by Delisa Lynn
“Oh shit, woman, I thought you were already gone?” he questions.
“Nope, I am leaving in a few. Why aren’t you ready for the game?” I ask and then I see a fucking skank walking out of his room. How did I not know she was here?
“See you, Zan. Thank you, for last night.” The bimbo says as she walks out the door.
He waves and turns to me. “Sorry Audrey, I thought you were gone.”
“Don’t apologize to me, when your dick falls off that’s on you not me. You could have picked someone more attractive at least. She is a whore and she’s in my economics class. Sage, right?” I say as I roll my eyes.
“Uh, yeah that’s her name.”
“You don’t even know her fucking name? God, you drive me crazy. I’m leaving good luck today. Haydon and I will be there we are doing dinner and drinks afterwards.” I say as I grab my purse and leave.
Walking out the door, I want to go find that skank and pound her head into the wall. I walk to the elevator in hopes that I do see her. She must have scampered away though. I push the button to the first floor, I lean back against the wall. Wondering why in the hell am I letting all these girls fuck the man I love. “I am a fucking idiot,” I say aloud. The door opens; I walk out as fast as I can. When I walk out of the building, I see the tramp. She is waiting for a taxi. She sees me and watches my every move.
“Suzie? Is it?” I snarl.
“Hi, Audrey, it’s actually Sage.” She smiles.
“Oh, that’s right. Well, I just thought you would like to know that the guy you just slept with has gonorrhea. You may want to get checked.” I say as I turn to walk away.
“Audrey, wait.” She says, so I turn back around. “Zander and I didn’t have sex. I well, you know. But, he wants you, can’t you see that? I wouldn’t let that one get away, if I were you. See you around sweetie.” She waves as she gets in the taxi. I stand there seeing that my trick backfired on me. Why the hell did she fucking tell me that?
I decide to walk to Haydon’s, I needed the fresh air. My mind is going all over the place. If I give into Zander, he is going to hurt me and it would be bad. I know he will break my heart and I won’t let him do to me what his father did to my mother. There is no way in hell I am going to be like that monster woman. Friends, that’s all we can be is friends…
The game was amazing, we won of course. Zander is one of the best players on the team. He’s going out with the guys and I’m going with Haydon. We’re going to Zeb’s. Haydon has wanted to have sex with Evan for months, but I think she ended up screwing Brody. They are all nice looking. Evan has too much drama, Lila who has a man and Tatum who has a man already. Poor guy. He’s singing tonight, I love to hear him sing.
As we enter the bar, I see a guy from one of my classes. He is a super sweet guy. He’s tried talking to me before and I have blown him off. Not tonight, I am going to talk to him and hope that the guys tell Zander. I’ll give him a taste of his own medicine. I walk over to the bar and give the bartender my fake I.D. and he knows it’s fake. However, he is good friends with the guys and serves me anyways. I turn around to see that Dale is right behind me.
“Oh, hey Dale, how are you?” I say, as I take a sip of my beer.
“Good, you look great tonight. Would you like to dance with me?”
“Thanks, sure why not.” I say as I down my beer.
“Damn girl, you just downed that entire bottle.” He laughs as he grabs my hand and pulls me over to the center dance floor. Haydon is standing at the bar eyeing me. I just give her a wink and smile.
As we dance to the lyrics of “Goodbye” by Train, I see Zander staring in our direction. Wait; where in the hell did he come from. I wrap my arms around Dale’s neck and I swear I see steam coming from Zanders ears. I move one of my hands to Dales and push it down to my ass. At that point, I see Zander walking toward us. Just as he approaches us, I kiss Dale. The next thing I know, I’m pulled away from Dale and Zander is beating the crap out of him.
“What the fuck do you think you are doing, dick face? Get off of him, you big brut.” I yell.
“Why the hell were his hands all over you, Audrey? Go home now.” Zander seethes.
“Fuck you… When did you become my boss? Now leave him alone.” I say as I reach down to help Dale up.
“Dude, what the fuck was that for. All we were doing was dancing. You need to control that fucking temper of yours.” Dale says to Zander as he wipes the blood from his mouth with the back of his hand, smearing the crimson everywhere with a look of disgust on his face.
“You need to stay away from, Audrey, you hear me punk. The next time you won’t be able to walk out of here.” He says as he pushes Dale again and walks toward the bathroom.
“Oh no, you don’t, tell me what the fuck that’s all about.” I demand.
“Are you fucking blind or just stupid? Can you not see that I want you?” He says, running his hands through his hair and down his face.
“Oh well, it didn’t seem like you needed me when Sage was climbing off of your dick this morning.”
“I didn’t fuck her. She gave me a fucking blow job. The entire time I wished it were your lips wrapped around my dick. Not hers. Oh and by the way, she called me. Good call on saying I have an STD. See, you are jealous.”
“I’ve told you, I don’t want to be with you. How the hell are you going to make someone be with you if they don’t want too? We can’t keep doing this Zander; I love you. I enjoy your company and snuggling with you. But I can’t be your girl. Can we please just move past this?” I ask as a tear runs down my cheek.
“Why are you crying? Look at me, tell me you don’t want me. Go ahead and I will leave you alone, we will strictly be friends. Can you tell me that you want nothing more than friends?” he yells.
“No, I cannot tell you that… I just fucking can’t, Zander. We can never be together. So just drop it. I am leaving. I’ll see you at home… Please just let me go.” I whisper.
“Go ahead, run. That is what you do best right. Every time I get close enough for you to open up, you run. You can’t run forever, someday you will see. I just hope by then it isn’t too fucking late.”
“Be careful, I’ll see you at home.” I say as I run out of the bathroom. I run right into Evan.
“Audrey, darlin’ what’s wrong? Did you calm the beast down?”
“He is okay, I have to go. Can you give me a ride? If Lila is okay with it.”
“Of course I will. She won’t mind. Come on let’s go.” He wraps his arms around me, walks me out of the bar, and helps me into his car.
I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this. The man I love wants me and I keep pushing him away. I’m afraid I’m going to push him too far then I’ll lose him for good. I sit in silence as Evan drives me home. I look down and I have either Dale or Zander’s blood all over my legs. I can’t believe he beat the shit out him for dancing with me. Or it could have been the kiss.
Evan walks me to my door, I go in and shower. I put on one of Zander’s tee-shirts. The smell of him makes me feel safe. I feel like he is near, if I have his clothes on. I pull my hair up and make my way to the couch. There is no way I am going to be able to sleep tonight. So I text Ta. I hoped she would be awake.
Me: You’re BROTHER beat the shit out of my friend because I was dancing with him.
I wait for about ten minutes then she texts back.
Ta: WTF? You two need to seriously fuck already. He loves you, you love him quit denying it.
Me: I hate you right now.
Ta: I love you… Now go to bed.
Me: Yes, Mom. <3
She doesn’t respond. I lie on the couch staring at the ceiling, hoping that Zander would just come home. I don’t know what I am going to say to him. But I have to tell him how I feel.
I can’t believe Audrey was kissing that son of a bitch. I wanted to rip his fucking head off his shoulders. She has no clue what she does to me. Every day, I wake up wanting her, needing her to
kiss me and tell me how much she loves me. But she won’t, I know she has the same feelings, she just won’t open up she won’t let me in. I can’t figure out why. This shit is getting ridiculous. Walking into the bar, I see Brody. He tells me Evan took Audrey home. I get a drink and sit at the bar. I see Zeb walking toward me.
“Hey, there will be no more of that here in my bar. You hear me. I know that you want that girl, but you can’t go starting fights with everyone that looks at her. Meet me here tomorrow night so you can help unload the truck to cover the damage. Understood?”
“Yes, sir. I am sorry.” I say as I shake his hand and down my beer.
“Brody can you give me a ride?”
“Yeah, I’m heading out anyways.”
Leaving the bar, I decide that I am not going home tonight—I’m going to stay with Evan and Brody. The drive home is quiet. Brody knows what Audrey does to me. I look at my phone to see if she has called or sent a text. But she hadn’t. I follow Brody into the building and to their unit. As we walk in the door, Evan is sitting at the bar laughing. I have a swollen lip; I can feel it.
“So looks like that dude got one swing in to the upper lip, huh?” Evan smirks.
“Fuck you, Evan. I am crashing here, if that’s okay. How is Audrey doing? I can’t be around her tonight; she’s giving me so many mixed signals. I’m so tired of it because I want her so goddamn bad. Can you all see that she wants me that she is putting on a front? Or is it just me?”
“She is fine, I walked her home. I can see it too. Give her time, she wants you, there is just something holding her back.” Evan says.
Trying to lie on the couch and get comfortable, but I can’t so I decide to go home. Knowing she would probably be asleep by now. I walk to our unit and go in the door and I see a note attached to the door.
I go in and I see Audrey asleep on the couch. She’s curled up in one of my NYU shirts. I walk over, pull the throw over her and kiss her forehead. She is so fucking beautiful even when she is sleeping. I start to walk away and I hear her moan.
“Zander, is that you? Where have you been, I was worried about you.”
“Yes, I was at Evan’s. Come on, I’ll put you in bed.”
“No, I can. Just go to bed. Did you see the note?” She swats me away.
“Yes, I saw it.” I say as I walk into my room, I close the door and walk into my bathroom get in the shower. Wondering why she keeps pushing me away. I hear a knock on the door. I didn’t say anything I knew she would come in.
“Zander, I don’t know what’s going on. But this thing between us is going to hurt one of us, if not both.” She says as she sits on the side of my bed. By now, I am standing in front of her with a towel wrapped around my waist.
“So what is it that you suggest we do? I want you, there is no denying that. I’ve been telling you for years, you are the one that seems to not what the same thing. Well, you keep saying that anyways.”
“Zander, I’m scared. I don’t know what to do. I just don’t think it will work.”
“I will never hurt you, can you trust that I will make this work. Just give me a chance.” I feel like I am begging, but hell, I will beg her until she says yes.
“I want you, I do. I’ve never had these feelings for anyone. Just you.” She stands and walks closer to me. “I need you, I do.” She whispers before crashing her lips to mine.
It’s been a few weeks since the incident at the bar and Zander has been tip-toeing around me. We haven’t kissed since then. I swear he thinks I am cray-cray. We haven’t been eating dinner together like we normally do. He seems to always be busy. I try and make like I don’t notice, but I have. I miss him so much. I worry about him when he isn’t here.
Tonight, he came home drunk. Coming in to tell me goodnight, as he always does, He sits on the foot of my bed, as I’m lying here reading the latest romance book by my favorite author. I lay my kindle on the nightstand and look in his eyes. His mocha eyes and dark tan always make me feel warm and fuzzy, inside and out, no matter where we were.
“Will you sleep in my room with me tonight?” He asks as he slides his boots off.
“Of course. I like when you snuggle me.” What the fuck Audrey, why would you so something so damn cheesy. “I mean, I like when we are together.” Fuck me that sounds just as bad.
“I’ve had a long week and you always make things better. Give me five minutes to change and come in. Leave that damn book thing in here though.” He says as he walks out of the room.
Gawd, I’m going to sleep in Zander’s bed. I’m glad the cleaning lady came today because she changed all the bed sheets. I know he had some whore here a few nights ago.
I walk into his room and he is already lying in bed. I go to the opposite side he’s on and slide in next to him. I snuggle into his side. His body is so fucking sexy, the thing’s I’d dreamed of doing to him. His scent is amazing, it’s not like any cologne I’d ever smelled. It’s just Zander.
“Thank you, for always being here for me, Audrey. You’re a wonderful friend. I love you, sweetheart. I know you want nothing more than to be friends, but know I am here for you.” He says as he kisses my forehead.
Umm, did Zander Kelley just say he loved me? Totally swooning right now.
“I’ll always be here for you. That’s what friends do right? I love you too, cunt-bag.” I want to say more than you will ever know, but I don’t. I keep my damn mouth closed. I have to keep pretending I don’t care.
As we lie there wrapped in each other arms, I think about what a future with him would be like. I could get used to being in Zander’s arms for the rest of my life. The only thing is I keep hearing my birth mother’s words playing repeatedly in my mind.
I turned to face him and just as I did, his hand wrapped around my waist, his mouth crashes to mine. He parts my mouth with his tongue and once inside he explores my mouth with his tongue. It reminds me of the last kiss we shared. Only this one is so much better. It is very intense and hot, fucking hot.
I run my tongue over his, a small moan escapes my mouth. He knows what I want, he runs his hands up my thighs, as he reaches the waist of my PINK boy shorts, I lift my body just enough for him to slide them off. I didn’t realize my panties had come off with them until I feel his warm, hand on the inside of my thighs.
His kisses have me wanting so much more of him; I take my hand out of his hair and run it down his chiseled chest. My fingers trace the lining of his perfect ‘V’ shape that leads to the place I’d wanted to see for the last couple of years. I pull his shorts down, as he kisses my neck. Looking down, I see his gorgeous body lying there and he’s fully erect. Thinking about the things I want to do to him, makes me instantly wet.
As I reach his length, I hear a groan escape him. I start rubbing him, I can feel his pre-cum between my fingertips. He is much larger than the other guys I’ve been with. His hands are fisting through my hair and it has me dripping wet, I slide my body down his. I take his length in my mouth. I can taste him; it’s salty and sweet, even better than I imagined. I look up at him and he has his eyes closed with his head tilted back. The groans that escape his mouth are the sexist ones I’ve ever heard.
I take my other hand and place it on my clit, as I rub myself, I run my tongue from the base of his shaft to the tip. Just as I start sucking harder, he places his hands on either side of my head and pulls me up his body. The look of hunger is in his eyes. I place my finger on his lips and he licks it dry. I can see the smirk on his face as he rips my tank top off and he finds out I’m not wearing a bra. He pulls a nipple in between his teeth and lets out a groan. He then looks at me grinning.
“You are fucking beautiful, Audrey. I’ve dreamed of seeing you naked for years. Now it’s my turn to explore your sexy body, I am going to lick you places you didn’t even know you had. Lie back, let me make you come.”
Lying back, I feel his large callused hands opening my thighs. I know I’m fucking soaked already. I haven’t had sex for months, well other than
Pinky and he hasn’t been out of my night stand in a few weeks. The heat of Zanders breath gives me chills. He starts kissing, my thighs and works his way up to my center.
He parts my lower lips with his tongue and his lips go straight to my clit. I can feel my back arch as his teeth scrape over it. He places both hands under my ass and pushes his head into my pussy as far as he can. I’m coming so hard, all I can scream was, “Oh fuck me.” I want to feel him in me so fucking bad.
“You want me to fuck you, Audrey?” I shake my head yes. “Tell me again what you want me to do.” He demands.
“I want you to fuck me and to feel you deep inside of me Zander. Please, I need you so bad.” I beg.
“Are you on the pill?” he asks, as he places a chaste kiss on my cheek.
“Yes, of course I am.” I tremble, looking into his eyes.
“Good because I’m going to fuck you. I don’t want anything to be between us. Once I finally feel your sweet pussy wrapped around my cock, I want to feel you and not a Goddamn condom.” He commands.
I can feel a lump in my throat, as I try to speak. Finally, I get the words out. “Do you always use a condom?” I question as I look in his eyes. I’ve never had sex without one.
“Yes, always. Except now. You are different, Audrey, you aren’t one of those random girls I hook up with. If you want me to use one, I will. But I really don’t fucking want to.” He mumbles as he starts kissing me. I can taste myself on his lips and I have to admit, it turns me on even more.
“You don’t have to, Zander. Please, let me feel you inside of me. But know I’ve always used a condom. So this is a first for me.”
“Good, because I don’t want to imagine some fucker with his dick buried deep inside of you with no condom.” Then he pushes himself in me. “You are so tight, baby. Goddamn, I may come quickly.” I was afraid of how big he is, it doesn’t hurt much, the pleasure is better than the pain.