Chance was completely silent as he looked at me. I was still bent over on my knees with my face close to the carpet, coke dust and dirt from floor stuck to my nose and upper lip. I was stunned like a deer caught in the headlights, and the look on my baby’s face expressed the true nature of his confusion.
“Rayqelle? What’s going on? What are you doing on the floor?” Chance said as he stood perfectly still trying to make sense of everything. I scrambled to my feet. “Hey baby. Why didn’t you call and let me know you were comin’? Gimme a hug.” I put my arms around him and held him tightly but he just stood there. Then, I reached up toward him, and ran my finger softly along his right eyebrow to smooth it out. And I touched his face. He jumped back slightly and looked at me before pulling away almost in horror. Chance stepped back and went into his jacket pocket; pulling out a napkin, reaching toward my face. I had started to bleed from one nostril. I snatched the napkin and turned away quickly to dab the blood from my nose. My hands were trembling and I was getting sick to stomach. I was standing in front of the man that I loved. The man I hadn’t seen or really even talked to in weeks, and the only thing I could think about was the dope I had spilled in the carpet. My skin was starting to crawl. I needed a hit bad! I was a broken mess! Letah politely excused herself and ran back down the stairs to check on Lynn. She didn’t wanna be anywhere insight when my shit hit the fan! Chance sat down in the chair by the cedar chest. “Why haven’t you been returning my calls? What’s goin’ on with you?” he asked.
“I’ve just been goin’ through a lot since my stepfather died. So many things have been goin’ on inside my head but I’m o.k. I’ll be fine,” I said, still agonizing over the last bag of coke I had so clumsily spilled a few minutes before. I was trippin’! I wanted to get back down on my knees and lick that spot on the rug that held the last bit of dust.
“Why are you sweating like that? Are you sick? And what were you doin’ on the floor like that? Why does your nose keep bleeding,” Chance asked as he reached for me again. I snatched away. I didn’t want him too close to me. I felt dirty and ashamed. I felt like he could see right through me.
“Sit down and talk to me. I have not seen you in over a month! Why do you keep squirming and dancing around? Seriously… Are you alright?” he asked again, getting more impatient.
“I’m fine!” I snapped. “I ... I … I just need some water. Will you go downstairs and get me some? Get it from the faucet, and let it run for a few minutes so it gets nice and cold” I said trying to think of anything to get him out of the room for a minute.
“The faucet?” he asked. “You don’t even drink faucet water” he added, looking even more confused.
“Please! Chance, just go … and get… the water!” I said, almost begging. Chance looked at me with greater confusion, turning slowly and walking out of the door. I shut it behind him and quickly dashed over to the phone by the bed to call Iesha. She had to know somebody who could get their hands on some more coke. I dialed her number and the phone rang.
“Whaz-up, girl? You ready for this party? She asked. “Better brace yo’ self. I hear he’s got a dick the size of a California cucumber” she added.
“Iesha. Listen. I’m gon’ need some more coke. I spilled the last baggie on the floor when Chance rang the doorbell, and…” I tried to explain as she cut me off.
“Chance? What the fuck is he doin’ here? You better tell that nigga you got plans tonight!” Iesha said.
“Plans? I can’t just tell him that I have plans. He came all the way from Chicago and he’s my fiancé.” I said as my stomach churned and my body ached.
“Not for long. Not if you fuck this up! These niggas are paying me good money for that ass! Chance can have what’s left of it after they get finished!” Iesha barked into the phone like the bitch she was.
“What about the coke? I need some bad! Right now! Please? I’m gettin’ sick!” I begged Iesha.
“Bitch! Coke? What coke? You mean that white powdered courage you been snortin’ up like you was crazy? You stupid ho. That was china white, not coke! That was heroin!” Iesha said as she laughed uncontrollably.
“Heroin? Why the fuck would you gimme some shit like that? You scandalous bitch! You got me hooked on heroin? You said that was cocaine! You said it was just coke!” I screamed into the phone in pure terror!
“No, bitch! You said it was coke! You got yo’ self hooked, not me. You are the one that was suckin’ up that shit like a vacuum cleaner! I even told yo’ ass to slow down. But I know one thing, you better be ready by eleven o’clock or I’m gonna fuck you up fa’ real, and after I get finished I’m gonna sit yo’ rich nigga down and tell him a little story. A story all about yo’ nasty ass. So get it together! Brent Williams is gonna be waitin’!” Iesha shouted into the phone. “That’s why I don’t fuck wit’ dope fiends” Iesha said to someone in the back ground as she slammed the phone in my ear.
I started to cry. The shakes were getting worse, much worse! I was sweatin’ like a run away slave and my stomach was crampin’ like a mutha’fucka’. I was so sick that I never even realized that Chance had come back up the stairs and was standing in the doorway behind me with tears in his eyes. I stood up slowly and walked toward him. He stood motionless but he exuded more emotion than I was able to stand. He had heard the entire conversation. There was really no need to try and make up anymore lies. It had been a crazy ass six weeks, and what was really crazy is that I did all this shit to hold on to the one thing that had come to mean the world to me. Only to still end up about to lose it anyway. My world was crumbling right before very eyes!
“Who was that on the phone?” he asked.
“It was Iesha, she was …” I tried to answer.
“She was what? Stuffin’ yo’ nose wit’ dope? What the fuck is wrong with you? You look terrible! Iesha did this to you? Why? Just tell me why? Wasn’t she supposed to be yo’ girl?” He asked, as he stared at me with a sobering mix of utter confusion and complete disappointment, struggling to understand.
“So is this what you been doin’ wit’ cho’ self the last six weeks? Hangin out wit’ cho’ yo girl gettin’ high? Is this why you can never take my calls? Is this why you have been avoiding me like the plague? I had started to think you met somebody new, but I guess it wasn’t a somebody, just something.” His strong voice shuttered with intense hurt, and the sad part is that he didn’t even know the half of it. Not only was I now a junky, but I was also a liar and a whore. He just didn’t know it yet. If he thought he felt like crying now, wait until he hears everything! In about two hours I was gonna have to leave here. That’s when shit is really going to go down; but before I could deal with anything I was gonna have to get a fix and quickly! Apparently I was goin’ through some sort of withdrawal from some shit I didn’t even know I was using. Since I had never used cocaine or heroin before, I had no idea what either one of them was supposed to feel like. All I knew was that it felt good and made the shit Iesha had me doing go down a whole lot easier. Tonight was the first time I had to be without it since I started using and I was not doing well at all.
Chance sat down on the bed and shook his head in disbelief; covering his face with both hands. He laid his head back on the oversized pillows. Devastated by what he had just learned and exhausted from jet lag, Chance closed his eyes, took a deep breath as he relaxed his head on the pillow. I watched him breathe as he laid perfectly still. His strong chest rose and fell as he began to drift off to sleep and before I knew it he was snoring. I sat on the floor next the bed, wanting to touch him, but I knew that this was my chance to slip out and do what I had to do. So I made sure not to wake him, then I grabbed my purse and some clothes. I knew that if I timed this right I could be out and back before Chance even realized that I was gone. I quietly crawled out of the door, gently closing it behind me. Then I carefully tip-toed down the stairs and ran over to wake Letah; who was sleeping on the couch. I touched her softly on the shoulder so that I didn’t startle her. I quickly
explained to her that Iesha had been giving me heroin instead of cocaine and that was why I was getting sick and had to go find some more right away or I was gonna die; at least that’s what it felt like anyway. Letah begged to go with me, but I told her that I needed her to stay here in case Chance woke up before I could get back. If he got up and found me gone, I needed Letah to be here to try and keep him calm. Fortunately Chance was a hard sleeper, and when he was out he was usually out for the count! Letah agreed to stay behind, but I told her to call me right away if Chance woke up. If she had to tell him anything, just to tell him that I just went for a drive and that I would be right back.
So I jumped in the car and put it in neutral, letting it roll out of the driveway slowly, down to the end of the street. I didn’t want to draw any more attention to the fact that I was leaving. I started the engine as soon as got the second corner and quickly sped away. Lynn lived in the Kensington District of San Diego. This is one of the nicer areas of the city, so I knew there was no place around there to buy any dope. I mean it wasn’t like the hood, where there was a friendly neighborhood street pharmacist standing on every corner ready to serve. I had to get to City Heights. One of the roughest ghettos in southern California and it was no place to take lightly, especially at night! I did sixty the whole way there. I mean, I made it all the way from Kensington to 43rd and Fairmont in twelve minutes without getting pulled over by the cops. That had to be one for the Guinness Book of world records. When I pulled up there were three Latin Gangstas posted up against the side of a run down building. One of them saw that I was sitting there at the stop sign trying to get there attention. They figured that I either had to be a cop, or some bougie bitch from El Cerrito or somewhere trying to score some dope. Then one of them said something to the other two in Spanish and they all laughed.
“Whaz-up ma? What ‘chu need baby?” The little dark haired thug said as he walked over and leaned into the driver’s side window of the car. He looked around and then checked the back seat to make sure I wasn’t five-0.
“Got some china white?” I asked nervously. I couldn’t believe what I was doing!
“China White? Goddamn ma! You fuckin’ wit dat real shit! You gotta be outta yo…!” He said as I abruptly cut him off.
“Mutha’fucka! Do you got it or not?” I shouted at the dark haired gangsta! By then I was really starting to feel the effects of the withdrawals and my patience was running short. For a minute I musta’ forgot what type of person I was dealing with, because before I could finish my sentence the Latin gangsta had pulled a gun from up under his white-T, and wedged it between my chin and throat. I was already sweating like I had just run the miracle mile, but now my sweat ran cold as my life flashed before my eyes.
“Better pump yo’ brakes bitch! I should rob yo’ pretty ass, but no… You know what I’m gonna do instead? I’m gon’ hook you up wit’ this real shit! Yeah… cuz once you get a hit of this, you gon’ be in love…. Every time you get a dollah’, you gon’ be runnin’ back to El Cajun to holla’ at me... So. See bitch? I ain’t even gotta’ rob you… I’m already in yo’ pockets, and as soon as yo’ money runs out, I’m gon’ be all up in that lil’ tight pussy a’ yours… makin’ you moan.” He said, grinning, and looking back at his homeboys as I started to cry.
So I made the buy. Then, I sped the fuck outta’ El Cajun. I was aching all over. My nose was running and I had the worst case of chills.
I was dope sick and could barely see straight enough to drive! I’d only made it as far as 47th and Meade before I had to pull over and take my medicine. I looked around making sure nobody was walking by and that no cops were rolling through. Once I made sure the coast was clear I took the key out of the ignition and stuck it down into the plastic. I scooped out some powder, and put it up to my nose and snorted once, twice, and then again. I felt the dust hit my sinus and start to tingle, I sneezed and then… almost immediately I felt the calm, the rush, as the aches started to subside. My pain felt further and further away.
The Latin gangsta was right. He hooked me up with that real shit. I leaned forward in the seat focusing on the Acura symbol in the center of the steering wheel. I started to nod off. I could feel it all over. I was free!
Then my cell phone rang, almost scaring me to death! One ring, two rings, three rings… I heard it clearly, but I couldn’t move. I was fucked up! The phone rang again, and again, and again! I shook myself and grabbed for the phone that was lying in the passengers’ seat.
“H... he... hell…Hello?” I struggled to speak.
“Bitch where you at?” It was Iesha.
“I … I ... had to go get some ...” I was too fucked up for words. I just wanted to enjoy my high while it lasted.
“Bitch! I told you I had something for you to do tonight! It’s eleven-thirty. Do you want me to fuck you up cuz I will. Look. These niggas are waitin’ on you. Get ‘cho ass downtown now! You got thirty minutes!” Iesha shouted into the phone before she hung up. By then she had blown my high wit’ all that yellin’ and shit. But I was starting to feel well again.
So I decided to go ahead to the hotel. I figured I would run in, smile, walk around and look pretty. Maybe even give one or two mutha’fuckas some head, or maybe fuck‘em real quick if I had to. Then I could be back at the house with Chance before he even missed me.
CHAPTER 22
When I got to the hotel I made my way up to the penthouse and rang the bell. The door opened and there stood Iesha, wearing a short pink nighty and matching high heels. There were three other girls in sexy lingerie, sandwiched between three tall, fine ass, muscle bound niggas (all rookie NBA players) sitting on an oversized white sofa in the living room. Each guy had his own bottle of Cristal waving it around as they argued and debated back and forth over music that was too loud. They were screaming about who had gotten the biggest signing bonus while trying to out floss each other in front of their paid companions.
The hoes rolled their eyes at me as I went on in the back to get ready. I hurried up and got undressed. Then quickly got in the shower to wash the funk from my body where I had sweated in agony, fiendin’ for the bitter china white. The hot water beat down on my neck and back, momentarily soothing my body but nothing could sooth the soreness of my soul.
I got out and got dressed; slipping into a little sexy number that I had bought a long time ago for Chance but never got to wear it. I stopped, and looked in to the full length mirror that was very carefully positioned to capture a view of the king sized bed. I checked my hair and make up, adjusting my cleavage, preparing to make my entrance as Iesha stormed in.
“Hurry up bitch! I need yo’ ass out there not in here,” she said loudly. Iesha stood there with both hands placed upon her curvaceous hips as if she was Wonder Woman, Batgirl, or some shit like that. I laughed at that tramp. Not because it was funny, but because I knew it would piss her the fuck off.
I then took one last look in the mirror, hating what I saw, but vowing that this would be the last night for anymore of this kind of shit.
CHAPTER 23
I opened the door and walked out into the living room. Each one of the girls turned and looked at me as if I was public enemy number one. Shela recognized me instantly and smiled. Each of them guarded the nigga they sat with as if I had come to steal him away. Those hoes didn’t know that I couldn’t have been less interested in either one of them dumb ass basketball dunkin niggas.
I was just trying to get through this night the best way I could; hopefully without having to be kissed, fucked or fondled in the process. Ironically, neither of those niggas paid me one bit of attention. So, I spent the next few hours listening to four self indulged, over sized black men telling a bunch of over exaggerated basketball stories and over the top tales. Yelling about what they bought, what they had done, or what they were about to do. This was all I could do to keep my fuckin’ eyes open; if you want to know the truth!
Towards the end, two of the niggas ended up passed out on the couch drunk.
One of them went off to a private suite with two of the girls, and the other guy disappeared into a back room with Iesha. I was just sorta’ sitting there by myself watching MTV Cribs. I’d had enough. So quietly I grabbed my shit and proceeded to bounce the fuck up outta there.
I walked exhaustedly down the long hallway. As I approached the elevator, I began to feel a new found freedom, and I was grasping for it at all cost. As I stood impatiently waiting for the elevator to reach my floor, I heard a clicking sound coming from the door situated to the right of me. It was the sound of the latches opening and the doorknob turning.
I could also hear someone exchanging words inside, it sounded like two men arguing in a hushed tone. Whatever the hell was going on I didn’t wanna know about it. I put my head down to keep from having to make any eye contact with whoever was about to open that door.
Rayqelle's Revenge ---Book 1--- Special Holiday Edition (Ratchet) Page 10