Beth raised her eyebrows, thoroughly enjoying the sight of William improvising. "You entertain male company here?"
William looked down, smiling in an embarrassed sort of way. "No…..that's not what I -"
"William," Beth said quietly, "It's bad enough that you had to come pick me up today. Then you felt obligated to let me stay here. I can't take your room. I already feel awful about all this."
William took a step closer, shoved his hands in his pockets, and smiled wryly down at her.
"First of all, I didn't have to come pick you up. I volunteered. Second, the invitation to stay with us was in no way obligatory."
"You volunteered for chauffer duty because no one else did," Beth remarked. "Everyone was caught up in the cake catastrophe, I'm sure."
"Beth," William began, "there was no cake catastrophe." When Beth didn't respond, he continued. "It seemed like a good excuse. Things like that always go wrong just before a wedding."
Beth felt speechless, her chest rising and falling deeper with each breath. In other words, he had escorted her from the airport simply because he wanted to. "What about the Bradfords' guest wing?"
"That one was valid. I'll have to thank Les's mom later."
Beth gazed into William's dark chocolate eyes, daring to sense forgiveness and understanding, even regret for how they had parted. No matter what had been said or done, or unsaid or undone, he was standing there in front of her. She was with him, at his request and by his design. And at this moment, there didn't seem to be much standing between them. Beth was jolted out of her thoughts by the shrill ring of her cell phone.
She fished in her pocket as William turned toward the bathroom. As she answered the call, William began pulling towels out of the cupboard and setting them on the counter.
"Hey, dad…...Yeah, I made it. Sorry, I should've called…….It was long - I'm not sure I'll ever eat peanuts again…….Yeah, I'm pretty tired. I'm turning in here in a minute…….Well, we're two hours ahead of you..….Okay, I will……Love you too." She snapped her phone shut and sighed, feeling like Cinderella. The clock had struck twelve and the sparkling night magic had evaporated.
"There are towels in the bathroom and the bedding's all clean," William informed her.
Beth almost reminded him that she had slept in his sheets before. Instead she just nodded thankfully.
"Do you need anything else?" He stood across the room in the doorway, leaning in.
Beth was struck by the absurdity of it all. Hadn't this very scene played out months ago when she and Jenna had slept over at Les's? Only she was quite sure there would be no good night kiss tonight.
Realizing she hadn't answered, she said hastily, "You're not sleeping on the couch are you?"
"See, the thing is we really do have a guestroom. I'll be staying in there."
"William, I really don't mind -"
"Let it go, woman. Geez. Get some sleep." He turned and walked out of the room with a smirk on his face.
Beth stepped to the doorway. "William?" He turned on the spot. "I just wanted to…..thank you for…..everything." Beth paused and as she looked into his eyes she blurted, "It's good to see you again."
William's countenance changed, and Beth felt the blood rise to the surface of her skin. She caught her bottom lip between her teeth and looked down. "Um, see you in the morning, then."
"Sweet dreams," William said, then closed the door behind him.
Beth slumped against it, wondering what tomorrow would bring.
ALTERED
"But people themselves alter so much, that there is something new to be observed in them forever."
~Elizabeth Bennet, Pride & Prejudice
Beth woke early, feeling groggy, every part of her screaming to be left in bed all day. She pulled William's sheets up to her face, trying to find his scent behind the fabric softener, morbidly wishing he hadn't put fresh ones on. Burying her face in his pillow, she struck out a second time. Then she pulled the flannel blanket up over the sheets and breathed deep. The scent was very faint, but it was William.
What would he think if he came in to find her sniffing his sheets? Beth sat up like she had been bitten. Reaching for her phone, she flipped it open to check the time. You had to love modern technology. Her phone had switched to Eastern Standard Time automatically.
It was seven thirty, and she was supposed to meet Jenna at the dress shop at nine. She heaved herself out of bed with a profound groan.
After showering quickly, she dressed in a long denim skirt and cap sleeve t-shirt. She scrunched gel into her hair and blew it dry, wondering if William had had a hard time recognizing her at the airport yesterday with shorter hair. After brushing on some mascara and lip gloss she took a deep breath before wrenching the bedroom door open and venturing into the hall. Afraid of finding herself in a no-trespassing zone, she retraced her steps from the previous night, heading toward the kitchen.
Gianna stood at the stove, looking up when Beth came in. "Hey! How did you sleep?"
"You mean in the 'guestroom?'" Beth rolled her eyes.
Gianna laughed. "Well, just so you know, I did redecorate the guestroom - William slept in a room with two red walls and two black walls, and no flannel or plaid anywhere."
"What agony," Beth mocked. "You know he can't get along without his flannel." She colored. Did Gianna know the significance of William's blanket? It wasn't likely - it didn't seem like the kind of detail a guy would share with his sister, or anyone for that matter. "So, what are you making?"
Gianna sighed. "Crepes. I mean I'm trying to make crepes. I can never get the lumps out."
"So, you like to cook?" Beth asked tentatively.
"Well, it's…..sort of a new hobby. I've kind of become obsessed with trying new recipes since -" she stopped short, leaving her sentence unfinished.
"Since William came home," Beth supplied shrewdly. "I'm sure he's benefited from your adventures in the kitchen." She leaned over Gianna, studying the recipe on the cookbook page. "So, I think your lumps will disappear if you sift the flour and whisk as you sift, instead of dumping it in all at once."
Gianna stared as though she had just bumped into her favorite movie star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Beth eyed her sideways, smiling. Then she busied herself with sifting the flour.
"I think a new hobby is a great way to make a new start. Redirect. Mine is homework. I aced all my classes last semester and got accepted into my pre-grad program for next year."
"And that worked for you?" Gianna watched Beth with wide eyes while she whisked. "That helped you 'redirect?' Made everything go back to the way it was before?" She raised her eyebrows as she waited for Beth's response.
"Sometimes things can't go back - people can't go back. Sometimes circumstances alter you, and there's no going back." She sighed. "But it helped some."
The girls sifted and whisked in silence until Gianna caught William peeking in around the door frame and pulled him in.
"There's the best brother in the whole world! Come help us make breakfast."
After the crepes were baked, filled with strawberries, and topped with whipped cream and powdered sugar, the three took everything to the kitchen table. Forks scraped against plates as the crepes were devoured and second helpings were consumed.
"You're getting pretty good, Gi. Soon you'll have your own cooking show," William complimented, wiping his mouth with a napkin.
"Beth helped. She taught me how to conquer the lumps."
"Anytime you have flour issues, let me know."
"Beth is very talented with flour," William inserted craftily. "She's particularly good at caking your hair with it." He watched her as he drained his glass of its last remnants of orange juice.
What did he mean by bringing that up now? That was their first official date - and their last. Beth couldn't think of it without a bittersweet tang filling her mouth. Apparently it didn't bother him the same way. Beth smiled uncomfortably, digging her phone out of her pocket to check the time without meeting Willi
am's eyes.
"Yeesh, I need to get going! It's quarter to nine." She shot up from the table, scooting her chair in and rushing her dishes to the sink. William met her before she made it to the sink, taking the dishes out of her hands and setting them on the counter.
"Do you have the address of the shop?"
"Yes," Beth answered slowly, confused. She pulled a paper with faded pencil out of her pocket and read aloud, "Twenty-eight west twelfth street."
"Okay. Give me ten minutes to shower and I'll drive you."
"What?! No. No way. I'm taking a cab."
"You're taking a cab?" William taunted. "Okay, show me how you call a cab. This should be good."
"What do you mean, 'show you?' You just whistle or something."
He shrugged. "Let's hear your whistle, then."
Beth hesitated before pursing her lips and blowing, creating more of a wheeze than a whistle.
"Pathetic. You're going to have to do better, Beth. We natives can be pretty ruthless. With a whistle like that you've got a better chance of getting a cab with your looks."
Beth's mouth fell open in astonishment, a hint of delirious laughter on her lips.
"So, thanks to you, I now only have nine minutes to shower. Gi," turning to his sister, "you're on hostage duty. Don't let her out of your sight. Who knows what could happen to this poor, innocent, naive girl on the streets of New York." He winked at Beth and headed for the shower.
True to his word, William delivered Beth to the bridal shop Blush and Bashful right on time. Once inside, he plopped on the couch with a wave of his hand as Jenna whisked Beth off to the dressing room. One of the consultants had delivered the dress and stepped out to answer a phone call, and Jenna took the liberty of helping Beth into it. As she zipped the dress, Jenna watched Beth's face in the mirror that faced them.
"So, how was last night?" she asked in a casual, if hopeful, tone.
Beth's eye caught Jenna's in the mirror, reproaching her. "Gianna and I made crepes this morning."
Jenna deflated. "Oh, that's great. She seems really sweet."
"She's amazing, Jenna. She's been through so much but she's still so strong and trusting. I think if I would've known her…..before…..I would've understood William better."
"And what about William? Did you guys talk?"
"Sure, we talked."
"About what happened," Jenna clarified, losing a touch of patience. "About what's going to happen now."
"Jenna, let's be realistic," Beth said, turning to face her. Having a confrontation with a mirror image was unnerving. "It doesn't matter anymore. William lives here in New York, with Gianna. I'm going away to a new school in the fall. It's all 'water under the bridge' and all that. No amount of being thrown together over a weekend is going to change the things that were said and done. We're in a good place. We can tolerate each other without too much discomfort."
But Beth remembered William's confession about picking her up and bringing her home with him. None of that spelled toleration. Tears burned her eyes on their way to the surface. Why did it have to happen now, in front of Jenna? The last thing she wanted to do was take away from her best friend's joy. She had to pull it together.
Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she smiled at Jenna. "I love you, and I'm so happy for you. That's all that matters right now." She looked down at her dress, smoothing the silky fabric. "So, what happens now? They make a human voodoo doll out of me?"
"Yeah. I'll go get the seamstress. Actually, you just come out front and they do all the adjustments there. Then we leave the dress here for the alterations and pick it up later."
"Great. Let's go." Beth walked out of the dressing room with Jenna trailing behind.
~:~
William sat sprawled on the fuzzy pink couch of Blush and Bashful, which sat in front of the sheer pink curtains that sheathed the windows, which hung above the plush pink carpet on the floor. He twitched toward the door. He could almost feel his testosterone drying up. Aside from feeling like he was in a cave of Pepto Bismol, he wasn't sure Beth would be comfortable trying on a dress in front of him, anyway.
He had just decided to go lose himself in the surrounding shops until she was done, when Beth came out of the dressing room, swathed in a dark purple dress. It seemed to fit her loosely, but her curves were by no means hidden. The strapless style of the dress drew his eyes to her slender neck and shoulders. He was relieved that there was no red punch in the scenario this time.
She stepped up on a carpeted platform and one of the shop ladies bustled up to her, measuring tape and pins in hand. William sat back down, propping one elbow up on the arm of the couch resting his mouth against the ball of his fist. His brows pulled into a contemplative scowl as he watched Beth.
Why was it so hard to tell her how he felt? He had seen her reaction last night when he touched her hand at the Bradfords'. He didn't know if quickened breathing was a good or a bad sign, but his touch had affected her in some way. And she had told him it was good to see him. Not 'I hate you'….. not, 'I'd rather die than look at you.' If she only knew how long it had taken him to fall asleep last night, and how many times he had found himself standing outside her room, wanting to break the allegorical ice. Her protective gesture on Gianna's behalf at the Bradfords' had cracked his heart open afresh. Where there had been merely a fault line before, now there was a continental divide.
But what was there to tell her, really? He loved her. He still wanted her. She had still been with Jaxon. He had still said horrible things to her, and didn't deserve forgiveness. No matter how he felt, the facts hadn't changed.
Beth pivoted back and forth as she was told by the seamstress, only glancing at William briefly once or twice. How could he make this right? He was mulling the question over when Jenna sat down beside him.
"Hey, you. How's the blushing bride?" He put his arm around her and squeezed her shoulders. Beth looked up at them, her eyes reduced to suspicious slits.
Jenna smiled at her friend, a glassy, painted smile that William had never seen on her face before. "I have a little problem, William. I'm hoping you can help me."
William regarded her with concern. "What's up?"
Jenna stole a glance at Beth, who watched them unabashedly with wide, dark eyes. "Let's go for a walk," Jenna suggested to William. Then she called out to Beth that they would be right back. "She's got at least a dozen pins sticking in her - she won't be able to stop me," Jenna muttered as she towed William from the shop.
Once they had cleared the storefront Jenna began, adopting the tone of a patient adult speaking to a child.
"William, tomorrow is my wedding day. And a bride should be happy on her wedding day, right?"
William was suddenly frightened. Jenna's speech had a definite cold feet feel to it. He nodded, concerned.
"The problem is that my best friend is miserable. And, being one soul in two bodies as we are, I cannot be truly happy when she is not. Especially when you have the power to change that."
William plunged his hands into his pockets, sighing deeply. He should have known.
"Jenna, what do I do? I'm trying to show her how I feel, but she keeps pushing me away. In all honesty I don't think she can forgive me for the things I said to her the night I left." He paused, then added severely, "And she shouldn't."
Jenna rounded on him, planting herself in his way. "And what about you forgiving her? You're still holding this Jaxon thing over her!"
"Jenna, you have to admit. It's just a little bit of a deterrent. He's the father of my sister's baby. He messed her up, probably forever. She'll never be the same. Do you have any idea how excruciating it is to picture Beth with that jerk? To think of his hands on her?" William stopped abruptly, feeling queasy.
"If it's so hard to picture, then why did you leave her to him?"
William felt like he'd just been slapped.
"You have no idea what you're talking about," she scolded. "Let me tell you something. The night she was with Jaxon, sh
e came home upset. Do you remember? It was the night those guys brought Lindy home drunk."
"I remember." William tried to forget the image he'd conjured of Beth in Jaxon's arms so many times - and focus on Jenna instead.
"And after you dealt with them you went after Beth?"
William nodded with clenched teeth.
"It was a few days before I could get out of Beth why she'd been upset that night. Turns out, when Jaxon kissed her she didn't feel anything……until your face popped in her head. Both times." Jenna smiled triumphantly. "She didn't know why. But then you hugged her and it happened again. She told me that it felt……right…..to be there with you like that. Like déjà vu. And, of course, that just made her mad. You know Beth."
William listened intently, not trusting himself to speak.
Jenna took his arm, walking again. "She didn't see Jaxon again after that night, William."
"What do you mean she never saw him after that night?"
"I mean she refused to even talk to him after you left. She didn't even know why. All she had to go on was what you told her. She trusted you enough to know that she should stay away from him, even though you left her without the whole story. Not to mention she kind of secretly blamed Jaxon for losing you. He kept texting and calling, but she wouldn't talk to him."
William watched Jenna, not daring to believe her. When he spoke his words were slowly expressed, carefully constructed. "So you're telling me that the only thing keeping us apart is me thinking she can't forgive me, and her thinking I can't forgive her?"
Jenna smiled, turning back toward the shop. "Now you know. You'd better make good use of the information. She would kill me if she knew what I just told you."
And with that, Jenna checked her watch and began backing down the sidewalk. "I'm meeting Les at Macys to do our gift registry. Can you handle Beth?"
The meaning behind her words was implied. Can I trust you to quit being a schmuck and go take care of this? He nodded.
"Good," Jenna said. "We'll see you at lunch."
When William pushed back through the door of the chasm of pink, he caught his breath. Beth stood on a carpet pedestal surrounded by mirrors, looking like a goddess plucked from her pantheon. The seamstress had disappeared and Beth stood facing the mirror, her back to William. She hadn't noticed him come back into the shop. As she turned back and forth, looking at the dress from different angles, William noted that it was more form-fitting now that it had been pinned. He watched her from behind, humbled by her beauty and his recently acquired intelligence. She drew her hair up into her hands, and William guessed that she was trying to decide whether to wear it up or down at the wedding. Awe settled over him as he watched her, appreciating the graceful curve of her neck and shoulders - something he hadn't noticed when she'd had long hair.
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