Chapter 3
Rayne wandered the gardens, following the meandering path through the various plants. It was a beautiful area, but she wasn’t seeing the huge flowers or interesting cacti. Her thoughts centered on this morning. And last night. And the kisses she’d shared with Kular.
She remembered her fury over his outrageous comments last night. This morning, she’d thought him a hustler, and for good reason! So, what in the world had happened over breakfast? Why had those tender feelings for the man so completely overwhelmed her hostility and…yes, her fears? It simply wasn’t logical that she could order the man to stop staring at her one moment, then tell him about her mother’s death minutes later.
Logic. It was a comforting word. When they’d come home the afternoon of her mother’s funeral to find the contents of their home out on the curb, drenched by the rain, her world hadn’t made sense. When they’d slept in a homeless shelter that night, she and her sisters curled up so close to each other that they’d looked like a pile of arms and limbs, her world had felt chaotic. Rayne hadn’t slept that night, standing guard over Sloane and Pepper, not wanting anything bad to happen to either of them. She’d glared at anyone who had dared to approach their tiny corner of the world, but nothing had made sense.
Slowly, they’d saved money. Rayne had spent almost every night babysitting during those months, ignoring her homework in deference to earning what little money she could so that they could earn enough money to put a security deposit on a small apartment. Those days and weeks had been horrifically chaotic.
“What’s wrong?” Pepper asked, linking arms with Rayne.
Rayne smiled, bumping her shoulder companionably into Pepper’s. “Do you remember those nights in the shelter?”
Pepper shuddered at the memory. “Every moment,” she whispered. This wasn’t a subject they talked loudly about, the shame of those months too intense. “I hated that place.”
“Yeah, but it was better than sleeping on the street.”
“True,” Pepper replied. “Why are you thinking about that right now?”
Rayne wasn’t sure why. “I don’t know. I was just…it was difficult and…well, things are changing. For all of us.”
Pepper leaned her head against Rayne’s shoulder. “True. But…for the better, right?”
Was it? She was leaving. Pepper was leaving. Sloane would be alone. “I don’t know.” She sniffed slightly. “I just…It’s going to be different. What if…” she paused, thinking back to those scary nights. “What if one of us has a crisis, like that first night? We won’t be together anymore. We won’t have each other to rely on.”
Pepper stopped, pulling Rayne to a stop as well. “We will always be there for each other!” she said adamantly. “We’ve been through fire,” she told Rayne. “We’re a family and, no matter what happens, we will always be together. We might be thousands of miles away, but if you ever need me, you call. Do you understand?”
Rayne felt that sense of peace descend on her once more. “Thank you!” she whispered, pulling her sister in for a hug. “Back at ya, little sis.”
Pepper’s hug was amazingly soothing. “Come on,” Pepper urged. “We’ve lost Sloane and Josh again. We need to keep an eye on those two. I think they are finally starting to see each other as male and female.”
“Finally,” Rayne laughed.
They hurried their steps, moving forward along the pathway.
Unfortunately, no matter how hard she tried, Rayne still couldn’t make sense of her new feelings for Kular. Her feelings just weren’t logical! How could she have gone from thinking he was a charming con artist one moment, to liking the guy, and then to feeling intense anger towards him and his high handed actions, to…well, thinking of him differently…so quickly? She was sure that he was some sort of con man, but he was an incredibly sexy con man. What was his angle though? What in the world could he be trying to get out of her? He had to know that she didn’t have any money. She’d told him that she’d just finished school and hadn’t yet started her new job.
Logic, she thought as she paused at an overlook, gazing out at the sparkling ocean. “What’s his plan?”
But even as she thought it, Rayne went back to the illogical part of her feelings. It didn’t matter who or what Kular was. The more confusing thing was why she wasn’t angry with him.
Could these feelings simply be the result of her life’s imminent transition? She’d finished one phase of her life, so now she wanted a moment’s excitement before she settled down to her job and career?
That made sense. But her feelings towards Kular, towards a man she suspected was perhaps a thief or…or someone who does illegal things…didn’t make sense. If she suspected that he was working her as a target of his scam, then why would she allow her feelings to become involved?
That didn’t make sense!
Turning, she leaned her back against the railing, watching Sloane who was speaking to Pepper. Things were changing for all them, she thought again. Yes, everything was changing, including herself, and that terrified her on some level. She was no longer a student. She was going to be a professional. She had a job, her own apartment. She’d buy a car once she had enough money…or maybe not. A car was a huge expense. She’d purposely selected an apartment that was close to public transportation, so a car wasn’t strictly necessary. Yes, she’d won a lot of money in Monaco, but she’d applied all of her winnings to her college debts. And still, she had more to pay off! So no, a new car wasn’t high on her priority list at the moment.
But maybe a new lover? A man who stirred her senses…who was different from the other men she’d ever met?
Yes, that made sense, she realized. Kular was different from the other students in her classes or in the odd jobs she’d worked over the years. The high school boys hadn’t interested her because she’d been so terrified that they might learn of the secret shame of their homelessness. In college, she’d been too overwhelmed with maintaining her grade point average so that she could keep her scholarships, not to mention earning money to contribute to the food fund as well as buying her books.
She’d never had time for men in the past. But now…she looked up at the amazingly blue sky and breathed in the fresh, ocean air. Now she was free. She could live a little, release those tight restrictions she’d always maintained on her life and…live.
Could she do it? Could she relax just a bit and experience what other women had enjoyed for years? Could she have a fling with a man that stirred her senses?
Yes, Rayne thought. She didn’t want to be frightened any longer. That was the other side of the argument. For so long, she’d been frightened. Terrified of being evicted again, scared of someone finding out what they’d gone through, afraid of…everything! She’d been terrified of her and her sisters losing their home again, or maybe their car dying and not being able to get to work, or not having enough food, of spending money because…any of those things might happen again if she wasn’t vigilant, frugal, and very, very careful!
Straightening her shoulders, Rayne tilted her head upwards, enjoying the warmth of the sun for a brief moment. Not too long because her skin would burn and blister, but for just a moment, she let herself soak in the sun’s wonderful warmth. Closing her eyes, she considered her options. It would be so easy to go and be with Kular tonight, to revel in his charm. Or Rayne could play it safe, stay away from him and hide in Josh’s suite, ignore the allure of a charming, sophisticated man.
For so long, she’d remained in her safe, comfortable zone, never venturing outside the confines of the strict rules she’d created for her life, rules that would protect her future and her sisters. But here in Monaco, where everything was beautiful, warm, and amazing, perhaps she could lower her guard for just a little while. One night. Just one sweet, wonderful, exhilarating night.
And maybe her subconscious had already done so. Over breakfast this morning, sitting with Kular across the table from her, Rayne suspected that she’d already made her dec
ision. She’d changed the way she’d thought about him, going from anger and fear this morning, fear of the unknown, fear of what he might think of her, and…fear of what she might think of herself if she gave in to the strange sensations he stirred inside of her…to acceptance that she was a female with normal desires.
With the decision made, her body relaxed. Lowering her face, she tugged on the brim of her hat to ensure that her face was shadowed. She might have decided to be with Kular tonight, but he wouldn’t want her if she showed up looking like a lobster.
Smiling, she moved to Pepper’s side. Sloane, as usual, had gone to stand with Josh. The two of them always stood close together and they probably had no idea that they looked and acted like a couple, even though they were pretending to be simply employer and employee.
“They’re doing it again, aren’t they?” Pepper whispered, bending to smell a pretty pink flower.
“Yep!” she replied, stifling her laughter. “They’ll figure out that they are madly in love one of these days.”
Pepper straightened with a huge grin, sighing as she gazed at the people in question. “I certainly hope so.”
For the rest of the afternoon, Rayne considered her decision, analyzing it from every angle to make sure she wasn’t convincing herself that she wanted to be with Kular for an illogical reason. If she was going to do this, she was going to approach tonight with her eyes wide open. She walked alongside her sisters and Josh, but she wasn’t really with them. Not mentally. Nope, she was playing out all the possible ways in which tonight might happen.
Chapter 4
Rayne felt as if the exhaustion and heat was going to win and drag her down into its oppressive clutches. They had spent the day touring through Monaco’s various gardens and churches, cramming as much sightseeing into the day as possible. The effort had been easier because of Josh, who had arranged for a car and driver to take them around the city. Even so, the day had still been hot and filled with walking. Plus, because of her pale skin and its irritating tendency to burn at the slightest provocation, Rayne was covered in a thick layer of sunscreen, so she felt miserably sticky and hot.
But as soon as she stepped into the cool air of the hotel, her fatigue vanished as she scanned the lobby for Kular. Would he be here? Waiting for her? They hadn’t actually made arrangements for tonight. He’d offered suggestions for their activities, but had he set a time or a meeting place? She couldn’t quite remember. Not after the way he’d kissed her last night! She’d been a bit…confused, to say the least.
“Looking for someone?” Josh asked, his sharp, green eyes focused on her.
Rayne jumped. “How did you…?” she stopped, not finishing the guilty response that had almost popped out. But she hadn’t realized he was by her side. “Um…no. Just enjoying the air conditioning after a day out in the sunshine.” She was becoming quite adept at lying, Rayne realized guiltily, and glanced up at Josh and…nope. She clearly wasn’t that adept, because Josh obviously didn’t believe her.
Shifting her feet, she met his gaze. She had nothing to be ashamed of. Her plans for the night weren’t illegal or immoral. She was a perfectly normal woman who was looking forward to spending some time with an amazingly attractive man.
Not that she was going to admit that to Josh! No way! Josh wouldn’t leave her side if he even suspected that she might be anticipating time with a man!
“I’m looking forward to a shower,” she said, leaving off the part about her plans after the shower. He didn’t reply immediately as they walked over to the elevators. Rayne cringed under his scrutiny, so she did what any reasonable person would do under the circumstances. She distracted him. “Where’s Sloane? Is she okay?”
Josh looked away, searching for Rayne’s sister. Upon finding her standing next to Pepper as the two of them waited for the elevator, his shoulders relaxed ever so slightly. Rayne smiled, thinking that it would be wonderful if her sister and Josh ever figured out that they were madly in love.
But then Josh’s suspicious gaze swung back to her. He clearly knew that she’d just tried to distract him. Darn it, he was good!
Thankfully, the elevator doors opened at that moment and they stepped inside. When she turned to face the doors again, Rayne’s eyes did one final sweep of the lobby and that’s when she saw him! Kular! He was walking across the lobby, surrounded by several other men, talking briskly. Goodness, he looked fabulous! Powerfully built and edgily focused on whatever he was discussing with the others.
Then the elevator doors closed shut and she felt her body relax. It should probably worry her that just a simple glance at the man could put her body on high alert. But over the course of the past several hours, she’d come to a decision. She was going to make love…um…have sex…with Kular tonight. They were scheduled to leave tomorrow, so this would be her last night in Monaco and she wanted to experience Kular’s touch, his kisses, and learn what it was like to be in his arms. She wanted to know what it felt like to be a woman!
Yes, she’d have to be careful. The women in her family were surprisingly fertile. Sloane called it freakish and had repeatedly warned them to never rely on just one form of birth control. Condoms weren’t enough, she’d said over and over. Condoms failed and the Abbot sisters needed to be on a second form of birth control.
Granted, Sloane was probably right. Their grandmother had gotten pregnant at eighteen with their mother. And her mother had gotten pregnant three times by three different men. As soon as those men had learned of their impending fatherhood, they’d disappeared, never to be heard from again.
Rayne knew that she needed to be careful. But her periods had always been like clockwork. And she knew that the best time to get pregnant was about two weeks ago, since her period was due on Tuesday. She’d actually groaned about that fact with Sloane and Pepper, because that was going to be her first day at her new job. Not the best time, but it also made this time of the month the least likely for her to conceive. So, the timing was perfect!
Yes, she knew the rhythm method was less than ideal for birth control. But using the rhythm method plus a condom would work. She could do this!
She showered and pulled on a pair of shorts and tee shirt, telling the others that she was going to pass on going out to dinner. “I’m tired,” she told the others. “I was up later than you guys last night.”
She saw a flash of something pass over Sloane’s face and wondered about it, but didn’t ask. Josh was looking at Sloane as well and…oh my! They looked as if…as if something had finally happened between them! Had they finally come to the realization that they were meant for each other? Rayne could only hope!
When everyone finally left, Rayne hurried back to her room and changed into a dress. Just a simple black sheath, but she added a pearl necklace that Josh had given her for her high school graduation. Piling her hair up on top of her head, she curled several tendrils, letting them float down her back. Adding a bit more makeup than usual, she looked at her appearance in the mirror.
Did she look sophisticated? A woman of the world?
Rayne grimaced. “Not really,” she groaned. “But this is the best I can do.”
With that, she grabbed a clutch purse and walked out of the suite. Taking the elevator down to the lobby, she stepped out and looked around. Kular hadn’t told her what time to meet her and they hadn’t exchanged contact information. So, she couldn’t even text him to let him know that she was here.
“Bar,” she muttered through numb lips. Oh my, she was nervous! Good grief, when was the last time she’d been nervous? Rayne lived her life through a series of rules established through logical thought processes. She was good at thinking through situations with logic and calm precision, both of which tended to eliminate the emotional factor.
Rayne wasn’t used to feeling so confused. Logic wasn’t scary. Logic made sense. This nervousness…it made her feel vulnerable. And she definitely didn’t like feeling vulnerable. In fact, she was so nervous, she considered just turning around a
nd going back up to Josh’s suite, downloading a book and snuggling onto the soft, comfortable couch to read.
Yes, that seemed like a much better idea!
Rayne turned on her heel, prepared to simply head right back up to Josh’s suite and abandon her plan of making…having sex…with Kular.
Instead, she ran right into a hard, powerful chest. Strong arms immediately caught her, stopping her from falling.
“Kular!” she gasped, tilting her head back to look up at him.
“I’ve been waiting for you,” he murmured, his eyes moving over her hair and face while his hands slid sensuously along her waist, coming to rest on her hips.
She blinked, wishing she could stop trembling. Rayne didn’t want to appear weak. She wanted to be seen as strong and vital, powerfully feminine.
“You were?” she asked, wanting to sound coquettish, but Rayne wasn’t a coquette. She was practical and logical. Oh, how she’d wished she’d learned the delicate art of flirting!
“Yes. I have a table over here,” he said, lacing his fingers through hers and leading her towards a table in the corner. It was dimly lit, and very private, out of the way of the main bar where most of the hotel and casino guests congregated.
“This is nice,” she replied nervously, sliding into the booth. She noticed that he’d already ordered a bottle of wine.
“Wine?”
Rayne debated briefly. On the one hand, she wanted to make decisions based on logic and clear thinking, and on the other hand, she was nervous and a glass of wine might calm her nerves.
“You hesitate. Why? And why are you so nervous tonight? You’ve been a spitfire all the other times we’ve talked.”
Rayne licked her lips, not sure how to explain without revealing too much of herself. “I want to be honest with you, Kular,” she told him, looking down at her hands. “But I also need to protect myself from your brand of…well, whatever. You’re very overwhelming, Kular.”
Pregnant With the Sheik's Heir (The Abbot Sisters Book 2) Page 5