He was smiling. ‘The reason for that is not because I stepped on her toes, I can assure you. It’s because she’s living with her sister in the town and rarely needs to come here for anything.’
‘That will change, of course, when she comes back to work. What arrangements she will make for the baby when the time comes I don’t know. But getting back to your offer of assisting at the practice, could you start on Monday?’
‘Yes. I don’t see why not.’
‘Good. That will be great.’ He was glancing towards the cottage and said, ‘It all seems very quiet over there. Where are the children?’
‘They’re both involved with sleepovers. Kirstie is staying at the vicar’s house. As you know, his daughter Jessica is one of her best friends. And Ben is taking part in a twenty-four-hour fast for charity in the community centre with some of his friends.’
‘I don’t believe it!’ he exclaimed laughingly. ‘He won’t last that long without food.’
‘We’ll have to see, won’t we?’ she replied, sharing his amusement.
His next comment took her by surprise. ‘I suppose you’re all geared up for an early night because you’re off across the Channel again in the morning.’
‘Not necessarily,’ she replied. ‘I’ve had my fill of early nights lately. Why do you ask?’
‘Once I’ve changed into something more comfortable than this suit, I’m going to go for a stroll along the beach, and as you don’t have to be here for Kirstie and Ben, do you fancy joining me?’
‘Er, yes, I suppose I could,’ she said hesitantly. ‘Have you eaten yet?’
‘Yes, I have. Maria went across to the bakery and got me some sandwiches before she went home.’
‘Give me a buzz when you’re ready, then,’ she suggested, and went back into the cottage.
As she waited for him to ring, Francine knew that she was letting down another of her defences by offering to help out at the surgery, but she couldn’t stand by and watch Ethan doing the work of two doctors and having the children at weekends as well. He wouldn’t have a moment to spare, while she would be relaxing in France with all the time in the world at her disposal.
And now, without barely a second’s thought, she’d agreed to go walking with him in the moonlight with the scent of bluebells all around them. She would have to keep a hold on her feelings and every time she felt she was weakening bring to mind the Paris house.
A little later, as they set off towards the headland and the beach below, she broke the silence that had fallen between them by asking, ‘Why didn’t Leo look for a position in general practice nearer Manchester if his mother is so ill?’
‘Your guess is as good as mine,’ he replied. ‘I really don’t know, but I’ll tell you one thing, I don’t want to lose him. He’s settled in well with the patients, is a good doctor, and there would be no problem if it wasn’t for his mother’s health.’
As they clambered down the cliffside to where the beach lay smooth and golden between the tides, to Francine it felt like how it used to be. A special place with the Devon countryside around it dotted with fertile farms, hotels and guest houses amongst sweeping green fields, all of which had been part of the magic of Bluebell Cove before they’d separated. It was the place they’d come to as newly qualified doctors and she’d thought she would be happy to stay there for ever.
But she’d reckoned without circumstances, without the meddling fates. A new horizon had opened out in front of her, the opportunity to live in the gracious house where she’d been born.
It was a haunting moment, the two of them on the beach in the spring dusk.
Before the children had been born they’d once made love down there in the warm night when the place had been deserted. She wondered if Ethan remembered. He turned to face her and she knew by his expression that he did.
She stepped away from him, knowing she had to break into the moment that was wrapping itself around them. Any future life-shattering decisions she made would have to be in cold blood from now on, not in anger and frustration as before, or in the heat of the passion that could arise between them so quickly if they would let it.
So she said casually, ‘Have you heard from your solicitor recently? Mine seems to be dragging her feet.’
Ethan had been content just to be with her, but not now, and his reply was in keeping with his expression. ‘Why did you have to spoil this short time together, Francine?’ he asked stonily. ‘Yes, I’ve heard from my guy and he tells me that everything is going ahead as planned. Just think, you’ll soon have what you’ve wanted, the freedom to live your life rattling around in that big house that was your parents’. Whoopee!’
‘You know very well that isn’t how I wanted it to be,’ she said in a low voice. ‘I wanted us all to live there, but it hasn’t worked out like that. I had a dream, Ethan, and am sure you’ll be pleased to know that it’s fading.’
He was looking around him. ‘I suggest we go. I’ve always loved it here down on the beach, but at this moment its appeal is missing.’ She didn’t move and he asked, ‘Did you hear what I said? I’m not leaving you down here in the dark, so let’s go, Francine.’ As if she’d suddenly tuned in to what he was saying, she nodded and without speaking went before him up the cliffside.
When they stopped outside their respective residences he said, ‘So, can I expect you at the surgery on Monday morning?’
‘Did I say I would be there?’
‘Yes.’
‘Well, then, that is where I’ll be. Goodnight, Ethan.’ And without further comment she opened the door of Thimble Cottage and went in, wishing that she’d let their awareness of each down on the beach take its course.
The weekend that followed began like all those that had passed since that first one in January when she’d returned to France without the children. But this one was even more depressing because the frail truce between her and Ethan had been broken when she’d brought him down to earth on the beach on the Friday night.
As she unpacked her weekend case the desire to phone him and make amends was strong. But how could she possibly put things right between them when neither of them was willing to give up what they thought was right, and with divorce proceedings under way?
She was about to make the effort to food shop when the bell rang at the front door and she frowned. Visitors were not part of life here in Paris, she didn’t know anyone that well, but it was ringing again, this time with an insistence to the sound, and she hurried downstairs.
When she opened the door her mouth was a round O of amazement.
Ethan and the children were standing in the porch, smiling at her expression.
‘We thought we’d come to keep you company, didn’t we, guys?’ he said. ‘So here we are. Aren’t you going to ask us in?’
Was she going to ask them in? She was indeed, and throwing wide the door she said, ‘You can rest assured of that! What a lovely surprise, Ethan.’ She put her arms around her son and daughter. ‘But why? You never said you were thinking of joining me here.’
‘The idea only occurred to me last night, and as your flight was fully booked we came on the next one.’ He was looking around him. ‘I have to say I’d forgotten just how lovely Paris is in the spring, and what an attractive house this is.’
‘Yes, it’s lovely,’ she agreed wistfully, ‘but a house like this needs people to fill its rooms, to make it come alive, active people, happy people.’
‘Do you mean to say that it’s got the one but not the other?’
Glancing upwards to where Kirstie and Ben were dashing upstairs to their bedrooms, she said, ‘It didn’t have either until a few moments ago, but you’ve put that right for a short time, Ethan, so shall we forget our differences for a while and enjoy this lovely surprise that you’ve sprung on me? Does your coming here mean that you’ve forgiven me for the argument last night down on the beach?’
‘There was nothing to forgive. You felt that we were asking for trouble, didn’t you, that no matter
how much we were drawn to each by the old magic, things are not right between us, that I needed a reminder, and I’ve taken it on board. So let’s enjoy ourselves over the weekend, if we can remember how,’ he said with a quirky smile. ‘Which room do you want me in, Francine?’
‘You’ll have to share mine,’ she said awkwardly. ‘The children have the other two bedrooms. I use the big bedroom on the front, and the spare room is full of my father’s business equipment. It has been sold and is waiting to be taken away, but the people have not yet been to collect it.’
He was observing her with raised brows. ‘Are you sure?’
‘What? That they are coming to collect it?’
‘No. That you want me in your room.’
‘It is twin bedded Ethan.’
‘But of course,’ he said with assumed gravity, and followed the children upstairs, leaving her to rejoice at the sudden turn of events. Dare she begin to hope that he was going to change his mind about them making their home here? she wondered. And if he did, would she ever forget the scent of bluebells and the pounding of the sea on to a golden beach in Devon?
The four of them spent the afternoon in the city centre, strolling around the shopping areas and art galleries. In the early evening Ethan announced that he’d made a reservation for a dinner cruise along the river Seine through the centre of Paris.
‘How did you manage that?’ she asked.
‘I made it by phone after I’d booked the flight last night, and then it was just a matter of picking Kirstie up from the sleepover at the vicarage this morning and collecting a ravenously hungry Ben from the overnight fast at the community centre with a bag of sandwiches at the ready.’
It was magical, cruising along with a myriad lights illuminating famous landmarks and places of interest as they enjoyed the food. They’d done it a few times before but Francine thought it had never had more meaning than on this spring night with her husband. The husband who had refused to live in the beautiful city of her birth because of a promise to a demanding retired doctor.
But tonight they’d wiped the slate clean for a few hours. It was how they used to be, the four of them a happy family, and she hoped that somewhere in the ether her parents might be looking down on them and understanding how she was torn by her longing to be with her loved ones yet achingly homesick for Paris, even though today was the first time it had felt right being there.
The children were asleep, Ethan was watching sport on television, and Francine thought it was a good moment to end the day.
‘I’ll be up shortly,’ he said casually as she began to climb the stairs, and she nodded without speaking. They’d had a lovely day, the four of them, but what was coming next was awful, sleeping in the same room in separate beds, and she intended to be asleep by the time he put in an appearance.
But sleep was hard to come by and when he appeared in the bedroom doorway dressed in a robe that he must have found in one of the wardrobes, she raised herself on the pillows and picked up a book off the bedside table.
He made no comment, just slipped off the robe and lay on top of the covers in his usual nightly attire, a pair of boxer shorts, but after she’d stared at the same page for at least twenty minutes he asked casually, ‘Do you want a game of Scrabble as you’re having trouble sleeping?’
When she looked across at him he was laughing, dark eyes warm and tender in the face that she knew as well as her own, and then he was on his feet and coming towards her and Francine knew if she didn’t stop him now it would be too late, they would make love and the bliss of it would be wiped out by a feeling of bitter-sweetness because it could be the last time.
So why was she holding out her arms to him, throwing off the covers and letting him slip the straps of her nightdress off her shoulders? ‘It’s been so long, Francine,’ he said as he caressed her from top to toe, ‘we can’t go on like this. I haven’t stopped loving you for a second in spite of the arguments and misunderstandings, and pray that you feel the same about me.’
‘Yes, I do,’ she murmured as their arousal increased until she could think of nothing else but how she wanted him to bring her to the climax that she always achieved when they made love, and he did, until at last they lay content in each other’s arms.
Ethan was the first to speak and she smiled when he said, ‘I’m going to pull my bed across next to yours so that it’s the equivalent of a double. I want you close through the night without us being cramped. OK?’
‘Yes, OK,’ she replied dreamily, with the delightful feeling that at last all was well with her world. Ethan had come to France for the weekend without persuasion and had enjoyed every moment he’d been there with her. Was the nightmare going to end and her parents’ lovely home be filled with noise and laughter once more? She had a feeling that it was.
The flights for him and the children were for the Sunday night because it was school on Monday morning and he and Francine didn’t want them to be no sooner home than having to go straight to school without time to eat and change into their uniforms, so on the off chance of flying back with them she rang the airport and managed to change her ticket.
She’d been up in the clouds all day after spending the night with Ethan and every time their glances met, her heartbeat quickened. The two of them had gone sightseeing in the morning, cruising on the river again afterwards, and had finally had afternoon tea in a small restaurant near the Eiffel Tower that served excellent food, before collecting Kirstie and Ben who’d spent the day with a group of the friends they’d met at their French school. And all the time Francine was rejoicing inwardly because Ethan was coming round to her way of thinking.
When he commented that the children were not supposed to know anyone on this side of the Channel, she just smiled and told him, ‘Their reluctance to come here to live was mainly because you wouldn’t be here. They can cope with living with me in Thimble Cottage because it is only yards away from where you are.’
There’d been no time for any really in-depth discussion after that with Kirstie and Ben around, so the bubble didn’t burst until they were back in Bluebell Cove and the children were asleep. It was then that Francine went across to discuss the weekend’s happenings with Ethan.
She found him on the phone to Leo and when he’d replaced the receiver he said soberly, ‘No joy from that end. Leo could be absent for some time. You will be most welcome to join us at the surgery, Francine.’
‘Er—yes, I suppose so,’ she agreed doubtfully, ‘but in the meantime you will have to make some arrangements for when we’ve gone.’
He was observing her warily. ‘Gone where, Francine?’
‘To Paris, of course. That is what was behind you coming to join me, wasn’t it? The reason why we—’ Her voice trailed away and there was a sinking feeling inside her as she said slowly. ‘Did you make love to me just for the fun of it?’
‘Of course not!’ he exclaimed. ‘I would never do that in a thousand years.’
‘So why then? Not because you cared enough to make my dream come true obviously. It was just a one-off, was it?’
‘No. It was not. When I came into the bedroom last night you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen, and no matter what, you were still mine. That was why, not for any other reason. To sleep with you wasn’t why I’d followed you to France.’
‘It was because I felt bad about the way we’d separated down on the beach and didn’t want to have to wait until Monday before I saw you again. And with regard to me moving to France with you, how in the name of God can I? We’ve been through this a thousand times and it’s not going to change, Francine. I can’t do it.’
‘You could if you tried.’
‘Oh, yes? The practice in Bluebell Cove isn’t clinical and impersonal like those in town centres. It’s a place where friends meet friends, where they know their doctors, see them in the street and the pub, and are relaxed in their presence.
‘When Barbara Balfour retired there was no problem in finding a replacement
. They knew me almost as well as they’d known her, but it wouldn’t be that simple if I went.
‘Leo hasn’t been here long. He hasn’t enough experience of general practice to take over, and he’s bogged down with family commitments. There is no one else who would be suitable. Our patients wouldn’t take well to a stranger.
‘Maybe sometime in the future a solution will present itself, but for now I just can’t consider upping sticks and moving to France. I’m sorry, but that is how it is, Francine.’
‘Fair enough,’ she said flatly. ‘So it’s back to square one.’
‘I’m afraid so—and what about tomorrow?’
‘What about it? If you’re referring to me working part time at the surgery again, we’ve already had that discussion, Ethan. What time do you want me there?’
‘Eight o’clock, please.’
She was already turning to go and gave him a cool nod of agreement. before returning to the cottage to weep out her disappointment.
There were a few raised eyebrows amongst the staff when Dr Lomax’s chic French wife appeared the next morning with the news that she was about to join them in the capacity of part-time doctor.
When the man himself arrived looking somewhat frazzled after a sleepless night and having cut himself while shaving, she was already installed in the smallest of the consulting rooms after checking first that it wasn’t in use by anyone else. And now, after clearing the desk of a bit of clutter, Francine was seated behind it, waiting for Ethan to arrive.
Of the three practice nurses Jenna was delighted to see her installed at the surgery once more. Lucy, who had been at The Tides Practice for years and was as fiercely loyal to Ethan as she’d been to his predecessor, had been polite but not gushing, and young Maria, the trainee, had flashed her a shy smile when Francine had found the staff gathered in the surgery kitchen, drinking tea, until half past eight arrived when the doors would be opened and morning surgery would commence.
Christmas in Bluebell Cove Page 6