by Rhonda Bowen
JJ bit her lip. Of course this was going to be a problem! She was supposed to have a whole weekend more at home with her family, with Simon. Her vacation wasn’t supposed to be over so soon! But what kind of professional would she sound like if she said that to Andrew?
She took a deep breath. “I actually hadn’t planned to be back until Sunday . . .”
“We know,” Andrew said. “That’s why we are covering the cost of the earlier ticket.”
She heard a voice in the background and Andrew put her on hold. As she waited, JJ tried to think of all the ways she could get out of this tour extension and salvage the last remaining days of her time off. When Andrew came back on the line, she thought she had something.
“Look, Andrew, I know you need me back but—”
“JJ, I have to go,” Andrew said distractedly. “I’m just about to step into a meeting. Just check your e-mail and make sure you have the ticket. If not, call my office and they will take care of everything.”
“But, Andrew, I can’t come back tomorrow!” JJ protested. “Andrew? Andrew?”
He was gone.
She fell back on the bed and closed her eyes. This was turning into a terrible day.
“Trouble at work?” Sydney asked, stopping at JJ’s bedroom door as she buttoned up her blouse.
JJ flopped an arm over her eyes. “They want me back in LA tomorrow.”
“I thought you were here till Sunday!”
“I’m supposed to be,” JJ whined. “But they extended the tour, and they need me to sign contracts for the use of my song, and Rayshawn agreed to all of this without even telling me!”
“Rayshawn?”
“Yes, Rayshawn,” JJ growled. “My ex-boyfriend, current manager Rayshawn. Ugh, I could kill him!”
Sydney shook her head. “You know why he’s doing this, right?”
JJ groaned. “Yes.”
“You need to find new management,” Sydney said, rolling up the long sleeves of her shirt. “That man is going to have you over a barrel soon, if you don’t.”
“I need to find a lawyer first, to get me out of that contract,” JJ said, getting up. “But first I need to check my e-mail.”
“Good luck,” Sydney called as she disappeared down the hallway.
JJ crawled across the bed to the travel bag in which her laptop was still resting—probably uncharged. She was hanging off the side of the bed when Sydney stuck her head back in the room.
“Hey, wait. Did you say the tour was extended?” Sydney asked.
“Uh-huh.”
“But that means you won’t be here for—”
“Sheree’s delivery? Yeah, I thought about that,” JJ said. It was actually the first thing that had come to her mind when she heard about the extension. When the tour was first announced, she had worried about how close the end of the tour was to Sheree’s due date. If she went into labor early, JJ might not be there. But now, with the additional tour dates, it was almost certain that she’d miss the birth.
“Oh, JJ, she really is counting on you,” Sydney said, worry creeping into her voice. “I mean, Dean is more involved than before, but you’re the one who’s had the best relationship with her through this whole thing—”
“I know,” JJ said, cutting her sister off. “Trust me, I know.”
JJ sighed and flopped down on the bed, suddenly tired. In less than ten minutes, her day had gone from awesome to awful. Last night, she had been looking forward to her weekend. This morning, the thought of it brought her a headache.
Sydney leaned against the doorway. “You’re not looking forward to going back, are you?”
JJ didn’t have the energy to fake it. “No, not exactly.” Sydney bit her lip. “JJ, when the thing you love to do starts feeling like a burden and brings you anxiety, you should ask yourself if the way you’re doing it is the right way. You love singing. The fact that you’re dreading going back to a job that allows you to make a living doing what you love is something you should seriously think about.”
A couple minutes later, as JJ scanned through Andrew’s e-mail on her computer, the weight that had been sitting on her chest since she spoke to Andrew seemed to double. They had extended the tour to six more locations: Boston, Memphis, New Orleans, Houston, Denver, and then back to LA to end the tour. Furthermore, the tour extension stops were scheduled merely a day apart, as opposed to the more relaxed two-stops-a-week schedule that the previous section of the tour had run on. This meant they would play in Boston on Saturday and Sunday nights and then play in Memphis Tuesday and Wednesday. Friday and Saturday they would be in New Orleans. All six additional stops were crammed into two-and-a-half weeks.
Five-and-a-half more weeks of living on a tour bus and occasionally in hotels. Five-and-a-half more weeks of keeping Deacon’s secrets. Five-and-a-half more weeks of being antagonized by Sabrina, of avoiding drugs and alcohol, of not seeing her family, of not seeing Simon. Five-and-a-half more weeks. Could she do that? She wasn’t sure. Sydney’s words came back to her. When had she stopped loving, and started dreading, her job? Was it when Sabrina cut her guitar string? Was it when she was out that night looking for Deacon? Or was it when she was lying sick on a hotel bathroom floor in New York? When had this lifestyle lost the glitter that it once had? When had it become a burden?
She needed to talk to someone. She needed someone to help her make this decision. To tell her that this was her dream and that she shouldn’t let the tough moments overshadow the good ones. Someone to tell her that her voice was a gift from God and she had to use it. Someone to tell her that he would be there for her no matter what she decided, that he would come for her whenever she needed him.
But her someone was probably sleeping in, like she had planned to. And the truth was, she needed to make this decision on her own, with a clear head. For herself. For her future. Sure, her career wasn’t comfortable right now, but she had to start at the bottom and keep climbing until she got to a point where she could go it on her own, set her own rules, and make things the way she wanted them to be.
She closed her eyes and leaned back against the bed’s headboard.
“God, I don’t know what to do. You opened this door for me, allowed me to have a chance in this industry. But I’ve gone through so much hell so far. Now I have to make this decision: keep my promise to Sheree, or keep this commitment to my job. I want to do both, but I can’t. And then there’s Simon. I don’t know how we could ever work if we’re never in the same place. And I want to be where he is, but I want my career too. I don’t know what to do. Help me.”
She kept her eyes closed and waited. Waited for a light to shine above her head. Waited for the perfect solution to pop into her mind. Waited for something. Anything that would tell her what to do. But it was silent except for the faint sound of her sister in the bathroom down the hall.
She opened her eyes and slunk out of bed. Maybe the answer would come at some point, but in the meantime she had some people to see, and she was pretty sure none of them would like what she had to say.
Chapter 35
Rayshawn had perfected the art of disappearing. JJ had called all three of his cell phones, his office phone, and his home numbers without success. When she ended up at the Franklin and Forbes offices, his secretary could give her no help other than to let her know he would be out of town until the following week. Frustration bubbled through JJ as she exited the main lobby doors of the downtown Toronto high-rise where the office was housed. Rayshawn was avoiding her, but she would find him eventually, and when she did, he would get more than a piece of her mind.
In the meantime, however, she had less than twenty-four hours, and a lot to do. Her next stop—at the hospital to see Sheree—was successful, if success was measured by delivering her message to her sister-in-law. If success depended on a positive response to that message, then she sat at a total fail.
“What do you mean, you won’t be here for the delivery!”
JJ glanced at Sheree’s heart monit
or, worried that it might spike suddenly, but so far it was holding steady.
“They extended the tour,” JJ said, slipping into a chair next to Sheree’s bed. “I just found out a few hours ago.”
“But how can they just do that?” Sheree moaned. “Didn’t you sign a contract or something?”
JJ sighed. “I did. That’s why they’re calling me back early. I have to be in LA tomorrow morning to go over the changes.”
Sheree ran a hand over her face and JJ saw that the woman’s forehead was damp with perspiration. She had noticed that Sheree didn’t looked as relaxed as usual when she came in. There were bags under her eyes, and she lacked her usual energy and zeal. The pregnancy was getting to her. Probably the bed rest too. It couldn’t be easy, stuck on your back for most of the day, barely getting any sunshine, looking at the same four walls. Plus her stomach looked like it was about to pop. The woman kept shifting, trying to find a comfortable position.
“Are you okay?” JJ asked, helping Sheree adjust a pillow behind her head.
“No, I’m not okay,” Sheree grumbled. “I feel like an obese Oompa Loompa, and my butt feels numb half the day. Plus my tits are leaking like old balloons. Yesterday, Dean came in and I had two huge wet spots on my chest.”
JJ covered her mouth to stifle a giggle, but it slipped out anyway.
“You’re laughing at me!”
“I’m sorry,” JJ said, trying to hold back the laughter. “It’s just you . . . I can just picture you with Dean, and your hospital gown. . . What did he say?”
Sheree rolled her eyes. “Nothing. He just kept looking at my chest, which I can understand, ’cause these babies have increased in size since the last time he got a close look. But then he asked me if I was okay and pointed to my chest, and I nearly died.”
JJ’s voice shook as she asked, “Did you have to explain that it was normal?”
Sheree let out a chuckle. “Yeah, after he came back from dashing out of the room. You should have heard the excuse he made up. The poor man couldn’t deal.”
JJ snorted and Sheree let out a giggle. Before long they were both laughing.
“Aww, my brother,” JJ said when they finally settled down. “He’s not used to this stuff at all.”
“Don’t I know it,” Sheree said. “But after we talked about it, he was cool. Even asked me what other strange things I had to deal with. We had a good little chat.”
“I’m sorry, Sheree,” JJ said, touching her sister-in-law’s hand. “I can’t imagine how crazy your body must be now.”
“Trust me. You can’t.” She sighed. “I can’t wait to get this munchkin out of my belly. It’s time.”
“Three more weeks,” JJ said with a sigh. “And then it’s D-day. We’re almost there.”
“I thought you were going to be with me to the end, JJ,” Sheree said. The sadness that slipped into her voice was worse than the anger she’d expressed when JJ announced she would not be around for the delivery.
“I’m glad that Dean is here,” Sheree continued. “And he promised to be here for the delivery. But it’s you who has been here for me through all of it. Not even my crazy mama has shown her face, and she knows I’m pregnant.” Sheree grabbed JJ’s hand and held it tightly. “You’ve been like family to me. I can’t imagine you not being here for this.”
“God knows I feel terrible, Sheree,” JJ said. She sighed. “I wish I could somehow be here, but based on the draft schedule they sent me it doesn’t seem possible.”
Sheree nodded. “I understand.”
“Let’s not count it out yet, okay?” JJ said. “Maybe things will change between now and when I go back. I just wanted to give you a heads-up, just in case.”
“Heads up on what?”
JJ looked up to find her third and final appointment standing at the door.
“Dr. Massri!” Sheree exclaimed. “They told me you were off today. Should have known you would be with JJ. So I guess you’re mourning with me too?”
“Sheree—”JJ began, trying to cut her off. But it was too late.
“Mourning what?” Simon asked, stepping into the room. His intense, multicolored eyes looked more green than gold as he glanced between JJ and Sheree. He was dressed ultra-casual in khaki shorts and a short-sleeved plaid shirt, with his dreads only half pulled back. But the look was ultra-sexy to JJ, and all she wanted to do was slip into his arms and forget her problems for the rest of the day. But she had a feeling that after Simon heard her news, in his arms was the last place she would be welcomed.
“The tour extension,” Sheree said. She looked back and forth between JJ’s guilty expression and Simon’s surprised one. “Oh . . . you didn’t know.”
She turned a sheepish expression on JJ. “Sorry.”
But JJ was busy watching the look on Simon’s face. Apologies and questions were reflected in their eyes before either of them said a word.
“You had lunch yet?” Simon finally asked.
JJ shook her head.
“Give me a few minutes and we’ll go.” He turned toward Sheree. “Just thought I would stop by and see how my favorite patient’s doing.”
“Great!” Sheree said, the sarcasm dripping from her voice.
“Just feeling like a whale in a sauna, even with the AC cranked all the way up. Nothing a little delivery won’t solve.”
Simon smiled as he checked her charts, then the machines by her bedside. “Everything looks okay, so that’s good.”
“Thanks for checking in,” Sheree said with a smile. “I’m fine, really. I just can’t wait to have this baby.”
“Soon enough,” Simon said. “Anything I can get for you in the meantime? I may not have power like Janice, but I can pull a few strings here and there.”
Sheree chuckled. “I’m fine. Just take your girlfriend here out, and make sure she enjoys the rest of her time in Toronto.”
Simon glanced over at JJ, who was still sitting quietly next to Sheree. He cracked a smile that made JJ let out the breath she had been holding.
“I think I can manage that,” he said finally.
After they both said their good-byes, JJ and Simon slipped out of the hospital room into the hallway.
“Your car or mine?” JJ asked.
Simon took her hand gently, threading their fingers together. “Neither. Let’s walk for a bit.”
The day was turning out to be hot and humid, but JJ didn’t mind as they walked down University Avenue in the heart of downtown Toronto. She knew Simon didn’t mind it either. He loved the warm weather—probably more than she did. He didn’t say anything, just ran his thumb gently against hers. She leaned closer to him, occasionally resting her head against his shoulder. She felt in place, just like she always did with Simon. Like she was exactly where she needed to be, and she didn’t need anything else.
They found a tiny Vietnamese restaurant that was so narrow there was only room for a single row of tables. They opted for the back patio, where they sat next to each other and deliberated over whether it was too hot for curry. When their order of rice-paper rolls and banana-blossom salad arrived, the real conversation began.
“Andrew called me this morning and told me they are extending the tour,” JJ began, deciding to go straight to the heart of the matter. “They already bought me a ticket. I fly back tomorrow morning.”
“So you already agreed?” Simon asked, pausing from his meal to look up at her.
JJ sighed. “I didn’t have a chance to disagree. The agreement was already drawn up, and apparently when they couldn’t reach me, they reached Rayshawn and he gave them the okay . . .”
“Rayshawn?” Simon asked, his left eyebrow rocketing up to his hairline. “I thought you told me you were done with that guy.”
“Personally, yes,” JJ said, hating that she had to talk about Rayshawn with Simon again. “But professionally he’s still my manager, and I’m still under contract.”
“So you’re telling me that this man is still going to be in your life?”<
br />
JJ sighed again and put down her chopsticks. “Yes. Until my contract is over.”
“And how long is that?”
“Six months.”
Simon pushed his plate away and took a long gulp of water. When he put his glass down, he still wouldn’t look at JJ. The blank expression that she remembered from the first time they had discussed Rayshawn slipped onto his features.
“Simon.” She touched his arm. “I didn’t ask for this. I don’t want it. But this is my job.”
He rubbed his chin, even as his jaw tensed. “How long is the extension?”
“Three more weeks.”
He turned to look at her. “So that’s what Sheree was talking about. You won’t be here for her delivery.”
“It doesn’t look that way. Not unless the birth of her baby fits perfectly into the week we are scheduled to perform in Toronto.”
“She was really counting on you, JJ,” Simon said.
JJ ran her hands through her hair. “I know. I feel like the worst aunt in the world.” She bit her lip. “At least I know you will be there for her.”
She reached over and slipped her hand under his dreads to the nape of his neck. “I am so glad you said yes when I asked you to stay. For more reasons than one.”
He smiled. “Trying to butter me up, Miss Isaacs?”
She smiled back. “Is it working?”
He reached for one of the rolls. “Lucky for you, you don’t have to try very hard.”
She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. “I am really, really getting used to having you around, Simon Massri. You sure you don’t want to come on tour with me? You can be my personal bodyguard.”
“The way things are going, you might need one soon.” He nodded toward the doors, where two young women were trying to be discreet as they stared at JJ and whispered.
“They’re just jealous ’cause I have a hot boyfriend,” JJ teased. She chuckled as she saw a tinge of pinkness color Simon’s fairer skin.
“Eat,” he said, handing her the chopsticks she had discarded. “That should keep both of us out of trouble for a while.”