The scars on her wrists were a reminder of everything she’d fought for and the woman she’d seen hanging from the cross. Each of them brought her attacker closer and closer, and it was up to her to make it right.
Would he still recognize her? There were extra curves gracing her hips, breasts, and thighs that hadn’t been there before. She wasn’t that young girl playing bondage in the corset shop, either. Nor was she the innocent young thing taking direction from Master Cage.
“You’re beautiful.”
Her eyes widened as Ryder’s voice broke the silence, interrupting the revere of her thoughts.
“I didn’t hear you get up.”
He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her, tugging her close. His gaze followed her facial expressions. “Is this alright?”
Was it?
Everything had happened so fast.
She met his gaze, not knowing what she’d say until it left her lips.
“Yes.”
“You were thinking about today.”
Natalia nodded. “I was.” She turned in his arms and lifted her chin to brush her lips across his. At his swift intake of breath, her nipples tightened, and a joyful clench rushed through her lower body. She wanted him again.
Her cat wanted to wind herself around him and climb him like a tree.
“Tell me what’s on your mind.”
She dropped her arms and stepped out of his embrace.
“These scars are a roadmap to the places I’ve been. Who I’ve been.”
“They don’t define you, Natalia.”
“They do. A little.” She shook her head. “I ran. After he did this to me. There was a Dom. I loved him. But I failed.”
“How?”
She lifted her eyes to meet his. “I didn’t trust him enough to love me back.”
“Natalia…”
“I want…” He paused and closed his eyes, his lips pressed in a straight line.
“What do you want, Ryder?” She took his hand in hers and traced the lines with her finger. “I haven’t been with a man before this in seven years. Not since…before.”
“I didn’t realize. The times at the club…”
“Were controlled. Anyway, how could you have known?” She gave a shaky laugh.
“I want to serve you. To be by your side however you wish me to.” His steady eyes bored into hers. “Not because you order me but because in pleasing you, I sometimes get a little of what I need in return. Making you happy…” He stopped, a deep sigh resounding through his chest. “That’s why I’ve been coming to Inferno. The first time I saw you it was over for me.”
Her stomach gave a little flip and she blinked back the sting of happy tears.
“Ryder…”
“It’s a choice. You are a dominant woman. I like that. It doesn’t change who I am to the outside world. It just means we would have a different balance than most.”
“You have to give me time to take all of this in. You’re my mate.” She pressed a kiss to his lips. “But if he’s out there. I need to find him.”
“Who?”
“Cage. He was my Dom. If he’s out there, I have to tell him I’m sorry. I think I saw him at Inferno the other day but I could have just been imagining it.”
A pensive look came over Ryder’s face. “Here. Take my robe.” He lifted a terrycloth robe from a hanger by the door and slipped it over her shoulders. “Your clothes should be out of the dryer in just a bit.”
“When did you have time to do that?” Just then the scent of something delicious wafted through the air. “Did you cook something?”
“While you were sleeping.” A small smile tugged at his lips. “Crock pots are a wonderful thing.”
Her stomach growled as if in agreement.
She laughed, placing a kiss on his cheek. “You are so right.”
“Come on. Let’s see about your clothes.” He left the bathroom, completely comfortable in his nudity.
She could get used to this. Yes. Yes, she could.
***
Ryder sat Natalia down at the dining room table. He served her the hearty beef stew he’d prepared with her in mind and tended to her every need. He’d never been so content in his life. Or as miserable. The place where she’d bit him still throbbed. It was significant. He knew that, but he also knew she had to get whatever was between her and the man she loved before him out of her system or she would never be free to move forward. He had to tell her about Cage. How she didn’t know he was the new owner of Inferno was astounding.
She had seen him, but maybe she hadn’t been ready.
His own bowl of stew in hand, he sat down at the table and began to eat. “We need to talk.”
“This is wonderful.” She finished her bowl and took a drink of water. Natalia nodded, her eyes wary. “Go on.”
“You mentioned your former Dom when we were talking earlier.”
“I did.”
“I think there’s someone you need to meet.” He stabbed at the congealing meat and vegetables in his bowl, no longer hungry. He had to help her find closure. Even if it meant losing her. “If you’re done eating.”
“Who?”
“You’ll see. But first, let’s get you dressed.”
***
He took her home to change clothes and freshen up. It was strange having him in her house while she showered in the next room. As a Domme, she’d laid everything out. Formality was her buffer. But now that she saw Ryder in a different way. Not just Rye the submissive but as a man, the more she wanted him. In her life. In her bed. As her mate. And her animal was comfortable with him.
Niggles, her cat, played with him on the rug in the living room while she slipped into some new clothes and did her makeup. She needed all of her faculties working at top speed if he was going to start dragging her around and showing her off.
The woman in her didn’t mind, but the cop part of her brain kept churning. The Bondage Ripper was still out there.
Claws pushed against her nails and a fang snagged her lip.
“Down girl.” She would handle this. There was no other way. This time she wasn’t alone. Ryder would be there with her.
She tugged on a fresh pair of jeans and a Peter Murphy tee, not caring where they were going. After the day she had, it was all about comfort coming home to a cup of hot tea and maybe a warm sub to share it with.
“Are you ready to go?” She had to get out of here. Her mind was just going crazy. Natalia reached down and scratched Niggle’s head. “You be good.” The cat stretched and gave her an irritated look before he took off down the hall to her bedroom.
“You interrupted his tummy scratch.”
“Sorry.”
“Let’s go.” He held the door for her while she secured it, and they wandered out into the night.
Chapter Eight
“I have to find her.” Cage stared at the camera footage on the screen, nausea churning in his gut. What he’d been looking for had been staring him in the face, and he didn’t even know it. Natalia had been here, right under his nose. Did she even know he was here? He doubted it.
How was it that he hadn’t scented her? They’d been only a few feet apart. It didn’t make sense.
She loved him. Once. He shifted camera angles and times based on the information from Shelley’s report. There he was. Like Natalia, he’d changed his appearance. His hair was an umber shade of brown to the point of almost being black. His complexion was darker like he’d spent some time in a tanning bed and not the suburban WASP type he’d been seven years ago.
A knock sounded on the door, and Shelley entered the office. “There’s someone here to see you.”
“Who?”
The male submissive he’d seen with the redheaded Domme downstairs strode in, a woman at his side with long red hair. It was when he caught sight of her face that the breath left his body. This time there was no mask to hide her from him.
His wolf howled in longing and it took every ounce of willpower
not to gather her in his arms and reclaim her.
“Natalia…”
“Cage.” The longing in her voice made his guts rip to shreds.
“Mr. Maxwell, I’m Ryder Jamison. In your system, I’m known as Rye” He paused. “I believe we’ve seen each other around the club from time to time.”
“Go on.” Cage got up from behind his desk. He didn’t want to talk to the sub. He wanted to talk to Natalia.
“I’m also working with Natalia and the police department on a case in which I believe you are, unfortunately, familiar.”
“I don’t understand.”
“The Bondage Ripper. I presume you’ve watched the news. There are things that haven’t been presented the public at large.” Ryder glanced at Natalia.
“You can tell him.”
“Tell me what?”
“I’m a psychologist working with the department because of the BDSM elements of the case.”
“Okay.” His gaze strayed to Natalia, but she’d turned away, her eyes focused on a spot on the fish tank in the corner of the room.
“The same person who has been committing these murders is the same man who attacked Natalia seven years ago.”
Cage started. “How the hell do you know that?”
“Because he wrote my name in blood at the scene.” Natalia’s gaze met his, and for a moment he could see the girl he used to know in their depths. Then the moment was gone. This Natalia was stronger, even in her fear. Her body lusher, her mannerisms surer.
Her scent was different.
“Natalia…” Ryder considered Cage and his eyes snapped to Natalia. “Well. I think this one’s all you.”
“Ryder…” Her voice hitched and then he saw her stiffen her stance. “You’re right.”
“I believe you two have things you need to say to each other. I’ll be just outside.” His gaze trailed to Natalia. “If you need me, call.” He trailed a finger down the side of her face and placed a kiss on her cheek. “You can do this.”
A low growl started in Cage's belly and worked its way out before he could stop it. He kissed her. The motherfucker kissed her right in front of him. Cage wanted to rip his head off and shove him out the office door himself. But then he looked closer and saw something else. She was scared, and that took the rage right out of him.
She nodded, her face white and her eyes wide. The sub strode to the door and shut it behind him with a quiet click.
“I can’t believe it’s you,” she whispered. “All this time. I didn’t know you were still here. I mean…I thought I’d seen you half a dozen times but I always thought it was wishful thinking.”
He’d chosen to stay behind the scenes deliberately. Watching through cameras. Keeping his club goers safe. What point had there been to playing after she was gone?
“Inferno is mine. I bought it from Julian after…”
“After I left.”
“You didn’t let me see you.” His voice was gruff but he had to say it. Need from the darkest corners of his heart broke free. “I needed to know you were all right. That he…this hadn’t destroyed you.”
Tears slid down Natalia’s face and her lips trembled. “But he had. For a long time, he had.”
“No. You’re still here.”
A bitter laugh erupted from her lips. “And it’s taken me years.”
“Who is he?” It was a raw question, but he had to know.
Her gaze slid toward the door.
Chapter Nine
Natalia was overwhelmed. Cage was here. In the same room with her as Ryder waited outside. He should be here, too, she realized. But she needed to answer Cage’s question.
“I…”
He approached her, his presence just as large as it had been all those years ago. Cage bent down and pressed his lips to hers. The softness. The steel. God, but she craved him. Her fingers curled around his arms and then slid around his back, holding him close.
“Natalia…”
It came flooding back to her. All the tenderness and the end of it all. But she didn’t want it to be. Her thoughts drifted to Ryder and back to her former Master. She wanted them both, but for different reasons. Was she strong enough to take what she wanted? Or was she the weak girl who ran when something frightened her?
She’d lost so much time already.
“Cage.” She laid her head against his chest and listened to the familiar heartbeat. “I’ve missed you, but I’m not the same woman I was.”
“Neither of us is.”
A chuckle escaped her lips. “Well, I hope not.”
“Oh. Yeah. Not a woman. Not even close.” His hand smoothed over her hair, and she sighed.
“There’s something you need to know.”
“Go on.”
“When he…” Natalia swallowed.
Cage nodded, his gaze locked on hers.
“He bit me.” She wrapped her arms around her middle, lowered her lids and let the lynx come into her eyes.
Then she opened them.
His eyebrows shot up in surprise.
“Natalia.”
“No.” She shook her head. “I had a lot more to deal with than a few scars. This…” she waved a hand over herself. “This was… unexpected.”
“I didn’t know.”
Natalia pursed her lips and nodded. “I didn’t want you to.”
“But why?” His nostrils flared, emotion flashing in his eyes. “I could have helped you.”
“No.” Natalia put a hand on his chest.
“I don’t understand. I would have done anything for you. Been anything.”
“That’s the whole point. I had to do it for myself.”
“Oh, honey.” He drew her into his arms and she let him, reveling in the warm scent of his skin. She laid her head against his chest and sighed.
“You smell different. That’s why I didn’t know it was you. I’ve been on the floor. Hell, I even thought I saw you with your sub the other day.”
“Lynx.”
“Ah.”
The rumble of his voice through his chest made her wrap her arms around him all the tighter. She didn’t want to let go. Ever.
“And the sub?”
Natalia sighed. “My cat seems to have claimed him for a mate.”
“And you?”
“Yes.”
“What is he?”
“He’s my mate.” She gave him a smile. “When I’m with him, I feel happy. Whether as a sub or something else.”
“I see.”
But did he? How could he possibly when she wasn’t sure what to make of it herself? All she knew was she wanted them both. But for different reasons. Her body responded to Cage's nearness and judging from the hardness of his cock, he felt the same.
She lifted her lips to his and he groaned as she pressed herself against him.
“Natalia.” His eyes glittered with the wolf inside him and her tummy did a little flip.
Mate.
Her cat was relentless, rubbing against her from the inside, urging her to complete their bond.
Greedy girl.
It was terrible, but true. She wanted them both and she meant to have them. That is, if he felt the same.
“Do you still want me?” She breathed, lifting her gaze to his even as she drew the tee shirt over her head and began unbuttoning her jeans.
“What the hell kind of question is that? I never wanted you to leave.”
“Good.” She kicked off her jeans and her panties followed in short order. She braced herself against his desk, ass in the air.
With an oath, he moved behind her. Rustling clothes and a zipper later and he was on her, the head of his cock pressed against her entrance.
“Mine.” He growled, pushing forward. He stretched her wide, his girth and breadth dominating her even as he took her hips and drove deep.
“You smell of him.” Cage growled, thrusting harder.
“Both of you,” she panted. “I need both of you.”
He groaned against her
, teeth scraping down the marks on her back. She felt his awareness as he stiffened and shook her head.
“No. Heal me. Now. That doesn’t matter. Not anymore.”
“Oh, baby.” He pressed a kiss against one scar and then the next, plunging deeper and deeper until she was hanging from the desk, keening her pleasure. “How do we do this?”
“Very…carefully.” She gasped as he moved within her and she never wanted it to end.
His thick fingers teased her clit and she exploded all over his cock, crying out as he moaned as his own release shuddered through him.
With a roar, he sank his teeth into her shoulder, marking her as his mate. His upper arm brushed against her lips and she took hold, leaving her own imprint in his flesh.
He’d marked her.
Holy God.
Something he never would have done before. She’d begged and begged him but he would never do it. And it seemed as if she’d done the same to him in return.
They had a future together. All three of them. It wasn’t all that uncommon in their circles to make a home with three, but it was going to take some getting used to.
But first, she had to do something about the taint touching their lives. An idea took root and he withdrew, turning her around in his arms.
“I want you forever. And if that means sharing you, I’ll learn.”
“Okay.”
“That’s all you have to say is okay?”
Natalia bit her lip as she realized Ryder had probably heard everything that had gone on inside the office, despite not being a shifter himself. What he was exactly, they would discuss later, but for now they had a much bigger problem.
The smile slid from her face as she pulled back and met Cage's gaze. “I have an idea. You’re not going to like it but I think this is our only shot.”
“Shot at what?”
“Catching the man who’s trying to kill me.”
***
Ryder had taken her home from Inferno, hardly saying a word. She started to bring up what happened in the office but one look at his face told her now was not the best time.
Craving Her Mates (My Wicked Mates Book 1) Page 7