by Amanda Quick
Initially she had been delighted to find him there, eager to have him see that she could handle herself in his world. But after the first dance it had dawned on her that Julian had not bothered to drop in at the Yelvertons’ ball just to admire her newfound ability to socialize. He had come because he was worried she would get swept off her feet by one of the predatory males who prowled the sophisticated jungle of the ton.
It was very depressing to realize that only Julian’s natural possessiveness had kept him by her side for the rest of the evening.
They had arrived home an hour ago and Sophy had gone immediately upstairs to prepare for bed. Julian had not tried to delay her. He had bid her a formal good night and vanished into the library. A few minutes ago Sophy had heard his muffled footsteps in the carpeted hall outside her room.
The glow of excitement engendered by her first major evening in Society was fading rapidly and as far as Sophy was concerned it was mostly Julian’s fault. He had definitely done his best to dampen the buoyant pleasure she had been experiencing.
Sophy turned at the far end of the room and paced back toward her dressing table. She caught sight of the small jewelry case revealed in the candlelight and stopped short aware of a strong flicker of guilt. There was no denying that during the hectic excitement of her first week in town as the Countess of Ravenwood, she had temporarily put aside her goal of vengeance for Amelia. Salvaging her marriage had loomed as the most important matter in her world.
It was not that she had forsaken her vow to find Amelia’s seducer, Sophy told herself, it was just that other things had taken priority.
But as soon as she had established a proper relationship with Julian, she would return to the project of finding the man responsible for Amelia’s death.
“I have not forgotten you, dear sister,” Sophy whispered.
She was lifting the lid of the jewelry case when the door opened behind her. She swung around with a sharp intake of breath and saw Julian standing in the doorway that connected their rooms. He was wearing his dressing gown and nothing else. The jewelry case lid dropped shut with a snap.
Julian glanced at the small case and then met Sophy’s eyes. He smiled wryly. “You need not say a word, my dear. I got the point earlier this evening. Forgive me for failing to remember to supply you with the little trinkets you will need to dress properly here in town.”
“I was not about to ask you for jewelry, my lord,” Sophy said, annoyed. Honestly, the man did have a way of making the most irritating assumptions. “Was there something you wanted?”
He hesitated a moment, making no move to come farther into the room. “Yes, I believe there is,” he said finally. “Sophy, I have been giving much thought to the matter of the unsettled business between us.”
“Business, my lord?”
His eyes narrowed. “You would prefer me to be more blunt? Very well, I have given a great deal of consideration to the matter of consummating our marriage.”
Sophy’s stomach suddenly felt the way it had one day long ago when she had fallen out of a tree into a stream. “I see. I suppose it was all that talk about sheep breeding earlier at the Yelvertons’ that brought the subject to mind?”
Julian stalked toward her, his hands shoved into the pockets of his dressing gown. “This has nothing to do with sheep. Tonight I realized for the first time that your lack of personal experience of the marriage bed puts you at grave risk.”
Amelia blinked in amazement. “Risk, my lord?”
He nodded soberly. He picked up a crystal swan ornament from her dressing table and turned it idly in his hand. “You are too naive and far too innocent, Sophy. You do not have the sort of worldly knowledge a woman must have in order to understand the nuances and double entendres certain men employ in conversation. You are too likely to lead such men on unknowingly simply because you do not understand their true meaning.”
“I think I begin to comprehend your reasoning, my lord,” Sophy said. “You feel that the fact that I am not yet a proper wife in every sense of the word may be a handicap for me socially?”
“In a manner of speaking.”
“What a dreadful notion. Rather like the idea of eating one’s fish with the wrong fork, I imagine.”
“A bit more serious than that, I assure you, Sophy. If you were unmarried your continued lack of knowledge about certain matters would be something of a safeguard. Any man who attempted to seduce you, would also know he would be expected to marry you. But as a married woman, you have no such protection. And if a certain sort of man happened to guess that you have not yet shared a bed with your husband, he would be relentless in his pursuit of you. He would see you as a very amusing conquest.”
“In other words, this hypothetical male would see me as a fine prize, indeed?”
“Precisely.” Julian put down the crystal swan and smiled approvingly at Sophy. “I’m glad you understand the situation.”
“Oh, I do,” she said, struggling to control her breathlessness. “You are telling me that you have finally decided to claim your husbandly rights.”
He shrugged with apparent sangfroid. “It seems to me it would be in your best interests if I did so. For your sake, I have concluded it would be best to put matters on a normal footing.”
Sophy’s fingers clenched around the back of the dressing table chair. “Julian, I have made it clear that I desire to be a complete wife to you but I must request one favor before we proceed tonight.”
His green eyes glittered, belying his outer calm. “What would that favor be, my dear?”
“It is that you cease explaining your logic for doing what you intend to do. Your assurance of how this is all for my own good is having the same effect on me as my special herb tea had on you at Eslington Park.”
Julian stared at her, speechless for a moment. Then he stunned Sophy by giving a shout of laughter.
“In danger of going to sleep, are you?” He moved with a suddenness that took Sophy by surprise, sweeping her up into his arms and striding toward the wide bed. “I certainly cannot have that. Madam, I swear I shall do my best to engage your complete and full attention in this matter.”
Sophy smiled tremulously up at him as she clung to his broad shoulders. A glorious thrill of excitement shot through her. “Believe me, my lord, you have my full attention now.”
“That’s just as it should be because you have certainly captured my complete concentration.”
He settled her tenderly onto the bed, tugging her dressing gown from her as he did so. His sensual smile was full of masculine expectation.
As he stripped off his own dressing gown, revealing his hard, lean body in the candlelight, Sophy no longer had any doubt but that he was doing this because he felt genuine desire. Julian was fully aroused, taut, and heavy with his need. She stared at him for a long moment, a last, embarrassed flicker of uncertainty moving through her even as she felt her own body begin to respond.
“Do I frighten you, Sophy?” Julian came down onto the bed beside her, gathering her into his arms. His large hands moved over her hip, feeling the shape of her through the fabric of her nightdress. “I do not want to alarm you.”
“Of course you do not frighten me. I have told you many times I am not some simple-minded chit fresh from the schoolroom.” She shivered slightly as his palm warmed her hip.
“Ah, yes, I keep forgetting that my country-bred bride is well versed in matters of breeding and reproduction.” He kissed her throat and smiled again when another tremor went through her. “I can see I have no reason to concern myself over the possibility of accidentally offending your delicate sensibilities.”
“I believe you are teasing me, Julian.”
“I believe you are right.” He eased her onto her back. His fingers found the ribbons of her nightdress and he began to undo them with slow deliberation. His eyes never left her face as he freed her breasts to his touch.
“So soft and womanly you are, little one.”
Sophy was mesmer
ized by Julian’s intent gaze as he looked at her. Fascinated, she watched as the sensual laughter in his eyes converted swiftly into a dark desire. She reached up to touch the side of his face and was surprised by his reaction to the gentle, questing caress.
He groaned thickly and his head lowered until his mouth captured hers. The kiss was hot, hungry, and demanding, revealing fully the depths of Julian’s arousal. He caught her lower lip between his teeth and bit carefully. When Sophy moaned softly, he slid his tongue intimately into her mouth and simultaneously brushed his thumb across one rosy nipple.
Sophy reacted sharply to Julian’s touch, covering his hand with her own as he stroked her breast. She felt her body stirring into throbbing awareness and knew she was rapidly losing control.
It was all right this time, she told herself as some small part of her called out a distant warning. Julian might not be in love with her but he was her husband. He had sworn to protect her and care for her and she trusted him to uphold his end of the marriage bargain. In return she would be a good wife, a proper wife.
It was not his fault that she was in love with him. It was not his fault that the risk she took tonight was far greater than the one he took.
“Sophy, Sophy, let yourself go. Give yourself over to me. You are so sweet. So soft.” Julian broke off the passionate kiss and tugged the nightdress free. He tossed it carelessly onto the floor beside the bed, his eyes sweeping over Sophy’s shadowed body. He put his hand on her bare calf and slowly stroked upward to her hip. When she trembled he leaned down to kiss her reassuringly.
The reassurance turned instantly back into demanding desire as Sophy laced her fingers in his hair and held him tightly to her. Her legs moved restlessly until he anchored one of them with one of his own. The action resulted in opening her more fully to his touch and he immediately began to explore the silken skin of her inner thigh.
Sophy’s head tossed from side to side on the pillow. She heard her own small, whispering gasp of excitement as she felt Julian’s fingers moving in small circles on her skin. His big hands felt so good on her body, strong and secure and knowing. She felt safe and cherished.
“Julian, Julian, I feel so strange.”
“I know, sweetheart. Your body makes no secret of it. I’m glad. I want you to feel this way.” He moved against her, letting her feel the shape of his manhood as it brushed her hip.
She flinched at the power she sensed in him but when he caught her fingers and guided them to his thrusting shaft, she did not resist. She touched him hesitantly at first, familiarizing herself with the size and shape of him.
“You see how much I want you, Sophy?” Julian’s voice was husky. “But I swear I will not take you until you want me just as badly.”
“How will you know when that time comes?” she asked, gazing up at him through half-closed lashes.
He smiled fleetingly and deliberately closed his palm over the soft mound between her legs. “You will tell me in your own way.”
She felt the growing warmth between her thighs and moved impatiently once more, seeking an even more intimate touch. “I think that time is here,” she whispered.
He slid one finger slowly into her softness. Sophy stiffened abruptly in reaction and then felt the moisture between her legs.
“Soon,” Julian promised with deep satisfaction. His lips trailed over her breasts. “Very soon.” He inserted his finger again and withdrew it only part way.
Hesitantly Sophy moved against his probing finger, her body instinctively tightening around it as if she would draw it deeper once more.
Julian obliged with a low exclamation of encouragement and desire. “You are so tight and warm,” he muttered as his mouth closed over hers again. “And you want me. You truly want me, don’t you sweetheart?” His tongue slid between her lips, imitating the provocative movements of his hand.
Sophy gasped and clutched at his shoulders, pulling him closer. When he used the pad of his thumb to tease a small, exquisitely sensitive area hidden in the dark nest of curls, she unwittingly scored his back with her nails.
“Julian.”
“Yes. Oh, God, yes.”
He moved on top of her, sliding one muscular thigh between her legs to make a space for himself. Sophy opened her eyes as she felt him lower himself down along the length of her. He was heavy, overwhelmingly so. She felt deliciously crushed into the bedding. When she looked up into his stark, intent face she experienced a racing thrill that was unlike anything she had ever known.
“Raise your knees, sweetheart,” he urged. “That’s it, darling. Open yourself to me. Tell me you want me.”
“I want you. Oh, Julian, I want you so much.” She felt open and vulnerable but curiously safe. This was Julian and he would never hurt her. He began to push against her softness, moistening himself on the liquid honey that flowed from her delicate sheath. Instinctively she started to lower her legs and tighten them.
“No, darling. It will be easier this way. You must trust me now. I swear I will enter you very slowly. I will go only as far and as fast as you want me to go. You can stop me at any time.”
She felt the rigid tension in his body and her palms slipped in the sweat on his back. He was lying, she thought happily. Either that or he was desperately trying to convince himself that he truly had sufficient willpower to stop on demand. Either way she sensed instinctively that he was as close to being out of control as she was.
The knowledge made her feel wonderfully wicked and womanly and strong. It was good to know she could bring her powerful, self-contained husband to such a pass. In this much, at least, they were equals.
“Do not worry, Julian. I would no more halt you now than I would try to hold back the sun,” she promised breathlessly.
“I am very glad to hear that. Look at me, Sophy. I want to see your eyes when I make you my wife in every sense of the word.”
She opened her eyes again and then sucked in her breath as she felt him begin to enter her. Her nails dug into him once more.
“It’s all right, little one.” Perspiration formed into small drops on his brow as he slowly eased forward. “It’s bound to be a bit rough at first but after that we will have clear sailing.”
“I do not see myself as a vessel at sea, Julian,” she managed even as she wondered at the incredibly tight, stretched, full feeling he was creating within her. Her nails dug deeper.
“I think we are both at sea,” he ground out as he fought to slow the penetration. “Hold onto me, Sophy.”
She knew the frail thread of his self-control had just snapped. Even as she gloried in the knowledge he groaned heavily and surged deeply into her.
“Julian.” Stunned by the swift, fiery invasion, Sophy cried out and pushed at his shoulders as if she could dislodge him.
“It’s all right, love. I swear it will be all right. Don’t fight me, Sophy. It will all be over soon. Try to relax.” Julian dropped tiny kisses on her cheek and throat while he held himself still within her tight channel. “Give it some time, my sweet.”
“Will time make you grow any smaller?” she demanded with some asperity.
He groaned and framed her dismayed face between his large palms. He looked down at her with gleaming eyes. “Time will help you adjust to me. You will learn to like this, Sophy. I know you will. You feel so wonderfully good and there is such passion in you. You must not be so impatient.”
“That is easy for you to say, my lord. You have what you wanted out of all this, I assume.”
“Almost all of what I wanted,” he agreed with a small smile. “But it will not be perfect for me until it is perfect for you. Are you feeling any better?”
She considered the question cautiously. “Yes,” she finally admitted.
“Good.” He kissed her lingeringly and then he began to move slowly within her, long, slow strokes designed to ease himself carefully back and forth in the tight passage.
Sophy bit her lip and waited anxiously to see if the movement made things worse
. But it did not. In truth, she did not feel so uncomfortable now, she realized. Some of the earlier excitement was returning, albeit slowly. Gradually her body adjusted to the fullness.
She was just getting to the point where she could honestly say she might be learning to enjoy the odd sensation when Julian suddenly began to move with increasing urgency.
“Julian, wait, I would have you move more slowly,” she said hastily as she sensed he was abandoning himself completely to the force that drove him.
“I am sorry, Sophy. I tried. But I cannot wait any longer,” he gritted his teeth and then he gave a muffled shout and flexed his hips, burying himself to the hilt.
And then Sophy felt the hot, heavy essence of him pouring into her as he went taut. Obeying an ancient instinct, she wrapped her arms and legs around him and held him close. He is mine, she thought with deep wonder. In this moment and for all time, he is mine.
“Hold me,” Julian’s voice was ragged. “Hold me, Sophy.” Slowly the rigidity went out of him and he collapsed, heavy and damp with sweat, along the length of her.
Sophy lay still for a long time, absently smoothing Julian’s sweat-streaked back with her fingertips as she gazed up at the canopy over the bed. She could not say she thought much of the final act, itself, but she had definitely enjoyed the caressing that preceded it. She also found the warm intimacy of the embrace afterward very appealing.
She sensed that Julian would never lower his guard to this extent in any other situation with her. That alone was worth putting up with the business of lovemaking.
Julian stirred reluctantly and lifted himself up on his elbows. He smiled with lazy satisfaction and chuckled when she smiled back at him. He bent his head to drop a small kiss on the tip of her nose.
“I feel like a stallion at the end of a long race. I may have won, but I am exhausted and weak. You must give me a few minutes to recover. Next time it will be better for you, sweetheart.” He smoothed her hair off her forehead with a tender movement.