“Are you well?” Charity watched me through wide eyes. “I hope my words did not upset you too greatly.”
I shook myself free of my shame, but only for a moment. “I—I did not know. Thank you for telling me.”
“Poor Dr. Pembroke,” Charity said in a quiet voice. “He has endured so much, fought so valiantly for his family. The inheritance of Brookhaven will not take away the pain of loss his family is experiencing, but it will at least take away all their other cares. It will ease his burden to finally be able to give them what he has always worked for.”
“I am glad he has the opportunity.” My voice was numb.
He must have hated me for all my attempts to take it away from him. This inheritance was about more than just Juliana. It had not been greed that motivated her, nor had it been greed that motivated Dr. Pembroke. They had both chosen to marry for the sake of those they loved, even if they were not madly in love with one another.
That was selflessness. That was sacrifice.
What I had done—that was no more than the ridiculous scheme of a child. I wanted to hide, to run, far away from the mess I had made.
But I could not. I had to fix it. I had to pay for my mistakes with a large sum of my pride. I could start with Charity. “I wished to come today to tell you how very sorry I am for…for believing the gossip about you. I have judged you too harshly. I have judged everyone too harshly. You deserve every happiness, Charity.”
She blinked back at me, as if unsure of the truth of what I was saying. As if unsure of her own worth.
I touched her hand. “You truly do. Please forgive me for being so shortsighted and…daft. I now see it has been to my own detriment not befriending you sooner.”
The rapid blinking of her eyes soon gave way to tears, and she sniffed. “No one understands how it feels to be truly alone, to be truly unloved.” Her smile returned, and I stared at the optimism and joy on her face with wonder. “At least now I know I am not completely alone.”
The broken quality of her voice set my own eyes burning with sudden moisture. Despite the hardships she had endured, despite being so alone, she still managed to smile.
With Charity’s words, I was suddenly aware of the many things I had to be grateful for. I had Juliana, who loved me so much that she was willing to sacrifice anything for me, and Martha, who loved me too, despite my often untameable ways.
Even if Juliana had to lose Gilbert, she still had Martha and me. She still had two sisters that loved her, and she would have Dr. Pembroke, a husband whose character was fully deserving of her, a husband who would treat her with kindness. Juliana had lost her mother, and her father, Aunt Augusta, and Gilbert, but she still had more than Charity did.
Yet Charity was happy. It seemed she had chosen happiness, rather than letting it pass her by. She had not allowed it to be stolen away when life had taken everything else. She had seized it, tethered herself to it, to ride with her on any storm she may face. And she had faced many.
I did not doubt Juliana had the strength to do the same. After discovering what I now knew about Dr. Pembroke and his family, and his motivations behind the courtship, my conscience would never allow me to sabotage it. All I could do was advocate for the future happiness of the couple.
I stayed at Oakley Manor for several hours, idling the afternoon away speaking with Charity. She showed me the house and its many rooms. It appeared larger on the inside than it had on the outside. Before I took my leave, I convinced Charity to play a song on her violin, an instrument I had learned she was masterful with. I listened to the aching melody, the music reminding me of my new purpose.
I bid her farewell, promising to visit again within the week, leaving the house with a long list of new goals and plans.
The first item of business was one that set my heart racing. I needed to apologize to Dr. Pembroke the next time he came calling.
Chapter 13
Juliana gave me a weak smile from over her cup of hot lemonade. “I have always suspected the rumors surrounding Charity to be a sham.” She sat, propped up against a horde of pillows, the skin beneath her nose red and her eyes puffy from her cold. Her voice was raspy, as if hindered by shards of glass.
I had just finished telling her of my visit with Charity the day before. My insides had tied themselves in knots as I stared at the clock. Dr. Pembroke would be arriving at any moment. I hadn’t told Juliana the truth about his family—that was his secret to tell. I only wondered why he had not already told her.
“Are you feeling better today than you felt yesterday?” I asked.
Juliana shook her head. “I feel quite the same. But I am not worse, so I must be grateful for that.”
Her optimism reminded me of Charity.
“Luke has been so thoughtful in coming each morning to ensure I am well,” she said. “I like that about him.”
I noted her choice of the word like. That was a good start, to be sure. “Yes, he is a very thoughtful man.”
Juliana’s eyes rounded. “Did I just hear a compliment toward him pass your lips? What has happened to you, Eliza?”
I cast her a smirk. “I am trying to be more thoughtful, myself. But I must say he is still quite unimaginative.”
She coughed into her elbow, taking another drink from her cup. “There is little adventure to be had in a courtship when someone is ill.”
The door creaked open, and I turned toward it, my nerves on edge. Dr. Pembroke stood there, wearing his usual dark colors. They meant something completely different now, something that aroused my sympathies, causing my heart to sting for his sake. He did not wear black to signify any dark, sternness of character. He wore it to mourn his mother. The comparison seemed to embody all the wrong judgements I had made of him.
His eyes found mine for an instant before flashing away, turning to Juliana. “How do you feel today?” There was no trace of warmth in his voice, just a meticulous question from a physician. I had yet to see any sign of affection or even fondness between them. Both were cordial and kind, but that was where it ended.
“I feel much the same as yesterday, though slightly better with Eliza’s company.” She smiled up at me. “She never fails to amuse me.”
I thought I saw one corner of his mouth twitch, but I couldn’t be sure. “I did not know your sister’s company was so entertaining.”
That was an intentional stab. I held back my smile and stared at him, hoping he could feel my firm gaze on the side of his face.
Isabel returned to the room with another drink for Juliana, and I took that as my opportunity to leave. If Juliana and Dr. Pembroke were to truly get to know one another, then I needed to be out of their way.
I waited downstairs in the drawing room, where I could see Martha out in the gardens, a book in hand. She was so at home here at Brookhaven, so comfortable. Why had I ever conspired to take it away from her? I had been choosing Juliana’s happiness over Martha’s, and that was not fair. I had felt that I owed so much to my elder sister, that I had not been a suitable elder sister to Martha.
I picked up my embroidery, waiting with piqued ears for Dr. Pembroke’s descent down the staircase. I needed to take this opportunity to apologize to him, to express my condolences over the loss of his mother. I needed to assure him I no longer viewed him as my opponent. And, if he believed me, I would issue my official surrender.
Not ten minutes later, I heard his footsteps. I set my embroidery on the tea table before sneaking out the door. The moment I heard his boots on the marble floor of the entry, I walked quickly toward him. “Doctor,” I called, my voice echoing in the hall. I stopped in my tracks, clamping my mouth shut. I had not meant to sound so eager.
He turned, his eyebrows already raised, a smile on his lips. “At your service.”
Why did he smile so readily around me, and not Juliana? If he had any intention of wooing her, then his smile was his greatest weapon. I gathered my wits, walking toward him. “I spoke with Charity yesterday.”
He
eyed me with misgiving. “You did not give her the letter, did you?”
“Of course not. Did you really think me to be so unfeeling?”
His expression lightened. It was strange seeing him without my predetermined opinions in the way. This was a kind, caring man, not a coldhearted enemy. I had not thought it possible, but he appeared even more handsome than he had the day before. What was wrong with me? He was to be my sister’s husband. My brother-in-law.
Stop. Stop, stop, stop.
“I believe you once called me unfeeling,” he said in an accusatory tone.
“I did.” I let out a long sigh. “I realize how wrong I was, and—and I am sorry. I have misjudged you terribly. If I had known about the family you have to support, and the recent loss of your mother…”
His eyes flashed with something all too familiar—grief and longing.
“Death is cruel,” I whispered. “I am so sorry.”
He crossed his arms, looking down and tracing his boot in circles over the floor. “How did you know?”
“Charity told me.” I swallowed past the tightness in my throat. “Why would you keep such a secret?”
He still stared at the floor.
“If I had known about your sisters, about your living conditions, your mother—”
“Then you would have pitied me?” He looked up.
I shook my head. “I would have stopped trying to ruin your chance to have Brookhaven. I would have allowed you to court Juliana in peace. In essence, I would have left you alone.”
Dr. Pembroke’s gaze never left my face. “Have you considered that I might not have wanted that?”
My heart leaped, and I scolded it for doing so. “You enjoy a challenge, then?”
“Perhaps I do.” His mouth tipped in a half smile, still softened from his recent solemnity.
“Then I have a new challenge that may interest you.” I interlocked my fingers behind my back. “You might try to be a little more friendly in Juliana’s company. Smile a bit more. Make her laugh. Speak of something that interests her, be more imaginative and entertaining. I am both, as you know, and Juliana enjoys my company.”
He scowled. “You don’t think she enjoys mine?”
“I suspect she is bored.”
He groaned. “How do you know?”
“I am her sister. I know the sort of men she fancies. If we are to be allies in this, then you must heed my advice.”
He took a deep breath, his shoulders rising and falling heavily as he stared down at me. I felt exceedingly small beside him, both of us surrounded by the lofty, domed ceilings of the entry hall. “You intend now to help me?”
I paced a step away, distancing myself from the subtle masculine scents that he carried. “You and Juliana both feel obligated to enter into this marriage. I have finally accepted that it is in the best interest of all parties involved that you carry it out. By summer’s end, it is my hope that she will not be marrying a stranger, but a man she is very fond of. Perhaps one she even loves.”
Dr. Pembroke’s eyes glinted with mirth. “I still do not trust you.”
“We will shake hands on it. You have my word. I surrender my mischievous efforts.”
“So you admit that you have been mischievous?”
I extended my hand. “Only a little.”
He smiled before his hand touched mine. His grip was firm, but his eyes were soft as he looked down at me. My arm tingled, sending threads of warmth through my skin.
I pulled my hand away, interlocking it with my own again, hoping it would rid my skin of that unsettling feeling. “Juliana loves to smile and laugh. I believe that is the way to her heart.”
He gave a forced exhale. “Is that not the way to any woman’s heart?”
“Juliana’s especially.”
He chuckled. “I’m not certain this is the most proper arrangement, having you as my advisor to winning your sister’s heart. It is highly… unusual.”
“This entire situation is highly unusual, is it not?”
He nodded his agreement, then raised one eyebrow. “Are we to be allies now?”
My pride was still resistant to the idea, and coupled with the pleasure on his face, I could not bear to agree with him. “I have decided I don’t like the word ally.”
He scratched his cheek, his amusement still evident. “Shall we say…we are friends with a common goal?”
A twist on the word ally, to be sure. But I could not deny I quite liked the sound of the word friend. I never would have guessed Dr. Luke Pembroke would become my friend, but here he was, smiling down at me, teasing me, just as any friend might do. But there was something heavy and warm in his gaze that threatened to set me ablaze if I looked for too long.
“That will suffice,” I said.
“Very well.” He turned toward the door. The waiting footman handed him his hat and gloves. He thanked him, rotating to face me again.
I shifted on my feet. “Thank you for helping us look after Juliana. She finds you quite thoughtful in doing so.”
“It is no trouble at all. I expect she will be fully recovered within the week.”
“I am glad to hear it. I would suggest you use the time to learn from me all you need to know to win her affections.”
He placed his hat over his hair, shadowing his face from the nearby windows. “Am I really failing so desperately? You did say she considered me thoughtful.”
“Yes, so you are halfway there, I suppose. Thoughtfulness and romance are like…sisters. Thoughtful gestures, when done right, can be quite romantic.”
By the way he was looking at me, I could only guess he was going to find great entertainment in our new agreement. “I did not know you had such expertise on the subject.”
“I can only credit it to my imagination, something of which Juliana has found you lacking.”
“I lack imagination?”
“The continual walks and rides have grown a bit tiresome.”
He huffed a breath of frustration. “This all does not make a difference, does it? We are marrying for Brookhaven.” He gestured at the surrounding hall. “We are marrying for the sake of our families.”
“It does make a difference. Juliana deserves to marry someone she loves.”
He looked down at the marble floor again.
I knew in my bones that she would never love any man as much as she loved Gilbert, but if Luke at least tried to win her affection, I did not doubt he would succeed. Perhaps it would soften the pain of losing Gilbert. Luke appeared somewhat troubled over my suggestion, more uncollected than I had ever seen him. My words tumbled out before I could stop them. “You deserve it too.”
He looked up, his eyes settling on my face briefly before falling to his hands. He tugged on his gloves, his movements firm. His silence persisted for so long that I wondered if he had even heard me.
After a long moment, his smile returned, mingled with a smirk. “If I recall correctly, the last time we spoke you deemed me unworthy, and now you say I am deserving of love. How did your opinion change so much?”
“I did not say you were unworthy. I said I had not decided yet. After hearing about your family, your four young sisters in your care, I realized my assumptions concerning you were not entirely correct.”
“Not entirely? Which of your assumptions have proven correct?”
“You do have a bit of trouble with your punctuality.”
He cast his gaze upward, shaking his head. “Is that all?”
“Well, you are not quite as magnificent as my Aunt Augusta professed you to be.”
He chuckled. “I am sorry to have disappointed you.”
“No, I am not disappointed. I prefer you this way. I always hated when she was right.” A wistful smile pulled on my lips, and I found myself missing her fiercely. Despite all she had done to complicate our lives from her grave, I still wished she were here. Surely she could do a better job than me with untangling this mess.
Luke’s smile told me he was enjoying this con
versation immensely. “Now I am curious. Which assumptions then have proven incorrect?”
My fists tightened at my sides. Was he truly going to make me say it? I huffed out an upward breath. “You are not a selfish pig.”
His laughter rang out in the entry hall, and I couldn’t help but join him. The absurdity of my words to him that day made my face burn. I laughed until my stomach ached, hiding half my face in my hands. “Let us forget that I ever spoke such words, and begin planning the intricacies of our plan to help you gain the affections of my sister.”
Luke’s laughter subsided, his cheeks pulling as he tried to address me seriously. “Very well. Let us begin, but I shall never forget you ever spoke those words.”
I sighed. “I did not expect you would.”
Chapter 14
The gardens seemed to be the perfect place to school a man in matters of a lady’s heart. Martha was still sitting among the flowers with her book, just near enough to keep my meeting with Luke proper. We could not risk being overheard by Juliana, and Martha was likely too engrossed with her novel to listen.
“Is there anything you would like to know about Juliana before we begin?” I asked.
Luke walked beside me. The overcast sky made it easier to make out his features as I looked up at him. His brow was knit in a scowl, as if he were giving my question a great deal of thought. “I expect it would be best for me to ask your sister about herself directly. At present there is much I still do not know about her.”
I turned to face him as we stopped near a flowering bush. “Then what do you speak about on all your rides and walks?”
“I suppose most of our conversations have involved things unrelated to ourselves. We speak of Berkshire, the estate, our opinions on society, the state of the king, the church…the weather.”
I tipped my head back. “The weather?” I clicked my tongue, stepping in front of him with my arms crossed. “This will be a challenge, indeed. Why have you not spoken with her about your family?”
An Unwelcome Suitor (Entangled Inheritance Book 4) Page 12