by D. L. Savage
“You’re in pretty great shape yourself,” I laughed. “I feel so light and limber.”
“It’s so weird having a thing down there,” she added, chuckling as she nodded towards her speedo. “I guess that must be similar for you now having boobs!”
“Yeah, it is uh pretty odd,” I murmured, hoping I wasn’t blushing, hoping it wasn’t written all over my damn face how much fun I’d been having earlier on with my brand new tits.
“Say, Allie,” I added, as a new embarrassing thought occurred to me, “this isn’t being like recorded is it? What we’ve been doing in here?”
“No!” she laughed. “Even though the landscape has been generated, the actual simulation itself is just occurring in our minds. It’s kind of hard to explain, but yeah, even though we’ve got the technology to simulate this experience we’re having right now, we’re still a long way off from being able to record it. It would be like being able to record your dreams.”
“Cool,” I said, relieved that my little episode by the palm trees would be my little secret.
“Oh and Steven,” Allie added, that strange expression flashing across her face again, “about what happened earlier ...”
But before she could continue: FLASH!
I felt my mind once again sucked into that blank white void, then – BOOM – dropped back into my own body, my eyes flashing open, my mouth gasping, my wrists and ankles straining for a moment against the straps of the seat, before I came to my senses.
8
There was a definite awkwardness afterwards, as we both filled out our questionnaires and had our readings taken by Michael and I wondered if Allie was going to continue saying whatever it was she’d started to say on the beach, just before the simulation had ended.
Again, the session had been scheduled so that we had some free time afterwards, to rest and recuperate, and I’d been hoping that maybe we could hang out for a little that afternoon. After all, we still hadn’t done any best friend stuff – catching up, grabbing drinks, dinner somewhere – but I could tell Allie was still feeling weird about everything as we strolled out of the lab and into the bright sunlit sidewalk beyond.
“Hey, is everything okay?” I said, when I finally couldn’t take the growing silence any longer.
“I don’t know,” she replied, not quite meeting my eye, causing a weird pang of worry to go through me.
Had she somehow found out what I’d done inside her body?
“Listen,” she continued. “There’s something I think I should tell you ...”
I felt my nerves twisting up even more and I held my breath, waiting for her to say it, whatever the fuck it was. But the moment was suddenly shattered by the beeping of a car horn, and I looked over to see the most ridiculous bright red sports car, the top down and none other than Greg, Allie’s husband, behind the wheel.
“Oh shit, I forgot, Greg’s taking me out for lunch,” she said, then paused before adding, “You wanna come?”
But I could tell by the way she said it, that awkwardness growing even stronger between us now, that she didn’t actually want me to; she was just being her usual polite self.
“Nah, I’m pretty tired actually,” I lied. “Think I might go back to my room for a nap.”
I walked her over to the car, feeling a sharp sting of envy as I set eyes on Greg – his stupid chiseled jaw and slick jet black hair, his obviously expensive clothes, and the gold wedding band on his finger.
“Hey, Steve,” he said as he saw me. “How’s it going?”
I knew he didn’t like me, but I’d never figured out if he called me Steve (nobody called me that) just because he suspected it pissed me off (it did) or simply because he was an idiot that never paid attention to anything. Either way, it just made me hate him even more.
“Yeah, pretty good,” I mumbled, watching as Allie climbed into the other side of the car, then leant in and gave him a kiss on the cheek, murmuring something to him, before turning and giving me a weird, awkward smile and a wave.
Then the car pulled away from the curb, and I was left wondering what the fuck was going on.
I spent the afternoon and evening in a total funk, unsure what the hell to do with myself. I knew I should probably go out – have some fun in the city. After all, I was staying in an awesome hotel and I had the whole week off work, right? But instead of making the most of my time, instead I just hung out in my room, half the time lost in memories of the amazing time I’d had in Allie’s body, the other half worrying that something weird was going on between us – that she was freaked out about something. But what?
The answer to that question didn’t come until the early hours of the morning, when I was woken from a light sleep by my cellphone going off.
“Hello?” I murmured, fumbling the phone to my ear, still half asleep.
“I’m sorry if I woke you,” Allie’s voice said on the other end of the line. “I know it’s late but is it okay if we talk?”
She was talking in a whisper, and I suspected that she’d snuck out of bed to make this call somewhere else in her apartment.
Suddenly I was wide awake, my heart beating hard in my chest as I croaked, “Uh, sure,” holding my breath as I waited for whatever was coming next.
“I’ve got something I need to tell you, Steven,” she said, her voice sounding nervous, even apologetic.
“Okay ...” I said hesitantly.
“I did something in your body, after the weird moment between us on the beach? Well, I swam out into the water and ... I … I masturbated.”
I felt such a huge rush of relief when she said it, and I even laughed.
“Steven, this isn’t funny,” she hissed. “This is serious.”
“I know,” I continued, “but Allie, I did the exact same thing in your body too, while you were out swimming!”
There was a long pause on the other end of the line, and then she said it.
“That settles it.”
“Settles what?” I asked, puzzled.
“We need to stop the experiment now.”
“What?” I spluttered, unable to believe my ears. “But Allie, we were just getting started!”
“No, Steven,” she said seriously. “I’ve made up my mind. It’s too dangerous. For so many reasons. I’ve found my head getting so messed up from just those two sessions, and I’m scared what might happen if we continue. Think about it. It could ruin our friendship forever. And my marriage is at stake. It was just supposed to be an experiment, but its quickly turning into something else.”
“So what if it is?” I said weakly, the closest I’d ever come to admitting my true feelings about her.
“Come on, Steven,” she sighed. “You must know too what would happen if we did it again? Things would just get even more heated. You said yourself that you masturbated. I did too. The whole process, it’s just too addictive – too pleasurable. We should never have taken part in it.”
“But your research,” I said, trying one last ditch attempt to convince her.
“Don’t worry,” she said quietly, “I’m carrying on the research, but from now on I am not taking part in the test itself. And neither are you. I’m so sorry, I feel like I’ve wasted your time, bringing you all the way up here and then stopping it like this after just a couple of sessions ...”
“So what happens now?” I murmured, my hopes sinking. “Do you still wanna hang our or ...”
“Actually?” she said, her voice now cold in a way I’d never heard before, as she said the one thing I never wanted to hear her say, “I don’t think we should see each other for a while.”
There was the longest pause, as I just sat reeling, my head spinning, my heart pounding, a nauseous feeling sweeping over me.
“Goodbye, Steven,” she said sadly.
“Goodbye,” I replied.
And then she hung up the phone.
9
And just like that, it felt like my whole world had ended. I didn’t sleep at all that night, just lay on my
bed, mind reeling, more depressed and heartbroken than I’d ever been in my life.
I still had three more days before my flight back, and I just spent them in my room, only slinking out occasionally for crappy takeout food that I could hardly stomach anyway, my body still wracked with a twisted-up nauseous feeling that I’d fucked things up for good with Allie.
It had happened – not the way I’d imagined it, but worse. The thing I’d been dreading all my life. She’d spurned me.
I even thought about killing myself that week, lying alone on my bed, the flat screen TV blaring out inane chatter into the huge hotel room. Thought about throwing myself off a fucking bridge. But I was too depressed to even move, let alone google a suitable suicide spot, and in the end I just let the days and nights drift by, until it was time to fly home again.
Weeks turned into months, summer turned into Fall, and still no word from Allie. She’d even deleted her Facebook, so I couldn’t find out how she was doing or check in on her from a distance.
I stopped going to the gym, stopped caring what I ate, just slid into a deep, low-level depression that hung around me like a cloud, only doing the bare minimum at work, hardly interacting with my co-workers, knowing that if I kept on down this track it wouldn’t be long until I lost my job, too, but at the same time totally powerless to make any real changes to my behavior.
What was the fucking point?
I’d lost everything. And what was worse, I’d experienced something so magical, so utterly unique and amazing – those few hours I’d spent in Allie’s body – that even just being me again felt itself like some kind of punishment.
Again, my thoughts turned towards ending it; my own body just a cruel reminder of how pathetic and shitty I was. But one night, as I was lying on my bed, my cell started ringing, and when I checked the screen I saw a name I never thought I’d see again.
Allie.
I reached out with a shaking hand, taking a long deep breath before I answered.
“Hello?”
“Steven.” Her voice sounded shaky, even more nervous than I felt right now. “Are you at home?”
“Yeah, how come?” I asked.
“I’m at O’Hare. I flew in. I need to see you. Can I come to your place?”
“Sure,” I said, my heart rushing, my head spinning.
“Great, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
She hung up the call and after a moment’s stunned pause, I sprung into action. I knew that a cab from the airport would take at least half an hour to get to my place, so I set about tidying my crummy apartment as much as I was able, then jumped in the shower, not wanting her to see me in my current state.
“It’s really good to see you again,” Allie said with a sad smile, standing on my doorstep, forty minutes or so later.
And I felt the exact same way. She looked just as pretty as ever, dressed in a simple black winter coat, her hair tied up in a ponytail, but her eyes looked red and puffy, like she’d been crying.
“Hey, everything okay?” I said, still unsure whether or not I should hug her.
“Can I come in,” she said quietly.
“Of course,” I said, standing aside to let her pass.
She seemed to be wheeling a huge suitcase with her, and I wondered if she was planning on staying at mine – I only had one bed, but I was more than happy to sleep on the couch if it meant I could hang out with her again.
“Oh Steven,” she sighed, dumping her case then turning and hugging me tight. “I’m so sorry about everything, I should never have cut you out like that.”
I hugged her, and all of a sudden she was crumpling in my arms, sobbing her heart out.
I led her over to the couch, where she continued crying for a while, and I waited patiently, still wondering what the hell was going on.
“I’ve broken up with Greg,” she said, finally sniffing back the tears and wiping at her face.
“What?” I gasped.
“Don’t worry,” she sighed. “It’s nothing to do with what happened between us, during the simulation. The bastard had been cheating on me. For months! I’ve already started divorce proceedings.”
“Oh Allie,” I said, feeling terrible that I’d known nothing about this, how mush she must have been hurting all this time, while I’d been moping about feeling sorry for myself. “I had no idea. You should have called me.”
“That’s the thing,” she said, looking at me with a weird expression. “I wanted to, but after what happened between us, on the beach? I don’t know. I just needed some time to clear my head. I guess if I’m honest, that had already put a strain on my relationship with Greg, even before I found out he was such a bastard. I couldn’t stop thinking about the swap – couldn’t get it out of my mind. It just felt so ... so good.”
It was such a rush, hearing her give voice to the exact same feelings that I’d been having about our swap.
“Oh my god,” I gasped, “me too! I’ve never been able to stop thinking about it either. It was amazing.”
“It was, wasn’t it?” she smiled, turning to face me now, her pretty brown eyes sparkling brightly. “I want to do it again, Steven. I want to swap with you again.”
The way she said it left no doubt in my mind what she meant, and I felt a kind of lightheaded euphoria swoop over me – the girl of my dreams was here, and she actually wanted to swap bodies with me again!
“But how?” I sighed. “Can we really go back to the lab again? Wouldn’t you get in trouble?”
“We don’t have to go back to the lab at all,” she smiled mysteriously, pushing herself up from the couch and moving to her suitcase, wheeling it over to the couch and unlocking the clasps, opening it up to reveal not clothes but a whole bunch of boxes, wires and what looked like a desktop computer inside.
“Is that what I think it is?” I whispered, my voice shaking with excitement.
Allie nodded.
“We’d already been developing a portable prototype,” she grinned. “If you can really call all this junk portable ...”
I laughed, but already the air felt charging with a crazy excitement.
“So what do you say, Steven?” she said quietly, her own voice now trembling with the exact same excitement I was feeling right now. “Shall we take another trip?”
10
FLASH!
I was there again, inside Allie’s body, and her in mine. Only this time, we weren’t in a vast empty plane or on a beach. We were in a bedroom; the most luxurious bedroom I’d ever seen, a place that made my five-star hotel room look like a total dump.
It was furnished in a soft purple pink, with a huge inviting looking bed, and walls that seemed to be semi-mirrored too – enough to pick out your reflection if you were looking for it, like some kind of opaque Perspex – the lighting soft and flattering.
I looked down at my delicate, feminine body, realizing I was dressed in silky white lingerie: stockings, a suspender belt, a cute little bra and a matching white g-string. I could feel the tiny strip of fabric resting gently between my butt cheeks, and I smiled to myself, always having had a slight fascination with what it might feel like to wear women’s underwear.
And there was Allie, standing in front of me, in my body, her eyes hungry with desire. The only clothing she was wearing was a simply pair of black briefs and a single glance between her legs told me she was just as turned on right now as I was.
My body looked okay, but I felt a flash of annoyance that I’d not kept up my gym regime, and I said, “Sorry my body isn’t in quite as good shape as it was,” with an apologetic smile, once again hearing the soft feminine tones of my voice as I spoke.
“I don’t care,” Allie replied, taking a step towards me, her voice now low and taut with lust. “Just come here and kiss me.”
I moved towards her, overcome with a kind of desire I’d never known. As her hands reached out to pull me closer, our lips touching finally, I closed my eyes, shivering from the sensations that were sweeping through me.<
br />
Because everything felt so different yet so right. I was kissing myself after all. As her hands moved into my hair, I reached out, running my fingers up the sides of my own body, touching skin that felt familiar yet totally new.
And quickly the kiss became more passionate, Allie’s hands moving to cup my tender aching breasts, gently thumbing my nipples through the fabric of my bra in a way that made me moan into her mouth, while my own hand had moved between her legs, stroking her cock – my cock – through her briefs.
It only occurred to me in that moment that what I was doing might have been called gay. I was touching a guy after all. But the guy was me, a body I knew so damn well, and what’s more I simply didn’t care – in that moment I felt truly feminine, so slender and small compared to Allie in that male body, submitting to the experience totally, letting her take the lead.
Soon, my hand had slipped right inside her briefs, my slender fingers curling around her hard pulsing cock, stroking it gently, even letting my thumb run back and forth against the sensitive patch of skin just below her cock head that I knew would drive her wild. And sure enough, she groaned, plunging her tongue even deeper into my mouth, her own hand now moving between my legs too, her fingers finding my clit straight away, applying a soft tender pressure to it in a way that had my knees buckling instantly, a charge of the most delicious ecstasy shooting straight through me.
As her fingers worked my pussy like that, I felt the wetness seeping out of me, my breath becoming ragged and my fingers letting go of her cock as she brought me closer and closer to the edge, my hips starting to buck involuntarily, my body shuddering.
I threw my arms around her broad shoulders, a soft broken moan spilling from my lips as – a moment later – I began to come, my aching pussy clenching and spasming as it started to squirt all over her fingers.