by Mikal Malone
Last week shit changed again for Chris and me when I found out that although I was only fucking Judah on the side, Chris had actually fallen for a bank teller name Lace.
If we wanted to see each other we had to sneak behind Lace’s back. But I’m sick of living like that. I’m use to having what I want these days, and I don’t want that to change. Today I was planning to tell Chris that if she wanted to be with me, she would have to leave Lace alone. The only thing is I’m not sure if she will choose me. And, if she does am I ready to do right by her? I guess I’ll cross the last bridge when I get there.
When my phone rings I quickly answer it hoping its Chris.
“Hello.”
“What up, Vette? How you holding up?”
I sigh. “Hey, Mercedes, what’s up?”
“I asked you first. How are you holding up?” She repeats. “With this Karen thing and all?”
“Look, I told you I was going to wipe my hands of her and I stand behind my word.”
“But you seemed so happy to see her.”
“I was,” I say. “But I can’t force her to want a relationship with me. She acts like living with my mother was the American dream. That bitch was high and on drugs every day I lived with her, ‘Cedes. So if that’s how Karen or Cecil, or whatever the fuck she wants to be called, wants to carry shit, it’ll be my pleasure to stay out of her life. I got too much shit going on anyway. If we are meant to be family, we will.”
“So you came to the conclusion when?” she asks me. “Because just the other day you said you would do everything you could to reconnect with your sister.”
“And I have, ‘Cedes. And now I’m done,” I roll down the window to let the cool breeze inside of my car. “Relax, I’m still the same gangster you fell in love with.”
“That’s good to hear because I was scared at first. So where are you about to go? To meet C?”
“Bye, Mercedes,” I say hanging up on her.
I’m tired of playing the telephone man for Mercedes. I mean I know she wants a relationship with her son, but sometimes I feel like Carissa and her are obsessed with their children. Days like this make me grateful that I didn’t have any children of my own. My soldiers are the only kids I need. They keep me plenty busy.
I shake my head and pull up to the driveway leading into Emerald City. The gates immediately open when the gatekeeper sees my face. I park in the field, grab my red Hermes bag and ease out of the car. I wave at all of my men in position in the yard and on the roofs. I smile when I catch the stare of my soldiers looking at my body. It’s not their fault. They aren’t trying to be disrespectful. This tight black pencil skirt I’m wearing is hugging my thick ass. I know it is because I picked it thinking I was hooking up with Chris later. And the weather is just like I love it. Not too hot, and not too cold.
Coming here reminds me about how we murdered Dreyfus in his own house. I always knew Emerald City would be mine again when he tried to take it from us, and I was right too.
I strut into the community center, and Lil C is already waiting on me inside. You can say one thing for him; he’s always punctual.
Lil C is still so handsome. His brown skin seems to radiate and his curly hair is tamed into a low cut. A platinum chain, with the word Camelot dressed in Diamonds, lay against his black t-shirt. Five of his men are flanked on his sides, and they all give me my respect by way of salute, when I walk through the door.
Lil C stands up to greet me and we embrace. He doesn’t sit down until I sit first. He has manners, even if he forgets them some times when it comes to his mother.
I open my Hermes purse; grab his package wrapped in black plastic. “That’s all you,” I tell him sliding the bag across the table.
One of his men walks toward me, brings me my money, and takes the package back to C. I don’t bother counting his money. Lil C is always on point with the cash plus it ain’t about that with us. He’s family.
He eyeballs the package quickly and hands it back to his man. “Thanks, auntie. We doing good in Camelot so I’m going to have to up my work soon.”
“You’re welcome,” I say. “And when you’re ready I got you.”
I contemplate putting in another word for Mercedes, even though I think it’s a bad idea. I don’t like my money convos to mix with family convos. But since he’s ignoring her, I feel obligated. Mercedes is like a sister to me, and I want this shit between them done.
C is about to stand up to leave until I say, “When are you going to call your mother? It’s time to make good with her.”
Lil C flops back in the seat and rubs his hand over his curly hair. “Auntie, I thought we said we’ll never discuss family over business.”
“Far as I can see business is concluded,” I say nodding at the package his man is holding. “Now give me the respect I deserve, and answer my question. Why aren’t you connecting with your mother anymore, C? This shit is torturing her.”
He sighs. “Because she killed my father,” he says plainly. “And I won’t forgive her for that. Ever. She deserves torture, and more.”
“Lil C, she didn’t kill him without merit,” I say looking into his eyes. “You know first hand how much she loved that man. But he was vile, son. So he had to go. In the end it was her or him, and he lost.”
“Don’t talk about my fucking father like that,” he yells.
I bite my tongue. I want to hurt him, but I try to connect with his pain. It’s hard, if I’m being honest, to understand what the big deal is about Cameron. I didn’t have a father in my corner or a mother. So I can’t understand how it must feel to lose someone who was in your life since birth.
“C, your father wanted to murder your mother. And he was going to do it because she had moved on, and maintained control of Emerald City at the same time. Killing Cameron was the last resort. Trust me. She battled with his death because she knew her children needed him. I know this for a fact, C.”
“Why did she lie to me?”
“Because there were some things nobody could put you on to, because you were a child. Truth be told, you still are.”
“I’m eighteen now,” he says. “And I might be young but I got major responsibility.” He lifts the medallion off of his shirt, and releases it. It makes a small thud sound against his muscles. “If you ask me, I’m doing a good job too.”
“You right about that,” I nod in agreement. “Since you took over Tyland-,”
“Camelot,” he says correcting me.
I chuckle. He’s still the same punk kid to me, despite his height and his bigger dick size. “You got that. Since you took over Camelot things have been smooth. But, did you ever stop to think that the props you’re getting may also be because of our rep? Mothafuckas know not to fuck with us, C. And you know why? Because we laid the murder game down early on, and we continue to do so.”
“And I’m an adult.”
“What?”
“You called me a child earlier, but I’m an adult now.”
“Lil C, you are still a child,” I say plainly banging my diamond-covered fist on the table. “And, you owe it to your mother to hear her out. Call her. Please. You only get one mother in life.”
Lil C stands up, walks toward me and kisses me on the cheek. “I love you, Aunt Yvette. But, I’m a man now, and ya’ll can’t tell me what to do anymore. Since I was a kid I was raised in the drug game. When I should’ve been playing with toy cars with my friends, I was listening at the door to you, ma and the rest of my aunts talk shop. But nobody would ever bring me in but dad. Now he’s gone, and I want to live out his legacy. I want to do him proud. You gotta let me perfect my life, even if it’s without my mother.”
I see the look in his eyes. He’s changed now. And, its only then that I understand that Mercedes may have lost him for good.
****
“Chris, I’m not trying to give you an ultimatum,” I say to her while driving home from my meeting with Lil C. “But I don’t understand why you think it’s cool to fuck me,
and leave me. You act like we didn’t have a history.”
“’Vette, I wanted the relationship. Do you recall?” She says reminding me of shit I wanted to forget. “And, you decided you didn’t want to be with me anymore. So I moved on.”
I’m gripping the steering wheel so tightly now my knuckles crack. When a tractor-trailer almost hits my car, probably because the driver didn’t see me, I remember that I seriously can’t wait to get my truck. I bonk my horn and pull back in front of the driver. Fuck him! I step on my brakes and right before he’s about to hit me, I speed off. I can see the smoke from his wheels in my rearview mirror.
“Chris, we have a past,” I say to her, focusing back on the call. “And I want to see if we can try again. Maybe we can get it right this time.”
“Sorry, babes,” she says. “But it’s much too late for all that.”
I’m embarrassed and broken. My heart is beating in my chest and I feel like a fool for throwing myself out there, only to be rejected. I guess her telling me that its too late doesn’t hurt enough because I ask, “Do you love her?”
Without hesitation she says, “I do. Which is why I’m glad you brought this up. I was going to tell you that I can’t see you no more, ‘Vette. It’s legal for women to marry now in DC, and I asked her to marry me. She said yes.”
My chest tightens and I’m trying to breathe. There is no worst pain than losing the love of the one person who has always loved you. “Chris, please don’t do this to me. It’s okay for you to fuck this girl, but you getting too serious now. Don’t let her take you from me.”
“Naw, you did that yourself,” Chris says. “I’ma always love you though. Bye.”
I’m so mad I roll my window down and throw my iPhone onto the street. Tears wash over my cheekbones and my stomach swirls. I can’t deal with this kind of pain. I just wanna get away for a few days, to get my mind right. Maybe I’ll catch a flight to Cancun, Mexico. Yeah that’s what I’ll do.
I’m sobbing until I pull up in front of my townhouse, and see a red Range Rover parked out front with a white bow on the top. What the fuck? I park my car, hop out and remove the gun from my purse. I don’t know if this is a set up, but if it is, I’ll put so many holes in this mothafucka it will be totaled when I get through with it.
Slowly I approach the truck, gun aimed. When I get to the driver’s side window, I see a letter on the seat with my name on it. I look around to be sure I’m not being cornered again. When everything looks safe, I open the door, and look in the back. The truck is empty. So I climb inside and read the letter.
‘Vette, since I know you don’t accept gifts, this one is going to cost you. Meet me at Sex Under The Sea. You know, the new restaurant surrounded by water. –Your Prince Judah’
I can’t help but smile when I finish reading the letter, and look around my new ride. I can’t believe Judah actually bought me the red Range I wanted. Sure I could buy an entire fleet of these in all colors with the money I have if I so desired. But, it was the thought that counted. Suddenly I realize something. Who needs a dom when you can fuck with a real nigga instead?
****
When I make it to the restaurant, I’m lead in by a pretty hostess with red hair, and pale cheeks. I feel like I’m in an ocean, and the scene is breathtaking. The walls, the floors, and even the ceilings are glass filled with water. Beautiful fish swim everywhere around us, and this is so romantic. I think Judah has outdone himself, until I see the bed in the middle of the restaurant. Next to it is a table and two chairs. They’re the only table and chairs inside here. He must’ve bought out the entire restaurant for the day. That’s the kind of thing you can do when you are a millionaire.
Judah approaches me in an all black everything suit. I can smell the Chanel men’s cologne on his skin, and I melt. He hugs me tightly and rocks me in his arms. Damn, this man moves me sexually. I just wish I could love him, the way that he wants me too. Finally he pulls away from me and I run my hand over his yellow skin. He is still the finest man I’ve ever seen in my life. Thick couldn’t touch him if he tried.
I know it’s wrong to mix business with pleasure, and normally I wouldn’t. I mean fucking with Judah even though he is our drug connect could backfire. But, it’s been a long time since I’ve been in the company of a man, but more than anything, in the company of somebody who wanted me for me. Chris has made it clear that she doesn’t want the relationship, so I’m going to try and live with her decision. May her and her new girlfriend live in rainbow heaven for the rest of their gay ass lives. I’m done with her.
“Where did you get this black dress from? You look so sexy.” He runs his hand on the back of my short spiky haircut.
“If you like this, you should see what I’m wearing under it.”
He winks. “Well let’s hurry up and eat and get this show on the road,” he responds.
He walks me over to the table, pulls out my chair. I sit, and then he takes a seat. The waiter brings out appetizers of shrimp cocktail, and follows it up with dinner salads. For the entrée he brought out broiled crab cakes, garlic mash potatoes and steamed asparagus. Everything was delicious but I knew something was up. You don’t pull an event like this unless it’s important.
When the waiter brings out the Crème Brule’ I say, “Judah, what’s up with all of this?”
“You don’t like it?”
“I love it, but I want you to keep it real with me too.”
He wipes his hands with the black cloth napkin and throws it on the table. “How you know me so well, when we only been kicking it for about six months?”
“Because, we spend a lot of time together,” I admit. “Outside of my best friends, you’re the only person I see more than four times a week. You learn a lot about a person when you remain quiet and listen to them. So tell me what’s up?”
“You’re right,” he says, “and I only have people around me I care about.”
“Judah, you’re scaring me.”
“Don’t be scared”.
He opens a bottle of Pinot Grigio and we drink glass after glass in complete silence. The next thing I know I’m buzzed, and on the bed while he’s removing my dress. When my dress falls on the glass floor, he removes my silk pink La Perla bra and panty set.
Once I’m naked he lies on top of me. I open my legs so he can enter my box, but he doesn’t go there right away. His warm body feels like a heated blanket against my skin, and I love the feeling. I run my hand over his bicep, before scaling my fingers along the muscles of his back.
“Yvette, you’re so beautiful,” he tells me. “Did I ever tell you that?”
Compliments are still hard for me to hear at times. When I was with Thick, he made me feel fat, dirty and worthless. So to hear complements from Judah, and even Chris when we were together, made me feel undeserving. Like they aren’t being real with me. And, more than money I need people to be real with me. I guess I would feel more at home if they disrespected me, and made me feel inferior. At least I know where they’re coming from then. I’m damaged in that way I guess.
“You tell me that every time I see you,” I admit. Since I’m buzzing the water is making me feel like I’m on a boat. I hope I don’t throw up.
“But, do you believe me?”
I don’t believe him, but I don’t want him to know it either. “Yes. I—,”
His hard dick entering my pussy interrupts my statement. He pushes into me slowly at first, until I’m filled up with him. His hairy stomach rubs against my belly. Judah kisses me on the side of my neck, and rocks his waist back and forth. I’m trembling and I lower my head, to nibble on his right shoulder. His light skin immediately reddens and I love it. If I’m being honest I’ll say I’m probably marking my territory. If he is mine I want other bitches to know I’ve been here. I’m a control freak of sorts.
“Judah, you feel so good,” I say pulling him toward me.
“You feel good too, mami,” he says before sucking my right nipple softly. “I love you.”
/>
I don’t know where it came from but it rolls over my tongue when I say, “I love you too.” I guess the dick and the wine was feeling real good to me.
“I’m glad you feel that way,” he says while he was still inside of me. “Because, I want to ask you to be my wife.”
I look into his eyes. He’s serious.
“Yvette, will you be my wife?”
I think about my miserable life for a moment. I’m lonely, and this fine ass man who can have any bitch he desires wants me instead.
So I exhale, look into his eyes and say, “Yes, Judah. Yes I will marry you. Yes I will be your wife.”
CHAPTER 3
MERCEDES
Derrick is in the bedroom sleep, and once again I’m running around with my head chopped off to make things nice for him at home. I know he fucked Bucky, which resulted in me and my friends having to go to court next month, but we’re married, and I want to make things work. Not to mention that outside of Yvette, Derrick is the only one who has a tap into Lil C.
When dinner is prepared I call out into our condo. He yawns and walks out. I sit across from him at our dining room table. He’s reading one of them mind-power books he loves called, ‘The Art Of War’.
As mad as I get with him, I can never understand why he has to be so sexy? Like even now, he’s wearing a white t-shirt, but I can still see the muscles on his chest and arms. Still, we don’t fuck on a regular basis. I can’t even remember the last time I gave him some pussy. I guess I’m not in the mood these days.
“Derrick, can you sit the book down,” I ask. “I want to talk to you. Like a married couple is supposed to.”
He sits the book on the table and looks over at me. “What’s on your mind, beautiful?”
I love when he calls me that. I can feel my light skin blushing. “Have you talked to Lil C lately?”
He sighs, leans back in the chair and looks at the ceiling. “Mercedes, how come every time we talk, you want the conversation to be about C?”