The Lioness and Her Knight

by Gerald Morris

"No, my lady," Laudine said. "But Rhience here has been his companion before and may be able to find him for you." She turned to Rhience. "Gould you?"

  Rhience looked at Lady Philomela. "When is the trial to take place?"

  "King Arthur gave me three weeks. That was a week ago."

  "I might be able to round up the Knight of the Lion for you in that time," Rhience said after a moment. "I can't promise he'll help, but I'll ask. You stay here, though."

  "Stay here?" Philomela asked. "Why?"

  "Because I don't want to have to guard you while I search. I don't know if the men who stuck knives in your back were common bandits or murderers sent by your sister, but either way, I'd feel better if you stayed in this castle and let Lady Laudine watch over you."

  Laudine looked pleased at this prospect, and Luneta realized glumly that her stay at Laudine's castle was about to become even duller, with Laudine occupied with her new houseguest and Rhience away.

  Rhience grinned at her. "Well, don't just sit there, Luneta. Go saddle up."

  Luneta and Rhience rode first to Godwulf's hermitage, where the good hermit greeted them with open arms. "My friends!" he boomed across the clearing. "Welcome! Have you eaten?"

  Rhience grinned and glanced at Luneta. "That's Godwulf's way of saying 'Bless you, my children.'"

  Godwulf smiled at this but only said, "What good's a blessing if you haven't eaten?"

  Rhience dismounted. "Still plenty of food?"

  "Always. How many times have I told you, God provides like the merry dickens!" Rhience reached up a hand for Luneta. She didn't need help dismounting, but she took it anyway. The hermit continued, "Will you share a meal with me?"

  "Assuredly," Rhience replied, "but we can't stay long. We need Ywain. Has he been here?"

  "Of course he has. God sent him."

  "God sent him?" Rhience asked, one eyebrow raised.

  "Ay," Godwulf said contentedly. "Brother Bleoberis is joining me here in the hermitage, but he had to return to Camelot to ask the king's permission to leave the Round Table first. He left me with plenty of meat, but the day after he rode off, a band of minstrels and actors and such came through, and I fed them. Used up my whole food supply. The tales those fellows could tell! And there was this one boy who could bend himself up near in knots! I've never laughed so hard!"

  Luneta looked at the hermit curiously. "You gave them all your food? Didn't you keep anything back for yourself?"

  "Why should I? I've not been hungry since I came to this haven," Godwulf replied placidly. "God would provide. The next morning, Ywain arrived with meat. That pussycat of his is quite a hunter, you know. We've plenty to spare again."

  "Is Ywain still here?" Rhience asked.

  "He left three days ago," the hermit said. "Do you prefer venison or boar for dinner?"

  They stayed that night at the hermitage, then left the next morning, following Ywain's path to the north. Luneta thought for a while about the hermit Godwulf, then said, "Rhience?"

  "Yes, lass?"

  "You were a monk once, weren't you?"

  "A novice only."

  "But you've known a lot of religious men." Rhience nodded, and Luneta asked, "Are there others like Godwulf?"

  Rhience began to laugh. "Nay. I might have stayed at the monastery if there were."

  "So you think he's really a holy man? But he sounds so ... almost simple-minded!"

  Rhience nodded. "That he does. Sometimes I wish I had his simplicity, but I don't and doubt I ever will. Me, I couldn't have given away my last crumb of food and just expected something else to show up on my door in the morning. I would have thought about it first."

  Luneta nodded emphatically. "That's just what I mean! All this talk about 'God sent Ywain to me' and 'God will provide'—doesn't it make you uncomfortable when someone speaks for God like that?"

  "Not when it's Godwulf," Rhience said. "Oh, I know what you mean. I've heard dozens of religious people talking that way, but in their mouths it was always pompous nonsense. Godwulf's different." Rhience grinned at her. "And I can't even explain why, because I'm different, too. Now here's a path off to the left. We should take it."

  "Why?"

  "God told me so," he replied promptly. Luneta turned a scornful gaze at him, and he shrugged and added, "Also, there's a really big paw print in the soft dirt up there."

  The path took them through quiet forests and over barren heaths. They rode all that day and all the next morning without seeing anyone, so it was a relief the next afternoon when they finally saw another person. Riding around a rocky outcropping, they came upon a cottage where a woman churned butter in the sunny yard. "Greetings, good lady," Rhience said, politely touching his forehead.

  The woman scowled at them and said nothing.

  "I wonder if you could help us," Rhience said doggedly. "We're looking for a knight who might have passed—"

  "Why don't you get out of here?" the woman snapped. "We don't like your kind here."

  Rhience and Luneta stared at each other, stunned. "Our kind?" Luneta asked.

  "Your kind!"

  "Why, thank you, my lady," Rhience said. "You're very kind, too. Now, as I was saying, we're looking for a knight. You can't miss him, because he has a lioness with—"

  But the woman only turned sharply and stalked into her cottage, slamming the door behind her. A moment later, the shutters on the windows banged closed.

  "'You're very kind, too'?" Luneta said.

  "I lied," Rhience said. "But look at that." He pointed to a patch of soft dirt at the edge of the cottage yard. There, clear as day, was the print of a lion's paw.

  Twenty minutes later, they came to a woodcutter hauling a cart along the trail. Rhience waved to him and began to ask if he had seen a knight pass by, but barely had he opened his mouth when the woodcutter said, "If you aren't the ugliest fool I ever seen! How do you ever make someone laugh when any decent person looking at your face would just want to curl up and cry? As for that horrid wench you've got with you, you best keep her away from the kiddies at night or they'll never get to sleep, thinking of her uglies."

  "I beg your pardon?" Rhience said, for once at a loss for words.

  "She looks like she went chasin' after a standing cow and smacked her face into the cow's rear side. Hope the cow didn't turn around and look. Seein' a face like that'd turn milk sour."

  Rhience and Luneta looked at each other blankly. "I say, Luneta, have you been chasing cows? This gentleman says—"

  "Shut up, Rhience." Luneta turned to the woodcutter and said, "Look here, fellow. I don't know why you've taken such a dislike to us—"

  "Because you look like something I'd go out of my way to keep from stepping in is why."

  "—but you can say whatever you like so long as you also tell us if you've seen a knight with a lion pass this way."

  "Will it make you go away if I do? I'll say any manner of lies to keep frights like you out of our land."

  "Have you seen him, then?" asked Rhience.

  The woodcutter shook his head vigorously, said, "Why don't you go away?" and then—as Rhience and Luneta stared in surprise—pointed furtively ahead up the road. "We don't like your type here," he added, and then made a long, rude noise at them.

  "What in the world is going on here?" Luneta demanded as they rode on in the direction the woodcutter had pointed.

  "I may be imagining things, but I don't think they like our type here," Rhience replied.

  "But why? We've done them no harm. They've all seen Ywain, but they won't say a thing about him. Surely he can't have offended everyone in the country already."

  "You wouldn't think so. Maybe it's Lass. You know, some people are just dog fanciers and don't care for cats."

  "Especially cats that can eat their dogs," Luneta said. "But then what about that woodcutter? On the one hand, he tells us to go away, and then he sneaks out a hand and points us down this path."

  "Yes, that does seem to call for an explanation. But I don't have one."r />
  Neither did they come any closer to figuring things out over the next two hours. They met people regularly, and everyone they met was deliberatately rude and told them to get out of their country. Some of them, especially the children, seemed to enjoy being offensive and even illustrated their insults with hand gestures, but others seemed to be reluctantly repeating a memorized message. Finally, Rhience chose one of these latter people, a gray-haired farm wife whose good-natured countenance had dropped into a sulky scowl as soon as she'd seen them coming, and engaged her in conversation.

  "Go away if you know what's good for you," the old farm wife said shortly.

  "Ah, but that's what I've never done well," Rhience said mournfully. "Know what's good for me, I mean. Hard work, for instance. My father always said that it was good for me, but it always gave me sore muscles. Well, I ask you! What sort of sense does that make?"

  The old woman tightened her lips and stared at the ground. "If it's sore muscles you're wanting to avoid, then just go away."

  "It looks as though I'll have sore muscles whatever I do. You see, I've been riding all day, and more of that would give me sore muscles, too. Do you want to see which muscles would be sore?"

  The woman choked back a laugh but resolutely stared at the ground.

  "Another thing my father said," Rhience continued, "was that it would be good for me to travel and learn other customs. He was right, too: this country certainly has some peculiar customs."

  "Rhience," Luneta said wearily, "let's go."

  "Yes, go," the woman said. "We don't want people like you in this land, and Rhience is a stupid name, besides."

  But Rhience wasn't listening. "Of course! Now I understand it, Luneta! This land simply has different customs than we're used to! In this country, you show respect to people by scowling at them and telling them that they're ugly and that you don't like people like them! That's politeness in these parts!"

  The old woman continued staring resolutely at the ground, but she raised one hand to cover her mouth.

  Rhience continued, "Why, I'll wager that we've been offending everyone we met by speaking nicely to them and smiling! We should have been returning insult for insult, and instead we've been saying 'please' and 'thank you'! How insensitive of us!"

  Luneta suppressed a grin. The old woman growled, "That's a silly idea, but it's no more than I'd expect from a clodpole like you."

  "Oh, no, not at all," Rhience replied at once. "I'm sure that you're a much greater clodpole than I! And cross-eyed too!"

  At last the woman looked up, her eyes wide with astonishment. Rhience nodded to Luneta. "Come, lass, where are your manners? Insult the woman!"

  "I ... I'm afraid I've not been brought up very well," Luneta said. "I can't think of a single horrid thing to say!"

  Rhience sighed. "I shall have to help you, I suppose. Luneta, don't you think that this fine woman's face looks like a wart on a fishwife's bottom?"

  "Yes, of course. I should have said so at once," Luneta said, fighting back giggles.

  "And her eyes like pox scars? And her nose like a bleeding pustule crawling with worms?"

  The old woman's shoulders began to shake, and her face contorted as she struggled against laughter. Rhience waited until she had just managed to regain control, and then he whispered, "Donkey breath, too."

  The woman burst into laughter. "You ass!" she said, gasping. "You'll be the death of me, but I can't help laughing."

  "Can you tell me why everyone's so surly, then?" Rhience asked.

  The woman looked around quickly, then nodded. "We has to, you see. The lord of these lands has made it a law that all his vassals have to discourage every traveler who passes through. Any man who doesn't insult a stranger loses all his property, and any woman has to go sew with the prisoners. And Sir Carius and the Brothers have spies everywhere!"

  "Why?" Luneta asked, but the woman only shook her head and again looked around her fearfully.

  Rhience said, "Quickly, then, and you can get back to abusing us as you ought: Have you heard of a knight with a lion passing through here?"

  The woman nodded quickly. "He went to the master's castle. It's that way, in the center of the village. He wouldn't go away, either."

  "Thank you. You're a beastly woman."

  The woman tried, not very successfully, to scowl, and said loudly, "And you're a nasty brute. Just the sort of people we don't want around here." With that, the woman winked, then stalked disdainfully away.

  X. The Land of Diradvent

  An hour later, Luneta and Rhience came to the village the woman had told them about and rode toward the castle that rose from its center. As they passed through the town, villagers lined the streets, hissing and calling out insults at them. Some threw rotten food. "I wonder if they treated Ywain like this," Luneta said, hunching slightly as something unidentifiable but very soggy arched high above her head.

  "Don't bother ducking," Rhience said softly. "Either these townspeople are the worst shots I've ever seen, or they're taking great pains to miss us. This is all for show. And no, I doubt they threw things at Ywain. Would you pelt a knight who had a lion at his side?"

  Once they entered the castle, though, they received a very different reception. A slender servant in a lush velvet livery met them in the courtyard, favoring them with a deep, obsequious bow and bidding them welcome on his master's behalf. "My master begs your pardon for the churlish behavior of the villagers," the servant said smoothly. "He has warned them, but truly they are like children."

  Luneta glanced once at Rhience, who only smiled sardonically. "It must be a sad trial to your master," he said. "I should be surprised if he ever has visitors, with such rude villagers at his gates."

  The servant bowed again. "Indeed, it can be very lonely for my master, ruling such simple-minded people. But he loves his subjects and remains with them always."

  "Admirable," murmured Rhience. "I'm sure that my lady here, Lady Luneta, should like to meet this noble landlord. What is his name?"

  "Sir Garius, and he will be in raptures to meet the Lady Luneta," the servant said, his face a mask of empty politeness. Only his eyes seemed alive, as they flickered over Luneta's and Rhience's gear. "I see that you carry a sword, friend," the servant said to Rhience. "Is that usual for jesters?"

  Rhience smiled, his face as bland as the servant's. "I carry it for show when I accompany Lady Luneta; I should hardly know what to do with it if she were to be in danger."

  The servant nodded with satisfaction, then snapped his fingers. At once two grooms appeared and took their horses' reins. Luneta and Rhience glanced at each other, then dismounted and watched their horses being led away. Rhience's sword was still on his saddle, and Luneta's magical supplies were still in her saddlebags. She felt suddenly vulnerable and moved closer to Rhience as the velvet valet bowed them through the great door into the keep.

  They came into a vast entrance hall, evidently the heart of the castle. The walls were lined with doors, all closed and barred, and from the center of the hall rose a great stone staircase. The servant pointed at two chairs, and then, to Luneta's surprise, disappeared.

  "I almost felt more welcome in the village," Rhience commented. "For all his smiles, this gentleman is hardly pleased to see us."

  "Do you think Ywain is here?" Luneta asked.

  "Let's look," Rhience replied, walking to the first of the closed doors, removing the bar, and pushing it open.

  "I'll try upstairs," Luneta said, running lightly up the steps. At the top were more barred doors and, branching off to either side, dark corridors. Luneta checked first behind the doors but found only dusty, unused bedchambers. Then she turned down the first corridor. In this hall, there were no doors, barred or otherwise, or windows. Luneta decided she would turn back once it got too dark to see, but just before the darkness became absolute, the passage ended at a very solid oaken door. Like every other door in this castle, it was barred, but this time when Luneta removed the bar and pushed, it di
dn't budge. This door was evidently barred on both sides. She was just about to return to Rhience when she heard a faint sound from the other side of the door. Luneta concentrated her inner ear at the door and listened: inside a woman was sobbing.

  This was no solitary woman locked in her room, though. Something in the echoic quality of the sound indicated that the weeping woman was at the other end of a large room, and as Luneta listened, she heard another woman's voice, trying to comfort the crier. Then a man's voice broke in, gruffly telling them both to be quiet, and all sounds stopped. As Luneta looked uncertainly at the door, Rhience's voice came from the end of the hallway: "Luneta! I've found him!" Almost reluctantly, Luneta returned to the top of the stairs, where Rhience and Ywain awaited her.

  "Luneta," Ywain said, with an anxious smile. "I must apologize to you. It was very rude for me to slip away so suddenly from Laudine's castle. Are you angry?"

  Her mind still occupied with the crying woman, Luneta at first didn't understand what he was talking about. "Oh, that," she said at last. "Don't be silly. You were quite right. I was making plans for you and Laudine, and I shouldn't have been."

  "Whether you know it or not," Rhience said wryly, "that's a magnificent concession for Luneta. To admit that she might not have known what was best for someone ... an incredible display of humility."

  "Shut up, Rhience," Luneta said automatically.

  Ywain smiled and changed the subject. "Rhience says that you've come looking for me, but he didn't have time to tell me why."

  Luneta briefly remembered Philomela's legal problems and the trial by combat, but she put them from her mind. Glancing again down the hallway behind her, she thought furiously. "Come back down to the entrance hall. Let's not let that servant know that we've been looking around."

  "Why not?" Rhience asked.

  "They're hiding something. Come on," Luneta said, hurrying down the steps.

  "What's the matter?" Rhience asked when they were at the foot of the stairs.

  "Where did you find Ywain?" Luneta asked.

  "That doorway there leads to another room and then to another room beyond that. Ywain was in the third room."