Anxiety, Leave Me Alone

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Anxiety, Leave Me Alone Page 3

by Alex Canny


  Maintain a sense of childlike playfulness as you practice laughter yoga. Laugh on a daily basis, ideally, in the morning, teach your body and mind to laugh on command. You may find it little difficult and feel discouraged in the beginning, keep up your practice, and soon you will start to enjoy it.

  Mindful Jogging

  Anxiety often makes us feel immobilized. If we get physically active, we can immediately get some relief. Researchers found that physical exercise can treat mild to moderate anxiety and depression as efficiently as antidepressant medications- but without harming the body.

  To get the emotional benefits of physical exercise, you don’t have to do strenuous workouts. Instead, do some jogging every day for thirty minutes— you will be amazed by the result.

  When anxiety strikes, our system floods with adrenaline, cortisol and other stress hormones. When these hormones are released, our sympathetic nervous system becomes unstable; we feel distressed and experience physical discomforts. The best way to get rid of adrenaline is to burn it off with cardiovascular exercises, like running/jogging or aerobics.

  Burning adrenaline and other stress hormones are not the only way to improve the anxiety condition. When we jog, our system releases neurochemicals like endorphins. Endorphins work like analgesics, which interact with the receptors of the brain and shrink the perception of emotional pain. Endorphins also contain sedative properties; they work like morphine and triggers a positive feeling in the body and mind. But unlike morphine, body’s endorphins don’t lead to addiction. Our body also releases other happy hormones like oxytocin, serotonin and reward hormone dopamine when we jog.

  To get the most out of your jogging program, learn to do it mindfully. Mindful jogging is about enjoying the exercise with your senses. For mindful jogging, choose a place with the least visual distraction. Avoid crowded places or heavy traffic. Be aware of the environment, the temperature, and the sound. As you jog, feel the movements of your leg-joints and tension in the calf muscles; feel as your calf muscles and hamstrings stretch and contract with every movement. Feel the rhythm from heel to toe. Stay present; be aware as you breathe in and out. We will discuss more about mindfulness later in this book.

  If you do jogging every day, it will help change the way you feel and put you in a better mood.

  Chapter 3

  Transforming Intrusive Thoughts

  When we feel overwhelmed with anxiety, our mind races with negative thoughts.

  We try our best to fight or run away from those negative intrusive thoughts. But that only makes them stronger. There is a better strategy for dealing with those intrusive thoughts. Which is turning them into rational and realistic statements. Here are some examples.

  My feeling is making me restless and uncomfortable, but I can handle it.

  I know fighting only makes my anxiety more powerful— I choose not to fight. Anxiety shrinks when I quit fighting.

  Although I’m feeling a little uncomfortable, I can still focus on the task in hand. By staying present and focused on my task, my anxiety decreases.

  Although I’m feeling tense, I can still relax.

  My anxiety wants me to rush, but I know, this is not an emergency. I can take all the time I need to let go and relax.

  I can use this feeling as an opportunity for me to learn to cope with my fears. The more I learn, the more powerful I become.

  The symptoms I’m experiencing right now is uncomfortable, but it is not dangerous. It can’t hurt me.

  I’ve survived every time I went through this feeling, and I will survive this time too.

  I have developed this habit of being upset. I’ll break this habit pattern eventually. I feel a little bit of peace despite my anxiety. This peace will grow and my anxiety will disappear. I only have to stick to my practice and wait patiently.

  My attention makes anxiety stronger. If I don’t pay attention to anxiety, it will shrink. Anxiety wants my attention because it will not survive without it.

  The Mindful Way

  Learning the mindful way will help you to make peace with anxious feelings. This will improve the quality of your life. Mindfulness will generate a sense of acceptance. When you truly become mindful of your thoughts, feelings, and sensations, you’ll embrace them without judgment and criticism. This will diminish the power of your anxiety. To learn the mindful way, you have to practice mindfulness meditation.

  So prepare yourself for the practice. You’ll need a quiet place. If the environment is not perfectly quiet, that’s fine. We can use noise and distraction as a part of our meditation. You can turn on some gentle music if you like.

  Sit comfortably with your back straight (not stiff) and chin up. If you’re sitting on the chair, keep your legs uncrossed with your feet touching the floor.

  It is good to meditate in the same place at the same time every day.

  It is important to touch joy and happiness while practicing mindfulness. So meditate with a little smile on your face.

  When you are ready, close your eyes and take a few moments to gather your attention by simply being fully present with your breath as it enters and leaves your body.

  Rest your attention on your nostrils where you feel the inflow and the outflow. Notice as you breath-in through your nostrils, you feel cool. As you breathe out, you feel warm. Become aware of the feeling of coolness and warmth as the air moves in and out.

  Normal breathing is effortless. Pay your attention to this spontaneous movement of your breathing cycle. Escort your awareness to the place in your body where you clearly experience the process of breathing.

  Now shift our attention on your belly. Notice your belly expands with inhalation and contracts with exhalation. Also, pay attention to the way each breath changes.

  Sometimes thoughts will drift your mind away from your breath. Every time you feel lost in thoughts, remind yourself to re-connect with the natural rhythm— and gently drift back.

  Maintain the effortless breathing and remain present throughout the whole sequence of inhaling, exhaling and pausing between breaths.

  The process of paying attention should be effortless. It should not affect the natural rhythm of your breathing. Pay effortless attention and relax into each breath. Sustain your attention throughout the entire breath-cycle— one breath at a time.

  Notice the sensation when each breath arises until the next breath begins. In this meditation practice, your breath is the anchor for your attention. Therefore every time your mind moves away, escort it back to your breath.

  The rhythm of your breathing will change automatically. Sometimes your breath will be long, sometimes short, and sometimes shallow. Be aware of the change and allow it to be the way it is.

  After a couple of minutes, shift your awareness from breath to sounds as they spontaneously call your attention to them and away from your breath.

  Become aware of the sounds inside or outside the room. It could be the sound of clock or birds twittering or distant traffic— whatever it is focus on the sound without bothering about the source.

  Pay attention to space between sounds. The space is silence. Be aware of the silence.

  Expand your awareness to become present with the subtle sounds as they arise from all directions. Let them arise spontaneously in your consciousness. You don’t have to think about the source or cause of the sound, let the sounds be known spontaneously.

  If you find yourself thinking about the sounds, gently shift your attention to their sensory characteristics such as loudness, pitch, and frequency.

  Notice your reaction as a sound enters into your consciousness. Notice if the mind terms the sound as pleasant or unpleasant. You don’t need to change or resist anything. You only have to observe.

  Whenever a thought shifts your attention from the sound to something else, calmly move your attention back to the sounds as they rise and fall from one moment to the next.

  After a few minutes, when the sound no longer holds your attention, direct your focus on your bodily se
nsations. Every time boredom creeps in, return to the anchor— your breath.

  Notice the sensations you’re experiencing right now in your entire body. Move your focus to the quality of the sensation.

  Is it a feeling of tension or numbness? Whatever it is, be present with that sensation.

  Observe if any change occurs the moment you focus your attention on a sensation of your body. Is there any clinging or avoiding tendency? See how accurately you can recognize each sensation as it enters into your awareness.

  Don’t judge your sensations. Just observe as the rise, peak, and fall.

  Notice if your attention amplifies the sensation or weaken it or make it shrink.

  There is no need to change the way you feel. Our goal is not to change anything. Becoming fully aware is the goal. Sensations are transient. They will fade.

  The sensations of anxiety are also temporary— it will also disappear in time.

  Now include the awareness of emotion in your practice. Emotions will inevitably arise in your consciousness.

  The moment an emotion surfaces into your awareness, recognize the emotion and accept it nonjudgmentally.

  Stay in a receptive mood as you become aware of your emotional state. Remain open and permit yourself to be completely present with the emotion. Direct all your attention to fully experience emotion.

  Human mind terms an emotion as pleasant or unpleasant or neutral. It clings to pleasant emotions and pushes away the negative ones. Whenever the emotion appears in your awareness, simply let it remain in your awareness without pursuing it.

  Some emotions can be a bit tricky to navigate.

  If a strong emotion appears in your mind, open to a mindful inquiry, reflecting on the nature of the emotion itself, without becoming involved in the story.

  Label your emotions. For instance, if you feel irritated, you can label it “anger”, if feel sad, label as “grief” or “Sadness”. Allow yourself to fully experience the emotion. Contain the emotion.

  Being mindful of the emotion is the most important part of your mindfulness practice; because it will change your relationship with negative emotions.

  If you can become mindful of anxious feelings, you no longer have to resist it. You’ll only accept it with a non-reactive awareness.

  In the final stage, we’re going to practice Choiceless awareness. Become aware of everything that arises in the background of our consciousness. Whether it is sound, thoughts, images, sensation or emotion, you’ll allow it to remain there, focusing primarily on the flow of your breathing. If a sound predominates the background of your awareness, make it a focus of your attention. If a thought, image or sensation predominates the background, make it your object to focus and expand your field of awareness to include the entire range of experience— breath, sounds, thoughts, images, sensations, and emotions.

  Now it is time to end your practice. Don’t come out too quickly. Take your time. Become aware that you’re going to end your meditation. Slowly open your eyes.

  Gently move your upper body. Stretch your hands and legs. Then stand up.

  Chapter 4

  The Action Phase

  In the last three chapters, we mostly worked on cognitive aspects of anxiety. In order to make the lasting change, we also have to work on the behavioral aspect. We will discuss two exposure techniques in this chapter — flooding and implosion. These are behavioral fear exposure strategies, which involve facing your own fears. I know, if you have persistent anxiety, even the thought of staring your worst fears in the face can make you terrified. But rest assured, it is not as fearful as it sounds. Although this technique will put you in direct contact with your object of fear, it is perfectly safe. I’m not going to ask you to endanger yourself to overcome the fear of height or wild animals.

  These techniques involve a systematic, gradual set of steps that you can handle one at a time.

  Once you learn a step, you will move to the next step.

  A new step will bring some degree of anxiety, but not more than you can manage.

  It is important not to procrastinate with the instructions of flooding and implosion.

  If you find yourself procrastinating with action steps, go back to previous chapters to prepare yourself mentally.

  If you still find these techniques extremely anxiety producing, seek professional help. It is advised not to try these methods when your anxiety is high. Facing fears with high anxiety often does harm than good. Also, don’t try these methods if you are dealing with other disorders such as alcoholism and substance abuse. Therapists often recommend exposure in combination with medication for severely anxious individuals.

  Before trying each action step relax your body and mind by doing breathing exercises. You can try abdominal breathing or alternate nostril breathing or both. You can even do mindful meditation for 10 minutes. If muscular relaxation technique puts you into a more relaxed state, you can try it too.

  Before attempting facing your fears, break up the process into small manageable steps. The way you break up your fears will give you an idea of the nature of your fear perception. Here is how to do it.

  Start with listing the objects of your anxiety.

  For instance, you might be afraid of one of the following:

  Meeting new people

  Heights

  Traveling to new places

  Financial loss

  Pick one object from your list and think about every conceivable aspect of your fear.

  Now, in your mind's eye, envision a situation that includes an object of your fear. Imagine all the activities that surround that object and find out when the fear starts.

  As, for example, you are afraid of social events and you are starting to feel anxious as you are traveling to that location. Or perhaps the fear starts the moment you step into a room filled with people. Take note of whenever the fear begins.

  Next step is anticipating all possible outcomes. Include all the small details, such as people’s reaction, or what they might think about you.

  Now ask yourself the following questions:

  Exactly when did I start feeling anxious?

  Which part of the event could produce the highest level of anxiety?

  Which are the activities I tend to avoid?

  If I have to face my fear head on, what are the things I will do?

  If I have to go through the most fearful part of the event, do I have any crutches? If so, what are they?

  What is the worst outcome I could anticipate if I were to confront my fear?

  Take time to think and write your honest answers. You don’t have to feel embarrassed to explain the darkest aspects of your fear, which you think may sound stupid to others.

  Exploring your worst fear can make feel a little anxious. Take a deep breath in and out for a few times, then move on. The next step is designing your fear ladder.

  Designing Your Fear ladder

  Now you have some understanding of the nature of your fear. In this stage, you’ll take your fear apart by building a fear ladder. Here are the steps to follow:

  Write down all the activities you’ll sequentially follow to ultimately face your fear.

  Rate each activity on a scale of 0 to 100.

  Arrange the items in a ladder beginning with the lowest rated item at the bottom and highest rated item on the top stair. This ladder is your ‘exposure hierarchy’, another term used for the fear ladder. Creating the fear ladder may cause anxiety in some people. If it happens, take a few deep breaths and continue. Don’t worry; you won’t face all the items at once. We will take one step at a time.

  See the following example. It’s a fear ladder for facing the fear of social situations.

  Giving a speech or being a center of attention

  93

  Getting introduced to someone

  88

  Talking to an attractive men/women

  84

  Commuting to the event

  78

  Doing handshakes with
people I don’t know

  70

  Unexpectedly seeing someone I know

  50

  Talking to people I know

  45

  Preparing myself for the event

  35

  The above ladder contains 8 steps. You can break the task into 16 or more steps if you like. For example, you can add an in-between step or two such as parking at the garage or being greeted by the host.

  Make your own fear ladder. Before finally facing your fear we are going to do a visualization exercise.

  Imagining Your Fear

  The best preparation for exposing yourself in your anxiety-triggering situation is visualization practice. Because when you visualize your fear, you will experience less anxiety than facing it for real. You may think that imagining your fear won’t make you anxious at all. But most people who were asked to vividly imagine a stressful event reported anxiety symptoms when they visualized rich details of the event. The most important benefit of visualization is that through imagining people gradually master their fear in the mind and feel less anxious before they face the object of fear in reality.

  Here are the basic steps of visualization exercise:

  First, do some breathing exercises.

  Start with the lowest step of your fear ladder

  Visualize as if you are really facing your fear.

  Feel if it is real. Bring color, smell, sound, texture, and touch. Vividly imagine all the sensory features. Don’t visualize like you are watching a video. Imagine as the first person. Don’t try hard to be perfect. It may take some practice to construct a clear picture.

  When you have the picture in your mind of the event of fear, rate the level of anxiety on a scale of 0 to 100.

 

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