Every year, the Simmons family went on a nonnegotiable two-week family vacation in the fall. Every family member would pick a place they wanted to visit, and we'd vote on it. RJ usually picked Japan, and as a result, it's the only country we've been to three times. I didn't usually care. I was just excited to go on vacation, although it was my idea to go to Vegas. I knew how much Kimberly missed Adam, and we've never been to Barbados. So, easy enough.
* * *
The morning meeting was uneventful except for when Smith welcomed me back by calling me Mr. Mom.
Susan Charing called to set up a meeting to discuss CJ's case and get DNA tests done. She offered to have them done at the office, which I was grateful for, and she wouldn't discuss payment, which made me nervous.
Dev, back from his trip to India, clapped me hard on my shoulder, making me wince in pain. “Hey, Cole. Didn’t think you’d be here today.” Upon seeing my expression, he added, “What’s up with your shoulder?”
"Nothing. I might have pulled something at the gym," I lied. I wasn't going to tell him that my entire back was covered in welts, scratches, and a few bites.
“So, I heard back from my friends. The ones I gave your mother’s reports to.”
He referred to Crystal as my mother, and I didn't bother to correct him. "So…"
"Well, your mum definitely died from injuries related to the crash. And there was definitely someone else driving that car." He put his hands on his knees and rose to his feet. "And my guy at the NYPD said something was off about the investigation. Couldn't put his finger on it, but everyone he talked to in Missouri was really dodgy about details. He couldn't push too hard because he wasn't really working the case, but…odd, you know. Anyway, ring the detective before too much time passes." He clapped my shoulder again, making me wince and swear. "Shite. Sorry, mate."
I pulled Detective Tan's card out of my desk drawer and was just about to dial when I got a text from Lisa. She'd sent me a video of CJ dancing to Lil Nas X's "Old Town Road," wearing only a diaper and toy cowboy hat. After watching it about ten times, I sent it to Mom and Kimberly. I slipped Detective Tan's card back in my drawer, deciding that it could wait a little longer.
* * *
It was nine o'clock when I got home, and Lisa was sitting on the couch with her hair in a giant messy bun on top of her head, wearing her own clothes and reading on a tablet. I half hoped she'd still be wearing my shirt, but that didn't make any sense.
“Hey, welcome home.” She grinned and set her tablet down to give me her full attention. It took every ounce of energy I had left—and it wasn’t much—to keep myself from crawling onto the couch and laying my head in her lap, so she could run her fingers through my hair.
“Hey, neighbor.” I kicked off my shoes and threw down my backpack.
"How was your day?" She had walked into the kitchen. "I'm not sure if you ate, but we have leftovers. I could warm them up before I go."
“Leftovers?”
“Yeah, I made roasted chicken and vegetables.”
“CJ ate that?”
"Yeah." She nodded. "The carrots were a big hit."
“Is he supposed to be eating that?”
"What do you mean?" Her tone became serious, and it made me nervous.
"Nothing, I mean, I've been giving him this age-appropriate baby food that’s supposed to be less of a choking hazard, more suited to his digestive system…" I trailed off at her expression. She'd crossed her arms, which was clearly a defensive stance, but she was smiling, which made me nervous.
"Cole, are you suggesting that I would feed CJ something dangerous, or that would make him sick?"
"No, not intentionally," I said. Lisa's eyebrows shot up her forehead before she began walking around the kitchen. "Hey, I only mean…" She pulled something out of the cabinet. "…things are really…" I knew I was rambling and probably wasn't making any sense, but I was too curious about what she was doing. "…I would feel more comfortable if…" I watched her open and close the silverware drawer. "…if this arrangement is going to work…" I heard a pop. "…as CJ's legal guardian I need to be— Argh!"
Lisa had put a spoonful of something in my mouth that tasted like she'd scooped it out of CJ's diaper. I ran to the sink, spit it out and used the sprayer to rinse the rest from my mouth, terrified to swallow any of it.
"What the fuck was that?" I turned to look at her. My face and the front of my suit were soaked. She'd tucked her lips between her teeth, trying to hold back a laugh, and her eyes were sparkling. She held up a small glass jar.
"Age-appropriate carrots," she said before bursting out laughing.
I snatched the jar from her hand. There was an illustration of a baby hugging the planet Earth, and the label definitely said carrots, but they didn't taste like any carrots I'd ever eaten.
"Hungry?" she asked and offered me the spoon. I narrowed my eyes at her and threw the jar of baby food in the garbage. Then I grabbed a folded paper grocery bag from under the sink and grabbed every jar that was left, emptying the cabinet and leaving the bag by the door, so I wouldn't forget to take it to the food pantry in the morning.
“You ready to look at the apartment?” I asked, still annoyed, tasting “carrots,” and having learned my lesson about questioning Lisa’s childrearing methods. She flashed me a smug grin and nodded.
"But first, I have something for you." She pulled a small stack of papers out of CJ's diaper bag. "One of my dad's associates has a friend in New York who drew this up for me—for us. It's boilerplate, but basically, it states the salary we agreed on and terms of employment. I'd like two days off a week; Saturday and Sunday, unless previously agreed upon, four weeks’ paid vacation and two weeks of personal days. You don't have to worry about health benefits." She looked up at me, and when I didn't respond, she said, "It's an employment contract. I just thought it would be the responsible thing to do." She pushed the papers towards me. "Cole?"
“Yeah.” I blinked and refocused. An employment contract. The last flicker of hope I was carrying that Lisa would change her mind about us sputtered and died. “Yeah, sure, of course.” I slid one copy closer, took a pen out of my suit jacket, initialed every page, and signed the last one, while Lisa did the same to the other copy. Then we switched.
“Are you sure you don’t want to read it? Maybe negotiate?”
"Whatever you're asking for, you deserve it."
“Should we have gotten it notarized?” she asked.
“I don't think that's necessary, but we can if you want.”
Lisa shook her head and looked down at the contracts. “Thank you.” She glanced up and gave me a smile that failed to light up her eyes.
“Let’s go look at the apartment.”
17
lisa
"So, you've been working for Cole for a week, and you are still living next door? How bad was the apartment?" Sasha sliced into her steak while waiting for me to respond, hanging on my every word.
“It was perfect, but I can’t live there.”
“Why not?”
"Sasha, he just lost his mom, and he'd decorated that apartment for her to live in… He just looked so sad. And it would feel like living in a shrine to someone else."
"So, what's your plan?"
"Well, I told him I needed time. Now that I've had a few days, I think I have a solution. There's a huge bedroom connected to the nursery, separated by a bathroom. It's on the other side of the house."
"So, your plan is to become roommates with this man you are ridiculously attracted to, have had amazing sex with, but can't date because you are both hot messes, and now you're his employee." She raised a perfectly arched, skeptical eyebrow.
"Hear me out." I had a sudden flash of memory of Cole saying these words to me while he had me pinned under his massive frame on the couch right before he carried me upstairs to his bedroom. I pushed the thought away. "I have almost no furniture. It could all fit in that room. Cole is gone at least twelve hours a day. I hardly ever see him
, and I'd have more access to the baby. It actually makes perfect sense." I picked up my water glass and brought it to my lips.
“If you say so.” She dipped a piece of steak in the yolk from her egg, making me wrinkle my nose. “Tell me about his dick.”
I snorted and almost choked on my water. “I am a debutante and a Southern lady. I would never discuss such things.”
Sasha held up a breadstick and raised her eyebrows. I took the breadstick from her hands and broke it in half. She scrunched up her face. Then I took another breadstick and lined it up with the broken one. Her face lit up.
“Nice.” She nodded. “And you let him put that in your ass?”
“Jesus Christ, Sasha!” I looked around the restaurant. No one seemed to notice. “Yes,” I whispered. “I let him put his giant breadstick in my ass.”
“I’m just learning so much about you.” She laughed.
"My ex liked it, but it wasn't my favorite thing. Just like oral. It was just expected of me every year, but I never enjoyed it."
“And with Cole?”
“It’s amazing.” A wide grin spread across my face, but I quickly recovered. “I mean, it was amazing. He was so…attentive. It's like he wanted me to enjoy it just as much as he did. It's like he got pleasure from making me feel pleasure. And he was so appreciative. There were no expectations just…two people enjoying each other. I've never experienced anything like it."
“Yes. It’s almost like you’re a person deserving of happiness and orgasms and not a collection of warm holes.” She gave me a sarcastic smile. “It also sounds like he uses his hands a lot. That’s very important.”
“He does use his hands a lot.” I used my fork to spear a cherry tomato from her uneaten salad and popped it into my mouth.
“And you’re giving that up?” She raised her eyebrows.
"Yes. It's for the best. We had one perfect night, and we're quitting while we're ahead."
“Fine.” She almost sounded bored.
“How’s work?”
“Work is work. Theresa didn’t get the part but is getting the extra shifts she wanted because there was a new job opening.” She gave me a pointed look before moving on. “However, I don’t think she’ll be working at Mama’s much longer.”
“Why not?”
"Somehow"—she shrugged and sipped her mimosa—"everyone found out what she did, and let's just say, she's not very popular."
My eyebrows shot up my forehead. “Really?”
"Think about it. At least half of the servers are parents imagining what would happen if the person that they were paying to watch their kids pulled some shit like that. The other half of them are pissed that you lost your job because they like you more than they like her… I'm in the second half. There's also a fair amount of overlap."
“Was Mike really pissed?” I asked. I hoped Mike didn’t take his anger at me out on any of the other employees.
“Mike has actually been pretty mellow since you left.” She leaned back in her chair with a sly grin before taking another sip of her mimosa.
“What did you do?” I leaned forward.
"Nothing. I just told my boss the truth." She shrugged again. I rolled my eyes and glared at her. "I told him that you called to take the day off from work because you had a family emergency when you heard his outburst. Then you were so distraught that you quit and that you were now working with a lawyer." She polished off her mimosa and smiled.
“Sasha, I’m working for a lawyer…as his nanny.”
“Isn’t that what I said?” She grinned. “I can’t help what conclusions Mike might draw, but he’s been really nice the last couple of days. And he asked how you were doing.”
“You are the worst.” I grinned at her.
“Or—counterpoint—am I the best?”
* * *
My first week working for Cole was awkward, to say the least, but it felt like I was where I was supposed to be. I let myself in every morning and made coffee while I waited for Cole to come downstairs. We made small talk about CJ while trying to avoid accidentally touching each other. On Tuesday, our fingertips brushed when I was handing him his travel mug, and I almost came apart. The same day, a jogging stroller was delivered, and when I mentioned it to Cole, all he said was, "Oh, good." During the day, I'd send him pictures and videos of CJ, and he'd always reply with a funny gif.
My days with CJ were fun, exhausting, and way too short. We spent most of our time at the park, but we also went to the Central Park Zoo, the Museum of Natural History, and a bunch of other kid-friendly destinations. We danced, sang songs, and took naps.
After a dry spell of a month and a half—I still hadn't heard anything about the last audition I went on—my agency called. They wanted to send me on two auditions, but I turned them down and didn't mention them to Cole.
When he came home at night, my new boss was always exhausted. After looking around for CJ and realizing I'd already put him to bed, he'd thank me. We'd make small talk and avoid touching each other for a few minutes. Then I'd say I had to go and offer to reheat dinner, but he'd refuse. When I came back in the morning, the leftovers were always gone.
* * *
I was walking home—to my apartment at Kimberly's—from running after brunch with Sasha when I saw Cole and CJ leaving the brownstone.
"Hey, still my neighbor." He grinned at me and CJ leaned away from him, stretching his arms towards me and opening and closing his fists.
"Hi, cutie." I tickled CJ's belly as he wriggled in my arms while ignoring Cole's sarcasm. Finally, I looked into the eyes of the bigger version of the person trying to pick my nose. "Kimberly said I had until the end of the month. What's the rush?"
“No rush.” He reached up to rub the back of his neck. He was nervous. “Is something wrong with the apartment? You can change anything you want.”
"Well, since you asked. I'm not sure if I want to live in the apartment."
“Okay, well I can’t really afford to—”
"I mean, I was thinking, if it's okay with you… What if I moved into the room that's connected with CJ's room? It's bigger than my bedroom now, and I don't have a lot of stuff. I'd have my own bathroom. It's closer to this guy." I bounced CJ and kissed his belly.
Cole looked at me with his bottom lip tucked between his teeth and deep in thought. “Yeah.” He gave a little head nod. “I think that would be a great idea. I’d just have to clean all my stuff out.”
“What’s in there?”
“Mostly exercise equipment: weights and a treadmill.” He shrugged.
"So, that's where the magic happens." I laughed. I wondered how Cole was in such great shape. His body was beautiful, and he picked me up like I weighed nothing. I was in the middle of a particularly vivid flashback when I heard Cole say my name.
“You okay?”
“I’m fine.” I kissed the side of CJ’s head.
"You sure? You were saying something about magic, and then you just kind of drifted off." His grin told me he knew exactly where my thoughts had wandered.
"So, where are you two headed without a stroller?" I asked to change the subject.
“Family meeting.” He jerked his head at his parents’ brownstone on the corner. “Time to vote on the family vacation destination.”
“Wow. I haven’t been to a family meeting in years.”
“Your family has meetings too?”
"Well, there are seven of us, so it's a very efficient way of conveying information, but we never got to choose our family vacations. It was either Puerto Rico or Disney World."
"So, where would you go if you could pick anywhere in the world to go on vacation?"
"Puerto Rico," I answered without thinking. He furrowed his brow. "Yes, I've been there dozens of times, but it's the most beautiful place in the world. I haven't been in a few years, and my grandmother is getting older." I had to pause because thinking about Abuelita made me teary. I hadn't been to PR to see her in at least three years. "She makes the best ch
icken soup you've ever had. The beaches are beautiful, and the water is so blue. The people are amazing. The music is the best." I looked up to see Cole gazing at me with a lazy, half-smile.
“Sounds amazing.”
“It is.”
18
cole
"Hey, everybody! We're here." I kicked my parents’ door closed with my foot and kicked off my shoes in the foyer.
“There’s my little stink-a-butt baby.” Mom grabbed CJ and started planting kisses all over his face.
"Oh my God! He looks just like Cole as a baby!" Aunt Patrice had joined my mother, and they crowded CJ, making him giggle.
“Didn’t I tell you?” my mom said.
"Is CJ here?" Kimberly emerged from the kitchen, holding her phone to her ear. "Babe, they just got here, so we're voting now. I'll call you later. I love you." She took CJ from my mom, and he began squeezing her cheeks.
"Hey, son." Dad clapped me on the shoulder, chuckling.
“Dad?” I said in feigned shock. “You can see me?”
“You better get used to it.” He chuckled again.
“Hey, handsome,” Aunt Patrice wrapped her arms around my shoulder and gave me a kiss on the cheek. “How are you?”
“I’m good, Auntie,” I replied. “Tired, but good.” I smiled. “I see you’re growing your hair out.” My aunt was usually bald making her look like a Dora Milaje warrior from Black Panther, but today she had a short afro.
“I’m trying something new.” She shrugged as we made our way to the couch.
Kimberly and pint-sized Usain Bolt were engaged in a low-speed chase around the sitting room when Dad clapped his hands.
"All right, gang. Let's get this party started," he bellowed, and we all took seats around the room. Kimberly sat and Aunt Patrice took the opportunity to pull CJ into her lap, where he promptly began to play with one of her large hoop earrings. He loved all of this attention.
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