After checking to see that she was listening, he continued. “Then, after Cindy had such a difficult time with April, I moved here. But you know all that.”
“Yes.”
“Well, I made a plan. I wanted to get married and start a family right away, within a year. I’d gotten so used to obtaining my goals in business, I’d forgotten that people don’t work that way.”
“I’ve gotten caught up in work, too, Tyler.”
“But unlike you, I was so blind. See, when you said you couldn’t have any children, I panicked. I was afraid of putting away all my dreams. But now I realize that was wrong.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, if you don’t want to ever have children—not even adopting any—I’ll learn to accept that.”
Her eyes widened. “Tyler? Tyler, are you saying—”
“Please let me finish. See, Megan and April are awesome. I’ll make do with being their uncle. That’s fine. Because it doesn’t matter what I don’t have. What matters is that I’ll have you.”
“Did…did you really say you’d consider adoption?”
“Well, yeah. I mean of course I would.”
A lump formed in his throat as her eyes filled with tears.
“M-Mark never would consider it.”
He wasn’t sure about the right thing to say. All he could add was what was in his heart. “Listen, I know your husband was a good guy,” he said slowly. “A great guy. Maybe he had reasons for never wanting to adopt. But I’m not him. I love kids. Any kids. I’d be thrilled to adopt, if that’s what was in the cards.”
Her legs looked unsteady as she turned away from him. He watched her put the puppy down and breathe deeply. “When we argued…we never talked about adoption.”
“I know that. I wish we had.” He’d been such a fool. Why hadn’t he given her more time?
Two tears ran down her cheeks. “When you left, I was devastated. I thought you’d never want a woman who was flawed.”
He couldn’t help himself. With two fingers he gently swiped at her tears. “You’re not flawed, Remy. You’re perfect. I should have told you that.”
“The truth is…I’ve always wanted children.”
Reaching for her hand, he linked his fingers through hers, searching her beautiful face. “Please forgive me. Please forgive me for not talking this through with you.” To his surprise, he was feeling a bit choked up himself. “I’m so sorry I just dropped you home and let you go.”
“I’m sorry I let you.” Next to her feet, the puppy woke up with a bark, then stretched and explored. Remy chuckled as the black ball of fluff raced after an old napkin, then abandoned it for a tiny twig.
Tyler watched her, watched the puppy and had never felt more at a loss of what to do or say. “Will you take me back?”
“I heard you were dating someone new.”
“I was, but after the first date, I told her things couldn’t work out. I only want you, Remy. So, will you?”
When she still stood motionless, he began to get desperate. “We don’t have to pick up where we left off. How about we just take things slow? You know, meet for dinner?”
“Tyler, I just don’t know if we were meant to be together.”
“I know we were. I know it.”
“I don’t know…”
Directing her to a nearby bench, he said, “I’ve got something to tell you. Something about the real reason I came to Carnegie.”
She scooted away so only their knees were touching. “And that was?”
“One day almost a year ago when I was flying on Carnegie Airlines, I was flipping through the in-flight magazine. Then all of a sudden I saw your photo.”
“What?”
“Honest to God, that’s what happened. I read about you in a magazine, I saw your photo and I knew I had to meet you.”
Surprise and astonishment—and pure distrust—flickered in her eyes. “That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard! No one does that.”
“I did. And I know it doesn’t make sense. But I don’t think it has to.” Impulsively he reached for her hand. “Don’t you see, Remy? You’ve already got me. You’ve had me from the first time I saw your pretty gray eyes in a photograph.” Running a thumb over her knuckles, he gazed at her. “Please, Remy. Please give me a chance. Give us another chance.”
For a split second he thought she was going to nod. He thought bells would go off, fireworks would appear and everything was going to be super again.
But she only sighed. “What you told me, the magazine, the…the adoption…I need some time.”
It took everything he had to simply nod. To let go of her hand. “Okay, then. You have my number.”
For a moment she bit on her bottom lip, studying him. Then she blurted, “Would you like to come over for dinner tomorrow night?”
“Yes.”
“I thought I’d cook. Did you know I can cook?” she said in a rush. “I can. Pretty well, actually.”
“I’ll look forward to dinner. What time?”
“Seven?”
He stood up before she could take back the invitation. “I’ll see you then. Thank you, Remy.” When he turned and walked away, for a second he thought he heard her crying.
But he kept walking. Kept walking and holding that invitation close to his heart. She’d invited him over for dinner. They weren’t over yet.
She wanted a family.
They had a future. He felt like pumping his fist in the air and shouting for joy.
He settled for walking the two miles back to his house and remembering every little thing she’d said.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Do not apologize. Do not make excuses. Imagine you’re at work and in control.
Well, those three statements sounded fine, but as Remy looked in the mirror, she had a pretty good idea that not a bit of it was sinking in. In the mirror she looked unsure, nervous, eager to please and frumpy.
Tilting her head to one side, she considered changing again. Jeans and the white-on-white embroidered blouse were like nothing Tyler had ever seen her in.
Her hair in a loose ponytail was unusual, too. It looked plain and simple. Her flip-flops weren’t very fashion-forward, either. Shoot, they weren’t even fashion-backward.
No, she looked like Ramona Greer. Forty-two years old, and on some days, looking and feeling every day of it.
As Samantha tore around the corner, a pair of Remy’s panty hose in tow, she knelt and started laughing. “What are you saying, pup? That it’s time I gave these up—or that they’re the perfect tug-of-war toys?”
Yip!
Grabbing one end, Remy tugged gently, bringing the little pup skittering forward with a tiny growl. Remy had just tugged a bit when the doorbell rang. “Here we go, Sam. Wish me luck.”
Samantha yipped another bit of encouragement just as Remy opened the door to Tyler…dressed in pressed khakis, starched white dress shirt, red silk tie and blue blazer. Her eyes widened as he stepped inside. “Tyler. You look so nice. I guess I should have told you it would be casual.”
His gaze had to be her mirror image. Dark eyes seemed to examine every inch of her faded jeans and shirt. “I’ve never seen you dressed like this,” he said after what felt like forever.
Though she held her chin up, her toes curled inward. “I…I decided that it was time for you to see what I really look like. When I’m not trying so hard.”
A slow smile curved his lips, though his eyes looked as serious as ever. “What were you hoping I’d see?”
“Someone who is over forty and can’t turn back time.”
“I don’t want you to do that—I never have. I think you’re gorgeous. I like every bit of your years.” Raising his left hand, he handed her a rectangular box wrapped in silver paper. “I brought you something.”
It felt heavy. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I did. But if you don’t mind…would you wait before you open it?”
“Okay.” As Sam
barked around Tyler’s heels, Remy led the way into the kitchen. “I hope you like grilled steaks, potatoes and salad.”
“I’m a guy. Of course I love steak.”
She smiled. “Everything’s ready but the steaks. I thought we could grill them while we sip some beer and talk?”
“Whatever you want, Remy. But if you don’t mind, I’m going to take off the jacket and tie.”
“I don’t mind.” She looked away so she wouldn’t be standing there like a voyeur, watching him remove his clothes. To keep herself occupied, she pulled out two bottles of beer, set them on the counter, then grabbed the plate of steaks and headed out to the back patio.
Just yesterday she and Carmen had nailed up chicken wire on the railing. Now the puppy could roam free without Remy living in fear that she’d slip through the wide gaps.
Tyler noticed it the moment he stepped out. “You’ve been busy.”
“I have. Carmen and I were pretty proud of ourselves, nailing all this up yesterday.” Playfully she flexed her arm. “I’m stronger than I look.”
He laughed. “I’ll remember that.” When he picked up the tongs for the grill, she noticed he’d slipped his loafers off and was walking around barefoot. He caught her look of surprise. “I’m trying hard to fit in today, I guess.”
His self-deprecating way created a little buzz inside her. Things were different. Before, he’d always been so confident. So assured about what he wanted. She’d never had a moment’s doubt that he wanted her—she’d just never been sure why.
Maybe that was why his rejection had hurt so much. It had felt as if the moment he’d realized she wasn’t everything he wanted, he’d dumped her.
Now, though, he seemed far more quiet. Contemplative.
Oh, as he flipped steaks and she served dinner, they were as talkative as ever. She told him about the fire drill at Carnegie and the new round of people she’d interviewed. In turn, Tyler shared how Marisol was liking her new job and how happy that made him feel. He talked about how two of her friends had introduced him to a few more people, and an old buddy of his in the medical center had asked if Tyler could help him hire an office manager. “I can’t believe how it’s all taken off.”
“Marisol thought you were wonderful. You really helped her.”
“I’m good at managing people, and I really do like working for myself.”
“I can see that.”
Pushing his plate away, he murmured, “Remy, what I meant to say is that I’m pretty good at telling other people what to do. But as for myself? I need a lot of help. I’ve made some pretty big mistakes.”
Remy wasn’t eager to rehash everything again. Turning to the silver-wrapped box, she said, “When can I open it?”
“In a minute. I, um, wanted to tell you something first.”
“Yes?”
“Remy, I love you. I love you and I adore you and I want to be with you the rest of my life.”
She was stunned. Barely twenty-four hours ago she’d been sure she was going to be alone forever. That she’d never be good enough for him. Now he loved her. Forever? “What…what are you saying?”
“I’m saying that I hope that one day you’ll love me, too. Enough to marry me.”
“You’re proposing? Right now?”
“Please don’t be scared. We don’t have to do anything right away. I just wanted you to know that before you opened the box.”
“Well, now I’m really curious about what’s inside.” Like a kid on her eighth birthday, she picked up the box and gave it an experimental shake. The contents shook a bit. “I love presents.”
White teeth flashed. “I know you do.”
For a moment she slid her hands over the slick paper, then tore back the wrapping. Inside was a shoe box. “What in the world? Did you buy me golf shoes?”
“No, I did not. Keep going, Remy.” Though his words were confident, his voice lacked its usual self-assured tone. “You’re about to get to the good part.”
When she opened the lid, no shoes were inside…and nothing small and sparkling, either. No, there was only a file folder waiting. Holding it in her hands, she looked at him curiously. “What is this?”
A dimple appeared, making him look more like himself. “Take it out and see.”
Slowly she lifted it open. There was a whole array of papers, some stapled together, others clipped. All looked very official. At the top of the stack lay a pink Post-it note. The following Tuesday’s date was circled. Now she was completely confused. “What is all this?”
Looking unsure again, he cleared his throat. “They’re papers. And the note is because we have an appointment scheduled for next week.”
“With whom?”
Reaching out, he gripped her hand. “It’s with the director of an international adoption agency.” Her hand started shaking as he continued. “See, Cindy and Keith know a couple who adopted a baby from China three years ago. Cindy said they’d done a lot of research, so I decided to call them. They said this gal was the best. She specializes in couples who’ve never adopted before.”
Remy was so stunned, she didn’t think she could breathe.
His smile faltered. “See, I thought we could meet with her. If you, ah, wanted to. And, Remy, I’m not trying to make decisions for you, or force you to do anything you don’t want to…but I thought together, we could just see.…”
Questions piled on top of one another, stuck on her tongue. Breathe! she coaxed herself. Speak! “You looked into adoption agencies? For us?”
A faint sheen of sweat appeared on his forehead. “Well, I called up the lady, who let me stop by her office and pick up all this. I was going to wait to schedule something until after we talked. But she had a cancellation, and her next available day after that was three months from now. She’s, um, really busy.” Looking at the paperwork in her hands, he added, “I don’t want to force you to do anything you don’t want…I don’t want to push.…”
“I can’t believe you did all this in one day’s time. It’s impressive.”
“I don’t know.…” Wearily he exhaled. “Please remember that we can cancel the appointment if you want. Please remember that no matter what, I love you, and I want to marry you.”
“No matter what.”
He nodded, looking miserable. “One day, if things work out, I want to go to China or Guatemala or Russia or wherever they have kids who want us and hold our child.”
“Our child.” She knew she sounded like a broken record. She knew she should say more than simply repeat his words, but her heart was beating so loudly, her emotions were so high, she could hardly process everything.
His expression turned bleak. “Hey, look, I’m sorry. I don’t know why I thought you’d be happy about this. I mean, here I go again, making plans.…” He slowly stood up as his words faded. “Listen, I’ll go.”
“Stay.”
He sat down again as Samantha yipped at his bare feet.
As Remy gazed at Tyler, the past few years spun in her mind. Spun and sorted themselves, and spit out memories. Learning that she could never become pregnant. Mourning for Mark. Working hours and hours of overtime.
Nights spent in an old wooden chair talking to thin air. Watching movies alone.
Meeting Tyler. Sailing with him. Their first kiss. The way his cheek dimpled when he was happy. Making love with him…and then feeling as if she was less than perfect.
And now.
As the silence continued, Remy struggled to find her voice. “The things you said…those papers, this meeting…it’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for me. Ever.”
He blinked, then slowly smiled. “Yeah?”
She nodded. “You’ve given me back my dreams. I—I’d given up on falling in love again until I met you. I’d given up all the dreams I’d had of holding a baby, of going to ballet recitals, of little hugs and bedtime stories.…” Her voice drifted off. “Tyler, thank you.”
Moving closer, he pulled the box out of her hands. Set it on
the table. Linked his fingers through hers. Pressed his palms against her own so that she felt his strength. Felt his warmth.
His confidence in her. In them.
“Remy, do you love me, too?”
“I’ve never stopped.” She blinked away the rush of emotion.
He flashed a smile. “Remy, one day, will you marry me? I promise, you don’t have to be alone. There’re a million guys who would give a lot to be by your side…but I can also promise that no one will love you more. Will you marry me and be my wife?”
With Mark, the proposal had been straight out of a little girl’s fantasy. Mark had presented her with pink sweetheart roses and a two-carat diamond ring and had gotten down on one knee.
When he’d proposed, she hadn’t thought about cancer and sickness and loneliness and death.
But here was Tyler, asking her simply. No ring in his hand…only the most precious thing she could ever hope for—a future.
And there was only one answer to give. “Of course I will,” she said softly. “Yes to you and marriage and adoption agencies and everything else. Because I love you, too.”
With a yell, Tyler Mann wrapped his arms around her waist and spun her around. At his feet, little Samantha barked and yipped and danced on the patio.
In the distance, waves crashed in the Gulf, seagulls flew overhead and a thousand things that always happened—happened again.
While Ramona Greer—who went by Remy to all her friends—finally started living again.
Epilogue
“Are you tired, honey?” Tyler asked as he pulled off the freeway and started navigating the way back to their home.
Her head still resting against the car’s headrest, she opened one eye. “I’m more tired than I thought was humanly possible.”
Tyler reached for her hand. “Just think, in less than five minutes we’ll be home.”
Second Chance Hero Page 17