A Potion Gone Wrong

by L M Gregory

  "Huh. That would be effective in the short term. But word will get out, and people will go around. That's why natural obstacles are usually better."

  The Baron nodded against me. "Usually. In this case, it's even more short-sighted. The Bailiff will have to send your master to remove the troll."

  I whistled. Of course. Blocking trade couldn't be allowed. Not when there was a way around. Most trolls either lived in the mountains away from the other sentients or built incredible bridges where their lust for gold was tolerated.

  None of that mattered. I knew the location of a male troll. A semen producing troll. The question was, what should I do about it? Go on my own? I didn't want to move. I wasn't sure I could! The wonderful ache of my pussy would make walking less than pleasant. Though the day would be very indeed.

  Maybe I could get Anna to do it. She owed me. I snorted. As if. She'd disappeared easily enough. Finding her wouldn't be easy and then convincing her to do it? No. I was more likely to succeed on my own.

  And I had to.

  I had to know.

  Whatever I was, the choice would be mine. So many people didn't have that choice. They were stuck. My stomach fell. Could I do something about it? I'd helped the peasants of my village for years. Apparently, to the tune of hundreds of gold. Once I settled in with the Baron, would he stop me from helping his people. Helping those who felt out of place become something more?

  Well, if he would, I'd do it anyway.

  But first. I needed to milk a troll of his semen.

  * * *

  The Baron eventually fell into a deep sleep. I may have helped with that. With my body, not spells. Hm. Was that better?

  Anyway, leaving Anna's home wasn't difficult once the Baron slept. I found my dress where the servant had put it and dressed. Carrying my shoes so as not to wake anyone, I slipped from the house into the pre-dawn darkness tossing a borrowed cloak around my shoulders to protect from the cold.

  And darkness it was. The night torches had long since gone out. It was still too early for anyone to be up and about. Which made leaving the village easy. Nor was I afraid as one might expect. My magic let me feel for any threats. Given the darkness, I used it judiciously. I didn't need to end up the breakfast of some night hunting monster or animal.

  Also cold. Mornings were still crisp. In another month, it might be comfortable all night, but the spring still had a crispness to it.

  Many hours later, sweaty and dusty, I finally reached my destination. It wasn't hard to figure out. A wall had been extended across the road. In the middle of nowhere. It really didn't fit.

  A huge, dark figure patrolled the wall. Likely waiting for the next traveler.

  That would be me.

  Though I didn't intend to spend gold since I didn't need to cross the wall. Which was good. I didn't have any gold. Conjuring something out of nothing was one of the most difficult of magical spells. Even a little gold would knock me out for a day. That's why I didn't just wave my hand to get semen. Transmuting a substance into gold was a little easier, but the density still wouldn't change. So, most substances became only a little gold. And a little easier didn't mean easy. No. I'd have to do this the hard way. With my hand.

  Ha! Hard way. Maybe I could become a traveling bard if my magic ever failed me.

  Trolls have a reputation for being stupid, almost animal-like. This isn't true and anyone who had seen one of the great troll bridges would know that. They had difficulty forming the words of the common human languages. Not because they were unintelligent, but because their tusks got in the way. For people who didn't know better, this left the impression of a stupid person.

  Trolls were also impressive warriors. A squad of knights would have great difficulty bringing even a young adult down. The older adults forget it. Troll skin didn't feel hard to the touch, but it couldn't be pierced by anything short of a magical weapon or a very sharp sword wielded by a very powerful person. Which is likely why the Baron had gone around the troll rather than through despite his escort.

  No one sane messed with a troll.

  Except a wizard.

  And there were questions if we were sane.

  I approached in the open, figuring that was safer by far than startling a being who could rip a tree in half or lift a boulder. The only bigger and stronger intelligent, bipedal creature was the ogre. And ogres were said to be mean bastards.

  The troll spotted me soon enough and moved to block my way through his wall. The wall, as I approached, showed more of its character. I paused. Despite having to have been built with stone found in the area, it looked like a single block. Ruins and pictographs covered it from one side to the other.

  "Beautiful," I gasped.

  The troll paused. "You like?" he asked in a deep guttural voice. The fangs that jutted from his mouth made his speech difficult to understand, but not impossible.

  "I do," I said. "May I touch it?"

  He cocked his head, studying me. "Don't hurt it," he growled.

  "Never!" I said. And I meant it. I would no more hurt that wall than I would myself.

  The wall felt cool to the touch. Like marble, but no marble had ever gleamed like that. My master's tower was built from powerful magics, but I suspected this wall would be here long after the tower had collapsed into dust.

  "Simply incredible." The Baron had suggested this troll was only a few years into his adulthood. What would he be able to do in a century? Trolls lived for a long time. My eyes blurred just at the thought. I'd seen the troll bridge at the Messing River crossing, built by a troll around a half-century old, that had taken my breath away. This wall, this simple construction, still managed to almost match it.

  Except for one slight problem. Well, two if I counted that it blocked a trade road.

  I traced the cock my fingers rested on. This troll seemed to be something of a pervert. The pictographs were all sexual. And not just sexual, but lewd beyond any other work I'd even heard of. Most trolls agreed to describe famous moments as recalled by the historians in the area. Was this what happened when a troll worked unsupervised?

  Despite having spent the last few days getting thoroughly fucked in many positions and sex in many ways, the lewd figures on the wall sent my arousal soaring. Maybe having sex so much was the cause. I didn't know. Once I returned to my body or decided to stay, I needed to cut back on sex.

  I smacked my forehead. What was I thinking?

  "You okay?" the troll grunted at me.

  "Yeah. Sorry," I sniffed. "It's just beautiful," I said.

  "Oh. Thank you." The troll, which towered well above nine feet tall, rubbed the back of his head. Embarrassed? I hadn't studied troll social habits enough to know. It shuffled in place. "Still cost one gold to get through."

  I snickered. Trust a troll to keep his mind on the bottom line. The book I'd read about trolls claimed they kept their stashes of gold as a status symbol. They certainly didn't spend much in the towns and cities. Well placed troll bridges could rake in huge amounts of coin as a troll bridge held together far better than a human one.

  "I'm not going through," I said.

  The troll's brow wrinkled even more than his normal look. Towering over me, his thick skin was a greyish green over muscles that made Tom look like a wimp. Had the troll been human, he might have been considered handsome. He wore a simple, sleeveless tunic, which stretched to his knees. If he had on anything under that, I couldn't tell. "Not through?" he asked.

  I shook my head. "I came to see you."

  He frowned deeper. "Me? Why do you want to see me?"

  I flushed. This was the hard part. "I was hoping you'd give me some of your semen."

  He blinked. Glanced down, at least he knew the word, then back at me. "You want my seed?"

  I scratched the back of my head. "Not exactly. But sort of. You see, I'm a wizard."

  "But you're a woman," he said while holding his hands in a parody of breasts.

  I sighed. "I am, but I'm also a woman."


  "Huh. I was told human women not wizards."

  "Normally, that's true. I'm... special. You see, I was once a man," I said.

  The troll blinked at me. Blinked again. Then came the inevitable laughter.

  I sighed. He'd stop laughing eventually, so I waited.

  And waited.

  And waited.

  When he finally ran out of breath, I smiled at the troll. "I'm Joan," I offered. Maybe I should have given my real name, but I didn't want to get into that."

  "Torberg," he said in reply.

  "It's nice to meet you, Torberg."

  An awkward silence descended. Finally, I asked, "Do you think we could come to an agreement for your semen? I'm... willing to use my hand to get it. That should bring you some pleasure."

  "Hm. I'll need more than that."

  I sighed. Trolls were greedy. I should have scraped up some gold, even if I had to transmute it myself. But that would have taken time and my master was on his way. I tried what I thought was a seductive smile, but who knows what trolls find seductive? "It's a little thing I ask."

  He barked a laugh. "Not little. Not at all."

  I blushed. "I meant that it won't harm you. You'll get pleasure. I get the, err, substance I need. It's a fair deal."

  Torberg shook his head. "Not fair. I don't need pleasure. You need substance."

  Grr. The troll had a point.

  "But I've never been with a human. Sex with you, and you can keep the seed."

  I swallowed.

  I'd only been in a woman's body for a few days. But in that time, I'd taken many cocks of many different sizes. Some of the orc cocks approached painful. The Comparative Anatomy of Human-Like Species had been brutally honest in their assessment of the sexual organs of the intelligent races. Orcs were big. Trolls, far, far bigger.

  "I'm not sure that would work," I said slowly. "I can use my hand or—." I sighed. "My mouth." I wasn't sure I wanted to try and take him with my mouth either. But what choice did I have?

  The stubborn troll shook his head. "My father spoke of his time with a human woman. I want that."

  I ground my teeth. This wasn't going well. How much time did I have? Maybe I could compromise. "How about I collect the semen, and then, if you are still able, we can... do the other thing." Even Tom, who was my age, had downtime. I could slip away while the troll was flaccid and keep my word.

  The troll nodded eagerly. "Agreed."

  Hm, why had he agreed so easily? What had I just walked into?

  Something huge it turned out. We'd retreated to a small room built into the wall. The troll had created an entrance so cleverly designed; I didn't see it until we walked through.

  Inside, Torberg had a table, chairs, and a bed. All made of stone, though the bed had been covered with fabric and a straw mattress. How would sex on stone feel? I shuddered. No, thank you.

  "Sit," I told Torberg, gesturing to the bed.

  Before obeying, he stripped. Which was good as it gave me time to recover. I swear his cock stretched longer than my arm and thicker. The book had not been exaggerating. If anything, they'd underestimated.

  "Oh, you've got to be kidding," I mumbled. How did the female trolls handle that thing?

  The thought washed away in a shiver of magic that ran through me. I sent a probe out but found nothing. What had it been? Where had it come from? As a wizard, I was sensitive to other wizards' magic unless they bothered to hide it. That had felt like a nearby wizard. But the only wizard I knew of that would be near, was my master. I sent my magic flaring again. Searching for anyone nearby. Hidden magic. Something. But nothing appeared. Had I felt a creature? Some monsters were inherently magic, and they could cause sensations similar to a wizard.

  "I'm ready," Torberg said, leaning back on his bed, his cock sticking up obscenely. His words and posture drove the thoughts of another wizard away. If anyone had been near, I would have felt them with my probes. It must have been a creature that had passed near but moved on quickly. Most of the magical creatures wanted nothing to do with wizards. They would flee at the first touch of magic. It had to be that.

  Oddly—or maybe not so odd—the sight of Torberg's cock turned me on. As I said, the skin color that no human matched was a little off-putting, but otherwise, Torberg was a handsome man. Okay. The tusks might be hard to get used to as well. But otherwise. Yes, please.

  And that cock.

  Fuck me. Maybe I was a size queen, even if the orcs had never explained that phrase. The implication had been someone who liked big cocks. If that was the case, sign me up!

  I still wasn't sure how I'd fit that thing inside me. I shook my head. Yes, I was. I wouldn't! I'd milk the troll and then move on. His cock looked human enough if a human cock were greenish.

  Otherwise, only its size made it stand out. Ha!

  I took off my cloak to use to cushion my knees and knelt before the massive person. Fucking other species of sentient beings was easier if I saw them as people. Which was easy, they were. Just different.

  Such as big dicks.

  I swallowed. Maybe I should have looked for Anna. But that ship had sailed. This performance now was mine.

  I reached out and ran a finger down Torberg's cock. For all my sudden experience with sex over the last few days, it occurred to me that all the sex had been people doing things to me. I hadn't done much except be there. That didn't seem right. From the books I'd read, the woman often pleased the man. Like this. With a finger. With her mouth. Even once I'd read about a woman surrounding a man's cock with her tits! And rubbing it until he came.

  That might be something to work up to.

  I'd enough to figure out, but having been a man—even though a virgin—I had some idea what was pleasurable. Which pretty much meant everything. I should have just summoned a succubus and taken the hit to my soul. At least she would have taught me something. I sighed. No. There were reasons that demons were not a good choice for a first sexual experience. But in moments like this, where I had decided to make a troll cum, I had to wonder how different my life would have been if I'd just summoned one.

  My soft fingers wrapped around Torberg's massive cock. Well tried to, I didn’t quite make it all the way around. Up and down, I moved. But gently, until he grunted, and his cock twitched. It had taken a little work already just to get a reaction. How was I to finish him off? From personal experience, I didn't want to rub him raw. Or was that even possible? A sword couldn't cut a troll. Could my silky hand do anything harmful?

  "Torberg?" I whispered, moving closer to let my breath waft over his cock. It twitched. Hm. So he liked gentleness too. Would that be enough?

  "Hm?" he grunted.

  How should I ask? I wasn't even sure what I wanted to know. I sighed. "If I rub too hard, will your skin get... raw?"

  "Huh?" he asked. Then gaffed. "Can't hurt me. Not without magic. You're not using magic?" he looked at me suspiciously.

  I shook my head. "No. No magic." Sex magic existed, but I knew none. I suppose I could have mimicked the movements with magic. An invisible hand, but that seemed like a lot of work considering I had my own hand.

  "Good. No magic."

  I gripped his cock tighter, but if his skin couldn't be hurt, mine could. I didn't want to go too hard. But I did rub harder. Until bits of his green precum started spilling out of his cock. That helped. And Torberg seemed to enjoy it.

  There was one problem. Now I was curious. Damn wizard's curiosity! What did he taste like? I hadn't done that yet. Not with a human. Maybe I should start with a human cock and not the monster dick of a troll. I sighed. That wasn't fair. Trolls weren't monsters. Technically. They were sapient. Like humans. But my commoner prejudices had a hard time letting that go even knowing the intelligence Torberg had displayed.

  It was the wall that calmed that thought. No monster could have created that.

  I moved in closer to Torberg. He had a strong, musky scent that sent a flare of heat through my body with the first inhalation. Maybe I should let h
im... what was I thinking? That thing wasn't getting inside me! Not my pussy anyway. I'd have trouble getting my mouth around it, but that wouldn't prevent licking.

  So, licking I did. From the base to the top and back down. This finally got more than a small sound from Torberg. He quivered and groaned. His cock twitched in my hand. Now I had him. I licked him up and down while working him with my hand.

  Slow at first. But as his grunts got louder and faster, I moved faster.

  On a side note, I loved the taste! The man had a sweet taste that hadn't been hinted at by the masculine scent of his body. It almost more resembled the brief taste I'd had of myself when Anna had caught me.

  Weird. I'd have to write about that. Later. It would require more research. Much more research. Maybe I'd specialize in sex. Would Baron Sidemore mind if I married him but traveled around fucking other people? He'd implied not. Anyway, wizards were practically immortal. I'd long outlive him.

  My stomach fell. Anyone I loved; I'd outlive. It was why most wizards remained alone. A few gay wizards ended up together, but even that had its problems. Could a relationship be expected to last for centuries?

  I licked through a thick spurt of precum, and that let the painful thought dissipate. I didn't need to worry about it yet. Someday.

  Trying to get deeper into Torberg's pleasure, I attempted to take the head of his cock into my mouth. It hurt. And didn't work. But my tongue caught the flat part of his cock head, and that sent him swooning. I was getting close. I concentrated on the head of his cock and caught his gaze. His eyes were emerald octagons. Different from human eyes but filled with intelligence and need. The need for release.

  So, while my hand used his precum as a lubricant to run up and down the shaft, I concentrated my lips around the head. I even ran my tongue all the way around the rim of his cock. That triggered something. His hip bucked. I continued licking around and around while meeting his gaze.

  He groaned, "Joan."

  His cock swelled in my grip. I kept going. It spurted, I moved my mouth to catch it, that would be easier than trying to pick it off my clothes or the ground. I still needed the semen. Turned out, there wouldn't be an issue with the amount. Torberg kept cumming and cumming. I'm sure I collected more from the orcs, but there had been many of them! Torberg far out spewed any single orc, even if he fell short of all the orcs.