by Tegan Maher
Ray knocked.
No one answered. I swiveled my ears toward the door to see if my sensitive hearing could pick up any movement inside. Not a peep. The place was empty.
“Looks like no one’s home.” Ray knocked again.
The stairs creaked.
Ray and I whirled around to see a princess in an aqua costume gown. Something was off though. This was the burliest princess I’d ever seen, complete with bulging biceps and hair-covered knuckles. She wore one of those plastic masks and a fluffy blond wig with a gleaming tiara in the middle.
“You’re too nosey for your own good,” the princess said in a deep baritone.
Ray kept his cool despite the bizarre appearance of our assailant. “I was just calling on Tommy.”
“What’s your business with ’im?”
“I have a message from Sonja.”
“Yeah? Well I got a message for you!” Princess hauled back her scepter and beaned Ray on the head.
“Hey!” Ray grabbed one end of the scepter.
They grappled with it, weaving precariously close to the stairs. I leaped up onto the railing, ready to jump on the back of the perpetrator. But first, I wanted to size up the situation. If the perp fell down the stairs with me on his back, that might hurt.
Ray gained the upper hand, shoving Princess against the railing. I leaped off to the safety of the hallway. The railing was open to below, and it was a long way down. Even a cat as skilled as I was at landing on his feet might stub a toe or worse.
“Who are you and who sent you?” Ray demanded as he held the princess’s head. His upper body leaned precariously over the railing.
“Don’t play dumb with me!” The princess jerked away, leaving Ray holding a blond wig. He stared at the wig for a few seconds too long. The now-bald princess lunged at him, barreling into Ray’s gut with his head.
“Ooof!” Ray staggered backward.
Oh no! He teetered at the top step, the heel of his shoe drifting out into open air. And then, as if in slow motion, he started falling backward.
There was nothing I could do but watch him tumble down the stairs. I knew he was still alive, though, because each step was punctuated with a groan or cuss word.
Princess Baldy ran down after him, looming over Ray as he lay on the landing, his eyes glazing over. The princess pulled something out from under his skirt, and my heart skipped a beat.
Oh no! He’s going to shoot Ray!
But it wasn’t a gun… it was a small loaf of sweet bread.
Princess Baldy tossed the loaf onto Ray’s chest. “Tommy ain’t home, but I got a message from him. Mind. Your. Own. Business.”
Then he snatched up his wig, plopped it on his head, and left without even a glance in my direction.
I should have followed the princess, but I was worried about Ray lying there with a sweet bread loaf on his chest in the foyer. He was out cold. I poked at him with my paw. Nothing. I hated to do it, but drastic times need drastic measures, so I unsheathed my claws and gave him a good jab.
“Ouch!” He grabbed his arm, and I jumped back.
“What happened?” His cloudy eyes cleared as he realized where he was. He looked at the loaf of sweet bread on his chest. It made a nice presentation, wrapped in a slightly pink-tinted Saran Wrap and tied with a pink bow. Looked like it had cream cheese frosting on the top too. “What in the world is this?”
I sniffed. Pumpkin bread.
Ray sat up and rubbed the top of his head. I could see he was getting less groggy. I busied myself with grooming while he recovered.
After a few minutes, he stood. Looking down at the pumpkin bread, he rubbed his jaw. “I wonder why he left this?”
Good question. I hope you don’t try to eat it.
“I’m not eating this; who knows what they put in it? But this proves one thing. If Tommy Piccolo is sending this warning, then we must be onto something.”
Good thinking.
“And I know what to do next. We need to go to the source. Sonja said her pumpkin was going to win the contest. That seems to be the key.” Ray looked at his watch. “The town Halloween party starts in an hour, and the judging is at seven-thirty. I say we go there and see what we can see.”
Good boy. He was finally starting to think things through on his own.
5
The Halloween party and pumpkin judging contest were held in the old town hall. It was getting dark as we drove through town. The full moon was just starting to rise, and it created an eerie backlight to the bare branches of the trees.
Driving made it hard for me to tell if the witch and vampire were still following us, but it was a bit too far to walk, and Ray had mentioned he was concerned about me walking the streets on Halloween. He could be very sweet sometimes. Maybe it was best to drive; that would make it harder for the vampire and witch to follow us. They may have been the ones that tipped Tommy off to our visit to his apartment, and if so, I didn’t want to see what they might do to us next.
The place was already crowded. People milled about wearing all kinds of costumes. Devils, ghosts, werewolves. I fit right in.
There were fake cobwebs everywhere, spiders hanging from the wooden beams, and coffins with skeletons. The air was spiced with the scent of spiced pumpkin punch and every so often, a ghoulish disembodied laugh would come from the corner. Spooky music was piped in.
Vendors were set up at sheet-covered tables, selling Halloween-related items.
We’d been there only a few minutes when I saw that one of them had a loaf of pumpkin bread wrapped in pink, just like the one the bald princess had left on Ray.
I tried to get Ray’s attention, but he was busy chatting it up with a redheaded devil with hourglass curves and big horns. My telepathy didn’t get through.
I nudged his calf, but he ignored me.
I tried her, telegraphing that Ray was married with five kids. It worked. She made excuses and left.
Shortly thereafter, Ray got my message. He scanned the room, his gaze stopping on the pumpkin bread. “Hey, look. That pumpkin bread looks awfully familiar. Is that cream cheese frosting?”
The man looked excited when he saw us coming over. His booth sold glow sticks, and he proceeded to show Ray his wares.
“Where’d you get the pumpkin bread?” Ray asked.
“What’s it to you?” The man’s friendly demeanor changed, and he now looked at Ray with suspicion.
“I like pumpkins.” Ray looked around. “I was wondering where I could get some.”
The man snatched it up and shoved it under the counter as if afraid Ray would make off with it. “Got it from a friend. You gonna buy something or not?”
“I don’t know.” Ray scanned the room, probably looking for the carved pumpkins. I’d already done that and hadn’t seen them on display. Maybe they were saving them for the judging.
The man’s suspicions grew. “Where’s your costume?”
“Huh?” Ray turned back to him. Maybe he sensed he was getting into hot water because he glanced down and hesitated a few beats before brightening and pointing to me. “I’m a guy with a black cat.”
The man peered over the counter. “Oh, I see.” He pulled out a round glow ring. “This would go great around his neck.”
Oh no, you don’t. I don’t like anything around my neck. Hopefully, Ray would remember that.
“Maybe later.” Ray was still scanning. “Where are the carved jack-o’-lanterns? I heard there was going to be a big contest.”
“That’s later. They keep them hidden until the judging.” The man’s eyes narrowed. “Why, you got one in the contest?”
“You might say that,” Ray said as he inched away.
I was wondering what he planned to do next when he ducked behind a giant mechanical witch, who was stirring up a cauldron. His eyes were glued to the man with the pumpkin bread.
“That bread can’t be a coincidence. Let’s see if he goes somewhere.”
It didn’t take long. About five minutes
later, the man put a “Be back in thirty minutes” sign up on his table, grabbed the loaf of pumpkin bread, and slipped out a side door.
We followed—me looking back for witches and vampires and Ray forging blindly ahead.
The door led to a dimly lit corridor. I didn’t have a good feeling about this and was about to telepath that to Ray when two thugs lurched out of the shadows, each roughly grabbing one of Ray’s elbows.
“Well, looky here. Tommy’s not going to be happy to see you,” one of them said. He was bald, and I couldn’t be sure because he wasn’t in costume, but I thought he was the princess that had pushed Ray down the stairs.
“I thought I told you Tommy didn’t want you nosing around.”
“I’m just here for the pumpkin contest.” Ray tried to keep his dignity, but it must have been hard considering how they were half dragging him along.
“You were warned. Now you’re going to have to answer to Tommy himself,” the other said then kicked open a door.
“And you’re not going to like it,” Baldy added as he pushed Ray through.
6
I don’t think the two thugs even noticed me. I’m pretty used to that since I’m below eye level and quiet on my paws. I managed to scoot in before the door closed. Ray tried to keep up jovial banter as they dragged him upstairs.
Baldy kicked the small door open at the top, and we all spilled out onto the roof.
The first thing I noticed was the jack-o’-lanterns lined up on the roof ledge. The roof had a brick wall about three feet high with a cement ledge on top. Six pumpkins were lined up on top of the ledge. They looked pretty with the light of the full moon shining through their carvings. Nice ones, too, carved with all sorts of things—witches, spiders, faces, and a cat. That must be Sonja’s. Maybe her story wasn’t that fishy after all.
The second thing I noticed was a burly tattooed character, sitting behind a table loaded with various loaves of frosted pumpkin bread.
Our two escorts threw Ray down in front of the tattooed guy then stepped back. “Here he is, boss.”
I guessed the tattoo guy was Tommy. I stuck to the shadows like a ghost; I didn’t fancy being thrown off the ledge if Tommy took a dislike to me.
Tommy came around and looked down at Ray. “How’d you like the pumpkin bread I sent?” He gestured back to the table. “I’m trying out some recipes here and need someone’s opinions.”
Ray got to his feet and brushed off his pants. “Didn’t try it.”
“So, why are you spying on me?”
“Spying? I was just minding my own business at the Halloween party. Your friends over there dragged me up here.” Ray’s eyes widened as he noticed the pumpkins.
Tommy looked at his guys and jerked his head toward an old metal folded chair that was against the ledge.
Baldy dragged the chair over, and the other one pushed Ray into it, then bound his hands behind him with rope.
I unleashed my shivs. They were razor sharp, and I was certain I could cut through that rope. It wasn’t even that thick, more like twine. These guys were clearly amateurs. But how could I get close enough to work on the ropes without Tommy or his henchmen seeing me and tossing me off the roof?
Tommy stood in front of the chair, a pumpkin carving knife in one hand and a spatula in the other. The knife I could figure out; I didn’t want to know what the spatula was for.
Tommy held the knife to Ray’s neck. “I’m asking nice. Why were you spying? Did someone hire you?”
“Hire me to spy? Nope.”
“But someone hired you?”
“Yeah, but—”
A racket in the street below captured everyone’s attention.
Tommy peered over the ledge then looked at his allies. “Go see what that’s about. I got business with this guy here.”
Baldy and his friend left. This was good. It meant it was two against one, and I was sure Ray and I could take Tommy.
Tommy turned back to Ray and held up the spatula. “Now tell me what you’re up to or else.”
Ray didn’t look concerned. “What are you gonna do, mix it out of me?”
“Don’t be a wise guy.” Tommy stepped closer. He appeared rather angry, judging by the way his face got all red.
Ray didn’t seem to notice. “I wouldn’t want to give you an answer that was half-baked.”
This angered Tommy even more, but now he was distracted, his focus on Ray. I rushed up behind Ray and got to work on the ropes. He must have felt me back there because he wriggled his hands.
“I’m going to give you one last chance.” Tommy was looming over Ray now, the spatula in one hand, knife in the other as my claws sliced through the rope.
“Don’t need one.” Ray launched out of the chair, his forehead connecting with Tommy’s nose.
Tommy stumbled backward, dropping the spatula as his hand flew to his nose, which was now gushing blood. He raised the knife. “Now you’re gonna be sorry!”
He lunged at Ray, and they both went down, collapsing the table that held the bread. The sweet breads rolled everywhere. I saw pumpkin, cranberry, and banana. Some were frosted; some were plain. The banana had chocolate chips.
Ray and Tommy didn’t notice. They continued to fight even though they were smooshing the breads. I watched helplessly as they rolled around the roof in a heap of fists and crumbs.
I rushed over to try to help Ray out, but they were rolling around too much for me to get a claw in.
Ray kicked out at Tommy.
Tommy flipped around, and suddenly, he was on top with the knife raised to lash down!
Ray bucked up and dislodged Tommy. The knife clattered to the floor.
Ray reached for it, but Tommy clawed him back.
I had to do something! I was good at whacking things with my paws. If I could just skitter the knife over to Ray—no, that was too risky. They were moving around too much, and though my aim was quite accurate, I could end up pushing it straight to Tommy. There had to be something else.
The pumpkins caught my eye. They were above where Ray and Tommy were grappling… if I could push one off, it might distract Tommy long enough for Ray to take control.
I leapt onto the ledge, unafraid even though it was a long way down. Okay, not super long—it was only two stories—but still.
Now if I could just get a good shot. I had to hit Tommy in order to make this work.
I waited patiently as they rolled around, fists flying in every direction. I didn’t want to miss and hit Ray by mistake. This required precise timing. I was pretty good at that, having pushed dozens of items off counters and desks. Though I’d never worked with anything as big as a pumpkin.
Finally, they rolled right under me. Tommy’s head was positioned perfectly under the pumpkin with the cat carving. I shoved.
Smash!
Perfect aim!
The pumpkin broke on Tommy’s head. Sonja must not have been very good at removing everything from the innards when she carved it because pumpkin guts spewed everywhere. It was a shame really. The cat carving was so lovely. Sonja had been right; that one was sure to be a winner.
“Hey!” Tommy sputtered, pumpkin flying out of his mouth. Instinctively, his hands went up to clear his eyes. Ray seized the opportunity and lunged for the knife, which was now covered in pumpkin. He plunged his hand into the pumpkin mess to grab it, and then a funny look crossed his face.
He pulled his hand away and opened his palm, staring. “Well, will you look at that.”
I looked down. In his hand, amidst the seeds and pumpkin goop, something glittered in the moonlight.
Five shiny diamonds.
7
Visions of the reward danced in my head, but Tommy was pulling pumpkin goo out of his eyes, and Ray needed to forget about the diamonds and grab the knife.
Luckily, he caught my thoughts and reached for the knife just as Tommy cleared his vision.
“I’m going to finish you!” Tommy said.
But before he could mak
e good on that threat, the roof door burst open!
At first, I was afraid it was his friends. Three against one man and a cat weren’t good odds. Imagine my surprise when what came rushing through the door was a witch. The same witch that had been following us. My relief at it not being the two assailants was short-lived though, because she had a gun in her hand, and it looked like she meant business.
“I’ll take those.” The witch snatched the diamonds out of Ray’s hand. Apparently, he was too surprised to resist. Though it might have been the gun in his face that made him hand them over so easily. “Thanks for finding the pumpkin.”
The witch pulled off her warty nose.
“Sonja?” Ray and Tommy said at the same time.
She laughed. “Yep. Outsmarted you both.”
“Wait a minute.” Ray glanced between Tommy and Sonja, looking confused. “So you really are her ex-boyfriend?
“Ex-boyfriend?” Tommy made a face. “No. She’s from my cooking class. Except it looks like she was doing more eavesdropping than cooking.”
Sonja smirked. “I have good ears. When I heard about your little diamond-smuggling scheme, I figured I’d count myself in.”
“And you hired me to find the pumpkin because the diamonds were in it,” Ray said, stating the obvious.
Sonja nodded. “I figured a PI could find it easier, and it would be less dangerous for me.”
She could say that again. Ray had been clobbered by a clown and pushed down the stairs by a princess. All she had to do was follow him around and watch him get beat up then swoop in at the end to grab her prize.
“So you have the diamonds now. Why not scram?” Tommy eyed the gun.
“This is only five. Where are the rest?” Sonja eyed the pumpkin goo.
“Not in there,” Tommy said. “I split them up between the Halloween candy and jack-o’-lanterns. That’s how we hand them off to the buyers without getting caught. The cops are watching, and I can’t have a lot of traffic going in and out, so the Halloween party makes a perfect excuse.”