by D T Dyllin
I seemed to be the only silent witness to the breach of our world. And then, just like that, they blurred off into the distance, too fast for my eyes to track. With horror, I realized they had disappeared, and I had no idea where they’d gone. They could be anywhere—anywhere at all. I had to tell everyone. Warn them before it was too late. I had to—
“P.J. Hey, P.J. Wake up,” Jenna said with annoyance. “You’re having a nightmare, and I’m trying to sleep.”
I opened my eyes and tried to sit up, but my head was pounding. Reaching up, I grabbed my temples, almost sure I’d find brain matter of some sort oozing out. “What happened?” I tried to focus my eyes, but everything was blurry.
“I’ll tell you what happened. You got too drunk, you puked on my dress—but not before managing to rip it—and then you passed out. Me and Bryn brought you back to my place where I’ve been trying to sleep.”
Events from earlier in the evening came flooding back with crystal clarity. I groaned as I tried to process everything that happened. “Where’s Bryn?” was all I could manage.
“I made him go home. He wanted to stay, but I was afraid if my parents came home early and found him here, they’d blow a gasket.” Jenna said around a yawn. “Now go back to sleep.”
“But he’s my Guardian,” I groused.
“As my mom would say, he’s not your Guardian yet, so go to sleep.” I heard Jenna flop over on her bed.
“Wait. I had a premonition. We have to warn people.” Finally that got a real reaction out of her, but not the one I expected.
“You got drunk, hit your head, and passed out. You didn’t have a premonition, you just think you did.” Jenna flung a pillow that hit me in my face. “Now go to sleep.”
“Fine,” I muttered to myself as I stumbled out of Jenna’s guest twin bed. If Jenna wouldn’t listen to me, I would find someone who would. As I made my way out into the hallway, I tripped over something in the middle of the floor. “What the hell?” I yelled as I lurched forward in the dark. Strong, familiar arms caught me before I face-planted.
“What are you doing?” Bryn stage whispered. “Go back to bed.”
“What are you doing in the middle of the floor?” I asked incredulously. “It’s a good way to get kicked in the head, and send someone hurtling to their death, I might add.”
“I wasn’t in the middle of the floor, I was leaning against the wall. You just don’t have any depth perception.”
“Hey. It’s dark. I—”
The hallway light flicked on, and a very annoyed Jenna glared out from under a tangled mess of red hair. “What the hell? I told you to go home.”
Bryn glared back at Jenna. “I couldn’t just leave her. I was worried. Besides, if someone hadn’t let her go stumbling around in the dark, you would’ve never known I was here.”
“I’m not her babysitter,” Jenna snapped.
“How about trying to be a concerned friend?” Bryn growled.
My friends were completely exasperating. “I have no time for this. I have to warn everyone about the premonition I just had.”
Bryn’s head snapped back towards me. “What? What’d you see?”
“Nothing. She was drunk and hit her head, remember?” Jenna said with a sigh. “So can we all just go back to bed, please?”
Bryn studied my face for a second before responding. “Do you really think you had a premonition, or do you think Jenna could be right?”
I met Bryn’s blue eyes and shivered, thinking of the kisses we had shared earlier. Recognition of my reaction to him played briefly across his face before he looked away. I swallowed, trying to fight the sudden dryness in my throat. It finally dawned on me that I still had Bryn’s shirt on and almost nothing else on underneath. He hadn’t bothered to find another shirt, so he stood in Jenna’s hallway in nothing but his jeans and socks. I found myself wondering if Bryn was a boxer or brief kind of guy, or maybe he went commando? I wanted nothing more than to close the distance between us, and run my hands over his finely honed muscles and smooth skin; to dip my hands underneath the waistband of his jeans so I could find the answer to my question.
“What’s wrong with you guys? I’m getting some really weird vibes from you two right now.” Jenna looked back and forth between the two of us. “Well?”
I couldn’t let Jenna know. What happened between Bryn and I, and the potential of what could happen between us in the future—that was staying between just the two of us. I had to say something to distract her fast. “It felt like a premonition, but I don’t know. Bryn—what do you think?”
He was careful not to meet my eyes again as he spoke. “If it was something that major, then someone else had to have seen it—another Seer, I mean. You should just go back to sleep, and we can figure it all out tomorrow.”
“Yeah, I guess.” Standing out in Jenna’s hallway made the premonition, or whatever it was, seem too surreal to be plausible. Besides, Bryn was right, how could it be possible for me to have been the only one to see such an important vision, especially when I’d never had any before? Chances were, with having hit my head and having been buzzed, I’d just had a very realistic dream. And of course, in my dream I’d be the only one who could save the day. It was an excellent way for my psyche to make up for the fact that I hadn’t had any real premonitions yet—just give me the Mac Daddy of all premonitions to make myself feel extra special. On to more important issues, I supposed. “Are you going to keep sleeping in the hallway?”
“Probably,” Bryn said while running a hand through his black hair. “It would make me feel better to kind of stand guard for you, since I will be your Guardian one day.” He met my eyes with meaning. Yeah, yeah; I knew what he was trying to get at, and I didn’t care. I let my gaze briefly pass over his smooth, muscular upper body before returning to his perfectly chiseled face.
“You could keep a closer watch if you stayed in Jenna’s room with us.” I bit my lower lip and smiled at him. “I mean, you could always stay in my bed, with me, so you could keep a very close eye on me.”
“Oh, hellz, no,” Jenna interjected. I had almost forgotten she was standing there. “If he wants to be all creepy and stay in the hallway, fine. At least he has a leg to stand on with the whole future Guardian thing with that situation. But if my parents caught him in bed with you, no matter how platonic we all know it would be, there’d be no escape from punishment for any of us.”
I raised my eyebrows at Bryn, asking him a silent question. How platonic would it be now that we’d crossed that line? Would he be able to just hold me like he used to under the guise of friendship now that he knew that I loved him and wanted him, too? From the tormented look on his face, I was guessing the answer was no. Was he imagining what it would be like to be naked in bed with me right now? I sighed loudly thinking about it myself.
Jenna looked at me sharply. “Seriously—what is going on with you guys?”
I forced a yawn. “Going back to bed now.” Luckily it was always easy to distract her.
“Finally,” she muttered, flicking the hallway light off. I stumbled back into bed and crawled under the sheets, shutting my eyes against my pounding head. I thought with how crappy I felt, the minute my head touched the pillow I would have had an instant ticket to dreamland, but instead, all I could think about was Bryn; Bryn, and his half-undressed state, currently residing right outside Jenna’s door. It was like the kiss we shared earlier had unlocked all these feelings that had been pent up for years. I sure would have liked to unwrap him as a birthday present. Ugh. I’m starting to sound like Jenna. The fact was that I just wanted to be near him—something that I always craved; it was just that now I actually knew my motivations.
I stumbled out of bed again and crept back into the hallway. This time I had a pretty good idea where Bryn had situated himself so that I wouldn’t trip over him ag
ain. I heard him sigh in the dark as I dropped to all fours and reached my hand out to search for him.
“What are you doing?” he whispered, tension evident in his voice.
“Where are you?” I asked ignoring his question. I felt his hand take mine in response, tugging me forward. “You’d think Seers would have better night vision,” I grumbled. When I found him there in the dark, I pushed my way under his arm to snuggle up close to him. “I still don’t feel good.” I ran my hand slowly over his chest and inhaled his scent deeply. Mmmm . . . there is nothing like the spicy aroma of Bryn mixed with soap. I was sure I could make a lot of money if I bottled and sold the purely masculine—and suddenly very sexy—scent that was all Bryn.
It seemed like every muscle in his body tensed. “So go back into your nice, comfortable bed.”
“But you always make things better when I don’t feel good.” I pouted. There had always been something comforting about Bryn’s presence. I couldn’t even begin to count how many times we’d spent the night together with me in his arms. Of course, things were a little different now that we’d crossed a line earlier.
“Things are different now,” Bryn said warily, saying the same thing I’d just been thinking.
“So what? Now I can’t be close to you anymore?”
“You know what I mean, Peej.”
“Just hold me,” I snapped obstinately. I wasn’t going to let him push me away—literally or metaphorically.
I heard him sigh in the dark again, just before his arms encircled me. I snuggled into his side, my head on his chest, and I brought one leg up and over his. I was happier than a clichéd bug in a rug. The tension I felt in his body only seemed to last a few minutes before his breathing became more even as he drifted off to sleep. Feeling so safe and content in his arms, I wasn’t far behind.
5
Things were pretty awkward between Bryn and me that morning when we woke up. He still insisted on keeping his hands to himself, much to my chagrin. And as soon as he disentangled from me, he left so fast I was surprised there wasn’t a Bryn shaped hole in the door. When did things get so complicated? Oh, that’s right—last night when I’d drunk too much, stripped, and threw myself at Bryn, then proceeded to puke and pass out in front of him as well. Talk about putting in a good night’s work.
I was currently getting ready for our families’ joint birthday celebration. It was generally pretty low key—just our families, a nice dinner, some cake and ice cream to follow, and then, of course, presents. I usually had a good time sharing the birthday spotlight with Bryn, but I had to wonder how high the tension meter would be registering between us tonight. If the nervous flutter in my stomach was any indication, fairly high.
“What’s wrong, peanut?” I lifted my eyes to see my mom standing in my bedroom doorway, her face reflected in the mirror of my vanity. Her green eyes blinked at me with concern from her small, finely featured face. I noticed that she had styled her shoulder length reddish hair into a neat updo. A chignon maybe? She never wore very much makeup because she had a simple, natural beauty; today was no different.
“Nothing. Why?” I said absently as I set down the lip gloss I had just applied.
“Oh, I don’t know, maybe because I’ve been standing here saying your name for the last five minutes.”
I gave my mom the best smile I could manage. “I just have some things on my mind. Nothing’s wrong exactly.”
She gave me a knowing smile. “A boy wouldn’t have anything to do with what you’re thinking about, hmm?”
My mom was pretty cool as far as moms were concerned, but I also knew I couldn’t talk to her about Bryn. She wouldn’t approve of me wanting to be with him unless he suddenly became a Seer descendent or a Gatekeeper. Still, nothing wrong with testing the waters a little. “Well . . . I don’t know . . . It’s just—have you ever wanted to be with someone that wasn’t who everyone expected you to be with? You know, when you were younger, before Dad?”
My mom came farther into my room and looked at me with understanding. “Oh, I see. You have a crush on someone you know you shouldn’t.”
“Well, not exactly.” I knew no such thing. My feelings for Bryn were too right to be wrong—as cliché as it sounded.
My mom sat down on my bed. “Let me guess, an ungifted human or a Guardian?”
“How did you know?”
She laughed. “Oh, honey, the forbidden fruit is always the sweetest when we’re young. But those kinds of things pass—puppy love always does.”
“But what if it doesn’t? What if it’s more than puppy love?” Too late for the what if it’s more than puppy love part.
“Don’t be silly, of course it’ll pass.” She studied me for a moment before her smile seemed to up in wattage. “It’s about time I start setting you up with some eligible young men, men who you could have a future with.” Oh no, I can’t believe it’s come to this. Eligible young men meant only Seer descendents and Gatekeepers who were actually future husband candidates for me. It was very common with parents amongst our people to make introductions of the kind my mom was referring to. There is even a term for it—Suiridhe; it means wooing—or rather, forced wooing. Somewhere along the line, the younger generations had begun calling the whole process Sudding—maybe because we felt like we were getting hung out to dry after the wash, not really getting much of a say about who we eventually settled down with.
Parents paid attention when couples in my community had children, and they took notes as those children grew up. My mom probably had a list of guys that she thought I should give a chance—literally. Some parents, like mine, would give their children a little bit more say in the process, but when it came down to it, the final choice was out of my hands. Families with the most coveted, gifted children, like Seers, always held the advantage. Bonus for me. So all my mom had to do was start making phone calls to the eligible guys’ parents, and soon enough, I’d have guys lined up around the block to date me, whether they wanted to or not.
My mind flashed to Bryn telling me just last night that my feelings would all pass when my mom started setting me up, that I would move on and leave him behind. Bryn had known it was only a matter of time before my mom started my Sudding. After all, I wasn’t officially dating anyone, and I had just had my eighteenth birthday. “Aren’t you worried about my feelings for this other guy?”
My mom got up from my bed and headed for the door before turning to fix me with her gaze. “No. I don’t worry about you, honey, because when it comes down to it, I know you’ll do the right thing. I’ll see you downstairs when you’re ready.” She pulled my door shut behind her, leaving me alone with my thoughts.
My worst fears were coming to fruition. I was going to be set up with guys who weren’t Bryn, and I was expected to one day pick one of them. An arranged marriage it was not, but it suddenly felt eerily close. The thought of letting anyone else but Bryn touch me made my stomach queasy. What was I going to do? And it wasn’t even an us against the world situation; currently it was just me against the world. I couldn’t even get Bryn to fight for me. That’s when it hit me, maybe if I could do that—get Bryn to fight for me—then at least we’d stand a chance. I smiled at myself in the mirror. I have a plan—finally.
I stood and briefly scanned my purple accented room, already mentally picking through my closet, before pulling my current top over my head and letting it drop to the floor. Normally, I was a bit of a neat freak, but at the moment, even I didn’t have time to worry about a few misplaced articles of clothing. I reached into the top drawer of my dresser and pulled out a Snickers bar from my secret stash. I was going to need some chocolate fortification before I set to work on myself. As I munched, I glanced at the calendar hanging on my wall with September 23rd and 24th circled in purple Sharpie. Not only were yesterday and today important because they were mine and Bryn’s birthdays, but the
dates also symbolized a rebirth of sorts for both of us. Last night at Ryan’s party had changed everything, and I was determined that it would all be for the better.
About thirty minutes later, I made my way downstairs, dressed like I was ready for a red carpet somewhere. I had decided that instead of my normal casual wear, I would put on a party dress; it was a party after all. It wasn’t as tiny as the one I had on last night, but it showed off what assets I had very nicely, and the green glossy material really made my green eyes pop. I also actually took the time to curl my hair and apply more makeup than just powder and lip gloss. I looked pretty damn good, if I did say so myself.
As I entered my living room, all eyes turned towards me, but my gaze sought out only one person. Bryn was sitting in his usual spot at the corner of the couch, a glass of soda in his hand, and when he saw me, the smile on his face dropped. His cerulean eyes roved over my body from bottom to top, stopping to meet my eyes before quickly looking away. And yet what I saw there before he turned was exactly what I had been going for—possession. There was some small part of him that thought I belonged to him, just like I knew he belonged to me, and seeing me dressed the way I was made him actually want to, well, possess. I smiled to myself. Bryn is so toast.