by Monica Carly
Now it was Claudia’s turn to be shocked. ‘You mean …’
‘Yes! I didn’t know it, but I was taken to Italy to get accustomed to the baby. I was used, by Stefano and his family, disgracefully, and I was too innocent to see through it. Then, on the day we set off to return to England, Carlo was put in the car without my knowing. You should have heard the wailing, the mother, Rosa, made that day! She must have felt like you – only she had had him a bit longer, and she had to go through the slow torture of seeing me there each day, knowing I was going to replace her as his mother, and he would be taken away. I was the only person there who didn’t know it.’
Now it was Claudia’s turn to look shocked. ‘However did you feel – when you discovered you were being thrust into looking after a baby?’
‘How do you think? I was absolutely furious, but it didn’t get me anywhere. If I was cross, Stefano became unpleasant. In the end I found it best to knuckle down and get on with it.’
‘Oh Maria … the whole thing’s more unbelievable than one of those fanciful stories you used to make up when you were young. Only this time it’s all true – and you and I seem to have been pawns in some mischievous game! I had to give up a child I wanted more than anything else in the world, and you had to take one on completely against your will! Were you able to love him, after a while? Did you come to think of him as yours?’
‘Yes, I did, after a surprisingly short time, really. Carlo was a lovely little boy. And when I finally had a son of my own, Carlo was thrilled with his small brother, and that endeared him all the more to me, especially as Stefano was so disappointed with Timothy.’
‘Disappointed? Why? Did he want a girl?’
‘No, not at all. He was thrilled to have a second son. But physical prowess mattered terribly to him, and Timothy, as you will have seen for yourself, was born with a physical handicap.’
Claudia nodded. ‘I did see there was a problem with his foot.’
‘Stefano couldn’t bear to think that any son of his was less than perfect physically. Masculine strength meant such a lot to him. He started taunting Tim, and humiliating him. At the same time he was always praising Carlo. Tim felt this difference in their treatment keenly, and it made me so sad. But amazingly the two boys had a good relationship. Carlo was protective and would often put paid to any school bullies who were having a go at Tim.’
‘And all this time I’ve been envying you with your cosy family! If only I’d known … but then, I didn’t give you a chance to tell me. I can’t tell you how ashamed I feel.’
‘We’re not going to have any self reproaches. That’s a rule in this house. Sometimes I get a bit weepy, at the thought of all the problems I’m heaping on my two young people – but they won’t let me be apologetic. They tease me and laugh me out of it. I’m so lucky, I know.’
‘Oh, Maria, you’ve turned into such a brave person.’
‘We’ve both changed a lot, haven’t we? I suppose that happens when life deals you some hard blows – and to think neither of us knew all the important things that have happened to the other. I’d like to tell you the rest of my story, as briefly as I can, if you can bear it.’
‘Go on,’ said Claudia gently, ‘if you’re sure you have the strength. I don’t want you to get tired.’
‘I am tired, but now I’ve started I don’t want to stop. Carlo joined the army, just when the trouble in the Falklands Islands blew up. He went out there with the task force, and was killed at the battle for Mount Longden.’
Claudia, shocked, squeezed her sister’s hand, her eyes moistening.
Maria paused a bit, and then went on. ‘Stefano was heartbroken. He started to get very drunk, and this led to violence. When Timothy saw it he wanted to protect me. He couldn’t bear seeing Stefano hit me, so one day, being quite big and strong for his age, he lashed out, and knocked his father to the floor. Stefano left the next day and I have never seen him or heard from him since.’
Now Claudia was sobbing again. ‘I can’t bear it! You went through all that – and I was no help to you at all! Too busy feeling sorry for myself! What a thoroughly useless older sister I have been.’ She covered her face with her hands.
‘Remember the rules! There’s not to be any guilty feelings. Let’s just be glad we’re together now. I’m longing for Timothy to come home and see you. You gave him such short shrift when he visited you!’
‘I know. Again, I regret it. I’ve been so harsh towards everyone … just horrible.’
Maria was silent for a moment, thinking. Finally, she said, ‘What I need to know is this. I’ve been trying to find the answer amidst all we’ve found out about each other and I can’t. Why did you change your mind about seeing me? Timothy came home from his visit to you miserably disappointed. He was certain he had failed in his quest, so we were both amazed when you telephoned to say you were coming. And you haven’t answered my earlier question – did you ever find out what happened to your daughter?’
Chapter 46
‘Did she come?’
Timothy stood in the doorway anxiously – but one look at his mother’s face and he had his answer. Maria was smiling, and there was a special look of contentment in her eyes.
‘She came, and it was wonderful. It was emotional, nerve-racking, chilling, surprising, almost unbelievable, and completely wonderful.’
‘You’re friends again?’
‘We are, and so happy to be friends. There’s so much I have to tell you.’
Nicola was behind him.
‘I’m going to get supper ready – you tell Timothy all about it.’
‘What a kind, tactful girl you have found yourself!’
‘I know. I’m the luckiest chap. Look, Mum, if you’re sure you’re not too tired, do tell me what happened. I’m longing to hear about it.’
‘I don’t know where to start. Perhaps I’ll try and tell it in order, although it certainly didn’t come out that way. We kept getting side-tracked, or we’d have to stop to blow noses. I think you’ll have to buy me another box of tissues.’
Maria recounted, as best she could, what Claudia had told her. She described the night of the ball, and it was necessary not to spare the details, because of the result of that night’s liaison.
‘Just think – Claudia went off to have a baby, all by herself – and none of us knew. She never told our father, or anyone. She made all the arrangements herself to have the child adopted, because she knew she couldn’t pursue a teaching career with an illegitimate child – and she couldn’t possibly have looked after it herself. So she had to give the child away – she said it was a lovely baby girl. She was absolutely heartbroken.’
‘Did she ever see her again?’
‘Hold on … I’ll tell you … but I need to try and keep things in order.’
Maria went on to say how Claudia had believed Stefano wanted to marry her, and had been devastated when she came home and found he had married the younger sister instead. Then, to make things a hundred times worse, there had come the blow of discovering that she was pregnant.
‘I’d no idea!’ cried Maria. ‘It never, for a single moment, occurred to me that Claudia would want to marry him.’
‘Did the bounder actually propose to her?’
‘Claudia is certain that he did. From what she says it sounds as if he was trying to find out if she would be suitable to look after Carlo. He must have decided that she wasn’t, because she said something to him about being keen to get going with her teaching. As she would, naturally, after having studied so hard. But stupid Maria, with no thought of any sort of career, might well have seemed a more suitable candidate.’
She went on to tell Timothy how it had then been her turn to describe her life. As her story had unfolded she had seen Claudia’s reaction at the realisation that her sister’s lot had not been the cosy, family life she had imagined. And knowing nothing about Carlo, she couldn’t possibly have guessed that Stefano had a particular
motive for marrying Maria.
‘When I told her about Rosa she immediately grasped what slow torture it must have been for that poor girl to have to watch me, day by day, being trained to take over her role as mother.’
Timothy shook his head, dumfounded by what he was hearing. ‘What incredible stuff you and your sister have both been through – and yet neither of you knew about the other.’
‘And all the while we both completely misunderstood each other. I was totally bewildered as to why she wouldn’t see me, and why she bore me such a deep grudge. But looking at it through Claudia’s eyes, it must have been blindingly obvious what the problem was, and she couldn’t understand why I couldn’t see it! There was I, with the twin blessings of marriage and a baby – at her expense! But of course, I didn’t know that was what she was thinking, and she couldn’t possibly have any idea of what actually happened to me.’
‘She believed you’d deliberately hatched a plot to steal Stefano away from her! Oh dear – what a fearfully long time you two have been apart – and all because of mutual misunderstandings! How sad that it’s taken your illness to clear things up.’
Maria, who was now getting very tired, was quiet for a little while. Then she went on, ‘There were many things we neither of us knew about the other. She had no idea that we lost Carlo to the Falklands War, or that Stefano had become violent, and then left us. And I, of course, knew nothing about her daughter, or the pain she experienced, nor that she had vowed never to let anyone get close to her again.’
‘And the baby girl? Did she ever find out what happened to her?’
‘That’s the marvellous part of the story. Just recently Francesca – or Fran, as she likes to be called – came walking back into Claudia’s life! It seems she had long wanted to trace her birth mother, but held off doing so until her adoptive mother had died, as she knew it would upset her terribly. Then, just a few weeks ago, she appeared on the doorstep. Claudia was dreadfully shaken, and at first didn’t want to have anything to do with her. But Fran persisted and gradually, it seems, they have drawn closer.’
‘That’s an amazing story!’ Timothy smiled at his mother. ‘But what I want to know is – why did Claudia change her mind about seeing you? She was pretty adamant in her refusal when I visited her. In fact she was downright rude to me. I couldn’t have been more surprised when she rang to ask if she could come.’
‘There’s one more piece in the jigsaw which explains it all – and it’s perhaps the most amazing part of the whole story. Tim, do you remember, the time when you were thirteen? Stefano had just left, and I was in a pretty poor condition. You thoughtfully suggested we had a few days away, to help things settle down. I drove the old boneshaker all the way to Cornwall, and we had a happy time together exploring those lovely coves?’
‘I do remember – particularly one beach, because three noisy females invaded our space. And as if that wasn’t enough, one stupid jackass of a girl went in swimming, and got swept out to sea – and I had to go in and fish her out!’
‘And I tried to stop you! But it’s just as well you’re as pig-headed as you are, because the stupid jackass of a girl you saved on that occasion was none other than Claudia’s daughter! In other words – your cousin! Can you believe that?’
‘That was Fran?’
‘It was indeed. Apparently she never forgot the boy who saved her life that day – the boy who wore shoes with one heel higher than the other.’
‘Well I never! That is some coincidence! My goodness, that takes some believing! You mean to say you and I were on that beach at the same time as Claudia’s daughter? Even so, I don’t see how that comes into it.’
‘It was when you were leaving Claudia’s flat, and you walked out ahead of her – and Claudia noticed the way you walked. And then, it seems, she remembered the story Fran had told her, of how she had been saved from drowning, and how she watched the boy who’d saved her walk away – and she had noticed his shoes with one heel higher than the other. That all came back to her in that moment!’
Timothy shook his head in amazement.
‘It completely changed her attitude to you. You see, Fran has become very dear to her now, I’m very glad to say, and since she owed Fran’s life to you … well …’
Timothy took his mother’s hand, still trying to take it all in.
‘So you see, my dear, your courage on that day … well, it not only saved someone’s life, but was eventually the cause of healing the rift between me and my sister. And to think I tried to stop you going into the water after that girl!’
‘I always was an obstinate so-and-so. But thanks for telling me all this. It’s certainly a lot to take in. Now I think you should have a little sleep. You must be worn out.’
Maria nodded.
‘Yes, I have to admit it – I am very tired – but oh, Timothy, I’m so very happy!’
Chapter 47
Claudia left Maria’s house with a lighter step than she had had for years. Like Christian, in Pilgrim’s Progress, a burden had rolled off her shoulders. Saddened as she was at the sight of her sister suffering from a devastating illness, her overriding emotion was a feeling of absolution. Maria had forgiven her for her stubborn refusal to allow any communication for forty years and the barrier of the intervening years had disappeared, allowing a harmony between them that was reminiscent of the old days. Laughing and crying together as they exchanged accounts of all that had happened, they could have been in their teens once more.
Claudia decided to take a longer walk home so that she could continue to delight in this feeling. She wanted to hang on to it as long as possible. Without thinking much about the route she was taking she realised she was near Kingdown Primary School – a place she had deliberately tried to avoid until today. The park opposite was a pleasant spot to sit and when the weather was reasonable mothers often gathered there to wait for their children to be let out of school. A woman was sitting on a bench, holding the handle of a pushchair, cooing over the occupant. Claudia could hear the baby chuckling, and as she drew near she thought she recognised the woman.
‘It’s Paula, isn’t it? Paula Munro?’
The woman looked up, unsure for a moment; then recognition dawned.
‘Claudia! How very nice to see you again! How are you? Were you badly hurt, after that fall? What terrible weather it was, that day!’
‘Oh no, it was nothing – just a graze. You were so kind to me. I should have rung you up and thanked you properly.’
‘Don’t worry about it. It was the least I could do – all I did was run you home. I couldn’t believe, afterwards, I’d asked you to tea! I must have embarrassed you! Jack always said it would be a good thing if I could learn to think before I spoke, but I never seem to do it.’
‘So this is your new baby?’ Claudia, looking at the child, saw a pretty face with a mop of curly brown hair. ‘This must be Maria?’
‘That’s right. It’s clever of you to remember the name.’
Paula tickled her daughter’s tummy, making her smile.
‘She’s very pretty. And how’s the older one – I think you said she’s called Isabel? I take it she’s at the school?’
‘Yes, we did get her into Kingdown, and she’s loving it. She always comes running out so excited and happy.’
‘Your husband must have been thrilled when he finally came home and saw the new baby.’
Paula put her head down, and her shoulders began to tremble.
‘What is it?’ Claudia, concerned at the sudden transformation in the young woman, laid her hand on Paula’s arm.
‘Jack didn’t come home from Iraq. He …’ Paula’s tears began to flow.
‘Oh, Paula. I’m so very sorry. How dreadful for you.’
Tears rolled down the younger woman’s face. She brushed them away quickly.
‘Well, it’s all right. I’ve mostly got over it now. I know I must keep bright for the children. I always knew there was a
risk. Jack had told me before we married that the life was hard on a soldier’s wife. But you never think it’ll happen to you.’
The young woman made an effort and brightened up.
‘Anyway, Isabel’s really happy at Kingdown – I knew she would be. She adores her teacher.’
‘I believe they’ve got a new head there?’
‘That’s right. How did you know that? Mrs Bentley – everyone likes her. They say she’s very different to the old one. Easier to get on with. The old one was a stickler for discipline – mind you, I think that’s a good thing, really. Apparently she was much admired – very good at her job, they said. But very strict.’
‘I’m glad Isabel’s happy there. At least that must be a comfort to you.’
‘Yes, I’ll go over to the school soon … it’s almost time. But it was such a lovely autumn day I thought we’d have a little walk in the park first.’ She hesitated. ‘If you don’t mind me saying, you seem different. I don’t know why I’m saying this … probably putting my big foot into it again. But you seem, well, more relaxed. Perhaps it was just that it was such an awful day … and you were in a hurry. You’d been shopping at Marks … do you remember?’
‘I remember it well. And I remember how patient you were with me.’
‘You didn’t say much. You didn’t talk. Well, I suppose I didn’t give you half a chance. Edith says I’m always prattling on.’
‘I am different,’ said Claudia, quietly. ‘Oh Paula, you’ve had a dreadful time since we last met, and lost someone very dear to you. I’ve done the opposite – I’ve found people I lost forty years ago.’
The younger woman looked at her in surprise.
‘It’s a long story, and I won’t embark on it now. But I was wondering, you were kind enough to ask me tea, and I didn’t even have the manners to ring you up. Do you think … that is, is the invitation still open?’
‘Oh yes!’ Paula smiled happily. ‘Will you really come?’
Claudia nodded.