by Ashley Nixon
“And what could I offer that would not destroy everything I have with Barren?” she asked.
“Nothing.” Cove’s honesty was brutal, and she felt the blow. “But you must consider that a position such as yours, within so close a range to the king, within range of your father, benefits us greatly. We would know the king’s plans and perhaps your father has more information on these weapons.”
“Do you mean it would benefit you greatly?”
“You can choose to see it any way you like,” he said. “I’m not forcing you to choose this path.”
“I thought you had men in Maris,” she said.
“I do,” he said. “But none of them can get as close to your father as you.”
It was strange to find Cove so matter-of-fact. There were no emotions involved in his plans. He thought only of the practical need to make connections, to make decisions, to gain an advantage, and Larkin found it unsettling. She couldn’t think in these terms because the only thing running through her mind was how wrong this was.
“Of all people, my father will know I’ve lied,” she said.
“It won’t keep him from sharing with you,” said Cove. “He will want you to know their plans. It will be your punishment.”
“You aren’t making this easy, you know,” Larkin said curtly.
Cove smiled slightly. “It’s better to be realistic with you,” he said. “At least you will not walk into it blindly.”
She supposed that was true. “Barren has told you of the brutality of the world at sea, but let me assure you this is no different. Perhaps that’s why I’m so good at it. These people will lie, cheat and steal to get what they want. They will kill you if the need arises. But the most important part of all of it is that we are no different.”
Larkin set her jaw. “And when do you suppose I should leave?”
Cove shrugged. “You will know when it is time.”
Would she? She couldn’t imagine what might urge her return to Maris, but perhaps the division she’d felt between her and Barren over the last weeks was a sign that her time at sea was coming to an end.
The thought made her ill.
***
Barren opened the door to silence and darkness. He found Larkin standing before the balcony doors, arms crossed over her chest, hip leaning against one side. Part of him had hoped she wouldn’t try to argue with him tonight, but he knew that was impossible. They both had things to answer for.
She didn’t turn to face him. He walked to the middle of the room, the thud of his boots echoing in the dark.
“Well?” Barren asked, waiting for her attack, but it didn’t come. She turned her head and looked at him.
“What?” she asked quietly, as if she were exhausted. Had she been crying?
“You’re not going to yell at me?” he asked. “Tell me what a big mistake I made?”
She stared at him for a moment and then turned back to the window. She was staring at nothing. The curtains were drawn.
“I don’t know what to say,” her voice was still quiet, strained.
Barren sighed, running his fingers through his hair.
“Look, I know I made a bad decision, but I couldn’t let her hang in Maris when we have no answers,” said Barren. “It was either that or Cove continues to live with this…thing…corrupting him!”
“I know,” she said.
“What?” Why was there no resistance, no argument? This wasn’t like Larkin. She would tell him how selfish he’d been, how stupid he’d been.
“You did what you believed you had to do,” she said.
“Is that what you truly believe?” he asked her.
She didn’t respond, and she didn’t look at him. Was she resigned to let him suffer in the silence? Surely this was worse than arguing.
“Larkin,” he said quietly. “Why were you in the woods?”
She looked at him, tears brimming in her eyes. “I did what I had to do.”
Barren didn’t know what that meant, but she leaned in and kissed him. She tasted of tears. He wanted to resist, to pull away and demand answers, but need ignited deep in his belly, and he wanted this, more than he wanted to fight.
Barren gripped her shoulders and pulled her to him, closing the space between them. She was warm. Her hands scorched his skin as they moved down his arms and under his shirt. He held her tighter, fingers twisting into her hair. He broke the kiss, breathing raggedly. Everything within him told him to kiss her again.
He watched her open her eyes, hooded with desire. “Please,” she said, “I just want one last night together.”
He couldn’t figure out what she meant or even think at all. He scooped her into his arms and carried her to the bed. She kept her arms wrapped tightly around his neck, pressing herself against him, reminding him that she was there. He set her down and their eyes met. Larkin pulled him to her, and he kissed her eagerly, deeply, consumed by her essence. There was nothing else in this world he wanted more than her, but this was not happening now. He’d made a promise to himself and to Larkin. Things would be different, and under these circumstances, with the secrets he knew were between them, he couldn’t go through with this.
He tore away from the kiss, and stood. “No!” He said. Larkin stared at him, stunned. “I won’t make this mistake.”
“Mistake?” Larkin’s voice was a quiet whisper.
He left the room quickly. It was the only way he would stick to his promise.
They were up before dawn broke. Cove had to make sure Barren, his crew, and the assassin made it to the ship unseen. Once the sun rose, Cove and his crew began preparing the supplies. The scorched remains of Barren’s ship still floated in the water from the fire the previous night. Cove’s ships had not escaped the blaze. Two of them were charred from flames that had been farther reaching. Ships at the main port of Arcarum had been burned, too. There was a common belief that the ships had been vandalized to keep the assassin from escaping Arcarum shores. That worked well enough for Cove.
Surprisingly, the ambassador had been able to convince Matthew to let him leave. He’d had to tell him about the weapons, and he was given a time limit. Two weeks. Two weeks to figure out where the weapons were coming from before he had to be back in Arcarum. The sea didn’t work well with timelines, but he couldn’t argue with Matthew on this. He owed it to him.
There was another part of the agreement Hollow hadn’t been too fond of. Cove was the only one who could go. With Hollow and the others running for elections in Arcarum, they would need to stay to keep up appearances, and most importantly, watch Ben Willow.
“Cove!” he heard his name being called in the distance and froze. Turning, he saw Sara running toward him. Her dress flared wildly behind her, and her hat flew off her head, the ribbon pulled tight at her neck.
Cove dropped the crate he was carrying and moved toward her. He felt awkward—sweaty and shirtless. It was not appropriate for her to see him this way, but part of him didn’t care. He was about to embark on a journey that was uncertain. He was going to lie to her again. He would leave her behind with her fiancé, and when he returned, she would be married.
“What are you doing?” she breathed harshly.
Cove sort of laughed. “I’m loading my ship.”
“For what?”
He stared at her in silence.
“You’re leaving again,” she accused. There was a blush to her cheeks, and a strange anger to her eyes he wasn’t used to seeing. “But you just got back!”
“This is my life, Sara,” he gestured toward the ship that sat so gallantly at port, waiting. “I leave and I come back.”
“No, no, this isn’t your life! You’re different. You’ve changed!”
“How? Because I won’t tell you everywhere I go?” Anger sharpened his words. “I’m sorry, Sara, but I don’t owe you that. I’m not your husband.”
For a moment, he wasn’t sure what she was going to do as hurt and anger flitted through her eyes. It manifested into a stingi
ng slap against his cheek. He kept his head turned from her as he processed what had happened. Then she backed away slowly before turning and running.
“Sara!” he called, but she just kept going. He twisted his hair around his fingers and growled. “Dammit!”
Any other time he’d have run after her, but not now. There were witnesses, she was engaged. She’d made her choice and so had he. He was going to disappoint her.
Cove and his crew finished loading the ship, and when they set sail, he watched as Arcarum faded in the distance, knowing that upon his return, nothing would be the same.
***
Larkin sat on a bed in a small apartment below deck. The stillness was strange after she’d grown used to the sway and swing of a hammock slung from the rafters. On a normal day after having been inland for so long, she would be on deck, climbing the masts to get a better view of the ocean, but this was not a normal day. So much had changed since she’d arrived in Arcarum.
She hadn’t spoken to Barren since last night. She’d barely looked at him. She was both embarrassed and angry. She had wanted one night before things were never the same again, but he’d called it a mistake.
A mistake.
He’d used that word before, when he’d made the decision to kidnap her from her home to lure his brother to sea. She’d been more than he bargained for. She’d tested his limits and his boundaries. He’d failed every time, except last night. He’d had enough strength to turn away.
She was partly to blame for this. Barren knew she was keeping secrets, and he’d begun to build his wall the moment she’d inquired about Éire. She also knew that if she was going to follow through with the plans she’d made with Cove, she was going to have to start building her wall or leaving would prove to be impossible.
Something clattered to the ground outside her apartment. She looked in the direction of the noise and stood slowly, moving into the main part of the hold. It was not unusual for rats to be aboard the ship or for other crewmen to move about making racket, but it had been so quiet before.
She watched and heard nothing, but she caught movement to her right where a row of barrels lined the hull wall. She moved in that direction and almost jumped out of her skin. A familiar young girl recoiled from her.
“Shh!” Sara tried to hush her, rising to her feet, and then she halted. “Larkin?” she squinted her eyes as if she were seeing wrong, and Larkin sort of felt sorry for her. She’s stowed away on Cove’s ship only to find Larkin below deck. Things obviously weren’t adding up in her head.
“What are you doing here?” Larkin asked.
“What are you doing here?” Sara challenged.
Larkin twisted, looking to see if anyone had noticed them yet. She took Sara’s arm. “Come with me.”
Larkin guided Sara into the apartment and turned to close the curtain that served as a makeshift door, not surprised that Sara stood still, staring at her surroundings. She was probably shocked and disgusted all at the same time.
“You are going to want to sit down,” Larkin said.
Sara turned to face her, but did not sit down. Her cheeks were flushed.
“Does he leave for you?” she asked in confusion. “Does he love you?”
Larkin had to laugh. If only she knew the truth. And she would soon. “No, Cove does not love me.”
“Did he…rescue you? Are we on our way to Maris to return you to your father?”
Larkin just stared at her. How was she supposed to start? I was kidnapped but I decided to stay. There’s just a lot you wouldn’t understand.
There was still a lot Larkin didn’t even understand.
“I just…” she paused. “Just wait here and do not make a sound, understand?”
“Wait!” she called as Larkin made it to the makeshift door. She turned and glared at the girl fiercely.
“What did I say about being quiet?”
“You won’t tell him I am here, will you?”
“You can’t expect me to keep you a secret,” said Larkin. “That’s hardly possible.”
She bit her lip nervously. “Can … can you just wait one more day? Until we’re farther from Arcarum? Please?”
Larkin stared at her for a moment. “Yes. I will wait.”
Then she left. She wasn’t sure why she’d agreed to that request. There was a chance she couldn’t keep the secret. Or that Sara would expose herself. But she had a feeling that the reason behind the request wasn’t so much that the girl wanted to be here with Cove, but that she wanted to be far away from Arcarum, and Larkin could empathize.
She stepped out on deck, and the sun was bright. There was such a familiarity to the experience—the sound of the sea, the sway of the ship, the smell of salt water. She looked about as everyone settled into their roles once again with Sam at the helm, Slay lounging in the crow’s nest, Seamus inspecting artillery, Barren and Cove discussing their plans. It was strange to realize that they all had a title, some sort of job they had to carry out to be a part of the crew, but she did not. It was like Barren couldn’t quite figure out what to do with her or perhaps he viewed her differently. But she’d be damned if she remained some sort of figurehead. She’d asked to be a part of the crew, and that came with certain expectations. Like fighting in battle. The role Cove had given her, while difficult, at least gave her purpose.
She scanned the area again, and her eyes settled on the water canteens. She moved toward them. Maybe she could steal some bread from the kitchen. She would make sure Sara had what she needed until she could walk openly on deck.
For a brief moment, Barren’s gaze met hers, and there was something there she’d seen often when he looked at her over the past few days. Distance and longing and anger. He wasn’t good at controlling his features, not when it came to her, but maybe he wanted her to know exactly how he felt. She found herself wondering if it would hurt less if he hid it.
She reached the canteens when the scream escaped from below deck, and her heart fell into her stomach. Well, that didn’t take long. She immediately turned to the hatch.
“What the hell was that?” Barren demanded.
Larkin hurried for the hatch. “Nothing…someone probably fell!” she called.
“That was a woman’s voice,” said Cove, following close behind.
“It was probably the assassin,” Larkin said. “I will check.”
She came down the steps and ran into Sara who was running toward them. So much for hiding her.
“I can’t stay here! There are rats!” she squeaked.
Larkin let her breath escape between her teeth in irritation, but she didn’t have long to be angry because Barren and Cove stopped behind her. She could just imagine what this looked like.
“What is she doing here?” Barren demanded. The anger in his voice made Larkin’s ears ring. She knew what he was thinking: another secret she’d kept from him.
“I’d like to know the same thing,” Cove said and Larkin and Barren flattened themselves against the wall as the ambassador passed.
Larkin could feel Barren’s eyes on her, demanding an explanation, but she didn’t meet his gaze.
“What are you doing here?” Sara demanded immediately. “You’re on a ship with Barren Reed!”
“Do you realize what you’ve done?” Cove ignored her question. “Ben probably thinks you’ve been kidnapped, and everyone else will think you’ve run away with me. What were you thinking?”
“I wanted to know why you’d changed! I guess I have the answer.”
Cove just stared at her. Then he shook his head and turned, moving up the steps and returning to deck.
“Turn around, Sam! Go back to Arcarum!” Cove commanded as he came on deck.
“No, Cove! You can’t!”
“What? Will Ben ground you? What’s a few days in your room to think about what you’ve done?”
Sara glared at him and then slapped him. “I am not a child! And if you were any sort of friend, you would not speak to me like that!”
“What you’ve done is childish, Sara! You have to go back.”
“No,” she crossed her arms. “Not until you tell me what you’re doing here.”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
She spoke through her teeth. “I want you to say it. Tell me the rumors are true. You sail as a pirate. You’ve sworn an oath to the pirates of Silver Crest.”
“Yes,” he said, and moved the collar of his shirt to expose the ‘X’. “I swore to them. I uphold their code. Now that you know, you can go back and tell your fiancé the truth he’s been looking for.”
“You think that’s why I want to know?” she scoffed, shaking her head.
“Someone pull them apart. I’m tired! They’re worse than Barren and Larkin on a good day!” Leaf cut in, covering his ears.
“If she goes back, there’s a chance she will expose you,” said Barren. “Can you trust her to keep your secret?”
Sara glared at both of them. “I will not promise anything.”
“She wouldn’t hurt me like that,” he said. Cove did believe that Ben had gotten closer to Sara to gain more information on Cove, but he didn’t believe Sara would actually talk.
“But Ben would,” said Larkin. “He might hurt her to get answers. I believe that. Maybe Sara does, too.”
Sara said nothing in agreement, and suddenly she was quiet again. The fierceness and the anger that fueled her words had dried up.
“Would you risk it, Cove?” Barren asked.
Larkin watched as Barren suddenly became the mediator of this argument. He never did this when he argued with her.
Cove looked at Barren. “You could be blamed for this,” he said. “And you can’t make another mistake or the Elders will exile you.”
“That’s not a real answer,” said Barren. “Besides, my stunt with the assassin has probably ensured I have no place among the Silver Crest pirates now.”
Cove sighed, pulling at his hair. “What if she’s hurt out here?”
“I’ll watch her,” Larkin said.
Cove scowled and looked at Sara. “We’re leaving for two weeks, but you go back with me,” he said. “God knows what I’ll return to with you missing.”