by Robyn Steele
Chapter 15
But I won’t cry for yesterday. There’s an ordinary world somehow I have to find.
~Duran Duran~
I left Cruz at the house and headed over to Nate’s. This was not any easier, even though I had no doubt about what I needed or wanted to do. Nate was happy to see me and greeted me with a hug and kiss on the cheek as I turned my head so he missed my mouth. The hurt was already showing on his face. It broke my heart to hurt Nate. He was truly one of my best friends. Still, it was better done now than to lead him on to believe we could be together.
“How are you doing this morning?” I tried for small talk to start with. “Did you get any sleep last night?
“I actually slept well last night. I was just going to ride up to the cemetery to collect some of the flowers. Do you wanna go?” Nate asked.
“Sure, I’d love to.” We didn’t talk much on the way to the cemetery. I was thinking about how I was going to tell him that we couldn’t be together. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt Nate, but I couldn’t think of any way to tell him that wouldn’t hurt. We sat down by his mom’s graveside. Nate sat behind me and put both of his muscular arms around me. I have to admit it felt good in a comforting way. I always felt comfortable and safe with Nate. He had been there for me so many times.
I thought about the time when I was 10 years old and sad because Lucy Jackson hadn’t invited me to her birthday party. Nearly everyone was invited, including Nate. Lucy had been mad at me because I won the art contest at school and she thought she should have won. I told her she could have the trophy. I really didn’t care. Friends are more important than trophies. However, she was still mad at me and didn’t invite me. Nate had refused to go and he stayed at my house and threw a “good sport party” for me. He brought cake and ice cream and party hats. We watched movies and played board games until late into the evening. We had much more fun than anybody at Lucy’s party. At least we thought so.
Then there was the time my dog smoky had wandered off and Nate helped me look for him. We rode our bikes all over while calling him. Nate noticed something in the road ahead of us and told me to stay put while he went to look. It was smoky. He had been hit by a car and was badly hurt. Nate carried him all the way back to my house and then stayed with me until smoky was healed. We didn’t know that grams and mom healed him. We thought they took him to the vet and they wouldn’t allow us to go. I was so upset because I couldn’t go. Nate calmed me down and waited with me.
“You don’t know how much this means to me to have you back at this time.” Nate said. “I couldn’t have gone through this alone.” He tightened his arms around me.
“You’re not alone, Nate. You have your dad and your sister and all your extended family and all your friends. But you know you have always been there for me. I wouldn’t dream of not coming to your aid if you ever needed me.” I was trying to not mention the boyfriend-girlfriend part, yet.
He pulled me around so I was facing him. “Yes I do have a lot of support, but it’s not the same as having you here. I mean I’m glad you are here with me. You know, back together. Aren’t we back together?”
I felt a stab to my heart and it rose up to a lump in my throat. I couldn’t say anything. I just stared into those gorgeous green eyes looking back at me. I leaned in to hug him so I no longer had to face him and look into his eyes. I shouldn’t hug him, though. That gives him false hope. I couldn’t hurt him! I couldn’t do this! There must be a better way. I closed my eyes and searched inside of me for the answer, but it wasn’t there. I couldn’t take this! It was too hard! I stood up and walked over to Nate’s car. “Can we go now?” I asked him.
We got into his car and drove back to his house. I could tell he was sensing something was wrong. I think he just didn’t say anything because he was hoping it wasn’t true. I wasn’t saying anything because I just didn’t know where to start or how to start and I so badly didn’t want to do this. We pulled up in front of his house. Nate turned off the car and we both just sat there. Finally, I got the courage to tell him.
“Nate.” I had a hard time beginning. A cry was caught in my chest making it difficult to speak. The tears behind my eyes were threatening to emerge. “You have been nothing but sweet to me and we have had some fun times together. We’ve been friends since we were in grade school and I would love for us to remain friends. Maybe it can’t happen now, but I hope it will.”
Nate sniffed and turned his head, I’m sure to hide his tears. He wasn’t saying anything. I know this was overwhelming to deal with just after his mom’s funeral. “I didn’t want to deal with this now, so soon after your mom died. I know you’re in pain from that loss and so am I.” I needed to push myself to go on. “I think you’re a great guy and you’re good-looking and fun to be with. You will find that perfect girl…”
“Just stop, Talli! Don’t say anymore. You are that perfect girl for me. I can’t believe you said that! Just go! Just leave me alone! I really can’t deal with this right now.” Nate was bitter; and rightfully so. It broke my heart to see him in this much pain. I hated having to let him down. I just didn’t want to give him false hope. Was I right to break his heart? Should I have waited a couple of months? I knew I had done the right thing. I just felt horrible about it. Why is it that doing the right thing is so hard sometimes?
Then a thought occurred to me. I had a talent that could help him! I wonder if that would be okay to use my ability that way. I didn’t care. I was doing it anyway! I owed Nate that much. “I’m so sorry, Nate.” He had turned his head the other direction and would not look at me. I didn’t know what else to say, so I got out of the car and just left.
I drove down the street until I was out of sight. Then I pulled over and turned off the car. I called upon the elements of the earth and the sun and the stars. I commanded them to surround my dear friend Nate, to lift his sorrows and bring him happiness, to help him find peace, to help him find true love and to forget his feelings for me. I asked the elements to surround his family and comfort them too. I hoped I had done that right.
Then suddenly I felt a huge burden lifted from me! I felt light and love and happiness. I was overwhelmed with happiness. It was a feeling I could get used to! I just knew that everything would be okay. I had done the right thing.
I returned home to find Cruz sitting on the porch swing. “Hello handsome. Are you waiting for someone?”
“You seem awfully happy for someone who just broke a heart.” Cruz mused.
“I am ecstatic!” I answered him. Cruz raised an eyebrow, eyeing me suspiciously. I continued. “Not from breaking a heart, silly. I used the elements to diffuse his heartache and it filled me with happiness. It’s hard to explain. I just feel so good right now!”
“I see.” Cruz said as he put his arms around me and pulled me into him. “Aha! I can feel it, too! It’s a very strong feeling. I don’t know much about your abilities from your mom’s family. I actually don’t know anything about them except what you’ve told me. I would guess, though, that this euphoric feeling is the elements telling you that you have done something good.”
“I think so, too. I was worried at first if I should use them that way. But now I know it was good.” I said. I was learning quickly.
We spent the rest of the day just relaxing in the swing or sitting in the kitchen talking. Cruz was just getting over his jet lag. The time difference really played havoc on him. Then after dinner we took a drive down town and decided to go to the movies. The new Stephanie Meyers movie was playing. I had read the book and was dying to see the movie. It was nice to get back to some normalcy, whatever that may be for me.
“That was better than I expected.” Cruz said as we were leaving the movie.
“It was fantastic!” I argued. “I loved the book so I knew I would like the movie. But I l
oved it!”
“I liked it a lot too. I just meant that alien movies usually don’t excite me. This one was different. It was really good.” He responded.
“I agree. I don’t normally like alien movies either. Thanks for bringing me here. This was nice to get out and do something fun for a change. I guess we are the aliens, huh? I just realized, that’s why you don’t like alien movies.”
“Yup. It’s weird to see what people’s perception of aliens are. Like they use monsters to portray aliens, or life from other worlds. When here we are. We are just the same as they are, in looks any way. Although the aliens in the Stephanie Meyers movie were supposedly monster-looking, they didn’t look like monsters because they were in their hosts’ bodies. So it didn’t bother me like it usually does. And I like how the alien in her movie had compassion and ‘human’ feelings.”
“Ya, I can see that now. We aren’t monsters. We’re just people. We have feelings and emotions just like Earth people.” I agreed. My world was definitely anything but ordinary. Ordinary as I used to know it. This was my new ordinary life and I was liking it more and more.
The next day Cruz and I took skateboards to the skate park. This had never been so easy for me to do. My newfound abilities were coming in handy for a lot of things. Cruz and I raced around the skate park, flying over the jumps and up the half pipe. There were some kids there who were totally amazed at how well we could skate because they had never seen us there before. We impressed them with our skills and speed and strength. We weren’t trying to show off. In fact we were trying not to show off. However, that was going to take some practice.
One day momma and I put our vegetable garden in. We tilled the spot and prepared it. Then we put the vegetables in. Then we held hands and summoned the elements to nourish and protect the plants. Cruz gave support from the sidelines. We set up a drip system on a timer to water the plants while we were in Italy. Then momma asked Mr. Broadwell to keep an eye on them for us. This was my first lesson in using my talents to produce a garden. Momma said I did well. I felt good about it.
We spent a full week just relaxing and spending time together, getting to know each other. The more I got to know Cruz, the more I liked him. When we were downloading music we discovered that we liked a lot of the same music. We both liked Muse and Lifehouse and other artists. We also learned that we both like to hike and blade and swim. Spending time with him was definitely rewarding. Cruz had never been camping and since it was one of my favorite past-times, we made plans to do that as soon as we rescued my dad. We also spent time planning our mission in between having fun. Then it was time to go back to Italy. So we headed back to our villa, along with momma and my grandparents.