by DJ Parker
You’re right. I am no longer in love with the woman I knew five years ago because I fell in love with the woman she became. I wish that I could explain why I have to leave, but I can’t. In the weeks to come, you may hear news about my demise. You may hear horror stories about me. Just know that you and our daughters are the best parts of me. You and our daughters have seen the most real parts of me. I know that you’re angry and hurt, but please allow my daughters to keep the letters that I wrote to them. They need to know that their father loved them more than life itself. They need to know that everything that I’ve done was for them.
Please find it in your heart to forgive me because I never meant to hurt you. Each time that your heart skips a beat, just remember that it is me reminding you that I will always love you.
A.
Tears weltered in the brim of my eyes as I realized that this was déjà vu. Andriano chose La Cosa Nostra, and I allowed myself to become vulnerable again.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Andriano
Queens, New York
Waiting for Battista to come from Italy, I had to ignore the wariness that weighed heavily on my heart as I thought about how hard it was to leave Simone and our daughters. I knew that I couldn’t expose them to any more danger. I knew that I had to finish what was started. But, in knowing that, I knew that there was a great chance that I may not return home to them if I didn’t hit first. I’m still unsure as to what is going on or who is involved, but I knew that I had to be cautious with even family.
Taking a non-stop flight over to JFK airport from Italy last night, I made sure to keep my return a secret from everyone. I planned on laying low until I was able to get more knowledge of who the rat was. Feeling my phone vibrate against my pants, I glimpsed at the number and saw that it was Nicolai.
I answered, “What’s going on?”
“Josephine’s dead. She was assassinated in the back of some alley in Queens. They just identified her body.”
“Women and children are off limits. Whoever did this shit doesn’t give a fuck about the rules.”
“Andriano stay where you’re at because shit is getting too heavy. I’ll take care of the arrangements for Josephine. Just lay low.”
“Too late, I’m out here.”
~****~
Battista dropped his bags at the door and sat down on the couch while I went straight into my office at my loft. Punching in my security code, I opened the wall vault and pulled out two bulletproof vests, four Glock 42’s, some revolvers, and bullets. Making my way back to the living room, I tossed a vest over to Battista and proceeded to put my own vest on. Battista and I became lost in the silence as we loaded each of the Glocks with bullets. Slipping two Glocks into the back of my waist, I pulled my shirt over my pieces. Pulling out my phone, I read the text message from Nicolai.
“Are you ready?” I asked Battista as he cracked his neck.
“Always,” he answered confidently.
Walking out of the front door, I nodded to the four soldiers that stood outside of my door before saying, “Let’s go.”
Nicolai and Vincenzo were in the car waiting for us. Signaling my men to follow us, I hopped into Nicolai’s truck as we headed to Staten Island. “I secured a spot on Hylan Boulevard,” I announced to Nicolai as I plugged the address into his GPS.
“This is complete bullshit,” Vincenzo mumbled under his breath.
Ignoring his comment, I laid my head against the headrest and looked outside of the window. My thoughts drifted off to Simone and my daughters. They didn’t deserve to be alone today while they said goodbye to their grandmother. I made a vow to protect my daughters, but in doing so, I had to be without my daughters. It was still a mystery as to who was behind the killings. Why was Josephine behind that alley? She was assassinated just like her father and mother. Even though I despised her, Josephine did not deserve to die like that.
From my peripheral, I could see Vincenzo shifting in his seat as he constantly looked down at his cell phone. He gave off this unsettling vibe that usually hinted that he was up to some bullshit that Nicolai would have to get him out of. As I shifted my focus to Nicolai, he remained calm as he drove down the West-Side Highway.
“Nicolai, change of plans. Let’s go to that pick-up spot on Long Island.”
“Are you sure?” Nicolai asked as he looked at me in the rearview mirror. Nodding my head, Nicolai continued to drive while I continued to observe Vincenzo’s body language. A few minutes later, Vincenzo pulled out his cell phone and began typing.
“Fuck,” Vincenzo cursed to himself as his palms rubbed against his jeans. He’s nervous, I thought as I continued to watch him rake his fingers through his hair.
“I think that we should stick with the original plan,” Vincenzo said.
“And why is that?” I asked Vincenzo as I rubbed my fingers over my piece of steel.
“Because we’re not going to be able to get Vallenti’s men,” he responded.
~****~
Looking around, I searched for any suspicious cars that may have followed us. Entering the side door of the Laundromat, we made our way to the office downstairs in the basement. Sitting at the roundtable of this small dark room, I focused my attention on Vincenzo. His answer from when we were in the car replayed in my head as I struggled to deal with the fact that my own blood would want me dead.
“You want me dead?” I asked as the office became silent. Within seconds, Battista pointed the barrel of his Glock at the temple Vincenzo’s head.
“Fuck you, Andriano,” Vincenzo finally said after a few minutes of staring back at me.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Nicolai screamed as he pulled out his piece and aimed it at Battista. Vincenzo’s face became my tunnel vision as I drowned out all the sound around us and focused on Vincenzo’s breathing. Beads of sweat settled on his forehead as his eyes remained fixed on me.
“How did you know about the Vallenti men?” I asked Vincenzo.
Chapter Forty
Simone
As I dressed the girls in their navy blue dresses, memories of Grandma flooded my mind like a sea of thoughts smashing against my head. Standing in the middle of their bedroom, I tried to control the emotions that flowed throughout my body. Grandma and I worked on this bedroom. We saw it transform from a nursery to a toddler room designed to fit the personalities of three beautiful and unique girls. We would laugh about the girls and their differences. This room…this house was filled with laughter and functioned on Grandma’s strength. Now she’s gone, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be as strong as she was.
“Mommy, we can’t forget to bring the box,” Olivia said as she held the multi-colored box that she and her sisters designed with Andriano. Andriano…
Reminding myself to remain strong for the sake of my daughters, I continued to brush Acelia’s hair.
“Are you ready?” Victoria asked as she entered the girls’ bedroom. Nodding my head, she ushered Olivia and Jasmine out of the room. Hopping into the limousine, I placed the sunglasses over my eyes and reminded myself that I will not cry today.
~****~
Two weeks later
Holding the letter close to my heart, I bit back the cry that threatened to escape my trembling lips. For the past two weeks, I tried to maintain strength and courage as I dealt with the questions that my daughters had. First they lost their Nana and now the man who they called Daddy has left their life abruptly. How can I explain to my daughters that he chose La Cosa Nostra over them again? How do I break down the kind of complex life that he had? Instead, I had to deal with my hurt by myself. I had to put a Band-Aid over all of the wounds that my children and I had.
Adding more tissues to the pile of tissues that formed a dome on my bed, I bit down on my knuckles with enough force to break skin. But even that did nothing to alleviate the pain that I felt in my broken heart. Reaching for my drawer, I pulled the little box that he gave to me five years ago. I needed to find peace in my heart. Opening the
box, my puffy eyes looked down at this single solitaire diamond ring.
Pulling the diamond ring out, my eyes focused on the engraving that was etched into the band of the ring: My heart will always find you. Slipping the ring onto my finger, I was surprised that it was a perfect fit. Just as I was about to place the box back into the drawer, the box slipped out of my hands as the inner workings fell out. A cube sized folded paper fell out of the box. Unfolding the piece of the paper, I recognized Andriano’s handwriting.
Bella Mia,
I woke up with every intention to give up everything just to be with you. But it was not that simple, bella mia. I never expected my family to accept you, but I never knew just how ruthless my family could be…using my heart against me. I planned on taking you far away. Taking you away from my fucked up world and finally doing right by you. Starting with going down on one knee.
There were consequences that I couldn’t bear to live with. I couldn’t live with the fact that you would have to look over your shoulders for the rest of your life. Moreover, I couldn’t live with the fact that you could get harmed because of me. I would rather die first. But since I’m worth more alive than dead, I’d rather part ways with you right now then to have people get to you in order to get to me. I’m going to have to sink into the darkened state that I left behind when I met you. I’m going to have to be the man that I was ready to give up for you.
In our perfect world, we would be traveling to every place that you dreamed about. We would have kept our baby. We would have been married. We would have lived out our happiness and grown old together. But, this is not our time.
I will find a way to get back to you. I will give you everything that you deserved from life…from me.
A.
Swallowing the tears that hung onto the rim of my eyes, I felt this burden that weighed heavily on my heart as I thought about how much loss that I experienced. Andriano lived on through my daughter’s smiles, their attitudes, and the memories of them getting a chance to meet their father. A warmness touched my heart as I found peace through my pain.
~****~
Waking up feeling more refreshed, I headed down the stairs and prepared breakfast for the girls. After, I made their lunch and ran up the stairs to wake them up. Once the girls finished eating, I sent them straight into the bathroom where I washed them up. Everything seemed to run smoothly this morning. The girls did not fuss about the clothes that I picked out for them, and I was able to get them out before I started work. As I opened the front door, an elderly Caucasian man had his fingers near the doorbell.
“Can I help you?” I asked, startled by this unannounced visit.
Fixing his glasses, the Caucasian man introduced himself as, “Mr. Dollfield?”
“How can I help you?” I asked as I swooped hair behind my ears and closed the front door behind me.
“Well Ms. Sinn, I was your husband’s attorney before his untimely death. Is there a way that we could discuss his will?”
Puzzled, I asked, “Husband?”
“Andriano Balducci,” he confirmed.
Looking over at my daughters, I cleared my throat before saying, “You have the wrong person.”
“He did say that you would say that,” the stern-looking lawyer remarked as he pulled out a camera. Shifting the screen, the lawyer handed me the camera. Andriano’s face appeared on the screen as my finger pressed the play button.
Andriano: Bella mia, I know that you’ll always do everything to protect our daughters. But, Mr. Dollfield is safe. He’s my attorney and he’s been ordered to make sure that you accept everything that is in the will.
“Daddy!” the girls screamed in mix-matched unison.
“I want to see Daddy,” whined Acelia.
After allowing the girls to see their father, I handed the camera over to him and said, “Now is not a good time. I have to drop the girls off and head over to work. Perhaps you come at another time.”
“Yes, sure. How about tomorrow?” He asked as he pulled out his card.
“Tomorrow won’t work. Maybe on Friday at 9:00 in the morning?”
“That works. Have a good day Ms. Sinn,” walking away, Mr. Dollfield hopped into his car and drove off.
Chapter Forty-One
Simone
Two days later
The ringing of the doorbell snapped me out of my trance as I jumped off the couch. Today was the day that Andriano’s lawyer was going to come and discuss this will that was drafted before his death. Opening the door, I came face to face with Mr. Dollfield. Ushering him into the home, I guided him into the living room.
“Please have a seat,” I said as I sat across from him.
“Thank you, Ms. Sinn,” he responded as he plopped himself on the couch. “Now to discuss this will. Mr. Balducci has various estates, properties, businesses, stocks, accounts, and a number of vaults that he has given to you and his daughters. This is an estimated $6.8 billion dollars. I will just need your signatures on these documents so that it can be officially transferred into your name. Also, before he passed, Mr. Balducci purchased a house here in North Carolina. He has also placed the house in your name,” pulling out a set of keys, Mr. Dollfield placed the keys on the coffee table. “He installed a security system that has authorization codes. It is all written down on this paper,” he continued as he slid the paper across the coffee table.
“This is just too much. I don’t know where to begin,” I said as I struggled to search for the right words. Overwhelmed, I stood up and paced the room while raking my fingers through my bob. “Andriano was married to another woman. Maybe there was a mix-up somewhere.”
Looking over the file, Mr. Dollfield looked up at me and asked, “You are Simone Sinn, correct?”
Nodding my head, he continued, “Mr. Balducci has awarded you and his daughters everything. We will need to proceed with the signing of the papers and I will have to make copies for you to have for your records.” Stretching his short arm out, Mr. Dollfield handed a pen to me. Hunching over, I read through the will and then finally signed all of the documents.
“Great Ms. Sinn,” Mr. Dollfield stood up and shook my hand. “I will be mailing the copies to the new house.”
“Wait, what?” I asked.
“I have specific instructions to mail all documents to your new home,” replied Mr. Dollfield. Nodding my head, I walked Mr. Dollfield out the front door. Closing the door behind me, I leaned against the door and exhaled the jitters out.
After a few minutes passed, I released the door handle that I gripped tightly. Making my way up the stairs, I headed straight to my daughters’ bedroom and looked at all three of them sleeping. To some degree, I felt guilty about signing the documents. Money cannot replace the loss of their father, and unfortunately it appears that this is the reality. Feeling nauseous, I ran out of the bedroom and puked into the toilet bowl.
Running cool water over my face, I lifted my head and stared at my reflection in the mirror. Inhaling and exhaling, I repeated my breathing exercise and reminded myself of my hidden strength. You can do this.
~****~
Driving up the hill in the remote outskirts of North Carolina, I came across the only mansion that sat on a vast amount of land. Pressing on the brakes, I stopped as my eyes took in just how huge the mansion was. Tapping lightly on the gas pedal, I continued to drive and stopped at the security pad. Shuffling through my bag, I pulled out the paper with the details about the codes. Typing in the seven-digit code, I pressed enter and saw the gates open wide. Driving through, I came across another security pad and typed the code to close the gates.
Parking the car in front of entryway leading to the double doors, I pulled the keys out of my bag and attempted to unlock the door with trembling fingers.
“Mommy, this house is bigger than our house,” Olivia pointed out as her eyes widened with excitement.
“Well Livy, this is your new home,” I announced as I turned the knob and pushed the door open.
Runni
ng past me, the girls screamed with excitement as I stood in the doorway and nearly collapsed at the sight before me.
“Andriano,” I said as I became paralyzed at the sight of him. “No,” I said as I shook my head with tear-filled eyes.
“Bella mia,” he called out to me as he walked towards me with all three girls in his arms. Dropping them to their feet, Andriano inched closer as I backed away from him slowly. Catching me by my waist, Andriano pulled my body closer to him and whispered against my lips, “I told you that my heart would always find you.” Capturing my lips, Andriano’s arms wrapped around my body like a glove as I melted against his mouth. Lifting me slightly off of my feet, I snaked my arms around his neck and kissed his tender lips as tears spilled down my cheeks.
A filter of giggles ended our moment of bliss as Andriano dropped me down to my feet. Looking into Andriano’s eyes, I gave him questioning glances. Softening his eyes, Andriano gave me a silent answer before saying, “I’ve missed you all so much.”
“I missed you too, Daddy,” Acelia said in a low voice as Andriano picked her up.
“Let’s go see your bedrooms. I had them decorated with everything that you’ll like,” Andriano said as he led the way throughout the house.
Chapter Forty-Two
Andriano
My mouth watered with need to lick the wetness that flowed between her legs, as my cock strained with swollen balls that threatened to burst. Licking her inner thighs, I spread her legs wider and focused on her drenched puffy flaps of her ripened pussy. With eager fingers, I spread her lips only to expose her swollen clit. Her clit was glazed with the gloss that flowed out of her. Licking my lips, my mouth covered the nub. Closing my eyes, I savored in the moment as her clit pounded against my lips. Loving the feel of her erected clit, I began to suck and tug harder. Grabbing a fistful of my hair, Simone tugged on my strands as my fingers made its way to her dripping canal.