by Starr, Jude
I took a number of deep breaths. Only the future would tell us if we could make it work. Chill out, Iris, he loves you. I reminded myself.
Calvin fell asleep soon after the plane took off. I watched him, studied him as he slept. How lovely his lips were, how perfect his nose was. How I missed the color of his eyes when they were shut. I took a couple of pictures of him with my phone. Photos I could stare at when I found myself alone in my own bed again. I hated the idea of being alone, but I knew it would happen sooner or later.
I went through the other pictures on my phone and laughed at some of the photos my sister had taken. Some were from the Sunset Bar and some were taken randomly at home on the ranch. What struck me the most, apart from how hot Calvin looked, had everything to do with how he watched me in the pictures. In his eyes, I could see lust, and seemed as madly in love with me, as I was with him.
I cuddled closer to him, until the flight attendant woke us up to let us know the plane was about to land.
I’m home. We’re home.
Walking into his apartment, I discovered all the Christmas decorations were gone, all clean away, and it surprised me, but it also saddened me. Our loving Christmas nest had disappeared. “What happened?”
“The apartment was a mess when we left, so I asked Ms. Clare to come in while we were away. She helps around here.”
“Ms. Clare… okay. Will I meet her?”
“Probably.” My muscles tensed at the idea of having another woman in Calvin’s apartment and Calvin seemed to notice. “Don’t worry, she’s old enough to be my mother.” He kissed my forehead to comfort me. “Are you jealous, kitten?
Stupid, Iris. I did think about him and her, in that way, but I didn’t want to admit it. “No, of course not. I just have a lot on my mind. Sorry.”
He quirked an eyebrow. “Anything you want to talk about?”
I shook my head. “No, I’m fine.”
“When a woman says she’s fine, it’s a lie. It’s bullshit, Iris. Tell me what’s going on.”
I sighed, not wanting to talk about how insecure I was about the upcoming days. “It’s nothing, really.”
“Lie,” he said, sounding irritated. He locked the door behind him and brought our suitcase into the laundry.
Calvin left me alone, standing in the living room. A shiver ran down my spine. Fuck, I had ruined our return home. Tonight was supposed to be a fun night back in our familiar ground and now, I had infuriated him by not wanting to tell him about my fears about not seeing him enough. I had gotten to the point where his cologne was my drug, his kisses my sweet addiction and him, the only oxygen I needed. He made me selfish, I would never stop desiring him and I wanted to keep Calvin to myself.
“Baby… stop.” I said quietly, but he continued on his way towards the bedroom. I followed him, wanting to explain my behaviour.
“If you’re worried about Ms. Clare, kitten, you’re wrong. There is nothing to worry about. She’s a nice woman but there is never going to be anything between us, for Christ’s sake. She a middle-aged woman who helps me around here, that’s all.”
“It’s not about her, Calvin. What we shared in the past few days…” my voice tapered off, as I struggled to work out how to tell him how stupid I was being.
His face changed, his expression pained. “Are you leaving me?” His voice was barely louder than a whisper when he spoke.
“No, Calvin – absolutely not. Let me finish explaining.” He sat on the bed his eyes locked on mine. I stood before him and took a deep breath. “What we’ve shared in the past few days – they were the best days of my life, okay? We’ve spent so much time together, and I got really attached to being with you. I’m in love with you. I love you, Calvin, but I’m terrified of what’s coming next.”
“Why? Nothing’s going to change,” he protested.
I hated myself for doing this to him; after all he had done for me. He had been so good, and it had been so refreshing to spend so much time with him, but I knew what I was going to tell him might hurt his feelings.
“I’m going back to Broadway Hall. School is about to start and I’ll have to work nights and weekends to make ends meet. I know you work a lot; it’s what you thrive on. You have a lot of responsibilities and you love what you do, but I can’t see when or how we’re going to make the time to see one another. I don’t want to lose what we have, Calvin. You mean too much to me, to let you go.”
“Come here, kitten.” He waited for me to reach him and took my hands in his. “Never think about losing me. I won’t ever let you go. You are the light of my fucking life, Iris. My companies are important to me, we’ve talked about this – but I’ll do everything I can to spend time with you. You’re my future and what matters the most to me. You’re not the only one who fell in love, Iris, because I… fuck… I love you so much. I want you to move in here with me – it’ll be easier on both of us.”
“I will move in with you, Calvin... just not yet.” I cupped his jaw and rubbed my thumb against his beard. “Give me some time to think. I want to be with you, I just don’t want us to rush into things. It’s been less than two weeks since we got together.”
He heaved a sigh, sounding desperate. “Only two weeks, but I’ve waited for someone to love me all my life,” he admitted quietly.
He broke my heart. A whimper escaped from my mouth before I even realised I was crying. I crawled onto his lap and put my arms around him. “You have me – always.”
“Stay with me, then,” he begged quietly.
I hated the weight that came with those words. Never in my life had I faced something like this. I loved him enough to live with him, but I was scared that he would find me boring after a month and kick me out. Waiting represented my own sense of security, I had to make sure our feelings would survive longer than a month. Deep inside of me, I knew they would, but my head kept warning me to remain cautious. “Soon.”
He held me for long minutes without saying anything at all. We had faced our first impasse. He wanted something and I thought it was too rushed. I trusted him with my heart, but time remained the only thing I truly needed from him.
“I love you, never doubt my love for you, Cal,” I begged him to believe in my feelings for him.
He brushed his lips across my temple and pressed delicate kisses down the side of my face. “I never have, kitten.”
“It’s good to be home.”
“It’s good to have you in my arms, here. You’re what matters to me, Iris.” With that declaration, I kissed him with everything I had in me. All the love, passion, desire and admiration. He responded to my attack with the same fervent hunger.
His phone ringing interrupted us.
“Rain check, baby, rain check.” He took the phone out of his pocket and stood up, stepping away from me. “Banks.” I could hear some of the words spoken, but couldn’t make out what he was saying. “Yeah, we’re back, Justin.” He listened and rubbed his forehead tiredly. “I’ll be there in forty-five minutes.” He ended the phone call with a sigh, meeting my gaze. “I’m going to have to work tonight, kitten. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” I meant it.
“Have you tried to reach your friend?” We could pick her up in thirty minutes, on the way to The Whiskey Lounge.”
“I’ll have to text her.” I took my own phone out of my pocket and while I sent the message to Krystal, Calvin tried distracting me with kisses. “You’re not fighting fair, you gave me a rain check and now, you’re teasing me. Game on, baby.”
I completed the text and tucked the phone back into my pocket. Krystal basically had her phone implanted to her hand. I knew she would reply soon.
“I’m a player, kitten. I don’t ever lose.” His laughter echoed across the walls of the room. “But I really need to shower and get to the bar. After that, I’ll definitely play.” I could hear the excitement in his voice. “Game on, Hartwell,” he said spanking my ass so loudly, it paralyzed me for a second.
“Calvin Banks!”
I rubbed my ass, which hurt like hell. He hadn’t played nicely this time. “That hurts like a motherfucker!”
His laughter resonated from the bathroom and regardless of the pain radiating off my behind, I laughed, too. The water in the shower turned on, and the temptation to join him nearly drove me wild but he had given me a rain check already. I didn’t want a second one. Well, mainly I didn’t want to disturb him; I knew he had to be at The Whiskey Bar soon. The bar had suffered enough from his absence already.
While I waited, I changed into a sexier outfit, deciding to do anything to tempt him and got something to snack on from the kitchen while texting with Krys.
Iris: Hey girl. Do you want to hang out with me at the lounge tonight?
Krys: Hell yes. What time?
Iris: I’ll be there in less than an hour. I’ll meet you there.
When we got to The Whiskey Bar, Calvin kissed my cheek in a chaste way and went directly into his office. That office – the one where this had all started. A wave of heat ran through me – I would go back in there with no hesitation in a second. His hair was pulled back; his face clean shaven and he had changed his casual clothes for a dark grey suit and a red tie. To say he looked great was quite the understatement. When I’d first met him, I hadn’t cared for his business attire – it hadn’t impressed me but that attitude certainly changed fast enough. I knew now it made him who he was. With me, he acted differently; a nice and charming guy – but at work, his whole attitude changed. He had power, knowledge and looked every bit the successful business man.
A tall dark hair man followed Calvin, keeping pace with him. They walked into the office, and Calvin peeked at me one last time, offering me a small smile. It warmed my heart.
“Iris, Krystal.” Julia calling out to us startled me. I was brought back to the table; but my eyes remained focused on the closed door.
“Hi Julia. How was the party on New Year’s Eve?” I asked curiously.
“It went well, in general. Had a few issues with some drunken idiots, but otherwise, I think we nailed it.” She sounded quite proud of herself. “It would have been fun to have you here.”
“I didn't know about the party until we had flown to Orlando. I wished we could have been here.” I’d loved spending time with my family, but I wished I could have been here, too.
She laughed. “I’m glad you guys were away, if he’d been here, I think Calvin would have lost his mind. That guy, your friend from the other night, he crashed the party. He asked every single staff member where he could find you.”
“Zach?” My heart hitched in my chest and Krystal grabbed hold of my hand, squeezing my fingers.
“He was convinced you were here, no matter how many times we told him you weren’t. He’d had a lot to drink. Security got him inside a taxi and sent him home in the end.” She laughed again. “He must have had the worst hangover ever the following morning.”
“I’m so sorry. Our friendship isn't exactly on good terms at the moment.” I knew I’d broken Zach’s heart, not once, but twice – and at this point, I feared that it would happen again.
Julia shook her head. “It’s alright, girl. Can I get you anything?”
“Tequila shots, please. Four of them” I rolled my eyes. Krys and her tequila. No surprise there – some things never changed.
“I'll have a vodka and cranberry, please.” Maybe I should have ordered two. The thought of Zach trying to find me here was freaking me out. He’d never even tried to contact me by text or phone, so why was he coming here? For someone who wanted to see me so desperately, he hadn’t really tried particularly hard.
I had a lot of news to catch up on with Krys. From Calvin and I getting together, to quitting my job at the restaurant, and starting the new one at the gym. There was a lot of catching up to do.
“So you guys are official now?” Krys asked, taking her last shot of Tequila
A smile laced across my lips. “Yeah, definitely.”
She threw herself into my arms, hugging me strong enough for my ribs to hurt. “I’m so happy for you, Iris.” She released me and sat back in her seat. “When I saw the picture of you two on the internet, I flipped out. But you deserve to be happy. I thought you were going to end up with Zach, but I can understand why you're going out with Calvin.”
What she had said was upsetting. “What do you mean? Do you think I'm with Calvin for the money and his status?”
Krys shook her head determinedly. “Absolutely not. I know you better than that. I was referring to the light in your eyes, both of you looked so much at ease. I don't know what it is, but there's something about him. I think he's definitely a keeper. Plus, he gave me a ride so I could come and hang out with you. How sweet is he?”
I flushed with embarrassment – if she only knew.
“Hey, Iris!” I turned around to see Danielle headed our way, a big grin on her face.
“Hey, Danielle, nice to see you.” She gave me a quick hug and I introduced her to Krys.
“I need a drink.” Danielle rubbed her temples tiredly. “I’m exhausted.”
“Is everything okay?” Something told me it was more than just exhaustion that was bothering her.
“Trouble in paradise.” She laughed. “Some douche bags keep bugging the hell out of me every time I finish my shift at the gym. I wanted to go home, but I ended up coming here to hide out for a while. They’re the wannabe thugs, hanging out at the small snack bar on the corner of the street.”
“What do they want?” I asked, naively.
“Me.” She chuckled, the sound bittersweet. “But I’m not interested. I have certain standards and those guys are just trash.”
“Have you told, Calvin?” I didn’t like the idea of her having to hide out here at the bar, she probably didn’t feel safe and knowing how much Cal cared about her, he would never let these guys do that to her.
She shook her head. “He has enough on his plate. Honestly, they’re just a bunch of idiots trying to get into my pants.” I could tell she was playing it down, but she wouldn’t be here it they really meant her no harm.
“Just be careful, and don’t hesitate to tell Calvin,” I suggested. I didn’t know if Danielle and I were friends, co-workers or what our status might actually be, but she was important to Calvin and for that reason alone, I cared about her. Tonight, I would ask Cal to give her a ride home.
A few cranberry and vodka’s later, a tall handsome man, wearing a designer suit offered me a dance. He’d loosened his red tie, his eyes were tired, but he still had that million dollar smile. A heart-melting smile which had the power to warm up my soul.
“Sweetness,” he said.
It was the one and only word necessary, to let me know exactly where his mind was at.
“Welcome back, baby.” With both of my hands flat against his chest, I could feel his heart beating through his shirt and the heat burned my hands.
He stepped closer, caressing my waist and letting me know what he craved. “Not here, but I want to claim my rain check.”
“You want to go home?”
He kissed me and rapidly deepened the kiss. “I can’t wait.”
I peeked at him through my eyelashes. “You’ll have to wait. We have to drop off Danielle, too. I hope you don’t mind.”
He frowned. “Danielle? Why?” The surprise in his expression confirmed he would definitely be asking more questions. Whether they would be directed towards me or her, I had no clue.
“Because I offered.”
We danced until the end of the song. He twirled me around, bending me backward before kissing me. I adored how he could turn something simple into something special and romantic.
He straightened me up and grinned. “Now, let’s get the fuck out of here before we end up in my office again.”
Chapter 15
We left a trail of clothes from the front door to the bedroom. We tried to make it as far as his bed, but it never happened. Instead, my back was pressed against the wall while Calvin covere
d my skin with wet kisses.
“Justin was trying to talk business, and all I could think about was the feel of your breast in my palm or the softness of your skin against mine.”
“You were away for a very long time.” It had been two hours, maybe even three.
“I’m sorry.” He hitched my leg up to his waist. “I had a lot to catch up on.” He pushed his sex against me, letting me know how much he wanted this.
“I thought about how I could seduce you all night as revenge for being given a rain check, but you know what? I want you now. I don’t want to play any games.”
“Are you announcing defeat?” he whispered, his lips hovering over my nipple.
“I am,” I muttered.
With no hesitation he drew circles around my nipple with his tongue, sending ripples of sensation throughout my body.
“You are such a tease, Calvin Banks.”
“And you love it, Iris Hartwell.” He caressed my breast with hungriness in his eyes. “What do you want from me, sweetness?”
“Take me, now, here. Just take me.”
He moaned. “I like how desperate you are to have me.” He rubbed his cock between my thighs, teasing me, as if I could take anymore. “Are you ready now?” he asked pulling back from me, just a little.
“Don’t go anywhere. I’m ready. All yours.”
He looked at me with inviting eyes, his tongue licking across his bottom lip. God, this man had everything to make me fall under his spell.
He ran a hand through his hair breaking his sleek look for the more rebellious beach boy. “Kiss me, sweetness. Show me you love me.”