Time For Love Box Set

by Karen Deen

  “It’s okay, just sit and take your time. No one noticed, they were too busy hugging me, and Xavier was too busy patting himself on the back for pulling this off. By the way, you are in so much trouble, my friend. How could you not tell me? We don’t keep secrets, bitch.”

  I let out a little laugh. I knew she would kill me. She deserves to be spoiled. I need to pull myself together. This is her night. Her birthday. I can’t ruin it. It may be the last one I get to spend with her for a long time.

  “Sorry, Nat. I’ll be fine. It was just a shock. I never expected to see him. He looks like he’s hurting. I saw it in his eyes.”

  “I don’t know about that but what I do know is, you were right. He is the hottest man I’ve seen in a very long time. That suit… holy shit. No wonder you couldn’t say no. I would have let him take me that first night against the glass. You did well to resist as long as you did.” She leans in and hugs me while whispering in my ear, “It will be over soon, and you can decide if he’s your one. Keep your focus, follow the dream.”

  That’s my problem. I know he’s my one. I just don’t know which dream I want more.

  If only I can have both.

  At the moment, Grant is swallowing up my dancing dream and I am getting ready to let him. I don’t know if I can stay away much longer.

  “Thanks, Nat. I don’t know what I would do without you. Now enough about me, let’s get a drink and celebrate you getting old.”

  I receive a deserving slap on the arm as we walk to the bar, arms linked, and I try my hardest to smile.

  “Natalie, what took you so long? I nearly gave some little girl over there a heart attack and I thought her father was going to kill me. We all screamed surprise when they opened the door and she jumped straight into his arms. His eyes were ready to kill me.”

  “Not her father, that’s Sophia’s uncle. That’s Grant. You’re probably lucky he didn’t kill you because he is very protective of that little girl. God help his own children if he ever has them.”

  “Oh, shit! You are joking me. Is that the Grant. Mr. hottie who wanted to bang you in the studio?”

  “Xavier!” Nat and I scream at him.

  “What? I’m just checking I have the same guy. By that reaction, I got my answer.”

  “Can you just leave it alone, Xav. It’s just really hard at the moment, I need to keep my focus.”

  “I get it, I get it. Mouth closed. You owe me lunch though, when all this is over. I want the full story. Not just the abbreviated crap I’ve been getting. You’re like my sister. He’s hurting you, big time. I just want to help.” He looks down at me and wraps me in a hug.

  “That I can do. Just one thing, though. Grant is not the one hurting me, I am doing that to myself. Now, let’s drink and be merry. There’s a birthday we need to celebrate.”

  I try not to, but I glance across the room trying to catch a glimpse of him. My eyes scan the Stevenson table. Everyone’s there except Grant. Hearing the door open, my head turns to once again see Grant walking away.

  He isn’t walking away from me. He’s walking away for me. My heart breaks all over again. Thank you, my gorgeous man. No one ever sees the real you. The real you is so much more than you let the world see. Time to breathe and concentrate on the birthday girl.

  I can’t drink a lot but allow myself one glass of champagne for the birthday toast. Truth be known, I would love to slam down a few shots to take the pain away. For the first time in a long time, I just want to be drunk enough that I can’t feel anything. Then I could sleep. I’d even put up with the hangover that would follow.

  All night, I keep looking across at Grant’s family. They look so happy. Always laughing and everyone talking at once. I can see why Sophia has become more confident. This family have taken those kids in and loved them more in the last year than they have ever known in their life. Sometimes, all it takes is the right love to make a person blossom.

  It’s time for the birthday cake. Xavier signals me over before he gets it brought out.

  “Hey, when I scared your little friend, Sophia, I promised her and her brother they could help sing and have some cake to say sorry.”

  I burst out laughing.

  “You’re a big softie. I bet Sammy wouldn’t knock cake. You want me to go get them, don’t you?”

  “Could you, please? I don’t want any other big tough uncles wanting to beat me up.”

  “It is not only the uncles you need to worry about, the aunties will slay you and the grandparents are killers. You better be careful.”

  “Shut up and just do it, please.”

  “I’m not joking, you just wait.” I giggle as I walk off to get the kids. It’s been a while since we arrived and with a champagne under my belt, I’ve settled a little.

  “Hi, everyone. Nice to see you all. Just wondering if there are any people at this table who’d like to sing Happy Birthday and eat birthday cake? There probably isn’t but I just thought I would check.”

  “Me, me, me!” the kids shout, jumping up and down, but they aren’t the only ones. This family is full of big kids.

  Laughing, I gesture the way. “Well, you are all welcome. The more the merrier. There’s plenty of cake and it will just give Natalie more reason to hate me. But hey, what are friends for, right?” Everyone’s laughing at me as they get out of their seats and make their way over to our area.

  “Wow, you know how to pull a crowd, don’t you, Zara?” Xavier comments as he walks past with the biggest unicorn-shaped cake. Every girl has a childhood thing they never let go of. Nat’s is unicorns. She loves them.

  “We’re not just any crowd, we are her family,” Zach answers quietly as he places his arm around my shoulder. “You’re Grant’s girl, so you’re one of us.” I gasp looking up at him. “It’s okay, Zara, we understand. We’re here, ready when you are. We can wait, too.” I can’t help it. My head drops to his shoulder and he squeezes me harder.

  “Look after him for me, Zach,” I whisper.

  “He’s strong, don’t worry. We’ll take care of him, if he’ll let us.” He squeezes me one last time and walks over to Emily who’s rocking Thomas to sleep. He’s wrapped in a snug blanket. Zach walks up behind and wrap his big warm arms around her and Thomas. The vision is pure love.

  Natalie’s looking at me like she’s ready to poke my eyes out with red-hot pokers. It makes me laugh and give her a little wave. I feel a little tug on my skirt and I look down to find Sophia staring at me with those beautiful big eyes.

  “Do you want a cuddle, Princess?”

  “Yes, please. Uncle Grant went home sick, so he isn’t here to cuddle me.”

  “There are lots of people, aren’t there?” I comment as I pick her up and tuck her on my hip. She nods and rests her head on my shoulder just like I’ve seen her do to Grant many times over. Tonight, I’m her safe place, and she’s mine.

  “Xavier told me he scared you. He’s one of my best friends and he feels really bad.”

  “That’s okay. Uncle Grant looked after me. When Daddy isn’t there, he always looks after me if I am scared or sad. You know he could make you feel better when you’re sad, Miss Zara.”

  “Sophia, I’m sure he would be really good at making me feel better. Maybe one day I will be able to let him.”

  The singing starts, and Sophia joins in with the sweetest little angel voice. Sometimes, I wish I could go back to that little girl who loved her bunny and didn’t have a care in the world. This adulting really does suck sometimes.

  With the cake now cut and Sophia and Samuel helping to hand it out, I introduce my friends to the Stevenson family. I start with Luke and the women by his side. Zoe introduces herself and the pieces fall into place. Grant mentioned her before. Luke and Xavier hit it off straight away as I knew they would. They are both big kids.

  We’re then joined by Alesha, Lilly, and the rest of the family. I introduce everyone and watch the weirdest thing happen with Xavier. He’s quiet and calm, not his usual loud, silly na
ture. Everyone starts chatting at once. It then that I notice Alesha step back slightly from the crowd, her cheeks slightly flushed. Oh. My. God. Is this for real? Xavier stares at her, transfixed. She feels his gaze but in a good way. Well, well, well. This is going to be interesting. I’ve never seen Xav take a backward step with any woman. Normally, he’s all over them and in their face. Alesha’s different, though. He doesn’t know how to approach her. Wait until I tell Nat, later. She’s going to die.

  I don’t know enough about Alesha to judge what’s going on. She seems the quietest of the family. Lilly’s name has come up many times in stories when Emily told me how her and Zach finally got together. Xavier is a player, so I’m not sure she would ever be right for him. I need to talk to Emily later. I may have to save that poor girl from being conquered by the self-proclaimed king of the opposite sex. His ego’s huge but in the funniest of ways. I would be lost without him, but I would never want to date him. Not in a million years.

  A hand on my shoulder drags me back to the present.

  “Can you take a little walk with me, dear?” Grant’s mom links her arm in mine. My stomach sinks. Why does she want to talk to me? Is she going to tell me to stay away from Grant and stop hurting him? Moms can be very protective if someone is hurting their babies. Honestly, I know, I would be like that, too.

  “Sure, where did you want to go?” I mumble through nerves.

  “Not far. Let’s grab a drink and sit in a booth for a little while and chat. I haven’t had a chance to get to know you. My kids are so noisy, so I thought it would be quieter over here.” I was going anyway but Sophia makes sure. She walks me to the bar and orders a drink.

  “Just a sparkling water for me, please. I can’t have too much alcohol at the moment. I only have three days left, then I am on the plane to New York. As scary as that is.”

  “Emily was explaining to me that you’re headed to an audition. That’s amazing. You’re such a talented woman. I bet your parents are so proud of you.”

  “Thank you, they are. I don’t get to see them as often as I would like but Mom checks in on me every day. She makes sure that I’m okay. It’s a habit she got into when I was badly injured. There were some dark days before I was back dancing. Family is everything when you really need someone.”

  “Family, friends, and the man you love, are your whole world. They will never let you down when you really need them.” She stares at me for a moment. “So, are you being honest with your mom when she calls every day? Are you saying I’m fine, or are you telling her you’re sitting here with a broken heart?”

  How do I even answer that?

  “Please, Sophia, I can’t answer that. Not here,” I whisper.

  “Sweetie, I’m not here to upset you. The total opposite. I just want to tell you we are here if you need us. Timing in life is not always perfect. That doesn’t change that you and Grant are meant to be. It may not happen now. When the universe is ready, you will be together. That, I can guarantee. Until then, you must stay strong and do what you need to do. You have both made the ultimate sacrifice of your happiness so don’t waste the time.”

  “How can you be so sure? I have pushed him away and I want him to move on. He deserves to be happy. He deserves love and someone who is going to always put him first. I haven’t done that. I am being so selfish with my own dream.” My breathing gets faster, and the tears threaten to spill. “One I am not sure I even want anymore.”

  “Beautiful girl, don’t ever say that. Dreams are what keep us alive. They keep us company when we’re lonely and give us the greatest happiness when we reach them. What you need to remember is that along the way there’s hard work, tears and heartache. We grow from that. We get stronger and it helps us make it to the end.”

  I can’t comment otherwise the tears will start and I can’t do that here.

  “Can I tell you a story, Zara?”

  I just nod, that’s all I can manage.

  “When Grant was a little boy, he didn’t talk much. He was the quiet, brooding type.” This makes me giggle. I can just picture it.

  Sophia smiles at my giggle. “Yes, yes, I know it’s hard to imagine, isn’t it? My children are all different. Luke, I couldn’t shut up or keep still, but that’s a whole different story.”

  “As Grant grew into a man, he decided he would take on the role of protector of his brothers and sisters. As parents, we look at him with pride and so much love. We know if anything were to happen to Mitch and me, he would make sure everyone is okay. Maybe not so much on an emotional level but definitely on every other level. The only problem with this is, he has locked away his emotions. He thinks he needs to be strong for everyone else. Never lose focus. That’s why he lied to me today and told me he was sick and had to leave. He wouldn’t want anyone to see him struggling.”

  “He’s not sick.” I look down at my knees, embarrassed.

  “That is where you are wrong. He is sick. Very sick. He is lovesick for you, my dear girl. What he’s doing is the same as what he does in this family. He will do whatever is needed to make us happy with little fuss and sometimes a bit of grumpiness. He’s doing that for you. He’s putting your happiness above anything he wants or needs for himself. I have never seen him do this for anyone except family. The rest of the world he’d tell to get fucked and move on. But not family. And as far as I’m concerned, you’re now part of my family. If Grant has brought you into his circle, then he is never letting you go.”

  “But that is why I have to leave. It’s not fair he has to do that. No man should have to be miserable so I can be happy. That’s just not fair. That makes me an awful bitch, pardon my French.” Sophia smiles at me like she knows something I don’t.

  “You’re right, but that’s what Stevenson men do. Like father, like son.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Sophia looks across at Mitch, eyes full of love. Their marriage looks as strong as steel and she still looks at him like he’s the reason the sun rises every single day.

  “Zara, I’m going to tell you a secret that I haven’t told any of my children. Not that I don’t want to. I haven’t needed to relive that time until now. Now is the time to share something that will help you, I hope.” She pauses again while looking at Mitch with respect and love.

  “When I first met Mitch, I was working in a coffee shop. I looked up from the cash register to take an order and I nearly passed out. The most handsome, strong, good-looking man I had ever seen was standing in line waiting to order. He was dressed in workman’s clothes and stared at his feet the whole time. He didn’t look like he fit in there. I tried to keep my nerves in check but when it came to ordering, he was the more nervous.

  “We got through the first meeting and we started going on a few dates. At the time I was training to become a singer and perform in musical theatre. I’d done a few shows in my local town but nothing major. I loved to sing and dance. That was what made me happy.

  “I had this dream as a little girl that one day I would sing on stage. Back then no one had money for lessons or to go to schools to train. So, by the time I met Mitch, I was trying to reach my dream on my own, through hard work and determination. Not long after we met, I was offered a role in the musical My Fair Lady. It was in a big city called Hazelton and was three hours from where we lived. I didn’t know what to do. My dream was finally coming true and here was this hot guy who I didn’t want to leave. I cried and agonized for a few days on my decision. I hadn’t even told him I could sing.

  “On the second day, he demanded to know what was wrong and what was upsetting me. I broke down and told him. I had to tell him everything. About my dreams, the whole lot. That was the day I knew I would marry that man.

  “He told me I was to pack my bags and head to Hazelton the next day on the train. My dream was just as important to him as it was to me. We argued for a bit and then he found a very nice way to shut me up, if you get my drift.” Sophia winks at me and smiles brightly. She’s right back there in that m
emory and feeling every part of it.

  “If there’s one thing I know about my Stevenson men. When they love, they love hard. I can see in your eyes, you’ve already experienced that, haven’t you?”

  There’s no point lying, she can already see it. “Yes.” My cheeks feel like they’re on fire from all the blushing. How do you admit to someone’s mother you had sex with their son? Lordy.

  “Oh, sweetie, don’t be embarrassed. I can tell you some hot stories!”

  “No, please. Let’s just leave that part of the story out.” I’m sure Grant would die if he knew what his mom’s saying.

  “Let’s just say there wasn’t much sleep that night. The next morning, Mitch dropped me to the train station before he left for work. He told me to strive for my dream and he would be here waiting for me when I was finished. I remember trying to say to him through my tears that I couldn’t ask him to do that. In that low growl I was told it wasn’t my choice. He wrote me a letter every single day, Zara. Every day without fail. He never once asked me to come home. He never asked me to stop living my dream. He told me how much he missed me. He showed me when he’d come and see me on weekends. His last words in every letter were, ‘I am patient and will wait for you, even if the wait is for eternity. When you’re ready, come home to me’. It made me cry every single time.”

  Now I’m crying. Looking across at Mitch, I now know where Grant gets it from.

  “Sophia, why have you never told the kids this? That’s the most beautiful story. Mitch is a special man.”

  “Sometimes, sweetie, things need to wait until there’s a right time for them to be revealed. If I’d told my children that story years ago, it would never have meant as much as it does now, to you. You are the person that needs it, not that rowdy bunch over there. Don’t worry, there are plenty more stories stored up for them when the time is right.”

  “That man standing over there is a domineering, hot-as-hell alpha male. Hiding underneath it all is the most amazing, soft man who loves me with every single cell in his body. I think we both know another man like that. You’re the only person to ever see that soft side. Thank God that side has finally seen the light of day. I prayed every day for you, my sweet girl. That first night at the hospital, I told him to marry you. I knew you were the one.”