Then again, if Cherie was carrying my baby, I needed to be able to provide for my child. My child. I couldn’t even get my head around the idea I could be a father.
I knew it was possible—if she wasn’t on birth control. I had been thinking with the wrong head when I got caught up with her. I should have asked the question. I should have taken precautions.
I didn’t and now I was left to wonder if I was going to be a father. If she was pregnant, what next? Would she demand a million dollars? Would she let me be a part of the child’s life? I had so many questions and I didn’t get the feeling she was going to be very open to answering any of them.
I told myself to wait. I had to leave her alone before I made things worse. Vaughn would hopefully be able to give me the answers I was looking for. Then I could plan my next move. Once I knew for certain who was lying and who was being real, I would decide whether I went after Cherie for selling stories to the tabloids.
“Hurry the hell up, Vaughn,” I muttered.
I wasn’t sure how long I could be stuck in the limbo I was in. I was in hell. A hell I couldn’t figure out how to crawl out of. None of my usual coping methods were working. There wasn’t enough alcohol in the world to drown out the pain I felt. There was nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide. I had to face the pain head on. I just hoped I was strong enough to deal with the fallout.
In that moment, with the way I felt, I wasn’t sure I was.
Chapter 36
Cherie
My idea of finding a little peace and quiet at home had backfired. I couldn’t believe Evan thought I was the one selling stories to the tabloids. It made no sense for me to do that. I had ended things with him to keep myself out of the media. He was blinded by his own anger and the giant chip he had on his shoulder. He was convinced everyone was out to get him.
It pissed me off that he thought I could ever be that vindictive. It was insulting. He was the one that was hellbent on revenge. I was trying to keep the peace and he was stirring shit up. The way he had looked at me at his mother’s house still haunted me. The anger I saw in his eyes was so real. He hadn’t even been that angry with Amber.
I took a deep breath, pushing aside all the anger and pain I felt. I looked to my left, staring at the woman who looked to be ready to give birth any minute. She had a serene look on her face. I hoped I looked that peaceful when I was that far along. I had a feeling I would look more like the woman sitting across from me, grunting and groaning with discomfort. Her husband sat next to her, holding her hand and trying his best to offer comfort. He was failing miserably.
“Cherie?” I heard my name.
I got to my feet. “That’s me.”
“Come on back,” the nurse said with a friendly smile.
I was nervous as hell. I hated that I was there alone. I was a little embarrassed to be all alone for my first prenatal appointment. I would have loved to be sharing the moment with the baby’s father. It wasn’t going to happen.
I had gone into the situation with my eyes wide open. I was going to be a single mother and that meant I didn’t get to share these moments with anyone. It was just me and my baby. Tara had offered to be my honorary baby daddy/second mommy, but I declined. It wasn’t the same.
I was shown to a room and left alone again. I looked around at the posters on the wall before I decided it was too soon to even think about the birthing. I needed to ease into things. Despite doing my best to avert my eyes, I couldn’t help but look at the man and very pregnant woman in another poster. The man was looking lovingly at the woman’s pregnant belly.
I realized I wasn’t going to get that picture. He wasn’t the man I thought he was. He was a different man, a man I didn’t want to be involved with. I couldn’t forget the way he had looked at me or talked to me at his mother’s house. That had been painful.
“Hi there,” the doctor said, breezing into the room.
I put on a happy face and went through the motions. When it came time to hear the baby’s heartbeat, she asked if I wanted to record it. I hadn’t thought about it, but it seemed like the thing to do. I watched as she rubbed the device over my belly. The sound of my baby’s heartbeat, loud and strong, brought tears to my eyes. I was surprised by how it affected me. I made the recording, thanking her for allowing me to do so.
I was given some advice about drinking water and staying active. I made my appointment for the following month and headed for my office. I had been sorely lacking in my duties and needed to get my head on straight. Evan was old news. I couldn’t let him control my happiness. It was all about taking care of myself in order to take care of my baby.
The moment I walked into my office, it was obvious the AC was on the fritz again. “Dammit,” I groaned.
Tara was on the phone and rolled her eyes before giving me a thumbs down.
“This sucks,” I whispered to keep from interrupting her conversation and walked into my office.
I turned on the fan, knowing it wasn’t going to do a damn bit of good. I picked up the closest file off my desk and fanned myself. I was going to be miserable if the thing didn’t get fixed by the time I was in my third trimester.
“Well,” Tara said, coming into my office.
“Well, what?”
“How did it go? Did you find out if it’s a boy or a girl?”
I laughed. “No, not yet. I think it’s too early to tell.”
“Are you good? Is the baby healthy?”
I was trying to play it cool, but I couldn’t hide it. I was giddy and excited. “We are both very healthy. I am getting into my second trimester and she promises me things will be smooth sailing from this point on.”
She clapped her hands. “That’s awesome.”
“Wanna hear the heartbeat?” I asked, unable to stop myself. I was dying to share it with someone.
“Yes! Bitch, why didn’t you start with that?”
I laughed and pulled out my phone. I pulled up the recording and held out my phone for her to listen. Again, hearing the gushing sound of my baby’s heartbeat brought a tear to my eye. Tara was grinning.
“Cool, huh?”
“That is so awesome. I can’t believe you have a heart in your belly. You have a little human growing. A little pod person.”
I giggled. “I do. Although going by what I read in the many books, it is very unhuman-like at this point.”
“But it has a heart. When can you find out what the sex is? I don’t like calling it an it. I need to know if it’s a boy or girl. I need to start shopping.”
I loved that she was excited, and it did give me a modicum of satisfaction, but it wasn’t the same as the baby’s father. I felt like I was being cheated. My pregnancy experience wasn’t going to be filled with massages and doting and words of encouragement from the baby daddy. It was going to be me and probably Tara on occasion.
“Thank you for being so supportive,” I told her, trying to keep my emotions in check.
“I am supportive, and I have a surprise for you,” she said, taking a seat.
I smiled, but it was forced. I didn’t feel as happy as an expecting mom should feel. There was a sense of sadness clinging to me that I couldn’t quite shake. Every time I thought about the baby, I thought about Evan. They were linked. I hoped it wouldn’t always be like that. I wanted real happiness. I wanted to enjoy being pregnant, especially considering it would likely be my only time being pregnant.
“I’m almost afraid to ask about your surprise,” I told her.
“We can’t stay in this place any longer,” she started. “This hell space is not an office. It’s a torture chamber. It isn’t good for you or my little peanut to be locked in this sweltering box.”
I shrugged. “I don’t know what else to do.”
“You don’t have to do anything except pack up your desk.”
“Pack up my desk? Did you close up shop while I was away?”
She laughed. “Nope. We are moving on up. We’re headed to a new office. It will be clean and
have working AC. It’s in a better part of town and will ultimately attract more clients.”
“Tara, we can’t afford that.”
“Yes, actually we can.”
“How?”
“That massive bonus Evan gave you.”
I cringed. “We should give that back.”
“Screw that,” she said with disgust. “We’re going to keep that money. Hell, we should charge him more.”
“No.”
“Fine, but we’re using that money. It makes good business sense. A nicer office space will be far more inviting to clients. Honestly, we can’t bring a client in here. What kind of message are we sending? We look cheap. We look tacky. We have to present ourselves as the upscale professional wedding planning team that we are. Clients will never take us seriously if we stay here. We’re going to get a bad reputation. We have the chance to move up in the wedding planning business. We have to take it. Besides, I cannot work for you if you keep me in this box.”
I mulled it over. “You’re right.”
“I am?” she asked with surprise.
“You are. I’ve been looking at spaces. And honestly, I cannot be eight months pregnant in the middle of summer and work in this place. I’m over it. The landlord is never going to fix this AC.”
She held up her hand. I leaned forward and gave her a high five. “Awesome! I’m so excited!”
“Do you already have the place picked out?”
She winked. “I’ll get the lease paperwork.”
I burst into laughter. “Were you doing any work while I was gone?”
“Yes,” she hollered from out front. “I’m a multitasker.”
She came back in with the lease paperwork. “We move at the end of the month. I’ve already hired the moving company. All you have to do is sign on the line and I’ll take care of the rest. I’ve already put in an order for stationery and business cards.”
“You were pretty confident this was going to happen.”
She shrugged. “I was ready to throw a fit if you didn’t agree.
I signed the paperwork, cringing a little at the cost of the rent, but knew it was the right move. We had to get out of the shitty building we were in. I was hoping we would attract new clients that would make up for the jump in rent.
“There you go. I feel like I’ve been ambushed a little.”
She took the paperwork and smiled. “Did I mention the building has a daycare on the ground floor? The kind of daycare that is reserved for employees of the businesses in the building. I will send you the information on it. It looks great.”
Daycare. That was not something I had thought about. “No, you didn’t, but thank you. I guess that slipped my mind. I have to look for daycare. Or hire a nanny. Oh my god, I have so much to do.”
She smiled. “That’s why I’m here. I got you, girl. I got you. I’m going to take care of everything. You relax, try to stay cool, and take care of my little peanut in there.”
She left my office, leaving me alone to take it all in. Everything in my life was changing. I had long dreamed about a new office space and it was finally going to happen, thanks to Evan. My initial reaction was to call Evan and tell him the good news. It was a fleeting response. Something I knew was a habit I would soon break.
It was going to take some time to get used to the idea of being alone. It had become second nature for me to share every little detail of my life when we had been together. We texted throughout the day and then spent our evenings talking about our days. He’d been my other half for a short time, but it had felt like forever. I was on my own and my world was changing fast.
I wanted to be happy about the changes, but it was all so much. I felt empty. Lost. Like I was adrift and sailing farther away from land. The sadness was hard to keep at bay. I reminded myself that things would get better. I would find a new normal. I would be sharing my life with my child. I would be okay. I just needed to keep moving forward. No looking back.
Chapter 37
Evan
I hung up the phone, satisfied with what I had gleaned from the CEO of a small company that was looking to me for an infusion of cash. I had done my research and felt it would be a good partnership. I was doing everything I could to stay focused on work. The more I worked, the less time I had to think about Cherie.
That wasn’t entirely true. I still thought about her and what she had done, but it didn’t sting nearly as bad when I focused on other things, like making more money. In the back of my mind, I had been toying with the idea of what I would do if Cherie was truly pregnant. I would make sure my child had everything he or she needed, including a sizeable inheritance.
“Vaughn is here to see you,” Bonnie’s voice filtered through the phone.
My stomach dropped. “Send him in,” I answered.
It was the news I had been waiting for. At least I hoped it was. It had been days and he was getting nowhere with his investigation. I needed to know who was selling stories to the tabloids. If it was someone in my office, I would fire them and make sure anyone who worked for me knew what happened if they betrayed me.
“Vaughn,” I greeted as he walked through the door.
He offered a small smile, closing the door behind him before moving to my desk. He took a seat, handing me a file folder. “It’s all there.”
“What am I going to find?” I asked, wanting a condensed version.
“It wasn’t Cherie Sanders,” he said. “That’s what you really wanted to know, right?”
I nodded. “It wasn’t Cherie?” I repeated, shocked and thrilled at the same time.
“No, it was Amber. Amber went to one of her little paparazzi buddies and told him you had been cheating on her with the wedding planner. She created quite an elaborate tale about Cherie making the moves on you and threatening you with blackmail if you didn’t sleep with her.”
“What? Where the hell did she get that idea?”
“I don’t know, but the so-called rest of the story was going to be released next week. Amber provided the reporter with just enough information about Cherie to set him on the right path. The reporter took the information and ran with it. He did a lot of digging into Cherie and then stalked her. He followed her around for a couple of days, watching her every move. I was able to confiscate the photographs he had taken of Cherie in Everglades City and here.”
“What the fuck?” I growled. “Who the fuck is this guy? I’ll kill him!”
Vaughn offered a toothy smile. “It’s been dealt with.”
I shook my head. “Does Cherie know?”
He shrugged. “The man I talked to said she caught him digging through her trash.”
She had been telling the truth. “Oh shit.”
“The guy was trying to find some dirt on her. He found a box for prenatal vitamins and a baby magazine that had been sent through the mail. He ran with the idea she was pregnant with your child, hence the story.”
My head was swimming with the realization Cherie had not lied to me. She didn’t betray me. And she was pregnant. “Amber?” I said the name, still in disbelief. “She did this?”
Vaughn nodded. “I had a little talk with your ex. I made it very clear that her attempts to discredit you in the media were not going to work. I also have my own little file on her. I explained that I could very easily destroy her career and reputation in one fell swoop if she continued the harassment. She thought I was bluffing. I showed her what I had. She won’t be a problem anymore. Although I almost wish she would do something just so I could release the story.”
I raised my eyebrows. “You have dirt on her?”
He smiled. “I’m not your head of security for nothing. I have dirt on anyone you have a relationship with. I’m all about protecting you.”
“Not Cherie,” I said defensively.
He slowly shook his head. “She’s as clean as they come. Most I could find on her was a traffic ticket and a noise complaint from about ten years ago. She’s good people.”
�
�Shit,” I muttered, knowing I had fucked up.
“For what it’s worth, and I obviously don’t know shit about shit, she seems like a solid lady. Apologize and beg her to forgive you. I’ve found that with enough groveling and some heartfelt gestures, my wife will forgive me for anything.”
I smirked. “I don’t know. This is a big deal. I accused her of lying. I accused her of selling me out to the tabloids. I wasn’t nice.”
“I doubt you were. You were acting like a wounded animal, lashing out at anyone and everyone. You’re human, Evan. Sometimes, I think guys like you forget that underneath the mountain of money and power, you’re just like the rest of us. You hurt, you distrust, you long for love. Amber set you up. I never liked that woman. She was a damn pit viper.”
I chuckled. “Now, you tell me.”
He shrugged his shoulders. “I’m just here to watch your back. If I would have told you how I felt about her, you wouldn’t have listened. You were doing what you thought was right. Now, you know. I don’t think she’ll be bothering you again anytime soon. I made it very clear I wasn’t messing around.”
I studied the man’s face. He was ruthless. Ex special forces and very serious about his job. He was not the kind of man any sane person would ever go toe to toe with. He just had that look in his eye that said he would eat a man alive if it was necessary.
“What do you have on her?” I asked out of curiosity.
Vaughn grinned. “I made her a deal her secret would stay in the closet. Just suffice it to say I would have had to step in if it looked like you were going to actually marry her. You came to your senses, so her file will be tucked away for now.”
I laughed. “Good to know. Thank you. I appreciate you digging into this and finding out the truth. I just hope I didn’t completely ruin things.”
“You’ll figure it out,” he said and got to his feet. “If there’s nothing else you need from me, I’ll be on my way.”
“Thanks again,” I called.
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