His cock twitched against her.
Sleep. Sleep. Sleep.
His lips met the curve of her shoulder, and she felt herself go damp. She tried to convince herself that he was just getting comfortable and his lips had landed there by accident.
He moaned.
Lordy, Lordy.
“I want to make love to you,” he whispered.
She forced herself to stay still, because she was worried that if she moved at all, she’d climb on top of him and ride him like a bull. This had to be a test. He was seeing how trustworthy she was. She’d said she wouldn’t let him touch her.
“But you said…” Her words drifted into the darkness. She knew what he’d said, and she knew he felt the same bond between them that had started as protector and victim and changed at breakneck speed into so much more.
He shifted her onto her back and gazed into her eyes with so much raw emotion, she lost her ability to speak.
“I don’t want to fuck you, Stormy. I want to make love to you. There’s a difference. I’ve never wanted to make love to a woman before. Fuck? Yes. Take? Yes. Make love? Only you, sweetheart. That is, if you want me to.” He touched her cheek, and the intimacy of it sparked an immediate and total release of the emotions she’d been trying to deny.
“Yes,” she whispered. “Logan…”
“Not a fuck. I don’t want to be one in a line of dicks, Stormy. I want you to trust me, to be with me and only me.”
“No line…God, Logan. I haven’t even been with a guy in months. I’ve been trying to push away my feelings for you and remain strong, but I can’t. They’re too much. Too real.”
He searched her eyes, and she knew as he slanted his lips over hers and kissed her tenderly that he saw the real her breaking through as strongly as she felt it. Everything about the way he kissed her, the way his hands moved over her, was different. He was caressing instead of groping, as if he were touching her for the first time. He gently removed her shirt, raining kisses down her neck, over her breasts, and then he came up and loved her mouth again. She’d never been touched like this. She felt special, cherished, and it had been so long since she’d been herself that she didn’t know what to do with the emotions burning inside her.
His hands played gingerly over her ribs as he kissed his way south, lingering around her belly button, placing enticing kisses low on her belly. She wanted him to go lower, wanted to feel his mouth on her, his tongue inside her, but he was moving up her body again, torturing her in the most delicious way. Lapping each taut nipple, heightening her anticipation with every slick of his tongue, every touch of his hands. She felt the facade she’d been hiding behind slipping away. He was breaking through the prickly persona she’d worn like a coat, quieting the fear Kutcher had instilled in her and reawakening deeper emotions she’d long ago buried.
“You’re so beautiful, Stormy.”
Stormy. Guilt threaded through her. He wasn’t Kutcher or someone who was out to hurt her, and she was still treating him like he was. He gripped her hips and kissed the tops of her thighs, looping his finger into her panties and dragging them down, leaving her bare beneath his glorious body. He splayed his hands over her thighs. The heat of his calloused palms seeped into her bones as he brought his mouth to her center. She bucked against his mouth with the first flick of his tongue over her sensitive flesh. He tightened his grip on her legs, tucking them beneath his arms, against his muscular sides, and lifting her hips off the mattress, allowing him better access to drive her out of her freaking mind.
When he sank his fingers deep inside her, her toes curled under.
“Ah, you like that,” he said before sinking his teeth into her inner thigh.
She gasped. “Logan…”
“Did I hurt you?”
“God, no. Please, more, Logan. More.”
His lips quirked up with a devilish grin. “Don’t worry, baby. I’ll get you there.”
His mouth came down again while his fingers played over the spot that made her blood hotter, heavier, and her breaths shallow. Waves of pleasure rolled down her spine, through her limbs. He teased that spot over and over. She came hard and fast, infused with shocks that radiated through her chest. He lapped and loved her through the very last wave of pleasure. He must have slipped off his briefs, because when he sealed his lips over hers, she felt the wide tip of his arousal pressing against her wet center.
Jesus, everything felt bigger with Logan, better, more real. And if there was one thing Stella wanted, it was real. She clutched at his biceps, and her stomach fluttered. She didn’t just want real. She wanted Logan.
Guilt felt like a wall standing between them.
“Wait, Logan.”
***
LOGAN KNEW HE’D taken a chance by opening himself up to Stormy, but he couldn’t resist. Now the fear in her eyes nearly flattened him. Had she not wanted this? Had he scared her off? If this wasn’t real, he knew for a fact that he’d never know what real felt like.
“Wait.” Her voice softened.
Her hands slid down his arms, and he felt hope slipping away. They came to rest on his cheeks. God, he loved her touch.
“Stormy, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
She pressed one finger to his lips. “Shh. You didn’t do anything wrong, Logan. You did everything right.” She smiled up at him, and he saw her remaining walls come crumbling down. “My name is Stella. Stella Krane.”
He let out a breath he hadn’t realized had been caught in his throat and dropped his forehead to hers. She trusted him, and in doing so, she righted everything that had felt wrong with his world since his father died.
“Stella. I’m falling hard for you, Stella Krane.”
A trickle slipped from the corner of her eye. He kissed the salty tears, then lowered his mouth to hers as their bodies joined together. He buried himself deep, perched above the woman who opened his heart and made him feel again.
Logan had never felt so alive or so vulnerable.
Stella rocked her hips, and he pressed in deeper, keeping her still.
“I just want to feel you wrapped around me for a minute.”
“Yes.” Her legs circled his waist, locked at the ankles.
He moved slowly at first, eking out every second of loving her he could. Logan reared up, drinking in the flush on her chest, the sheen of sweat on her brow. Her eyes darkened as he thrust in deep. She frantically clutched at the sheets, fighting her release.
“More, Logan. God, give me more.”
He gently turned her onto her stomach and lifted her onto her knees, kissing the hollow at the base of her spine, teasing her clit, weighing what she really wanted from him. How far she wanted this to go.
“Take me, Logan. I can’t wait any longer.”
She pressed her ass back as he entered her wet center. He wanted everything with Stella. He wanted to climb into her skin and experience every emotion she did. He wanted to make her feel things she’d never felt before, but mostly he wanted her to feel safe every second they were together.
He pressed his chest to her back and nibbled the shell of her ear. “I want to touch you, Stella. I want to touch your ass.”
“Yes.” One long, heated breath.
“You’re sure?”
“God, Logan. I want this. I want you.”
He kissed his way down her spine, his heart racing with anticipation, full with emotion. He spread her cheeks and teased her hole with his thumb, earning a sweet, sexy moan. She moved in time to each hard thrust as he taunted, but he didn’t enter her ass. It was too much to resist. He was afraid she’d change her mind, and there was no going back. He gripped her hips and drove his cock into her center deeper.
“Keep touching me, Logan. I love when you do that.”
His slick chest met her back as he reached around to her mouth. She sucked his fingers, nearly making him come. He slid one wet finger into her tightest orifice and felt her sex go impossibly tighter. A heady groan escaped his lungs as he re
ached around her waist with his other hand to stroke the secret spot he knew she loved. She pressed back, taking his finger in deeper.
“Ohgodohgod. Logan.”
She panted, rising up and bringing them as close as two people could get. Her head fell back as the orgasm tore through her, claiming her, pulsating around Logan’s hard shaft. He wrapped his arms around her as she seated herself fully on his lap, her inner muscles still claiming them both.
“God, Logan. That was…” She panted. “Amazing.”
He gathered her hair over one shoulder and kissed the back of her neck.
“I want you on top of me so I can watch you come.”
He lifted her easily by the waist, lay on his back, then lowered her onto his slick erection.
“Oh, God.” She pressed her palms to his chest as she rode him. “You feel so good.”
“Good doesn’t even come close...”
It took all his focus to keep from coming. She was so beautiful, opening up to him, riding him, becoming one with him. He couldn’t wait another second; had to see her come so he could give in to the mounting pressure of his own release. He pulled her down on top of him and kissed her hard.
“Come for me again.”
He sucked one breast into his mouth while squeezing her other nipple between his index finger and thumb.
“Ohgodohgodohgod.”
He brought his hand between her legs and stroked her the way she loved. She gripped his shoulders and slammed her eyes shut as she spiraled over the edge. He swept her beneath him mid-orgasm and drove into her hard and fast, prolonging her orgasm and taking him right up to the edge. His balls tightened, and his body flashed hot as he ground out her name—Stella—and surrendered to his own intense release.
Chapter Ten
STELLA AWOKE TO an empty bed, a full heart, and a head full of worry. Last night she’d felt closer to Logan than she’d ever felt to anyone, but would it be weird with him today? What if he regretted opening up to her?
The bed is empty. Of course he regrets it.
She knew it was too much to hope for, to be normal again. To allow herself to feel something for a man again. Rational thinking went out the door as hatred for Kutcher pushed her insecurities, which had magnified over the last few months, to the surface, convoluting her thoughts. Worry turned to disappointment, which quickly turned to anger.
She threw the blankets off and stomped into the bathroom, where she found fresh towels and all of her personal items unpacked.
Hm.
That was a sweet gesture for a guy who regretted being with her.
She showered and came out of the bathroom wrapped in a plush towel and knelt beside her bags. Logan came into the room and sat on the edge of the bed.
“I already unpacked for you. I hope you don’t mind, but I figured it might make you more comfortable.” He was shirtless, wearing a pair of faded jeans that rode dangerously low on his hips.
“Oh.” She rose, and he reached for her, drawing her down to his lap. “Thank you.”
He had an easy smile—definitely not the look of a man who was using her. He looked more relaxed than she’d ever seen him.
“You okay?” He brushed her wet hair from her shoulder.
“Uh-huh.” Hope swelled inside her, and when fear tried to quell it, she forced that fear aside. She’d felt enough disappointment in her life. She wanted to enjoy this, to allow herself to feel happy again.
“Embarrassed about last night?”
“No. I’m just really nervous.” She might as well get all her fears out in the open; otherwise however long they were together would suck.
“Stella—”
“Wait. You don’t have to say it. I know. Last night was a fluke. We got caught up in the heat of the moment. I get it.”
“Sweetheart, is that how you feel?” The tone was soft, but she saw the muscles in his jaw jump.
“Is…isn’t that what you were going to say?” Why was she speaking so softly?
“No.” His baby blues pierced a path straight to her heart. “I don’t say things I don’t mean. I don’t do things I don’t want to. If I had wanted to fuck you, I’d have fucked you.” He looked away, his eyes filled with confusion. “Maybe I suck at this. I’ve never felt for anyone what I feel for you, so maybe that felt like fucking to you, but to—”
“No. No, that wasn’t…that at all.” She couldn’t even say fuck right now. Before meeting Kutcher, she’d hardly ever sworn. She hadn’t realized until this very second how much of herself Kutcher had stolen.
“Logan, I feel it, too. But something is happening to me. I don’t understand it, and I don’t know how to describe it, but…” She pressed her lips together, trying to figure out how to explain what she was feeling. “The person I was before Kutcher isn’t the same one I am now, or at least not completely. I know that sounds crazy, but when we were together that first time at my apartment, that was the girl I became with Kutcher.”
“I understand.” His eyes were filled with compassion, but his jaw was still tight.
“No. I worry you don’t, and a guy like you…” She dragged her eyes down his impressive physique, feeling like she’d better memorize it quickly, because like everything else good in her life, it probably wouldn’t last long. Some sexy chick who liked to fuck could take him away in a hot second.
“A guy like you would get bored with the real me.”
He drew his brows together. “Bored? Nothing about you is easy or boring.” He kissed her softly. “Stella. I love that you trust me enough to share your real name with me.”
“You probably already knew it.”
“Yes, but you gave it to me, and that means you trust me. At least a little.”
She looked up at the ceiling and groaned. “A lot. That’s the problem.”
“Stella, just spit it out. What’s bothering you?”
“I’m not who you think I am,” she said before she could chicken out.
“You’re not Stella Krane?”
“No! I’m not a girl who says fuck me to a guy. I’m not a girl who blows a guy she just met. I was trying to shed my fear. You know, to break away, lose myself in lust. I was trying to erase the past.”
“Stella, you can’t erase the past. The past happened. Trust me, I’ve tried to erase the past for years, and no matter what, the goddamn past is still there.”
“I know…”
“Do you? Because if you do, then you have to also know that I accept your past. I want to help you move forward from your past. I want to put away the asshole who made your past take over your present.” His face tightened. “I want to kill him, but I won’t because that wouldn’t allow me to be part of your future.”
“My…Logan.” She could hardly believe the things he was saying, but his voice, the way his eyes filled with sincerity, and her heart, were telling her that this was real and that Logan was a good man. An honest man.
She was done being someone she wasn’t. She wanted Logan to know the real Stella Krane. The one she was proud of, the one she hoped could still return. The Stella Krane who wanted to bring him home to meet her mother.
“There’s more. I want you to know how far I am from being the person I used to be. You know that guy in the bar? The one I know you heard me tell to go home and fuck his wife?” She covered her face, her cheeks burning with shame. She hadn’t wanted to say the vile word. She felt his arms circle her waist. “I’m not that girl either.”
“Okay, so you don’t like to talk dirty.” He said this like it was no big deal. As if he’d said, Okay, so you don’t like turkey. “All these emotions are new for both of us, and it scares me shitless, too.”
“It does?” She couldn’t imagine Logan being scared of anything.
“Yes, but I want this.”
“But I’m so messed up.”
Logan pressed his lips to hers again. “Kutcher’s messed up. You’re scared. There’s a difference. I will never hurt you, Stella, and I’ll never let anyone e
lse lay a hand on you ever again.”
She’d forgotten what it felt like to be cared about and to let herself hope. His confidence was arresting and reassuring, and it gave her strength.
“So stop worrying. Clean talk, dirty talk, no talk? It’s not the words you use that give them meaning, Stella. It’s the emotions driving them.”
She felt her cheeks flush. “I like talking dirty with you, but I think I like it when it means more than…you know.”
“Stella Krane, I want more with you. I want everything you’re willing to give.”
Chapter Eleven
LOGAN DROVE HIS father’s old pickup truck down the mountain toward Sweetwater with Stella sitting beside him. He didn’t drive his father’s truck often, but when he did, it made him feel closer to his father. And now he felt closer to his father and Stella, which made Logan feel good. His father would have liked Stella, and he wished he were alive to meet her.
“Do you miss your dad more when you drive his truck?” Stella asked.
“I miss him all the time, but yeah, I do.”
She placed her hand on his thigh and leaned her head on his shoulder.
“What’s it like, knowing you can’t see him again?”
He knew she was asking because of her mom’s cancer, but she hadn’t shared that information with him yet, and as with her name, he wanted her to trust him enough to share those most private parts of her life with him. He felt his throat thickening as he prepared to tell her the truth.
“I wake up every day and there’s this moment when life seems normal. The sun comes up, and I think about work and what I have to do that day. And then my mind always turns to my mom, and when it does, it hits me anew. Dad’s gone.” He paused to gain control of the tears that threatened to fall.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you,” Stella said.
“It’s fine, darlin’.” He kissed the top of her head. “In those first few seconds as I remember, I feel like I’m being sucked under by a big wave. I can’t breathe. I’m not sure which way is up, and my world spins around me. And in the next breath, I stuff it away so I can function again.” He let out a fast, hard breath. “I was close to my dad. He didn’t want me to join the military. He wanted me home. He wanted me safe. But I had something to prove.”
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