“I do. I have a feeling my daughter may need me now.”
Marisa grabbed her hand. “Thanks, Shana. You have no idea how much I needed this.”
She smiled, reaching into her handbag for a business card. “It was my pleasure. Don’t hesitate to call if you ever need to talk.” Shana took a few steps and stopped in front of Luc. “How’s my baby?”
Luc smiled. “I think she’s gonna be okay. You did an amazing job with her, Shana.”
She reached up to brush a kiss across his cheek. “Thanks, Luc. You’ll let us know when you’ve made the arrangements for your dad? We want to pay our respects.” She handed him a business card.
“Of course. Thanks for coming.”
She smiled as she brushed past him.
He stood rooted to the spot and raised his hands, palms up. “I wanted to talk, but I have no idea what to say to you right now.”
“There’s nothing left to say, Luc.”
He claimed the seat Shana vacated. “Don’t say that, honey.” He grabbed her hands in both of his. “I know I screwed up. I know I should have told you about Nikki, but I was afraid you’d think less of me.”
She looked at their joined hands. “That’s not the real reason, is it?”
“What do you mean?”
She looked him in the eye. “I think you were afraid I’d see you for who you really are.”
He wrapped his hands around her wrists, brushing his thumbs across her pulse point. “What are you talking about?”
“You’ve been telling me all along that you weren’t cut out for marriage and kids. I didn’t want to believe it then, but I do now.” She withdrew her hands, sitting back in her chair. “I see everything clearly now, Luc.”
He leaned forward, trying to reach out to her. “No, you don’t. I’ve made mistakes, I get that...”
She stood up, settling her purse over her shoulder. “You’re not the only one.”
He reached up to grab her hand, his eyes pleading. “Don’t do this, please, don’t go,” he whispered.
“I have to. It’s time for me to face the truth about you and about us.”
Chapter Fifteen
Luc pressed his hand against the closed lid of his father’s casket, saying a silent prayer that he find peace in his eternal resting place.
His mother, Evelyn Spencer, came up behind him, placing her hand on his back. “Are you okay, son?”
He turned to face her, barely recognizing the woman who stood beside him. She was still lovely, but looked more mature and refined than he remembered. Her dark hair was cut in a chic, layered bob and naturally streaked with silver. She’d traded the flamboyant designer clothing she used to favor for a classic black suit. He sensed her transformation went beyond her appearance. She seemed to be a different person from the inside out. She seemed at peace, perhaps for the first time in her life.
Luc felt compelled to hug her. “I’m okay. Thanks for coming, Mom.”
She patted his back before withdrawing from his embrace to look him in the eye. “I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you, whenever you need me. I know I wasn’t the best mother when you were growing up, but I love you, Luc, more than you’ll ever know.”
He brushed a kiss across her cheek. “I know, Mom. Lord knows I haven’t been the best son, either. Maybe we both need a do-over.”
She smiled and took his hand. “Come and sit with me before everyone starts to arrive, honey.”
Luc claimed a chair in the front row and stared at the huge, gold-framed photo of his father. It depicted him as Luc wanted to remember him: strong, powerful, in control. “I’m glad I got to see Dad before...”
His mother squeezed his hand. “I know your father wanted to make up for the past more than anything; so do I.”
Luc looked at his mother. “Nikki said you and Dad were on friendly terms. Is that true?”
She chuckled and shook her head. “Ironic, isn’t it? We hated each other while we were married, yet we learned to like each other once we divorced.”
He recalled the bitterness and animosity that plagued their relationship. He couldn’t imagine his parents ever finding common ground. “How did that happen?”
She smiled and patted his knee. “We have your beautiful daughter to thank for that. When she reached out to us, we realized we had an opportunity to make up for some of the mistakes we made with you. We had a chance to be grandparents Nikki could learn to love and respect.” She gripped his hand. “We may not have been the best parents, but I think your dad and I found a way to be good grandparents. That became our common ground and the basis for a nice friendship.”
Luc kissed the back of her hand. “I can’t thank you enough for being there for my daughter. I wish I’d been man enough to do the same.”
Evelyn smiled. “It’s not too late for you to build a relationship with your daughter, Luc.”
“You really think so?”
She leaned her head against his shoulder. “I know so.” She tilted her head to look him in the eye. “Do you think it’s too late for us?”
For the first time, he saw his mother, who had always been a formidable presence in his life, as someone who was vulnerable and feared rejection as much as he did. He leaned over to kiss her forehead. “You’re right; it’s never too late to make up for lost time, Mom.”
“You seem out of sorts. Is that because of your father’s death, or is something else bothering you?”
He had never confided in his mother, never felt she cared enough to want to help him work through his problems, but if he expected to forge a relationship with his daughter, he had to give his mother the same opportunity.
He sighed and dropped his head in his hands. “To tell you the truth, it feels like everything is falling apart.”
She stroked his back. “If you’d like to talk about it, I’m here to listen.”
“There’s this woman...”
She smiled. “I had a feeling it may have something to do with a young lady. Tell me about her.”
Luc smiled. “She’s amazing. Gorgeous, talented, intelligent...”
“Does she have a name?”
“Marisa Turner.”
Evelyn smiled. “Ah, Trey’s sister. I think you mentioned her once or twice when we spoke on the phone. You two seemed quite serious for a time, weren’t you?”
Luc shook his head. “Not as serious as she wanted.”
She clasped her hands in her lap. “Am I to assume she gave you an ultimatum?”
He replayed the night of their break-up in his head, feeling the weight of her anguish as he had that night. “Something like that. Anyways, I thought we were gonna be able to work things out, but...” He hesitated, unable to admit that he was at fault, yet again.
“But what? What happened, sweetheart?” Evelyn whispered.
“She met Nikki at the hospital.”
Evelyn sighed. “You failed to tell her you had a daughter?”
He shook his head. “The reason we broke up was because I didn’t want to get married or have children and she did. Once she learned about Nikki, I think she realized she could never trust me to be the kind of father she needed me to be, even if I was willing.” It hurt him to admit that he wasn’t someone Marisa could count on. He wanted to be the man she needed, more than anything.
Evelyn stroked his back. “I’m sorry, son. I wish I could offer you some words of wisdom, but it doesn’t sound like you and this young lady want the same things out of life. If you remain together, one or both of you would have to compromise, and take it from someone who knows, that never works.”
He considered his mother’s words. “I think I may have been wrong, Mom.”
“What do you mean?”
He knew it would hurt her to hear that she was part of the reason he feared making that kind of commitment, but in the interest of rebuilding their relationship, he owed it to them both to be honest.
“I was afraid I was too selfish to be a good dad. For so many years
, my career was the only thing that mattered, and I was afraid that having a wife and kid might hold me back. More importantly, I was afraid of letting them down.”
She nodded. “You were afraid of being the kind of parents we were, too selfish to notice that we were destroying our own child with our hatred and resentment towards each other.”
He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t deny it, but acknowledging it seemed cruel. They were human, they made mistakes, as he had.
“You’re a good man, Luc. I have no doubt you’d be a good father if you gave yourself the chance. Not being a part of your daughter’s life is hurting her more than any mistakes you might make with her.”
Luc knew that was true. He needed to face his fears and earn the right to be the kind of father his daughter deserved. “I’m really gonna try, Mom. Maybe you could help bridge the gap with Nikki?”
“I’ll do whatever I can, honey. Maybe once Marisa sees that you’re making an effort with Nikki, she’ll change her mind and give you a chance to prove that you can be the man she needs.”
He put his arm around his mother. “I sure hope so, ‘cause I can’t imagine my life without her.”
She smiled and patted his knee as they settled into their respective armchairs. She stared at the picture of her former husband. “He was the love of my life, you know.”
Luc squeezed her shoulder. “I’m glad you two made peace.”
A tear slid down her cheek. “He was the most stubborn, opinionated, domineering man I’ve ever met in my life.”
Luc chuckled. “Like father, like son, huh?”
She looked up at him. “You inherited the best of your father. You know that, don’t you?”
Luc shrugged. He’d always been afraid to acknowledge any similarities between them.
“You have his tenacity and his spirit. He was so strong, so determined, just like you.”
“Being married to a man like that couldn’t have been easy.”
She shook her head. “No, it was never easy, but I wouldn’t have traded that experience for anything.”
“Really?”
“I never once regretted marrying your father, Luc.”
“I’m surprised to hear you say that.”
She smiled and kissed his cheek. “That union gave me the best thing that’s ever happened to me in my life: you.”
Marisa was grateful Trey suggested they take the limousine to the funeral so they could travel as a group. She knew she was going to need her family and friends’ support today.
The days since she’d learned about Luc’s daughter were difficult, to say the least. He’d called, texted, and sent flowers in his bid for forgiveness, but she hadn’t responded. Fortunately, he’d been too busy making arrangements for his father’s service to stop by in person, but she knew she would have to face him today.
She fought an internal battle for days. She wanted to be there for Luc, to support him during one of the most difficult times of his life, but doing so would only invite him back into her life, and she couldn’t risk that. It was over, she had accepted that, but she knew seeing him would still hurt and remind her of what could have been.
“I’m surprised Luc decided to have the service in Nashville,” Lexi said. “Why not have a small service in Florida, with just a few close friends and immediate family?”
“Luc’s family lived in Nashville while he was growing up; this was his father’s home,” Josh said.
“Still, given Luc’s strained relationship with his parents, I’m surprised he would go to the trouble of arranging a big service,” Lexi said.
“His father was a powerful man in this state, Lexi. Hell, so is Luc,” Trey said. “A lot people wanna pay their respects. I think Luc felt he owed it to his dad to allow his friends and family to pay tribute to him. I’m glad he decided to do this; I think he would have regretted it if he’d taken the easy way out.”
Lexi nodded. “I guess you’re right.” She looked at Marisa. “You okay, honey? You’ve been pretty quiet.”
“Yeah, I guess I’m just tired.” She turned to Trey. “Are Mama and Daddy gonna be at the service?”
“Yeah, I offered to pick them up, but Dad said they’d meet us there.”
Avery shifted in her seat. “I’ve been hounded by the press ever since Mr. Spencer’s death.
They’ve been digging into Luc’s relationship with his father and they smell a scandal.” She rolled her eyes. “They’re worse than sharks that smell blood in the water.” She looked at Trey. “I’ve managed to hold them off so far, but you know they’re gonna find a way in to the service and reception today. I don’t want Luc to be bombarded at a time like this.”
“Luc said he hired private security,” Josh said. “I’ll speak to them before we go in, ask them to keep an eye out for cameras, digital recording devices, phones, whatever. If they see anyone recording the service, I’ll make sure they’re escorted out, quietly and discreetly.”
“Thanks, Josh,” Avery said. “I’m sure Luc would appreciate that.”
“I feel bad for Luc,” Sierra said, glancing at her sister. “He was devastated when he learned about his father’s condition. I think he’s dealing with a lot of guilt right now, about a lot of things.”
Luc asked Trey to fill his friends in about the situation with his daughter, so they wouldn’t be blind-sided when they met her at the funeral.
Josh shook his head. “I still can’t believe Luc had a daughter he didn’t tell us about,” Josh said.
“Speaking of Nikki, I’m sure she’ll be there today,” Avery said. “Wait ‘til our friends in the press catch wind of that little secret. It’ll be a goddamn free for all.”
“I hope not,” Marisa said, sighing. “She’s already devastated about losing her grandfather. The last thing she needs is to deal with a lot of difficult questions about her relationship with her father.”
“Relationship?” Avery asked. “Don’t you mean lack thereof?”
They pulled up to the curb in front of the impressive church. “Wow,” Josh said, whistling. “Look at this crowd.”
Hundreds of people milled about in front of the church and on the sidewalks, and uniformed policemen directed traffic for cars seeking parking spots in the lots surrounding the building.
“I don’t know why you’re surprised,” Avery muttered. “Luc doesn’t do anything half-way.”
Trey turned to his sister. “I heard he’s having the reception at the banquet hall where we had Dad’s birthday party?”
Marisa shrugged. “I wouldn’t know. I haven’t spoken to him since I left Florida.”
All eyes turned to her. “Not once?” Sierra asked. “Not even to find out if he needed any help planning the service?”
Marisa refused to feel guilty about her absence, though a niggling voice in the back of her head told her that if the situation were reversed and she had lost a parent, Luc would have camped out on her doorstep to offer support. “Obviously, he managed to pull it off without my help.”
“Still, I’m sure he could have used a friend,” Lexi said quietly.
Marisa suddenly felt like she was under attack, like she was the one who had been lying by omission. “I didn’t cause this situation. Luc was the one who chose to keep me in the dark about his daughter.”
“He wanted to tell you,” Trey said. He closed his eyes, obviously realizing he’d said too much.
Marisa was coming to terms with the fact that Luc had betrayed her, but her own brother had chosen to keep her in the dark about something that would have such an impact on her future? “You knew about this?” Marisa said quietly, trying to hold her temper. “You knew Luc had a daughter and you chose to keep his secret? Didn’t you think about what this might do to me or was your loyalty to your best friend your first and only priority?”
Sierra reached across the seat to grab her hand. “Honey...”
She looked around the car at her friends. “Did he tell y’all about this? Was I the only one who was blis
sfully ignorant?”
Trey sighed. “No one else knew. He just told me a few weeks ago. I begged him to tell ya, Marisa.”
She looked her brother in the eye. She and Trey were always close because they were always honest with each other, no matter how much it hurt. “How could you keep this from me, Trey?”
He reached out to her, but she slid out of the car, anxious to put some distance between herself and her brother.
“Marisa, wait,” Sierra said, exiting the car behind her. She sprinted to catch up, slipping her arm through
Marisa’s. “You know how much Trey loves you. He’d never do anything to hurt you, honey.”
Marisa swore and swiped at the tears sliding down her cheeks. “That’s what I thought about Luc and Tim.” She took a tissue out of her purse and dabbed at her eyes. “I don’t feel like I can trust anyone anymore, Sierra.”
Her friend wrapped her arm around her. “You can trust me, always.”
Marisa sniffled. “Thanks.”
“Listen, maybe you need to get away for a while. Take some time to think.”
The idea of escaping this mess sounded like the answer to her prayers. “What’d you have in mind?”
“You know Trey bought that beachfront condo in Panama last year. Why not go for a couple of weeks? Maybe it’d help you to gain some perspective.”
“I don’t know if I want to ask my brother for any favors right now,” Marisa said, still feeling the sting of bitterness stifling her.
“He wouldn’t even have to know about it.” Sierra winked at her. “If he and Luc can keep secrets, why can’t we, right?”
Marisa slipped her arm around her best friend’s waist. “What would I do without you?”
“Does that mean you’ll go?”
“Yeah, thanks. I think that’s exactly what I need to get my head together.”
“Uh oh, don’t look now, but Luc’s headed this way,” Sierra whispered.
“Oh God, I am so not ready to deal with this,” Marisa said, closing her eyes.
He looked striking in a crisp black suit, white shirt, and black tie. Crowds parted for him while people turned to stare. He was a formidable man, clearly on a mission, which appeared to involve her.
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