I didn’t even know that I was crying until I tasted the tears on my lips. I wanted to say something. My mouth opened but nothing came out. I stood there staring at the floor. I didn’t know whether to run and hide away from this or stand there and finally start laying the demons to rest.
“I remember my Mom telling me that Dad had been in a car accident. But she wouldn’t speak of it anymore after that and Aunt Mary forbade me to speak of him.”
“Was it terrible living with them?” he asked watching me.
I struggled with what to say. To tell him the truth required dredging up painful, anger-filled memories for myself. To tell him the truth would only cause him pain and concern. I was torn between not wanting to cause him pain and not wanting his concern. But my struggle was obvious to him.
“I see.”
“No, you don’t see,” I said. The rage starting to rise upward, but I bit it off with a curse. Tommy calmly looked at me. “You’re right, Laney, I don’t know and I won’t know unless you tell me. You either don’t trust me enough to tell me or you don’t want to burden me with what obviously are some very painful memories. I can appreciate both. But it doesn’t change the fact that I am sorry. Sorry for the years I was denied my best friend and sorry for the love you didn’t get. I promise, though, I am nothing if not patient.”
He stood up and walked by me, lightly setting his large hand on my shoulder. “I am very patient,” and he walked out. I slowly sat down on the couch and wept bitter, bitter tears.
I woke up on the couch in the wee hours of the morning with a blanket draped over me. I folded up the blanket and then stumbled out of the house, across the yard, and up the steps into my apartment before collapsing into bed. But now sleep eluded me. “Well, hell,” I muttered and got up and put on my sweats and running shoes, slipping out the back door into the pre-dawn light. The only sounds were a far off foghorn and the dripping rain. I spent a few minutes stretching and then started at an easy jog up the street. Since I had spent several mornings exploring the surrounding neighborhood, I had a route already in mind. I set my pace on the low, flat streets before heading up the steep hills San Francisco is famous for. The air was cool and damp but it felt really good to be out. I was beginning to realize how long I had lain in a stupor, languishing in heartache.
William’s untimely death had sent me in a tailspin. My own apathy had landed me at the bottom of a canyon. Maybe. — just maybe — I was finally climbing back up toward the top again. Maybe I even felt like climbing back up. As I see it, if you hit rock bottom you have two choices. One, you go the extra step and end your life. Two, you look upward because for once it cannot get any worse and Murphy’s Law has done all it can to apply itself to your life. I figured I could only go up. I didn’t think about the aberrations of a sidestep here and there.
That day’s book signing was in south San Francisco. I got the use of a company car so I arrived early to check things out. It seemed Steven had arrived early as well to set things up his way. Thankfully, the manager was the daughter of a Woo alarm technician so she was open to any of my suggestions and overrode Steven’s comments on how to arrange the signing. I truly tried not to gloat. I doubt I succeeded, but I did try.
The crowd was heavy for this signing as well. Four hours into it, a rather pushy lady finally got her turn at the table. She had so much perfume on I nearly smelled her before seeing her, but the glow from her bright pink, skintight jumpsuit got there first. She had also brought her Pomeranian, a little dog that wore bows in his fur and emitted a constant yipping. She set him on the table as she handed her book to Miss Heart.
“I loved your Love’s Journey so much I bought a Pomeranian, as well. His name is Clancy, too.” She gushed while Miss Heart signed her book. Thankfully my sunglasses hid the fact that I was rolling my eyes. Poor Clancy had to wear pink bows — no wonder he barked so much. Miss Heart never missed a beat. She treated the whole thing like it was the most original idea in the world. I had to give her credit. She gave her fans one hundred percent. They were important to her and she took the time to let them know that. I understood why she didn’t leave the table until the last book was signed. It was her way of saying “thanks for reading my story.” I guess when you’re a writer you hang a part of yourself out to the four winds and hope that someone out there appreciates your gut-wrenching work.
I happened to look up at a man steadily making his way toward the table, giving the impression he was looking for someone. An area in front of the tables had been roped off but there were still people at the rope, taking pictures and watching the author meet and greet her fans as they filed by. But this man was heading toward us with a purpose. He wasn’t dressed like most of the people around him; he looked about a week past a good shave and a Laundromat. Far be it from me to judge people on their looks, but my warning bells went off as I slowly stepped closer to Miss Heart. It was then he seemed to see what he was looking for as he moved forward.
Just like in the movies, it all really does happen in slow motion. The man moved forward at a run. The ropes in front fell down as someone tripped over them. I moved to block his path to Miss Heart, but in an instant I realized his intent wasn’t for her, but for me. He was looking dead at me as he pulled a knife from under his jacket and leapt over the table.
I managed to shove Miss Heart off her chair to the floor, offering only my right side to the knife wielder, but that was enough. He hit me like a linebacker and we tumbled backward. I tried to get my body turned right to stop the knife’s descent but I only managed to deflect it upward before he plunged the blade into the flesh of my right shoulder. I have no idea how I managed to flip him off me.
Divert the pain! Divert the pain, I told myself. How? There was so damn much of it! I popped back up, adrenaline racing through me like a freight train. My attacker was already off and running through the dispersing crowd and shelves of books. I gave a fleeting thought to going after him but mentally kicked myself to remember what my job was. I started to kneel down to check Miss Heart but she had already gotten to her feet and was issuing orders like a general. She took one look at the knife sticking out of me and demanded an ambulance be called. I tried telling her I was just fine but she would have none of it. Thankfully the store manager was on her toes, clearing out the crowd and calling the police. I leaned against a wooden pillar and called Woo for back up. I looked around the room as Steven walked in from the back. He took one look at me and I knew he was not happy to see me upright. Now that was interesting.
The police showed up as well as Chase and Mike. How did those two get here so fast? Did they have a transporter somewhere in the bowels of the company?
Steven tried to convince Miss Heart to sit down and rest but she ignored him and went head to head with the police who were taking statements.
Steven noticed Chase walk in and made a beeline right for him demanding an explanation at my lack of ability to have stopped such an attack. I wanted to point at the knife and say I thought I stopped it pretty damn good but Mike stepped in front of Steven and with one look managed to silence him. Way to go, Mike. Their staring contest was interrupted by the arrival of the paramedics. Great. I really just wanted to go home to bed but everyone was making a big deal about the damn knife. I didn’t see the big deal. It hardly hurt now. Not unless I moved.
“Come on, tough guy,” said Mike gently while Chase was talking with the police. “Let’s let them take you to the hospital and get that toothpick out.”
“Oh, sure. I bet you’re going to regale me about the time you had a bigger knife stuck in you, huh? What about Miss Heart?”
Mike just shook his head, laughing. “She’s fine and Jason is here to take over for you for now. I’ll ride with you to the hospital so I can regale you with just such a story.” I allowed them to cart me off to the hospital where we were met by Dr. Peter. “So you not only make house calls, you’re the company do
ctor too?”
“Let’s just say that I could probably retire a happy man on what I make from patching you Woo folks up.” The process of removing the knife was not as difficult as I thought it would be. Perhaps because by the time he was working on it, I was feeling the effects of whatever they had given me for the pain. Dr. Peter said that leaving the knife in the wound had actually kept me from losing too much blood and had missed the most vital veins and arteries. I certainly didn’t like the tetanus shot, though, and yelped when the sadistic nurse stuck the needle in.
“Oh, good grief. Don’t be such a baby,” said Mike, who had not left my side. I just glared at him and the nurse. I made my statement to the police and finally found myself alone with Chase and Mike.
“No sign of him, huh?” I knew the answer before I even asked the question.
“No. He got away through the back.”
“Not surprising. I bet it was through a door that just happened to be unlocked when it wasn’t supposed to be.” Chase and Mike looked at each other.
“Why do you say that?” asked Mike.
“Because the asshole was gunning for me. I saw him heading to the table, looking for someone. He spotted me and came right at me. I moved to protect Miss Heart but his eyes were only for me. Maybe his MO was to take out the hired gun first but I doubt it.”
“You piss off anyone lately?”
“Is it day time? I don’t know. I’ve gone head to head with Mr. Ray twice now. Maybe he wants me gone?” I started to get out of the bed, but Mike placed his hand on my head and firmly pushed me back. “If she’s back to book signing tomorrow, then so am I.” Chase only arched an eyebrow at me. “You can put someone in the crowd as back up but I am not backing down from this.” I was quite adamant. Chase nodded, but didn’t agree with me. He didn’t disagree, either, so I figured I still had a chance of winning this round.
Before I could say anything else, Miss Heart came bustling in and walked right up to Chase. “You make sure this woman gets a commendation for her bravery today. Damn fine work. Don’t be surprised if this ends up in one of my books.” I looked at Mike who had turned away to keep from laughing. Good grief.
“Miss Heart, are you all right?” I tried to get up again but she placed herself next to my good side and patted my arm.
“Laney, you are not to worry about me. I’m fine. Now anything you need, you just ask. I’m paying for this as well. I will be back in the morning to see you.”
“Umm, ma’am, I’m not staying the night.”
“You most certainly are!”
I wasn’t about to argue with her. My head was spinning a bit and all I really wanted was to close my eyes and sleep. The lack of any solid, uninterrupted sleep over the last few days had finally hit me. Maybe that was why I got knifed. I was too tired to move fast enough.
Then Tommy barged in, aiming a killing look at Chase who only shrugged. Jesus, the place was busier than Grand Central Station. Tommy walked to the bedside and took my good hand in his. “You okay?”
I could tell he wanted to be protective but was still trying to allow me space to be tough. I don’t think I could have loved him more for that. I squeezed his hand. “I’m fine, Tommy. You know how hard it is to keep a Murphy down.”
“Damn right. I called Molly. She will be waiting at home for you. We’re putting you in one of the bedrooms in the house.” Okay, enough was enough. “Look. I’m very appreciative of everyone’s concern but I am not, I repeat, I am not staying the night here and I don’t need to be babied.”
Well that started it. Tommy started arguing with Chase while Miss Heart was telling Joan to make sure that a specialist looked at my shoulder.
I sat up and swung my legs over the bedside just as Dr. Peter came back in. His whistle was shrill and got everyone’s attention. “Might I remind all of you that this is a hospital?” He looked at me, continuing “I would like to keep you overnight. Humor me at least and nod your head that you’re listening.” I nodded with a grin.
He sighed, “Why do I bother? I’d like you to rest, though.” I gave Dr. Peter a bland look. He sighed again, “Forget I asked. Laney, it needs time to heal.” I swear, he jarred my shoulder on purpose as he slipped my sling on.
“All right, all right. I’ll see what I can do.” Mike offered his arm as I got down off the bed but I ignored it. My legs were wobbly so he took my good arm anyway.
It seemed to take forever to get back home. Molly met me at the door and ordered me straight to bed but I headed over to the couch and sat down, biting back an oath at the pain shooting down my arm. I laid my head back and closed my eyes, waiting for the comments about my childish behavior but they did not come. I must have fallen asleep when I woke to the sound of voices near me.
A new voice caught my attention and I tried to focus on what it was saying, pretending to be asleep.
“Hey, bro, how’s it going?” said an unfamiliar male voice, and I heard the slapping sound of manly pats on the back.
“Going okay. I didn’t know you were coming home,” Sean said, as a chair creaked nearby. I heard a low whistle.
“Wow, who is this and where do I get one? You guarding this one? How come this whole place is in an uproar?” asked the new voice as it moved closer to me.
I opened one eye just enough to make out who this new voice was and saw a younger version of Tommy. Must be Ryan.
Sean sat down and stretched his legs out, “Which question do you want answered first? First off, no, I am not guarding her. I damn sure wish I had been. Second, no, you cannot get one. I staked my claim first. This is Laney, but you’d know that if you called here once in a while. And trust me, when they made her they broke the mold — thankfully. The place is in an uproar, and your appearance is overshadowed, because Laney was stabbed today while protecting a client. Last but not least, she is laying there listening to everything we’re saying.”
I opened both eyes and looked at Sean who barely smiled at me. Uh oh, I was in trouble again. Oh, for heaven’s sake, what now? I tried to sit up and only halfway held back a moan of pain. Ryan knelt down next to the couch. “Don’t get up on my account. Damn shame you’re taken. Nice to meet you, Laney.”
“Likewise,” I said still watching Sean who was still glaring at me, “And I’m not taken.” Ryan looked from me to Sean and back to me. “Well it’s a rule that brothers don’t poach so I’ll behave.”
“Ryan can I ask a favor?”
“Sure.”
“Can you get me a glass of water?” He looked at me and then at Sean. “Oh, sure. I can leave the room so you two can talk or make smoochy faces. Besides, Mom and Da don’t even know I’m here yet.” Ryan stood up and then looked at me again. “Damn shame,” he said with a grin and a shake of his head as he left the room. I tried to sit up again but gave up.
“Go ahead, Slick, spit it out. You got a captive audience here, so go ahead and yell at me about getting hurt or whatever bug is up your ass.” I was hurting like hell and it was making me a bit grumpy. Hell, it was making me a bitch, but who’s counting?
He stood up and paced the room, running his hands through his hair. I laid there and calmly waited for him to run down or let it out. He stopped pacing and looked out the window at the coming darkness. “Damn it. Why didn’t someone call me? You should have had someone call me. I had to hear about it on the radio?”
“Radio?”
“Yes, on the radio. You have already made the evening news too. But that’s beside the point. Don’t you think I would have wanted to have known you were hurt?”
“Well gee I’m sorry there wasn’t time to think of that. I was a bit busy dealing with a knife in my arm!” I sat up and cried out in pain, bright points of light flashing in my head as I fell back. Sean was immediately by my side.
“Christ. I’m sorry. I … ” His voice broke and I looke
d at him in shock.
“Don’t! Just don’t. I’m fine.” I would not have held up had he shed one tear. I knew I would have fallen apart.
“Damn it, no, you’re not fine! All the radio said that a Woo security guard had been stabbed at a bookstore. I had this horrible fear that I’d lost you. I called Chase and only got his voicemail. I had to get in touch with Dallas to fill me in. By the time I was done with Boris, you had already left the hospital. Chase called to tell me you were here.”
I reached up and touched his cheek and he kissed my palm. “Sean, I’m fine. Yes, it hurts — like you wouldn’t believe — but I’m okay. I’m sorry I didn’t call you, though. But what would I have said? ‘Hey, Sean, guess what? I got stabbed at work today, how are you?’ It wasn’t exactly on the forefront of my mind.” I could tell I had hurt him and it pained me to do so. “Sean, I know you think that there is something happening between us.”
“Not think. Know.”
“Fine, you think you know, but I don’t know how I feel about that. Life has this ugly habit of taking those I love away from me and I cannot go through that again.”
“Oh, so it’s okay if I go through that, thinking that I may have lost you when I only just figured out that I like you more than I want to knock you on your ass?”
He sat back on the floor and leaned his head against the couch. “Wait. Just give me a minute. I’m not making it any easier trying to get past the fear and frustration. Just give me a minute.” Sean’s closed his eyes and took a few calming breaths.
I laid my hand on his head and stroked his hair, running my fingers through it, separating the different shades of brown that ran through it. “I have wanted to do this for a long time. Just touch your hair. Be with you like this. Just be. You’re on my mind all too often, especially when I don’t want you to be.”
Sexy in the City Page 27