Kinky Wolf

by Aidy Award

  This time he wasn't going anywhere. He wanted Zara. He wanted more. So much more.

  His mind raced round and round between hoping that being near her would be good for him, and knowing his own darkness could bring her down into his murky self-hatred. He would not do that to her. Not even to save himself.

  Maybe the tiniest of interactions would be enough to sustain him for a little while. He could just say hello, bring her a drink. He was part owner of the bar after all.

  He didn't even know what Zara liked to drink. Was she a martini girl? Shots didn't seem her style. Beer? Was he completely overthinking this? Yes... Yes, he was. He’d make her an old fashioned. There was something stylish and sophisticated about it and the sweet almond flavor of smooth whiskey reminded him of her kisses.

  Goddess, her kisses. His mouth watered, and he saw stars for a second just thinking about touching his mouth to hers, tangling their tongues, and hearing her soft little moans when he teased her in all the ways she loved.

  He really needed to get his head out of the gutter or he was going to have to hide behind the bar for the rest of the night just to keep the fucking tent in his pants from scaring away the rest of the patrons. His scowl would likely do the trick anyway. He took a couple of deep breaths and concentrated on creating the perfect drink.

  He selected just the right glasses, splashed his dash of bitters over the sugar cubes, found perfectly square blocks of ice, poured just the right amount of whiskey over each, and dropped in the perfect curls of orange zest. It took most of his concentration. Through every single step he kept Zara in the corner of his eye.

  She sat at a table with Galyna, and while her friend was clearly elated to see her, Zara kept her arms folded around herself and her eyes flitted about as if looking for something or someone.

  That churning in his gut returned. Was she here for a date?

  Niko may not have his wolf, but he'd still rip the throat out of any man who touched her. He didn't even like his own brothers smiling at her. One more way he was clearly a pig. He couldn't have Zara, but he sure as shit didn't want anyone else to.

  P.

  I.

  G.

  She wasn't a possession.

  She wasn't his.

  Even though every cell in his body screamed mine.

  Niko picked up the two drinks he'd made and swallowed each in a gulp. It would take a hell of a lot more than a couple of shots of whiskey to get him drunk. A couple of bottles might do it.

  He'd been that route. Drinking his way into oblivion was difficult for a shifter. Damn metabolisms were too fast. The little bit of numbness from drinking a shit-ton of hard alcohol was nothing compared to one night spent fantasizing about Zara. Both were torture, one sweet and one bitter.

  Okay. Fine. He was going to talk to her. Not about anything specific. He'd just say hi. He knew better than to ask how she'd been. He hated it when people asked how he was doing. She'd been through her own battles. If she was lucky, she'd come through it all a whole hell of a lot better than he had.

  If he was really lucky, he could help her get through it. They'd get through their battles together.

  Niko threw the drinks together again and walked toward the table where she and Gal sat. He could do this and not make a complete ass of himself. Probably.

  "Hey. Thought you two looked thirsty." Suave, he was not. But he hadn't sounded like a total douchepotato. He set the drinks down, one in front of each of the ladies.

  Zara's eyes went wide and she grabbed the cocktail in front of Galyna. She stared at it for a second like it was a ticking time bomb and then downed the whole thing in two hard gulps.

  "Okay," Gal said warily. "I guess this one is mine."

  "No," Zara practically shouted and snatched up the second glass, downing it a little too fast so that dribbles of the drink ran down the sides of her mouth. She grimaced and then burped. 'Sorry. Guess I was thirsty."

  Or an alcoholic. Geez. "Uh. I guess I'll make you another one, Gal."

  Zara stood up, grabbed his arms and said, "I'll help."

  Her touch sent surges of heat through his arm. He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from wrapping his arms around her just to feel her warmth on his cold, damned soul. Instead, he let her lead him across the place and back to the hallway toward the supply room. Whoa. Where was she taking him and why?

  She dragged him straight into the room where he'd imagined having her on her knees for him just a few moments before, and his cock came springing back to life.

  He hadn't gotten hard like this without a lot of spit and stroking in a long time, before tonight, and now he was on hard-on number two within in the span of five minutes. At least he knew the fucking thing still had some life in it. "Zara, where are we going?"

  "To get some bottles of water. You can't let Galyna drink any alcohol."

  "Sweetheart, we have water behind the bar." The second he called her that, he knew it was a mistake.

  She dropped his arm and shook her hand. "Why is your skin so hot? And don't call me that. I haven't been your sweetheart for a long time."

  She would always be his sweetheart. Niko mentally gagged at his own syrupy thoughts. Zara wasn't his at all. No matter how much he thought she should be. Wait... That didn't come out how he meant it to. No matter how much he wanted her to be.

  Shit. Snort snort.

  Add that to the list of his flaws because he did believe that, all the way to his core.

  Because if she was, he would treasure her, pleasure her, and make sure she knew she was cherished. Not like he'd done a good job of that last time. He needed to walk away right now. Screw the remnants of feelings he had for Zara, fuck the desire to take her and shove her up against the wall and scrape his teeth across her throat while he pinned her hands over her head.

  He was so fucked.

  Flirting and Other Dangerous Games

  "Niko?" Something was wrong. His eyes had gone all dark and then he'd gotten this blank sort of absent look of shock on his face. She could totally relate, It wasn't like schizophrenia was contagious, so it had to be something else distracting him.

  He blinked and swallowed. "Huh?"

  "Bottled water? For Galyna."

  "Right." Niko led her back toward the bar, but paused at the end of the hallway. He quirked his head to the side like a puppy, wondering what she was thinking. "Why can't she have a drink?"

  Crapballs. He wasn't supposed to ask questions like that. Zara needed to be more careful about how and who she interacted with. Her brain played too many tricks on her to keep things straight.

  "I can't tell you." Because Niko did not need to see how batshit crazy she was. She couldn't tell him she'd had a vision of Gal pregnant. With twins. The whole idea was incredibly dumb. Believing it was true was extra stupid. Making a fuss and dragging Niko into it was beyond foolish.

  If she was going to convince everyone that she didn't need to be in the hospital and make sure they weren't keeping tabs on her all the time, she'd have to be better at hiding her reactions to what her mind told her was real. Gal was not pregnant with twins. Standing here in a hallway with a sexy man was.

  Niko stepped closer to her and stared down into her eyes. "You can tell me anything. If you can't tell me, who can you?"

  His muscles bunched in his arms like he was moving to wrap her up in them. He clenched his hands into fists and shoved them into his pockets.

  What would it be like to be snuggled up in his warm embrace again? To confide in the one man she used to share all her hopes and dreams with? For just a minute she'd like to unburden herself and let him take care of her.

  She could never do that.

  "I don't think so. Just because we dated in high school doesn't mean anything." Whoa. Was that really how she felt? He wasn’t just some ex-boyfriend from high school. They'd been engaged. For like twenty minutes. Then they'd gone and told his parents and within the hour, they were no longer engaged.

  A week later he'd gone to Russia. R
ush-uhh, for goodness sake. Zara had never thought she'd even see him again. The way his dad made it sound, he was basically emigrating. Maybe that had simply been a ploy to make her give him up easier.

  She had given him up. It had not been easy. She didn't want to go through all of that again. Not with him, not with anyone. Besides, she had some other things to take care of in which she wasn't going to involve him or anyone else she loved.

  Shoot. She hadn't meant that. She didn't love Niko.

  Very much.

  Until she found a way to mete out justice on Ramsey Crescent, she couldn't afford to love anyone. Maybe even once she'd killed him, put a final stop to his human trafficking schemes, and rescued the rest of the women he'd taken, then she could think about moving on with her own life.

  "Zara. I can't change what happened. I wish I could go back and do a lot of things very differently. I am sorry for hurting you." There was the tiniest tremble in his voice that tugged at her heart strings, playing a tune she didn’t want to hear right now.

  She only had so much emotional bandwidth and taking down Ramsey Crescent had to take all of her focus. "Coming here tonight was a mistake. I can't do this."

  The back door to the bar was at the end of the hallway they were in and it made a convenient escape. She could easily walk home. The little house she used to share with Heli and Gal was only a short walk from Rogue's historic old town district. She'd be fine on her own. "I gotta go."

  She darted down the hall, pushed out the back door, and stepped into the cool night air. The door shut behind her with a click, and she closed her eyes, taking in a long, slow breath. One more minute in close quarters with Niko, and she was either going to slap him for no good reason or kiss him for a million bad ones.

  It would be best if she didn't see him again. Like ever. An uncomfortable hollow opened up around her heart. Fine. That was better than the fear of him seeing her mental instability, or exposing him to the dangers of her plan to take down Ramsey Crescent.

  No, it was better to tackle both of those things alone. Starting right now.

  Zara took one step into the dark alley and then heard the door open behind her.

  "Don't move a muscle, solnyshka. You aren't walking home alone. I'll go with you and keep you safe."

  Sigh... She'd be mad if that wasn't really damn sexy. She was a strong, independent woman for goodness sake. She didn't need a big bad man to keep her safe.

  Except, she really liked knowing he was there with her. Eye roll to herself. "What took you so long?"

  He chuckled softly under his breath and stepped up beside her. "Sorry. I went to tell Gal not to worry because I was taking you home."

  "She gave you a high five, didn't she?" Zara didn't need psychotic visions or even psychic ones to have a clear picture of that happening.

  The twinkle in his eye, the one that made her legs go a little wobbly, told her everything she needed to know. He gave her nose a little boop. "Maybe."

  The teenage part of her told her to swat his hand away. The weary grown-up said it was cute, and she should take all the affection she could get while she could get it. Because there would be no nose boops in jail... or hell. Whichever was the consequence for killing a very bad man. "Why is everyone in my life conspiring against me?"

  She loved that Gal was happy for her and Niko to get back together, which might be partially a product of Gal dating Niko’s younger brother. Gal was probably privy to more of what had been happening in Niko’s life than she was. Fine. That didn’t bother her. Much. What she didn’t want was for everyone to worry about her. That meant they would be watching her, and she needed to do a better job of making them think everything was back to normal.

  Niko slid his hand into hers and gave it a squeeze. "Maybe we're conspiring for you."

  The hollow in her chest from a few minutes ago filled in with a warmth she remembered from a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. He didn't need to know that she secretly craved his touch and wanted him to put his hands all over her. Nope... Definitely not. "I'm not going to dignify that with a response."

  "Come on, let's get you home and tucked into bed." He slipped a strand of hair behind her ear, and his eyes flashed to her lips and then up to her eyes.

  Was that... no. Even if it was an offer to take her to bed, she wasn't going to let him into the house, much less into her pants or her heart. So she pretended not to notice the innuendo in his sentence and stared straight ahead, at his wide chest and big ole muscles. Eep. Maybe that wasn't the right place to focus her attention. Too tempting.

  As much as she still felt the old hurts and had some unresolved anger at him for leaving, it would be so easy to fall into Niko's arms and let him take care of her, take care of everything. Now that he was back, the whole town probably expected them to pick back up where they left off. Obviously, her friends did.

  She doubted his parents wanted that. Well, she'd save them the worry. She'd already committed herself to a different path that only included helping those who couldn't help themselves. Starting with the women in the Crescent stronghold. The sooner she found Ramsey Crescent and his weaknesses, the better.

  They walked toward the Reserve in silence. This time it wasn't awkward, but an underlying tension zinged between the two of them, a lot like before a first kiss. That wasn't something she'd experienced in far too long. Zara absorbed every little bit of joy she could get out of the moment. She would be denying herself any more, starting as soon as possible, so this had to sustain her for a long time.

  She would dig into those plans tomorrow. There were a few things to look into and some paperwork to do to make sure no one else in her family could be held liable for her actions or lose anything if she were to get caught. The law would not look kindly on her taking justice into her own hands, but that couldn't be helped.

  Just in case she did get away with it, she needed to set up some kind of foundation, a 501(c)3 non-profit to help not only the women Crescent had trafficked, but others like them. Zara wasn’t going to stand for anyone treating women that way. She’d become an angel of death if she had to.

  "I'd love to know what's got your big ole brain whirling right now." Niko stopped them on the sidewalk where the path split. One way led to the walking trails that crisscrossed the Reserve and the other skirted the outside of the park. The open space closed at dusk and most people followed that law. There were long held rumors of wolves running around in the Reserve, even though local law enforcement denied it.

  Wolves. Goosebumps rose up all across her skin and she shivered. Why did it have to be wolves? "Nothing important, just thinking about all the things I need to do tomorrow."

  Niko led her toward the path that went straight into the dark forest like they were on a light and breezy summer walk. "Want help?"

  "No." The cracking of a twig sounded from somewhere behind them. Big dangerous predators or her imagination? "What was that?"

  Niko glanced in the direction of the sound and smiled softly, pulling her along the dirt trail, not giving any danger a second thought. "Nothing to be worried about. I got you. You're safe with me."

  Her eyes darted everywhere waiting for the visions to start. This was exactly the kind of situation that would spike her stress levels. She'd start seeing monsters any second now. She hated that her knees and voice were equally wobbly. "You're not worried about the wild animals that live here and hunt in the dark?"

  "Not even a little." Niko pulled her into his side, wrapping one arm around her shoulders protectively.

  God, to have his complete confidence. Especially in the face of evil, dark forests filled with creepy beasts who wanted to eat their faces. The only reason she wasn’t a slathering mess of nerves curled into a little ball was his complete lack of fear. She drew on it and wobbled a little less inside. "Why not?"

  He winked at her. "I can't tell you."

  Oh, come on. She maybe grinned just a little bit. "You said we could tell each other anything."

  "N
o." He poked her in the shoulder. "I said you could tell me anything. You didn't."

  "You're infuriating." She was not going to giggle and flirt with her ex-boyfriend. Not even a little bit. Instead, she scowled at him. Hard. "I don't remember you being such a smartass, smartass."

  He scowled back, and it was so fake, she almost laughed out loud. He must have noticed because he narrowed his eyes even more. "Oh. I always was. I just tempered it for you."

  Yeah right. He was yanking her chain. "I don't believe that for a second."

  "You don't? Well, fuck.I guess I gotta up my game for you,"

  That actually made her laugh for real this time. He was being adorably cute and yet totally sexy at the same time. "You're a schmoe."

  He stopped and brushed his lips across her forehead. "You're home."

  Wait... What? Sure enough, they were standing on the sidewalk in front of her house. He'd distracted her with his horrible flirting for the entire part of the walk through the deep dark forest with all the mean beasties. "Oh. Umm. Thanks."

  She shuffled her feet. Niko was actually a good guy who smelled so good, and she wanted to invite him in. She couldn't though. Because she'd jump his bones.

  That was not part of the plan. Niko was throwing a serious wrench in said plan. Just being around him was making her think about a different life. She wanted to invite him in, pretend all of their past history was just that... history. They could wrap themselves up in each other and be perfectly happy reigniting the flame that was only banked inside of her.

  But then there were those women that needed her help. So no. She wasn't going to invite him in. Not into her house, not into her life. No matter how much her soul wanted her too.

  "Thanks for walking me home." Zara glanced up at Niko, kind of expecting him to be surprised at the rebuff since they'd been having fun just a moment before. He wasn't even looking at her. Something else had caught his attention and whatever it was, wasn't good.