by M. J. Scott
I tried to keep the note of hope out of my voice. Bryony didn’t say anything. “We could stand together, Bryony.”
“I—”
Frustration boiled in me. “You what? What’s so hard about this? You love me. Tell me you don’t.”
Silence.
Infuriating woman. “You can’t deny it. Because it’s true. So I don’t understand why you won’t just be with me. Don’t you want that? It doesn’t have to be how it was under the queen’s rule. We don’t have to be hidden and frozen and so bound up in the Veiled World. I can make changes. I have to make changes or we’ll all just end up right back where we were. Can’t you trust me that it will be all right? Haven’t you missed me?” I reached for her then, took her hand. Felt the pulse of her power as it met mine. And the roar in my pulse that told me that she was mine. “Don’t you feel that too?”
“I—”
I bit down, gave her space to speak. Held back the thousand arguments tumbling through my head. All the talking in the world couldn’t change her mind if she didn’t love me.
“I don’t know,” she said. “I’m a healer, Ash. I work with the humans. I have to be in the City. You have to be in Summerdale.”
“Not every second of every day.”
“You don’t know that. You don’t even know what will happen tomorrow.”
“I’m not Fen, no. But not knowing the future doesn’t mean that you have to be scared to hope, does it? To try? Do you want to be apart again? Because I don’t.”
“I can’t answer you,” she said. “I need time to think. And there are more important things to worry about.”
“More urgent things,” I said. “Things I have to worry about, things I have to prioritize, but they don’t have to be more important to me than you. Not if you don’t want them to. I can be a good king and a good man. If you’ll trust me.”
She turned for the door. “I can’t answer now, Ash. I’m asking you for time. Please.”
“We may not have that much time,” I said.
“Then that will be my regret to live with,” she said. “But I need it.”
Chapter Twenty-four
BRYONY
The hours until sunset crawled by no matter how much work I tried to hide behind. Every glance out the window to judge the angle of the light, every chime of the cathedral bells marking the passing hours mocked me.
I’d spent the few hours’ sleep I’d snatched alone, but Ash walked my dreams. Looking haunted as he had looked yesterday. Asking me to come with him and then melting away before I could give him an answer. Bearing the weight of the choice we’d forced on him.
Alone.
I hated thinking of him that way. He’d always been one to surround himself with friends and crowds of people when we were younger. I’d watched the Veiled Queen and she hadn’t had many friends. Definitely no husband to stand at her side. Which was her choice, but I understood why she’d made it. How could she tell who truly loved her and who just wanted the queen’s favor? She didn’t need an heir, because that wasn’t how our court worked. Maybe she’d wanted a child, but she’d given that up to rule us. And now it was Ash giving up everything he’d wanted.
Including me.
I’d forced that choice on him too. So what did that make me? Foolish? Wise?
Regretful, and living with an ache that felt as though someone had severed a vital part of my body.
I’d risen too early and sought out Simon, who was also trying to keep himself busy. Lily had left for the warrens before dusk the previous night and she had yet to reappear.
Simon was near frantic with worry, though he hid it reasonably well. But I knew him. Knew how he thought. Knew her absence was eating away at him.
Eventually I sent a note to Fen asking him to meet us in the hidden ward.
When he appeared, I pointed him toward Simon. “Can you tell him if Lily is still alive?”
Fen closed his eyes a minute. “I still see her,” he said. He looked down at Simon’s hand. “And I still see that band around your finger.”
Simon’s shoulders sagged and he closed his eyes for a moment. “Thank you,” he said. “But I’ll feel better about all of this when she’s safely back here.”
“We all will,” I said sympathetically.
“I’ll feel better when someone cuts Grey’s head off,” Fen said with feeling.
I shot him a look.
“Oh, don’t pretend that I’m the only one hoping that Ignatius doesn’t show tonight,” he said. “We’ll all be better off once he’s six feet under. Let Asharic forge his peace with Lady Adeline and then it might last.”
“Have you seen anything about tonight?” I asked curiously. Sunset was only a few hours away now. Surely that was near enough for Fen to be able to see clearly.
Fen tugged at the gem dangling from his ear. “No. It’s still too crowded, too many possibilities, I guess. Or some of the key players haven’t made up their minds.”
“Wonderful,” I muttered. “I really hate this.”
“We know,” Simon said.
“You might feel better if you were with Asharic,” Fen said with a grin. “Why aren’t you with him, by the way? Both of you are horribly bad-tempered when you’re apart.”
“None of your business,” I said. Then I paused. “Have you seen something about Ash? Do I need to be with him?”
“The Lady smiles on love. Isn’t that what they say?” Fen said cryptically.
“They also say she smiles on drunkards and gamblers,” I said acerbically.
“Well, Ash is gambling with this play,” Fen said. “Though, to be fair, whichever way he stepped, he’d be gambling at this point. So maybe the Lady will smile on him for that too.” He shuddered suddenly and grimaced. “I wouldn’t want to be in his place. In fact, in his place, I would’ve jumped on the nearest horse and fled the City as soon as they asked me to be king.”
Simon snorted. “You didn’t run when you had the chance, Fen.”
“Your sister is very convincing,” Fen said. “Besides which, no one was asking me to rule the Fae. That’s a thankless task if ever there was one. And a lonely one.”
I ducked away from his pointed look. Message received. Fen was on Asharic’s side. Which made me wonder again why I couldn’t be.
• • •
Ash had chosen to wait for Ignatius outside the ruins of the Treaty Hall. The wreckage of it hadn’t been touched, no one having had either any time to spare or the will to start rebuilding. It was symbolism, I supposed. A sign that he intended things to return to how they had been.
I only hoped it wouldn’t become a symbol of something else. Another Fae defeat.
Ash stood before the steps leading to the gaping hole where the doors to the hall should have been. The Fae were arrayed to the west of the square, taking up their traditional position.
The humans took the south with the Templars forming ranks between the spaces the Beast Kind would take and the rest of the humans. It was a clear message that no one would be allowed to incite violence here. The Fae had already combed every inch of the square, searching for enchantments, the mages assisting them. There were to be no surprises this time. Not if Asharic had anything to do with it.
His face was set, grim even. Someone had found armor for him that was far more elaborate than the leather and simple mail he usually wore.
It was silver and gold chased with the colors of his house so that he looked almost as if he wore flames.
I wondered how it had been made so quickly but then remembered it would have been Fae smiths, not metalmages, who would have wrought it. The biggest question was who had convinced him to wear it. I suspected his father.
His head was bare, though, the edges of his dark hair lifting slightly in the breeze while he waited. He wore no crown. The Veiled Queen had worn veils, not a crown. I didn’t know whether Ash was making a statement or whether he simply didn’t feel that he should wear one until he had actually been crowned.
&nb
sp; Either away he didn’t need it. No one would mistake who was in charge at that moment. The sense of his power filled the square like smoke. Even the humans with no magic seemed to feel it. They might not know what they were feeling, but they showed their respect.
But to me, he wasn’t the mysterious Fae king. He was the man who I once thought would be mine. The one I could no longer have. Not unless I wanted to turn myself into a living symbol as he was.
I took my place beside Holly and Fen. I should have joined the Fae, but right now I didn’t feel part of them. So I stood with my friends. Friends who, like me, didn’t truly belong to one world or the other. Friends who had chosen a side out of love and loyalty, not obligation.
And even with friends as close as these, I felt the lack of Ash by my side like a burn.
I bore it as we waited for the sun to lower those last few inches. For darkness to fall.
To see what the night would bring.
There was tension in the air. Tension and outright fear as the skies darkened.
The humans had become used to locking themselves away for the night over the last few months. Now they were standing here waiting for the enemy to appear.
Except they didn’t.
Not one.
“Well, that’s clear enough,” said a voice at my ear, and I turned to see Lily. Holly and Fen turned too and Holly flung herself forward to embrace her.
Lily looked tired and dirty but no worse for wear.
“Did you get them out?” I asked softly.
“Not out. But hidden. They’re safe for now, I hope.” She pulled a sheaf of papers from inside the leather vest she wore. “And I have more maps for Asharic.” She cocked her head at me suddenly. “Why aren’t you with him?”
“Long story,” I murmured.
“She’s being an idiot,” Holly said at the same time. She narrowed her eyes at me. “And don’t bother trying to glare me into submission, Bryony sa’Eleniel. That man loves you. Any fool can see that. And he needs you.”
“Would you give up your life for a man?” I asked.
Lily snorted. “She already did. So did I, for that matter. And it wasn’t giving something up—it was choosing something different. Something better. Holly’s right. Don’t be an idiot.” She nodded toward Ash. “You should go to him.”
But it was too late. Because Ash stepped forward and gestured for silence when the crowd started to mutter and chatter as he did so.
“The Blood and the Beast Kind have forfeited their rights under the treaty,” he said. “But hear this. I will reforge a peace.”
His voice echoed strangely and I wondered just how far it was carrying. All the way into the Night World, most likely.
“And I will accept anyone who wants to lay down arms and come to the negotiation table, but until then we are at war,” Ash finished.
There was cheering at that. Cheering that made me think I would never truly understand people. There was nothing worth celebrating in the act of war. But maybe it was just a conclusion, one way or the other, that they wanted. I couldn’t blame them for that. It was what I wanted too.
ASH
“You’re going tonight, then.”
I looked up from the maps I was studying for what felt like the thousandth time whilst we debated where best to deploy our forces. Bryony stood at the door of my office. No one else seemed to have heard her.
There were at least twenty men in the room and none of them had the good sense to notice a beautiful woman.
Soldiers.
Idiots. I should know. I was one.
My father arched a dark eyebrow at me before he turned his attention back to the maps, making me revise my opinion. My father had heard her. And he was wondering what I was going to do about it.
“Gentleman, I’d like to speak to Lady sa’Eleniel alone,” I said. I didn’t need to raise my voice. Some of them looked surprised, but all of them hurried out of the room, my father stopping to nod to Bryony and then turn and wink at me.
I didn’t know what he had to be so amused about.
Bryony was clutching a sheaf of papers in her hands, a dark blue cloak covering whatever she was wearing.
“Come in,” I said.
“I don’t want to keep you,” she said, but she walked forward to join me by the desk.
“You’re not,” I said. “We’re nearly done here.” I hoped I was telling the truth. I was used to commanding two thousand men. Now, with the Fae swelling my forces, I could call many times that if I needed to. It made everything more complicated. My mercenaries were still recovering from the news that their commander was now the Fae King. I needed not to rattle them further by getting my first command decisions wrong.
I only wished someone could make me feel better about it all. But the king, it seemed, stood alone. Not even the woman before me was willing to change that. But I still couldn’t turn her away. Wasn’t going to deny myself a few minutes of the sight and scent and sound of her. I waited, wondering what she had come to say.
“Are you going tonight?”
“Either we take the fight to him or he brings it to us. I, for one, am sick of waiting.” I wanted it over and done with, one way or another.
Her lips pressed together as she looked at the uppermost map, one of the ones that Lily had drawn of the warrens. “Isn’t it risky to go into the Night World?”
“Yes. But I’m hoping that there will be less damage to the humans that way. I’m leaving a force protecting the border in case Ignatius tries to mount some sort of sneak attack, but I want to keep the fighting out of the human boroughs as far as possible.”
“It’s a long way from the hospitals.” She bit her lip, one hand straying to her chain. It shimmered the same color as her cloak for a moment.
“There are enough of us with some healing skills to make do.” I didn’t say that fighting against desperate Beast and Blood there were likely to be more corpses than injuries. She understood that.
“I could—”
I cut off her words with a sharp gesture. I would fight because I had to. But there was no way in seven hells I would let her go anywhere near the Night World. “No. You couldn’t. You’re staying here, where I know you’re safe. Where you can do what you’re best at. There will be patients enough, I imagine.”
“I can’t just wait around,” she said.
“And I can’t do what I have to do if I’m worrying about you every second.”
“Yet you want me to sit here and worry about you.”
My heart sped up. “Will you be worried about me?” I asked.
Her eyes were endlessly deep. But this time she didn’t evade me. “Yes.”
I smiled as hope flared. “Well, then, that makes it easier.”
“Makes what easier?” She sounded confused. And starting to be irritated. Which was good. I preferred her on her feet and fighting to pale and scared.
“It’s always easier to fight when you have something to fight for,” I said. I tugged the Family ring off my hand. Laid it in my palm. “I’m not really supposed to wear this anymore.” The king was supposed to have no allegiance to a Family. All the Fae were his responsibility. I needed rings of all colors now. I studied the ring for a moment. I’d only had it back on my finger for a short time and everything had changed again. Still, there was somewhere else I wanted it to be. I held out my hand to Bryony. “Will you take it? Keep it safe?”
Bryony froze. An offer of a Family ring was an offer of marriage. I didn’t know if I was mad to ask again, but she’d come here to see me. So I had to try one last time. If only to know what I really was fighting for—the Fae and the City or something far more precious. A future with Bryony standing beside me. “Bryony?” I prompted. “Will you take it?”
She sucked in a breath. And took the ring from my hand. Closed her fingers around it. Then she moved closer and kissed me. One fierce, brilliant kiss. Enough to carry me through the darkness and bring me safely home again. Or so I hoped.
“Com
e back safely,” she said. Then she shoved the sheaf of papers at me. “Lily made you more maps. She said she marked where she hid the Fae women on these.” Her words were coming too fast, as though she wasn’t entirely in control of her voice.
“Bryony, we need to—”
“Later. After.” She took another gulping breath. “When you come back to me.” She pulled the hand holding the ring close to her chest. “We’ll talk then.” She was gone from the room before I could come up with a protest, leaving me with the taste of her on my mouth, a bare hand, and a fistful of maps.
• • •
Another hour or so passed before we were ready. I stood beside Guy and listened as he relayed the orders we’d decided on to my—our—assembled army. An army the likes of which probably hadn’t been seen since the Veiled Queen took on the Blood all those centuries ago and bent them to her will. I hoped I could pull off the feat a second time.
I let Guy’s words wash over me, let my thoughts drift slightly as he spoke of the plans and the orders to spare anyone who surrendered. To try to spare as many as possible of the Trusted and Nightseekers that we encountered.
To show mercy.
I hoped we could, though I knew that some would lose their heads in the heat of battle and that there would be deaths aplenty on both sides before I was done. I would have to bear the weight of those deaths. I had done it before. Perhaps not on this scale but I would find a way. But first, I wanted a last breath of peace, so I thought of Bryony. Of the midnight colors of her and the brightness and fire that she tried to hide beneath the cool front she presented to the world. The fire she showed to me.
I wanted to feel that fire again. And for that reason, and no other, I would fight my way clear tonight and I would bring Ignatius Grey to his knees and bring peace back to this gods-damned Half-Light City. Cause it to change its name and come out of the darkness that threatened to engulf it.
Or I would die trying.
Bryony.
I thought her name one last time and then I led the way into the Night World.