by Rita Hestand
His woman? Where had that come from? He looked at Emma, and the warmth inside him spread to every part of his body, tightening his loins, tensing his muscles, and melting the hardness that had taken years to accumulate.
What he felt for Emma was strange and new to him. He'd never felt so protective, so blatantly pulled by a woman before. He wanted to share so many things with her, give her so much, but he knew he had to use a gentle hand on her. Emma was skittish and like all fillies needed simmering with a slow hand.
He saw Emma's strengths too. She had borne her father's wrath and ignorance with tolerance and understanding that he could only guess at. She coped.
When he found the meadow he wanted to show her, he saw the light in her eyes. No blue-bonnets or buttercups littered the way, but an occasional sunflower peeked out from the roll of the hills and the grassland was plentiful like a thick heavy carpet. She relished the beauty of it as much as he did; he decided when he saw the light on her face. How could a man feel so at one with a woman, he wondered? So kindred.
"I thought junipers grew out here," Emma remarked.
"They do, but we've spent a lot of time pulling them up as fast as they sprout."
"But why? Even they have a beauty of their own."
"Sure, but they also consume the water that's here. I learned that trick by reading some of LBJ's tricks to good ranching. He pulled up every one. A wise man."
Emma quirked her head. "How interesting."
"I thought so. I've always been a heavy reader, when I find the time."
"I guess there is a lot to learn about cowboys. I always thought their minds were on cattle and that was it."
"Cattle, land, and . . . women, I'd say." He grinned.
If only she'd open up to him, tell him her fears, he'd help her solve them, get rid of them.
"So, are you glad you came?" he asked as he spread a blanket on the ground and set the picnic basket to the side.
"Oh yes, it's beautiful. Such a lovely day too. I don't know when I've enjoyed myself so much. Being in the saddle makes me feel young again. But I'll admit, I feel almost guilty for taking this time off."
"Well don't. You deserve it."
"I wish Sammie Jo could be here too." She sighed as she joined him on the blanket and opened the basket.
"Maybe next time we'll bring her along," Deke added getting some of the packed up food out of the basket. Clint had packed some of the left-over fried chicken and home-made pickles, and there were celery, carrot and apple stick slices, along with two generous portions of Emma's apple pie.
He was already planning for the future. It took him by surprise that his feelings run so deep, and so naturally for this woman. He prided himself in being sure about most things, but even his father had warned that women can be different. He'd take it easy, feel Emma out.
"So, why don't you invite Sammie Jo's grandparents here?" Deke asked matter-of-factly. He didn't know how to take this one easy, accept to blurt it out and hope she didn't get too riled in the process.
"No!" Emma responded too quickly, too adamantly. Her brown eyes went to pure panic. Her face turned red, and all the tension that had been gone a few minutes ago, was back in place.
"No, you're not even going to consider it?" Deke suggested gently.
"No." Emma turned away from his probing glances.
"I know I don't have any rights, but what about Sammie Jo? I mean, is this fair to her?"
"What do you mean?" Emma's eyes flashed pain and regret and anger all at the same time, Deke mused.
"Please," Emma said standing up and turning away, "don't ask me to explain this. Not now. Not today. This is so lovely. So peaceful. I don't want to argue with you about this. I'll handle it."
"Emma–let me help. I know something is bothering you. But it may only be your own fears. Can't you share it with me?"
Emma turned to look into his face, as he neared her. She looked so distraught. He wanted to comfort her, tell her everything would be alright, and make it right for her. The last thing on his mind was arguing with her.
A hand reached out to caress the softness of her cheek, and pull her closer. He saw those brown eyes grow warm again, with the same heat that poured through every muscle in his body. It was as though his hand had touched something much deeper than her cheek. As though he had touched her soul with his caring and she understood without words.
The moment was so magical, so mind boggling that all thoughts of the outside world spun away into the clouds, as he felt his body leaning closer, his head bending slowly, his lips pursing just above her.
But just as he would have kissed her, Jim rode up fast and furious.
"Boss–sorry for the interrupt, but we got a fire on the south ridge. It's moving pretty fast and if the wind picks up we'll be in trouble." Jim was out of breath and from the looks of his clothes had been battling the fire for a while.
"Emma, can you make it back by yourself?" Deke asked as he saddled up, all thoughts of emotions erased as though they had never been. His face hard and relentless on the hill above them.
"Yes, but I'm not going back, I'm coming with you." She said so matter-of-factly he almost dropped his reins as he spun in the saddle to look at her.
"Don't be ridiculous, we'll manage. You get back to the house."
"Not on your life." Emma mounted and wasted no time in following Jim ahead of Deke.
"Emma, for God's sake go home. This is no place for a woman," Deke demanded reining his horse beside her. "I'll have enough to worry about as it is. What more can go wrong this summer?"
"I will not go to the house. I'm as cowboy as you are Deke Travers. This place is my home too now and Sammie Jo's and if it's burning I'm not going to sit idle and watch when I'm healthy enough to get out there and lend a hand. I'm going to help. Now let go of my reins and let's get this fire under control," Emma demanded frowning.
Jim let out a roar of approval and they all galloped over the hill towards the grassfire. Emma kept up with them as though born to ride.
The drought had brought more than just a water problem. The grass was pure tinder. Deke had concentrated so keenly on the water going bad, and moving the cattle, he hadn't considered other dangers lurking. He should have had his head on straight, he fussed at himself silently.
Half the men were already there, fighting it with all their might, while the others came barreling in. First one then three, then five. Clint and Jake were on the west side, using old blankets from their bedrolls to shovels from the old chuck wagon. Rusty wasn't to be found. Deke thanked his lucky stars his dad wasn't here. At least he wouldn't have to worry about him too.
Emma got down from her mount and grabbed a shovel that someone had laid in a clearing after exhaustion had taken its toll. Some of the men could barely beat the flames down. It was spreading quickly. Deke could feel the crackle of tinder beneath his boots and knew they would have to work fast and furious to get this under control.
Some of the neighbors happened by, seeing the smoke and immediately got to work helping. A fire could mean disaster for an entire community.
Deke set a backfire and continued to do battle, as Emma worked right alongside of him. Never in all his life had he felt so proud of a woman. He never experienced such a feeling of desire kindled with respect and admiration for a woman, a woman that would stand by his side despite the odds and work hard. Soot covered her face, her clothes, but she was unmindful. At this moment, with soot on her cheeks and sweat dripping from her forehead, and her t-shirt nearly black, she was undoubtedly the most beautiful woman Deke had ever seen in his life.
When she became too exhausted to help, she immediately went to giving the men water from her own mount that Deke had packed. She patched wounds, and delivered shovels that Clint had brought. Denver showed up with Rusty who was nursing a goose egg size lump on his head. Emma washed his wound and made him sit down while the others battled the blaze. It was a long, hard fight, but grass fires were a danger to everyone in the commun
ity and if they didn't keep fighting it until it was out it would spread.
Denver barked as the men worked vigorously. Doing his part, he barked at every new flame and before nightfall, the fire was nearly out. Deke posted several men around the fire and cautioned them to alarm the others if it began to break out again. Fires often back drafted and kept going. It wasn't safe yet, but at least a minimal crew could handle it.
Drained and exhausted, the rest of the men drifted back to the ranch house. Neighbors patted neighbors on the back and smiled wearily for a job well done with a community effort. It was over, one field was destroyed but the rest looked good. Clint and Rusty still had enough energy to laugh and joke all the way home. Jake was his usual quiet self.
Cal had coffee waiting and Sammie Jo greeted everyone with hugs and kisses. Jake particularly took his time hugging the baby and kissing her till she giggled.
"Dada," she shouted at Deke as he strolled through the kitchen door and headed straight for the sink. He was the last to come inside and it looked as if Sammie Jo had her eyes trained on the door for the sight of him.
He'd never appreciated being welcomed home, quite so much as when he looked into the happy little face that seemed to adore him. He rolled his sleeves up and washed his hands, then half turned to the baby and smiled, "Hi sweetheart."
Sammie Jo giggled and reached for him.
Deke picked her up out of the highchair and kissed her, then tickled her under the chin and held her for a few minutes.
Cal had managed a plate full of sandwiches, but the men didn't balk about any hot food. Instead they all sat down after washing up and ate it clean.
The apple pie was finished with a flourish.
"Sorry I wasn't much help, boys," Cal fidgeted nervously as everyone was about to leave the table. The look on his face was apologetic.
Emma turned abruptly about, "Not much help? Why, you took a load off my mind. No one would know what to do without you Cal. Especially me. You took care of Sammie Jo, you fixed supper."
"Yeah, while you were out putting out the fire." Cal shook his head.
"So, we traded places for a while, so what? Honestly Cal, if no one else appreciates you, I do. In fact, I'm not sure what I'd do without you."
"Get outta here. Don't kid me."
"Kid you?" Emma frowned and came close to him, her hands still wet from the dishwater. "Taking care of that baby is a job. I should know. And you do it beautifully. And never, I mean never let anyone tell you any differently."
"Yes, ma'am." Cal half smiled up at her as she pointed a fistful of dishwater at him. "It's nice to be appreciated."
"And don't you forget it." Emma smiled. "Now, I'm going to clean up, and put the baby to bed. I think I'll turn in early. Thanks–for the ride, Deke."
"Yeah, not exactly what I had in mind at the time, but we'll get to it." He promised with a wink.
Cal watched as Emma took the baby to her room. "Now there goes one hell of a woman, son."
Deke nodded and glanced down the hallway, "Yeah, that's a fact."
"So did the two of you have a good time today, I mean before the fire?"
"She seemed to enjoy it."
His father was hinting at something else and Deke could guess what it was, but he didn't want to talk about it. He felt elated and frustrated at the same time. He was pretty sure how he felt about Emma, but he hadn't managed to convey it to her yet.
Something was bothering Emma, and he needed to know what it was. He wanted to solve all her problems. But that wouldn't happen until she opened up.
"Dad, Sammie Jo's grandparents want to see her."
"So–what's the problem? They could come here, and see her," Cal insisted.
"But Emma doesn't want them to see her."
"Why not?"
"I don't know. But she was frantic when I suggested it."
"That doesn't make any sense." Cal seemed to study the situation then added, "Why don't you invite them here. I mean, maybe she's just afraid to invite them, since this is where she works and all. Women can be funny about those kinds of things. But the baby needs a family." Cal's voice drifted off.
"You think I should?"
"If you can find out who and where they live, sure. She'd probably thank you in the long run."
"I'll go talk to her."
"Yeah, you do that," Cal said patting him on the back. "I'm going to turn in, that little rascal can wear a full grown man out."
"I believe it." Deke said with a chuckle as he strolled toward Emma's room.
He knocked.
"Come in."
"Emma. I just wanted to thank you for the help today. I never have seen a woman work so hard."
"This ranch is where I live and work. If it burned I wouldn't have a home or a job. It was just as important to me, as it was to you. Almost–I mean." She blushed.
"Thanks, anyway," he said and came to stand very close to her. His head dipped and his lips brushed hers lightly. He wanted nothing more than to curl his arms around her and hold her until daylight, but he knew better.
"Emma, what was Joel's last name?"
"Collins, why?" She scrambled away from him.
"I just wondered. Sam Collin's boy?"
"Yes, you know them?"
"No, but I've heard of them of course. Owns the biggest spread in the eastern part of the state. Sammie Jo doesn't even carry his name, does she?"
"No. Like I said he left before she was born. He doesn't deserve that or anything else."
"Emma–I think you should invite the grandparents out here."
"No," she practically screamed, pulling out of his reach. She put Sammie Jo in the playpen and moved to get her own gown out of the drawer.
"Think about it Emma. You said you were afraid they would take her away from you. And now I can understand why. They've got enough money. But you are the mother. They can't do that unless there is a very good reason. I see no good reason. You are a great mother; you love her, take care of her, and provide for her. How could they be a threat?"
Emma backed away from his nearing presence. "She nearly broke her arm, because of my neglect. If I were as good a mother as you say, it would never have happened."
"But that was an accident. Look," he came closer taking her shoulders in his big hands and looking down into her angry face. "Everyone on this ranch would vouch for you if it came to that. But you are living in fear. A fear that might never occur. It's not right. Face it Emma. Deal with these people. Have you ever met them?"
"N-no, but–"
"You're a bigger person than that Emma. I know you are. I want to help you but I can't unless you let me. Face this, maybe it won't be as bad as you think." Deke prodded.
"I can't take the chance. I can't lose her. She's all I have."
"Is she? What about this . . ." he bent the distance to reclaim her trembling lips. Cold met hot and for a moment Emma went limp and responsive in his arms.
Deke groaned, needing to touch, be close, and love. Love? God, he was in love with her! Why hadn't he seen it? The realization only made him want her more.
"Dada," Sammie Jo cried out, as Emma quickly shoved Deke away and wiped her mouth.
"No darling, he's not Dada. You can call him Uncle Deke, you can call him Mr. Travers, but you certainly can't call him Dada." Emma responded, looking at the baby with tears shimmering in her eyes. She glanced at Deke once more, "Please, promise me you won't interfere in this."
"I can't promise Emma–I care a little too damned much . . ."
He strode out of the room and down the hallway, his anger following him all the way. He loved her, but she was so stubborn, and so wrong about this. She wasn't facing reality. Sammie Jo was hers; no one in their right mind would even try to take her away from her. So what was really bothering her?
Deke fretted for a long while. Then he did as he always did when someone he loved was in trouble–he interfered. He took action.
He'd track down the grandparents and invite them to the ranch
; all the while bragging on what a great job Emma was doing with the child. He'd make it sound so good they wouldn't dare try anything. And he'd put Emma's fears to rest once and for all. Then he'd deal with his own problem–being in love with Emma.
Chapter Ten
"Emma, I'd like to talk to you, if you can spare a minute," Deke's voice held no warmth. "You know we have a drier."
"I know, I just like the smell of hanging them outside. Besides, once it gets cold I'll be using it. So what can I do for you boss man?" She stopped and turned to face him, unaware of how close he stood. Something about Deke Travers made Emma go to mush just being around him.
"You're not going to like this." Deke began, moving away.
"Oh?"
"I got a hold of Sammie Jo's grandparents. They're coming."
"You did what?" her voice rose with each word as she whirled on him. Fear gripped her stomach, like acid. "But you promised." She neared him, wanting to pound something, wanting to shout, to curse.
"No, I didn't promise. I couldn't. I wasn't thinking of you, Emma. I was thinking of the baby. But you've got to face this fear. You aren't the kind of woman to run from something, you're too strong for that." Deke came towards her.
"How do you know how strong I am?" She flung the words at him. Emma pushed away from him, panic taking precedence. "You had no right to do this. You don't know how strong I am. You don't know what's best for me. Why couldn't you just mind your own business?"
"Maybe I am out of line, Emma. But you should know by now, I'm not the kind of man that looks for the rights and wrongs, but I act. This is a problem for you. I had to do something. You are tearing yourself up over nothing."
"Nothing!" Emma shouted now, hysteria yawning at her. "You don't understand," she said flinging away his support and running towards the house in panic.
"Emma . . ." he yelled, his voice vibrating the walls of the house as he stormed in behind her.
Tears blinded her, fear betrayed her. All was lost. Everything. She'd lose Sammie Jo. She had lost Deke, if she ever had him. She'd have to leave, her mind fastened onto the only thing it could–escape!