just go away?
“Yeah, I guess she drowned, and they brought her back to life.”
My ears perk up when I hear the drowning reference. How many people nearly drown at this time of year?
I cock my head, trying to hear their whispers. I’m curious to see who they’re talking about. Living in such a small community, odds are I know who it is. Another drowning? Holy hell. Hasn’t there been enough trauma for one Thanksgiving break? Poor people.
“Who was she with?”
“I thought you already knew she was with her boyfriend.”
“Yeah, he was driving way too fast and totally flew off the cliff.”
“Really, did he make it?”
“I heard he had some minor injuries, nothing life threatening. What’s really bad, is he didn’t even help get her out of the water.”
“Are you serious? How could he just sit there and watch his girlfriend drown? I bet he was drinking. If he was, they’d better charge him with attempted murder or something. I can’t believe he didn’t even go in after her.”
The click of a tongue lights my nerves on fire, as the grating voice continues.
“He’ll probably get off because of his family name.”
“They always do. But he’s still going to have to live with himself.”
“I’m sure he was sloshed. Maybe they’ll finally get a clue and learn something from this. Drinking and driving. I mean, I party, but I’d never drive afterward.”
My boiling blood begins to awaken me from my grogginess. How can they talk about a tragedy like this? In a chapel of all places? Don’t they know God is listening? I’m not sure who they’re talking about, but I feel sorry for whoever it is. I know how it feels to suffer through this kind of trauma. My own girlfriend almost drowned after flying over a cliff and rolling into a river. I couldn’t help her, and it had nothing to do with drinking. I was knocked out on the ground nearly bleeding to death. They need to give this guy a break. Maybe he was facing the same kind of situation we were … dodging a truck, fleeing gunshots, and … wait a second. Cliff? Drowning? They can’t be talking about Peyton and me?
I shrink down into my wheelchair as the agony tears into my chest. The small town gossip has made it full circle, and I’m privy to hear what people are saying first hand. See Caden, you were right. You’re not the only one who thinks this is your fault. You did this to her. YOU did this to that beautiful angel. I claw my fingers up both sides of my face, gripping my hair in my hands. Curling myself into a ball, I stuff the growing ache inside and rock back and forth, trying not to cry out. The pain burns as it slices its way down my constricted throat and finds its way into the pit of my stomach. Silently, I begin to weep.
The nasty gossip continues behind me when I feel a hand come down on my shoulder. I look up to see Jenna. I’m sure she feels me shaking, as I work to stifle an audible cry. She bends down beside me and lifts my chin. “What’s the matter, Caden? Was this too much for you?” Rather than answering her question, I pull my index finger to my lips, trying to quiet her. Then I point discreetly behind me, trying to get her to listen to the conversation happening a few rows back.
“Was it just the two of them?”
“No, they were with those wine people too. I guess they were staying over there for Thanksgiving.”
“Did anyone else get hurt?”
“I heard they all made it out with hypothermia and a little frostbite. They were all released the next day. Poor Peyton took the brunt of it.”
“I knew she shouldn’t have started hanging out with those idiots. They’re reckless people. I mean, we all saw how they acted that night at the barn dance.”
“Yeah, ever since she started dating Caden, she doesn’t use her common sense anymore. Four wheeling, jumping off bridges, you name it. She’ll risk anything for him … I guess that includes her life.”
“She just wants to be popular. I bet you’re right about the partying.”
This is just about as much as I can take. I mess up one time. One time. At my own birthday party nonetheless. And now I have the reputation of the high school lush?
“Uh, maybe we shouldn’t be talking like this right now. I kinda feel guilty.”
“Yeah, do you even think she’ll make it?”
“I don’t know, but it doesn’t sound good.”
Jenna’s hand finds mine. She begins to grip tighter and tighter, looking at me with disgust. “Don’t listen to them! Don’t do it. Nothing they’re saying is true. They don’t know what they’re talking about. I’m going back there to set them straight.” She releases her death grip on my hand and slams her fist against her palm.
“Not here, Jenna. Not now.” I grab her pant leg, trying to keep her from leaving my side.
“So, it’s okay for them to talk like that? And I can’t put an end to it? Or, stick up for Peyton?”
“Peyton?”
“Yes, Peyton. Listen to the way they’re trashing her … saying she was partying? Saying she’s just dating you for popularity? Stay out of my way. I’m going back there to smash somebody.”
I can’t handle it anymore. I release Jenna’s pant leg and pray for the best. “Do what you need to do. I’m not going to stop you.” I look back over my shoulder to see who she’s up against.
“Oh, hell no!” It’s Chelsea, Amber, and that slouche, Tiara. I thought I recognized that clunky voice. “Yeah, I’d wish you luck, but something tells me you don’t need it. I’ve already watched you take Chelsea down once. Go get ‘em!”
Jenna pulls off her wig and smock and throws them down into my lap. “If I’m not back in twenty, send a search party. It may take me a few extra minutes to scalp all three of ‘em.”
She marches down the aisle, stopping a few rows back. My body tenses as her sarcastic greeting rings through the chapel. “Hi there, ladies. Would you like some true gossip?” Jenna has perfected her snarky tone. “I overheard you talking, and I want to tell you what really happened. You know I had a front row seat to the whole thing. You won’t want to miss this. I just don’t want to tell you here, in the chapel. We should go somewhere, not so … sacred, where we can speak openly and freely. You know, so I can fill you in on every last, gory detail, cuss words and all.”
“Really?” Tiara sounds surprised, yet excited.
“Oh yeaaaah … I want the whole town to know what really happened, and I can’t think of anyone better to spread the news. Come with me, girls,” Jenna purrs. “I know just the place.”
Go get ‘em, Jenna. I hear the creaking of benches and the shuffling of feet. If I know anything about my friend, it’s that she’s all about life lessons. And there’s no way I’m not watching them learn this one.
Trying to move myself away from the pew, I find out really fast that I’m not going anywhere in this wheelchair with a bum arm. I pull my feet off the metal footrests and work my way to a standing position. I feel like I finally have enough strength to walk, but I can’t take too long. I have no idea where Jenna is headed with those girls, and I don’t want to miss this show.
Dropping the nurse outfit in the wheelchair, I begin to make my way through the chapel. It’s too hard to push with one arm, so I decide to ditch it at the entrance. I’ll come back for it later. I’m sure one of those girls will need this more than I do when Jenna’s through with them. I shuffle my way out to the foyer and look down the long hall, only to catch the minute forms of Jenna and the girls rounding the corner. She must be taking them out to the little garden on the west side of the hospital. No one goes out there at
this time of year.
I need to stop and take a break. I’m woozy and lightheaded. Breathe. As much as I want to see her teach them a lesson, I know I need to get out there to keep an eye on things. Sometimes that girl doesn’t know her own strength. I back against the wall and scoot myself along until I reach the entrance of the intersecting hallway. The door to the courtyard is in sight.
Taking in a deep breath, I head toward the door. I’m fatigued from the long walk, and a little wobbly as I make my way across the wide hallway toward the exit. I hope I didn’t miss the show. I’m a little worried Jenna may take it too far, but I’d love to see the looks on their faces when they see how wrong they were about the cause of the accident. They have no idea what really happened down river. Knowing them, they’re going to be hanging on every word. They’ll make sure the whole town knows about the shootout and Pistol’s disappearance. Jenna’s brilliant. She’ll stop the drinking theory these girls are spreading all over town. She definitely knows how to set a backfire.
When I finally make it to the door, I peer through the glass to see if the girls are outside. My warm breath steams the cold window, blurring my view of the courtyard. I quickly rub out the fog with my hand and press my face harder against the glass, scanning left to right across the garden. Just seeing it again, reminds me of the time we spent out there during the fall when Kaitlyn was going through her shoulder surgery.
A sweet memory crosses my mind. It’s Peyton and me snuggling on the wooden bench tossing quarters into the wishing pond. I’ll never forget the look on her face when I told her I had a gift for her, and pulled out that old, brown roll of quarters tied up in a polka dotted bow. I’d been saving those treasures since I was eight. She’s the first girl I ever wanted to spend them on. It was money well spent, too. There are some unbelievable wishes lying at the bottom of that pond. She still tells me it’s the nicest gift a boy ever gave her.
I snap back to reality when the corner of my eye catches movement near the footbridge. Stealthily, I open the door and slide outside, losing my breath as an icy gale of wind blows through the courtyard. I have to wipe my tearing eyes so I can find my way to the path. Now that I’m out here, it feels so dreary. This place held a lot more life back in the fall. It hadn’t yet lost its vibrancy. Now, it’s almost unrecognizable. The spirit is all but gone. All that’s left is the twiggy remnants of the rose garden, and colorless leaves lining the cobblestone path to the small pond.
As I near the water, splashing and screaming draw my attention upward. I pick up my pace so I can get a better look at which girl it’s coming from. Caught off guard by the energy it takes to move in this condition, I double over to take a breath. Lord knows I don’t want to pass out. Last time I fainted, disaster struck.
Seconds later, I look up to see it all unfold in slow motion. Jenna is standing in the middle of the bridge. She has a long blonde ponytail in one hand, while pinching a pointy chin with the other. I can actually see the white outline of her hand pressing into Tiara’s cheeks.
“You think you’re not going in there too?” Jenna spits in her face. “I’ll show you exactly how it feels to drown in December! Let’s hear you talk about other people’s tragedies now, you gossiping slouche!”
There’s a little wrestling around as I watch Tiara try to gain footing on the icy bridge. There’s no way she’s going to win this battle with Jenna. Just seconds later, one strong and final push, sends Tiara tumbling into the water. She lands right between Chelsea and Amber, who continue to bob and scream, clenching their chests as their teeth rattle wildly from their shivering.
“Jenna, let’s get out of here, now!” I cry out, knowing that the commotion is likely to catch someone’s attention.
“One second, Caden! I’m just starting to have fun here!”
“I think we’ve already pressed our luck enough for one day. NOW, Jenna!”
Of course she’s going to ignore me. I watch her lean back over the bridge and laugh out, “And if you think you’re going to rat me out for this one, you’re gonna find out what I’m really capable of! From now on, you’d better keep your ignorant theories to yourselves. Before you go running your mouths about my friends and what happened down at that river, have your facts straight!”
She runs off the bridge brushing the filth of the gossip girls off her hands. Then stopping at my side she gloats, “Done and done! Let’s go, Caden. I’ll fill you in on everything back in the room.”
It is certainly a sight to behold. The three sopping wet girls bobbing their way out of the green, slimy pond, while Jenna stands proudly untouched. “Jenna, would you mind stopping by the chapel first? I’m not sure I have enough strength to get back to the room on my own, and I have a feeling you’re going to need that disguise after the stunt you just pulled.” I wrap my good arm around her neck as she helps me walk back into the building.
Back at the chapel, Jenna pulls on the black wig and nurse’s smock. Once I settle into the chair, she pushes me down the hall, nonchalantly. She starts in with a little tune she whistles when she’s up to no good. Thinking of her in the black, bobbing wig I have to laugh. I look up at her with a nervous chuckle, “You know how we’re gonna have to play this off, right?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about keeping us out of trouble, Jenna. When we get back to my room, we need to settle in and act like we’ve been playing poker all night. And, make sure you’re wearing that costume.”
“Why is that? What are you thinking?”
“Tonight we’re turning the tables on them. I’m pretty sure we need to call the front desk and make a report of three girls playing out in the wishing pond. Just imagine the looks on their faces when they try to pin the whole thing on you, and conveniently, Jenna Bailey wasn't even at the hospital tonight. If anyone comes to check out the story, the only thing they’ll find is a black-haired nurse with a horrible southern accent.” I have to laugh as the vision unfolds in my mind. “I can just picture the looks on their faces as security drags them through the hallways in their sopping wet leggings and sequined ugly Christmas sweaters.”
Back up at the room, we sit down at the poker game. Now that I’m no longer sidetracked by the gossip girls, I’m growing fidgety and anxious, waiting for Jenna’s report on Peyton. I know she has to be alive, or the skirmish down at the wishing pond would’ve never happened. But, she hasn’t said a word, so it makes me nervous to ask. Maybe it’s so bad that she doesn’t want to say anything. Is she hiding something from me? I pick up my cards and hold them up to my face, peeking over the top. I scan her face for signs of deception. I press the cards against my lips, trying to give Jenna a chance to spill her guts, but I can’t keep my mouth shut for one more second. Oh, grow a pair. “Well?”
“Well, what?”
“Are you going to tell me what you found out about Peyton? You’re killing me here.”
“She’s alive. That’s all I know. They moved her back into ICU. I tried to follow them down the hallway, but all I could hear was that they need to watch her fluctuating heart rate. I guess there aren’t enough doctors and nurses here right now to have her in a regular room. There’s no way we’re getting back in there. I’m afraid we’re at the Carter’s mercy for updates.”
“Great, they’re the ones who won’t let us see her. This sucks.” I hang my head in defeat.
“It’s gonna be okay. If your blood work checks out, you’ll be out of here tomorrow morning, and we’ll figure out another plan. She’s going to be alright. It’s better for her in there anyway. They can watch her more closely.”
I can’t stand the thought of being any farther away from Peyton than I am right now. My frustration builds until finally, my anger comes to a head. I’m furious that this happened to her. What’s worse is that it’s my fault. And, I can’t even express my outrage that they’re keeping her from me. I throw my good arm into the cards, blasting our poker game into the air.
Jenna surveys the mess of car
ds, scattered all over the ground. “You know what? Forget about poker. Let’s just watch TV and relax. It’s been a stressful day.”
I feel bad about the mess. I work to mask my anger by helping Jenna pick up the cards. While I’m down on the ground, there’s a soft knock at the door. “Hide, Jenna. In the bathroom. Quick.” Jenna scampers off to the bathroom, leaving me on the floor alone.
“Are you okay, son?” It’s my dad’s voice. “You didn’t fall, did you?”
I look up to see he’s standing next to my doctor. “No. No. I just knocked some cards off the table while I was feeling around for the remote. I didn’t want to give the nurses any more work tonight. They seem kind of shorthanded.”
“That’s what we want to talk to you about. Doctor Smith here, seems to think it’s okay for you to go home a little early. He’s checked over your blood work, and he thinks it’ll be safe to release you tonight. They just don’t have the staff for extra patients, so it looks like we need to get your stuff together.”
Whoa. The news surprises me. It’s a bittersweet moment. I am so ready to get out of here and back to my own bed, but it’s hard thinking about being so far away from Peyton. The thought of her being stuck here indefinitely is especially hard.
Dr. Smith walks toward the bed, “I just need one last check on your vitals, and then we’ll have you out of here.”
My pulse quickens, and blood rushes to my head when I stand up. Stumbling back toward the bed, I work to disguise my falter as a fancy skip. I can’t let this guy know that I feel way worse than I look. “Just practicing my stellar footwork, Doc.” I snap my fingers and throw up my finger guns. “My teammates don’t call me Twinkle Toes for nothing.”
“Well, if you can move like that, I’d say you’re ready to get out of here. No need for this, I suppose.” He dangles his stethoscope out in front of him and tosses it up and over his shoulder. “I’ll just need your dad to come with me to take care of some final paperwork.”