by Rita Hestand
"Nah, but it does bring back the time I was in and I remember how I felt. Not having family near can be traumatic when you are used to it." Clint affirmed. "Because of his job, Jake's been away more lately and well, I aim to see he knows we are here for him."
"You are absolutely right, honey. But don't wear yourself out, okay?"
"I promise," Clint winked at her as she left.
He ambled back to the room where he heard all the monitors and beeps going on. Boy that brought back memories. He remembered those beeps. He remembered how lonely how desolate he felt and he didn't want his brother going through that for a minute.
He remembered the bruises and the ugliness of his own accident. He felt the scar down his leg and grimaced. It still bothered him from time to time, reminding him.
He walked over to his brother, stood staring down at him and tears sprang to his eyes. "Man, you know how to kick a guy in the gut, bro. Dad told me about what you were fixing to do, and I gotta tell you, that makes me about as proud of you as I can get. I mean, yeah, we all had it figured wrong. And law is good, but I mean preaching…Mom sure would have loved to seen and heard that." Clint swallowed.
"I want to warn you, you are gonna be in some pain when you wake up, you'll almost wish you were asleep again. There will be therapy. But don't you fret, I've been through a lot of it and you'll make it just fine. We'll help you. You know we are always there for each other. Sammie Jo wanted to come, but we told her that for now, it was best she stay home. But she said she wanted to come up here and do some of her studies so you could see how much she's improved. She said to tell you she needs you and to hurry and get well."
Suddenly he came around to sit beside him and propped his feet up on the little stool beside the bed. "You just relax and get well. Concentrate on getting well. I've read where you can hear when you're in a coma, but you can't talk. If that's true I'll watch what I say, but I want to keep you company. I'll try not to bore you too much. I might get wound up about a bull or something but you can nudge me if I do, right? Well, maybe. I want you to know that bein' here with you, well, I like it. I like it just fine. I'm gonna entertain you with a few rodeo jokes, might even sing a bit. Okay, okay, so I won't sing. But I want to make it clear you are not alone. You gotta be here, then I gotta be here. Understand. Do you realize this is the first time you've never been able to talk back to me. Yep, I like that. Now let's see. Oh….just so you know, I'm going over to Peaceful and take care of everything for you. I'm sure they are going to miss you like crazy there, but they'll just have to come visit. Deke said not to worry about the truck he needs to buy a new one anyway. It was insured."
On and on he talked way into the night and listened to the monitors beeping and watched all the nurses come in and check on him, change his bags out and give him more medicine.
Nearly daylight a doctor came in and introduced himself. He told Clint that things probably wouldn’t change right away. That if he didn't wake up in a couple of weeks then it would be time to start treating things differently. Clint understood. He got all the vital information to take home with him.
Cal came and relieved him the next morning. He was worried, his dad always got a wrinkle in his forehead when he worried too much. Clint wished he could wipe it away for him, but he didn't feel all that great himself. Not yet. But somehow, someway, he was going to help Jake through this.
"How's he doing?"
"The same…I'm afraid there isn't going to be any changes for a while, dad."
Cal nodded. "Samantha's coming by before she goes to work…"
"I figured she would" Clint smiled.
"She's so broke up about it…" Cal said.
"Don't stay too long dad…" Clint advised. "We don't want you in here beside him."
"I won't. We already got it figured how we're going to take turns so he isn't alone." Cal smiled. "Just like you said. And Clint, I’m so sorry we weren't there for you. I wanted you to know…"
"Hey, you didn't know. That was my own fault. I hope you got me a slot in there…"
"Sure, we didn't leave anyone out, not even the kids. You know, the kids are crazy about Jake, and can't wait to come see him."
"You think it's wise?" Clint asked.
"I don't think we could stop them. Sammie Jo has already put her time slot in, right after school, she says, and Clay with her. Little Clint is coming with Abby the first time, the others will have to come with us when we come."
"I guess kids are a big part of our life…" Clint chuckled.
After a day or two things evened out where no one was put out to stop off and visit for a while and the nurses finally got used to seeing the Travers bunch coming in and out. Some would shake their heads, others would smile and laugh.
Samantha went in every day, morning and night, talking to him about what she'd done at their new home, and how she had worked that day and all the progress he was making. She helped him exercise his legs by moving them up and down every day and kept looking for signs of him getting better. But each day was the same. It was heartbreaking that he was so still. She's never seen him this still and it scared her.
Thanks to her mother's great advice she brought tapes of some of his favorite music, and stopped off every morning with a couple of chocolate covered donuts, Jake loved them and from her mother's instructions, she would place them just in front of his nose, in case he could smell and remember the flavor of them.
Selma herself read scriptures from the bible to him. Cal caught him up on all the goings on at the ranch. Rusty shared some of his favorite times with the kids with him, hoping to see a smile on his rugged face. Deke unaware brought the smell of horseflesh, and the aroma of fresh hay being cut. He'd talk to him in low soothing tones and help him move around on the bed. Despite the tubes coming in and out of him, they were able to do mild leg exercises, and roll him over and sit him up every day.
But Clint brought something entirely different to him.
"Well bro, I stopped off at the church and prayed for you, talked to the Reverend all about you. He's so anxious for you to come back, he needs you. He's really looking forward to retiring, but he said he won't until you walk out of this hospital and are on the road to full recovery. I—also got saved bro. Yeah…it just happened. Never was so happy in my life and needless to say Abby is beside herself about it. 'Couse she was saved a long time ago. I don't really know how it happened. I was just there at the church and it was like all the burdens lifted at once. Guess I owe it to you and the Reverend, he showed me how prayer can do so much, and I believe it. Don't tell anyone but I got this whole big mess of people on line praying for your full recovery. I believe it works. And I don't want you trying to prove me wrong, okay?"
Clint nodded. "I'm danged tired of seeing that strange expression on your face and I want to see a smile again. Sammie Jo and Clay…well, they're gonna be baptized as soon as you become a full-fledged preacher. They want you to do the honors, so you see, you've got to put this behind you and get back to the business of living again. You've got a lot to do. Hannah wants you to christen the baby. There's a lot of work to be done, and I've never known you to shirk your responsibilities. Samantha has about got that house looking good, you'll hardly recognize it. The whole congregation went over and helped last Saturday night. So, you owe us. And the only way to repay such a huge debt is to get your butt out of bed. Okay…?"
Each Travers tried to improve the senses by bringing something that Jake could put a hand on, smell, or see.
Samantha and Selma became part of the Travers family. And everyone kept telling Samantha Jake would pull through this.
She smiled and laughed and carried on like nothing was wrong, while with Jake.
Then she'd trudge home bone weary tired and trying to keep a stiff lip.
One day when she came in and flopped down in a chair with a scowl on her face Selma approached her with a frown. "Now what's this all about?"
"He hasn't responded to anything yet…it's been days no
w Mom…"
"All in good time, honey. He'll snap out of this…I just know it. Why, his face is almost back to normal. And the exercises you've been giving him are really helping him keep his muscle tone and circulation. Quit fretting. God's handling this."
"I know you are right, but day after day, it's hard to keep my chin up, especially when I look at him and see him so still." Samantha cried.
"We have to keep the faith, you know he'd want us to."
"How can you be so strong, all the time, mother?" Samantha asked hugging her to her.
"I guess because I looked at death real hard and didn't like it. I decided I wasn't ready to die and God surely didn't need me yet. And it's the same with Jake. He has too much to live for. So much to make his mother proud." Selma smiled and pushed Samantha hair back from her face. "Now dry your eyes go take a bath and relax, then we'll have some supper and go visit him together."
"Okay, mama …thanks." She hugged her mother to her.
But this visit was different, all the nurses were huddled around him and the doctor flew into the room and read the chart. Then he ordered everyone out of the room before Samantha and Selma could even visit.
"What's going on?" Selma asked one of the nurses as they gathered in the hallway.
"Oh…you haven't heard. He moved his little finger…" the nurse smiled at her.
"Oh…did you hear that Samantha?" Selma grabbed her daughter and hugged her.
"Is this a good sign?" Samantha gasped.
"It's a very good sign," the nurse smiled. "I'll have the doctor speak to you when he comes out."
"Thank you," they both choired.
Selma was hot on the phone with the news to the Travers. There were shouts of glee and Selma could barely hear them for the noise.
Sometime later the doctor came out and met them. "Jake is showing signs of coming out of it. He has some reflex now, not to mention he is moving parts of his body around on his own. It's still too early to talk about a full recovery, but it is definitely a good sign. Naturally, he is going to need a lot of rehabilitation, but things are looking much better now."
Samantha closed her eyes and said a prayer, then squeezed her mother's hand.
"I've been in this hospital for over thirty years, and I have never seen a family more devoted to each other than your bunch. I think it has a lot to do with recovery in these cases." The doctor winked and left.
Little by little, Jake began to respond, to light, to darkness, the lifeless look in his eyes began to take on a more seeing quality. His grip on Samantha's hand began to tighten, and even though he still couldn't talk to them, one day, he smiled.
"He's coming back to us, Mama," Samantha cried aloud one evening.
"Yes darling, he is. But you still must be very patient. It won't be an instant recovery. His leg is still bad, he'll have to learn to walk all over again, and maybe even talk. But I do think the worst is over." Selma beamed at her daughter.
Recovery began slowly, with more exercises, and Clint knew exactly how to help him with them too. He'd been through most of it himself. Each day Jake seemed better. And Clint knew he recognized everyone now. Eventually he got out of the bed and began to try to walk, with a walker.
As Samantha was reading to him one day, she noticed he squeezed her hand a little tighter, and when she looked up at him, he was smiling…and crying.
"I—love— you…" he said simply.
"Oh darling….I love you too," she scrambled across the bed and kissed him tenderly on the lips. "We're going to survive this, Jake…you'll see."
From that day on Jake began to talk first, one word, then another and in a few days he was carrying on conversations as though nothing had happened to him.
Selma was sitting with him one afternoon and he smiled over at her, "You are quite a woman, Selma." Jake said.
Selma glanced at him in surprise, "Me…what are you talking about?"
"I loved your reading the bible to me…"
"You knew…you heard…?" her eyes were big and rounded.
"I heard. I couldn't respond, I couldn't do anything, except listen." Jake smiled.
"How wonderful Jake…" Selma shook her head.
"All of you have been wonderful to me. I couldn't ask for a better family, you and Samantha included." Jake responded.
"Well, now, all that's left for you to do is get well, and get out of here. Aren't you tired of all those nurses waiting on you hand and foot?" Selma asked.
Jake laughed out loud, a melodious sound that echoed the hallways.
"Oh I intend to get out of here, very soon. I've got a wedding to go to, don't I?" Jake asked her.
"You bet…."
"I can't wait to see what everyone has done with the house," Jake smiled.
"It looks so grand…"
"Selma, we'd be pleased to have you live with us…." Jake said quite seriously.
"Oh now…that's no way to begin a marriage, with me on board." Selma shook her head.
Jake raised a hand slowly, marveling at his own actions. "Maybe, but there's a room, sort of off to itself, where you can have your privacy, and yet still join us. And I know that as much as Samantha worries about you, she'd be much happier if you were with us. We're family, you know…" Jake insisted.
Selma dropped her head a moment, "It isn't time to worry over me, but I'll consider it."
"Thanks."
Weeks of rehab had Jake sometimes frustrated and sometimes eager to do better. His leg was beginning to mend and he was able to walk with only a walking stick. When he was told of the truck driver he decided then and there that his first visit would be to the cemetery and his next to the man's family to pray with them. Samantha agreed, she was eager to help Jake adjust to the sad news.
"I'd also like to see the young men who were driving the car." Jake insisted.
"Is that wise?" Samantha frowned.
"Honey, everyone carries around certain guilt's. If we let them feel guilty the rest of their lives, what good is accomplished. We have to forgive and forget and move on. That truck driver died instantly, from what they've told me. And it was his time, no matter how it happened. But those kids will go on living and perhaps in jail for some time. Wouldn't it be better to forgive them and let them know that God forgives them than to let them live a life of guilt that could lead to more problems?"
"That is so…generous of you…." She gathered him to her and kissed him tenderly on the lips.
"Don't put a halo on my head. I'm human too. I'll make mistakes along the way, as we all do. But as a Sheriff, I've seen some of these things happen, and usually the ones at fault feel such an overwhelming sense of guilt that they don't forgive themselves, even though God already forgot what they did. And they become worse and fall further and further away from the good life they could have. These boys will probably be in jail a while, but knowing that God forgives and man can to, is a start in the right direction."
Samantha stared into Jake's somber face, "Darling, you are so amazing. Now I know why God brought you back to me."
"Why is that?"
"You make me see things straighter. You and Mom are so amazing."
"Well, your Mom sure is…" Jake laughed. Then he reached for her hand, "So, I want to start planning our wedding."
Samantha smiled and a tear ran down her cheek.
"Hey, what's this all about?"
"I'm just so happy…." She cried and kissed him again.
"Me too…"
Chapter Thirteen
The weather was just turning cooler the day Jake visited the grave of the truck driver. He stared down at the name, the simple stone and then glanced about. A big pine tree stood tall and serene overlooking and shading the gravesite. His frown turned into a smile, as the birds chirped in the trees.
"You're in a better place now…no more hot days on the road. Rest in peace…" Jake smiled down, then turned to Samantha and they walked slowly out of the cemetery.
He was still using a cane, but he stood st
raight now and nothing could pull him down from his euphoria.
He had Samantha drive him over to the truck drivers sister's house and they visited a long while. The lady was so happy to meet him and know he had recuperated.
"Looks like you've decided to stay here in Sweetwater…"
"How'd you know," she asked.
"The flowers outside. They look lovely, fall flowers." Jake smiled.
"Yes, I just wish Rudy could see them…"
"Your brother?" Samantha asked.
"Yes…."
Jake smiled, "He sees them…I'm sure of that."
Then a few days later Samantha drove him to the jail to visit the boys who had been sentenced to five years in prison and were soon to be transported to the state prison. They were all just approaching their twenties and the looks on their faces were showing signs of fear and guilt.
Jake stared at the young men who barely met his glance. One was a red head with freckles, one was dark haired and had a tattoo on his arm, a sword and a cross, and the other was more clean cut looking. They all looked young and vulnerable.
"Boys, I know you have a long time to sit here and think about what happened. Sometimes that can be a good thing. Sometimes that can be a bad thing. But I want you to know something. Something that is very important."
The three young men looked up at him, something in their glances speaking of their guilt and hurt.
"God forgives you." Jake said simply.
The young men stared, their mouths hanging open. Words seemed on the tip of their tongues, but nothing came out at first. It was as if they hadn't expected him to say something like that.
"People can forgive too." Jake extended his hand to them.
The boys looked at him strangely at first, then slowly they shook his hand.
One of them seemed moved to tears, "You came here to tell us that?"
"Yes I did. Because even though you face prison, it isn't the end of your life. And once you forgive yourself, you begin to heal. We all make mistakes in life. We all make them. No one is immune to them. God knows this. But the important thing to remember is that…God forgives us. Confess your sins to him, and he forgives them. When you leave the prison, go with your heads up, your back straight and your eyes forward. Remember what I have told you…God forgives, people can forgive too."