Olivia smiled up at him, her cheeks flushed. “Nonsense.”
“Very well,” he said as he handed her into the curricle. A Moment later, he climbed in beside her. He’d planned on driving them to the ocean with hopes that she would bare her ankles and dip her toes into the water. Perhaps he still should. However, he could not stomach the thought of allowing her discomfort even if it stemmed from her own desire to shock him.
William took up the reins and set the carriage into motion. Due to her lack of proper attire, he couldn’t take her into town either. Had that been her plan? To ensure he took her nowhere? How would his little minx react if he did venture toward society? He gave her a wicked grin. “I thought we might enjoy a sweet at the local bakery.”
“I cannot dressed for an outing into town. Let us drive around the estate.”
“You little hypocrite,” he teased. “You have no issue with impropriety so long as you are at home, but in public, you appear the perfect wallflower.” William stopped the curricle so he could fully turn his attention to her. “Do you wish to retrieve your bonnet?”
Olivia peered at him, the copper fleck’s in her eyes sparkling. “Most certainly not.” She notched her chin in defiance. “I shall go as I am.”
As if the devil had whispered in his ear, William turned the carriage toward the road. He should not instigate her as he was, but he could not help himself. He had to know how far she was willing to go. Would she risk her reputation, her parents scorn, all to be rid of him?
He glanced at her as he turned onto the road. The minx sat beside him with a stubborn tilt to her chin. When their eyes met, Olivia shot him a confident smile.
“It’s a lovely day for a ride into town.” She wrapped her fingers around the mass of hair spilling over her shoulder and smoothed her hand down its length.
His chest tightened with longing. How he wished it was his hand skimming the length of her soft coppery waves. William let out a slow breath as he turned his attention back to the road. She may seem relaxed and confident at present, but he’d wager that her tone would change the moment she was faced with any real danger of discovery.
A wager he would soon loose for when they neared a bend in the road, they were greeted with the pounding of horse hooves and creaking of carriage wheels. He snuck a glance in her direction. She did not so much as flinch while his heart nearly pounded free of his chest. Her reputation would be ruined if anyone took notice of her in her current state.
William leaned forward as he drove them around the bend, hoping to shield her as much as possible from prying eyes. Once the other carriage had passed, he drew them to a stop. He’d not allow the little fool to destroy herself.
“What are you doing?” Olivia asked.
He shot her a bewildered look. “I’m turning around.”
“Why?” She angled her chin.
“Because I no longer wish to go to town.” He set the curricle back in motion, turning the team back toward the estate. Perhaps he should not have tested her as he did. Now there was no way of knowing whether or not repercussions would follow. It depended on who occupied the passing carriage and whether or not they’d been paying attention to notice Olivia.
She sat beside him, remaining silent as he drove them back to the house. A few times, he thought to say something to her, but in the end, held his tongue. When they arrived, he drove back to the stables rather than stopping in the drive. Doing so would allow him to walk back with her, affording him a while longer in her company.
William jumped down from the curricle, then went to her side and held up a hand. “Allow me.”
Olivia smiled before placing her hand in his. “That was interesting.” She narrowed her eyes on him. “May I ask what changed your mind?”
“I suspect you already know?” He looped her hand around his elbow, then started toward the house.
A slight smirk pulled at the left corner of her lips. “On the contrary. I wouldn’t presume to know your mind.”
“Wouldn’t you?” He drew them to a stop and pinned her with his stare.
“Of course not.” Olivia smiled, sweetly. “But do tell me what caused our quick return.”
He trailed his gaze over her then captured a silken strand of her hair in his hand as he leaned closer. “I feared for your reputation.”
She stared at him all wide-eyed innocence, then her cheeks colored. “Bloody hell,” she narrowed her eyes on him as her cheeks flamed. “It is—”
William brought his lips to hers, cutting off whatever she’d been trying to say. A gentle press of his flesh against hers. When she did not pull away, he slanted his mouth over hers, taking more. He’d kiss her senseless if she allowed him too. Erase all ideas of unladylike behavior from her mind. Make her forget the game she played with him.
Olivia weakened under his ministrations. She leaned against him, wrapping her arms around his neck, meeting his kiss with her own fervor. Her fingers soon found the hair at the nape of his neck and tangled there as their mouths moved together.
He swept his tongue over the crease of her lips, and she opened for him, her tongue darting out to meet his. Passion engulfed William, heating his blood and coiling in his gut. He deepened the kiss taking all she offered.
Olivia moaned against him, sending a shiver of raw need straight to his groin. For having such a tart mouth, she was proving quite sweet. Perhaps the most delectable woman he’d ever kissed. Another minute of this divine torture and he feared he’d lose control entirely.
Not wanting to take the kiss too far, he pulled back.
William stared down at her, breathless. The copper flecks of her amber eyes sparkled, and her lips were red and swollen. He brushed the hair back from her cheek as he studied her.
Mine.
The single word echoed through his mind.
Somehow, someway, he would win her heart.
Chapter 9
Olivia stared up at the duke, her pulse thrumming. She should not have allowed him to kiss her, but when their lips met, she found herself reluctant to pull away. She’d not meant to sway into him, to pull him close, to give so freely of herself.
Good Heavens, she’d completely surrendered. Heat spread through her with the memory.
More than anything, she’d not meant to enjoy the softness of his mouth against hers—not intended to crave more. What the devil was wrong with her? They could not continue on like this. She would soon find herself lost if they did.
A gentle breeze stirred the hem of her skirt as she stared up at him, knowing she should say something, do something…but what? The intimacy they had shared could not be undone. The tingling of her lips could not be wished away, and she most certainly could not forget the way her body reacted to his touch. The memory would be forever scorched into her brain. Of that, she had no doubt.
“I shall kiss you often once we’re married.” The duke smoothed one long finger down her cheek in a feather-light motion.
“Like hell you will!” Olivia seethed, more angry at herself than him.
Cursing came easy this time. So naturally that Olivia found herself shocked at the ease with which the words had rolled from her tongue. Likely because she was so shaken by the kiss they’d shared. Regardless, she could not allow him any more liberties.
Olivia took a step back, peering at him as she did. “We are not going to be married.”
“No.” He arched one eyebrow, the corner of his mouth tilting up. “The bans are all but read. Our ceremony has been scheduled, and your dress is ready. My aunt and siblings will be arriving soon. The papers have been signed.” He drew nearer. “Madam, I will be taking you to wife.”
Her mouth opened then closed, she was unable to settle on what to say as her mind raced. The duke remained as determined as ever despite her shenanigans. “Surely you do not think me an acceptable role model for your sisters. Why not return to London and court a proper lady? The ton is full of eligible women who’d be more than happy to wed a duke.”
“Yo
u are a proper lady.”
“I ride astride, cuss, and show my ankles.” She stared at him in disbelief. “My behavior is anything but proper.”
He reached for her hand, but she pulled it back. Returning his arm to his side, he said, “Do you think I haven’t noticed that your ill manors are reserved only for me?”
Her eyes rounded as she studied him. The cad had her all figured out. What was she to do now? Argue? Prove him wrong and throw her reputation out the nearest window?
Mother would have an episode, and Father would have Olivia’s hide. She simply could not disgrace her family or herself in such a way. Then what?
“In truth, I rather enjoy your behavior. My own secret version of the wallflower everyone else knows.” He gave a rakish smile. “My sister could stand to learn a great deal from you. They would benefit from learning to control their own actions in such a way.”
“You wish for them to be hoydens?” Olivia stared at him, her back stiff and chin notched defiantly.
He laughed. “They already are. What I wish for, is them to learn how to hide that side of their nature,” he placed the back of his fingers beneath her chin and met her gaze, “You, my dear, are an expert. Perfectly suited to teaching them.”
Olivia shook her head, desperation driving her while impending doom churned in her gut. “No, you’re wrong. You must call off. We cannot marry.”
His blue eyes darkened as the look he gave her turned hard. The duke pressed his lips together, the muscle in his jaw ticking.
A shiver of foreboding raced through Olivia. Even before he spoke, she knew he would not honor her request.
The duke took her chin between his thumb and forefinger, then said in a confident tone, “You will marry me.”
Olivia’s throat tightened, and she pulled free of his grasp as tears welled in her eyes. “Why?”
“Because you have been promised to me.”
She averted her gaze to a nearby bush and blinked back the tears. “What of love?” Her voice shook, but she had to ask.
“Perhaps it will come in time.” He stepped up behind her but did not touch her. Only leaned close enough for his breath to fan her ear as he added, “For now, we have passion.”
Olivia pressed her eyes together and released a breath. What use was passion without love? What kind of life would she have with him? Would he come to her at night then ignore her by day?
She could not go through with the wedding. Could not allow herself to be used and discarded.
Mustering the last bits of her courage, she said, “I pray you reconsider.”
“Your time would be better spent preparing for our marriage.”
“Perhaps, but nonetheless,” she said before gathering her remaining dignity and strolling toward the house. There was nothing left for her to say, and she did not wish to make a cake of herself by crying in front of him.
The first tears crested her eyes and rolled down her cheeks as she raced up the staircase toward her bedchamber. She was well and truly stuck unless she did something drastic. But what could she do? Mother and Father would never permit her to beg off, and the duke had been clear on his stance. The wedding would take place whether or not she wished for it.
She sat on the edge of her bed and sobbed. Olivia could not say how much time had past before her tears ran dry, but eventually, they did. She dabbed at her cheeks and under her eyes with a handkerchief. Turning into a watering pot would only serve to make the situation worse. She had to pull herself together.
Perhaps it was time for her to accept her fate. Maybe marriage to the duke would prove tolerable. She did enjoy his company and could not deny the passion between them. More than that, they had become friends of sorts.
If only he loved her…
She laid back on her bed and stared at the gilded ceiling. There had been a time in her life that she’d desperately wanted to marry and have her own family. Back then she’d had fanciful ideas of love. A handsome gentleman would sweep her away to Gretna Green and make her his. They would live happily ever after, and the duke would be a long-ago memory.
Once that dream faded she became determined to live an independent life. Olivia would become a spinster, eventually gain access to her dowery, and live out her life on her own terms.
Never had she imagined a life with him—not a happy one. It had long been her goal to escape the betrothal. What a cruel joke that she should find herself drawn to him now. More than that, she was in great danger of giving him her heart. If they married, she would no doubt give him everything—all of her—then suffer for it.
She’d love him while he treated her as property—staff, a governess of sorts to his sisters. The very thought sent a pain through her heart. Perhaps she already loved him?
Olivia rolled over and buried her face in the pillow.
In love with a man who did not have the ability to return her feelings… What a fool she’d become. If the situation were not so dire, she’d laugh at herself for the mess she’d made of it.
As it were… well, tomorrow would come whether or not she wished for it. She could only hope that a new day would bring clarity.
Yes, she would figure something out tomorrow. Make a decision—either marry the duke and make the best of whatever future he offered, or find a way to end their betrothal.
Chapter 10
For the next two days, Olivia awoke every bit as shaken by the kiss and determined to make a choice as she had been when she’d fled from the duke. This torture had to end, and it would do so today. Rather than joining her parents and the duke for the usual morning meal, she had a tray sent up to her room. She feigned a headache, opting to spend the day alone in her room. She had no wish to see the duke until she’d decided on her future.
Of that, Olivia was sure. She would be the one to decide whether or not they married. She pushed eggs around on her china plate. The last thing she wanted was marriage without love. The thought kept circling her mind making it impossible to ignore.
Equally impossible to ignore was the knowledge that if she gave the duke her body, there would be no taking back her heart. Nausea settled in, causing her belly to roll, and she pushed the china plate away.
By early afternoon, Olivia feared she would go mad if she stayed locked in her room dwelling on the same thought. The time to act had come, and she was almost sure that becoming the duke’s wife would not be her course.
Her parents remained an obstacle for they would likely disown her. There would be no chance of Father turning her dowry over, so she’d have to make a future for herself without finances.
Olivia strolled across her room to the large floor to ceiling window. Pushing the frothy pink curtain aside, she leaned in and rested her forehead against the cold glass. When night fell, she would sneak away. Go to Juliet or Emma’s for the night, or a few days, until she figured out where to settle and how to do so on her own.
There was a bit of pin money in her chest. Olivia stepped back and let the curtain fall into place. Retrieving a valise, she sat it on her bed then went to collect the pin money she’d saved. Olivia lifted a velvet pouch from the small oak chest on her bedside table. The coins jingled as she opened it to peer inside. Not a great deal of money, but surely enough to see her through for a month or so.
Perhaps she could go to a small town on the other side of England and seek a position as a governess or companion. Assuming she found a fair-minded employer, doing so would allow her time to herself during which she could enjoy her own pursuits. Her spirits soared at the idea. Olivia could be quite happy living such a life.
The velvet bag landed in her valise with a chime of clanking coins before she added a couple of gowns, some underthings, and a few hair ribbons. She would not require too many fancy things, but for good measure added a ball gown. As a final thought, she dumped her jewelry box into the valise. Should the time come that her coin ran dry, the jewelry could be sold to sustain her for a while longer.
Satisfied, Olivia closed the valis
e then went to her desk and wrote two identical letters.
My dearest friends,
I am sending this exact note along to each of you as I have no time to spare. The duke refuses to call off the wedding, and I cannot go through with it. Emma, I know what you are thinking and believe me, I considered doing that very thing. In the end, I concluded that a marriage of convenience would do naught other than break my heart. I need to seek refuge with one of you until I can settle on a permanent destination. Your parents, siblings, and staff cannot know of my presence for I have no wish to be caught.
All of my gratitude and love,
O
Satisfied with what she’d written, she sealed the parchment, hid her valise, and rang for a footman. She’d have one letter delivered to each of her friends and see which could accommodate her. Pray, let one of them be capable of the task.
If neither of them was able to aid her, what would she do?
Perhaps take a horse and ride for the next town? Maybe hide somewhere on her own estate until a safe escape plan came to mind? She could book passage on the mail coach that comes through town. Ideas popped in and out of her mind in rapid succession. With so many options, she would surely find her way to freedom.
Olivia returned to her desk and placed a fresh piece of parchment on its surface. She may disagree with her parents’ stance, but she still loved them. There would be no way to avoid hurting them, but she could try to keep them from worrying overmuch. She dipped her quill into the inkwell and began…
Father, Mother,
Forgive me for what I have done, but I saw no other option. I could not sentence myself to a life without love. Could not abandon my own dreams and ambitions for a title. Do not worry over me, I assure you, I am perfectly well and safe.
I hope that in time you will forgive me,
Olivia
She sighed, then pushed the chair back and stood. Her parents would be furious when they discovered her absence. Mother would be beside herself and Father… He would be angry—furious before his heartache set in. It pained Olivia to put them through the hurt and anger. For a heartbeat, she considered burning the letter and forgoing her plan, but the urge passed as quickly as it had struck.
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