“Morning,” I waved as I walked by.
She didn't speak, just waved and continued to watch us.
We went through the motions of a workout, but really, we just fooled around. We worked hard all the time, so having a light day was exactly what we needed. Plus, after last night, I couldn't do serious today. I wanted to get done so I could shower and get ready for lunch. I turned the shower on and stepped in, making sure I shaped my beard up a little and washing my hair better than I usually did. I wanted her to see me the way she should and not like the caveman I usually looked like. It was only the second time in my life that I wanted to look good for someone else. Weird.
Chapter Sixteen
Emerson
I pulled my hair up and walked next door. His door was open, so I walked in and found some pasta salad on the counter. There was some bread and a couple jars of condiments sitting beside it.
“I wasn't expecting you so soon,” Luke said as he walked into the room hair still wet and shirtless. His beard had been trimmed. I wanted to walk over, push him against a wall and kiss him, but I knew that I couldn't or shouldn't.
“Sorry, I was done with what I was working on, so I just walked over. The door was open.” I pointed over my shoulder toward the door.
“It's fine,” he smiled at me. “You’re always welcome to come in when you want. Let me just go grab a shirt.” He turned and walked out of the room leaving me standing there wishing he wouldn’t go get a shirt.
I busied myself fixing sandwiches. I was almost done when he reappeared in a baseball style t-shirt with black sleeves that clung to his arms while the gray material stretched over his broad chest. I had known he was built, but feeling him against me the night before had made it even more vivid in my head.
“I made you a sandwich,” I said turning back to the counter and picking up his plate. “I hope you like mustard.” I turned back around quickly and ran into his chest the plate and sandwich falling to the floor.
“Crap,” I sighed.
“It's fine, Emmy.” He reached for me, but I stepped back.
“Please,” I begged for a little space. I needed to get my thoughts together before I started talking. I leaned down and cleaned up the sandwich. I wanted to say so many things. Things that I knew wouldn't matter to anyone but me, but things that needed to be said.
“Emerson?” He looked down at me. I stood slowly and walked over to the trash can, dropping the sandwich into the empty container.
I looked up at him, and the concern on his face was obvious. He reached out for my hand, and I let him take it. He pulled my hand up to his mouth and placed a soft kiss over my knuckles.
“I don't even know where to begin.” I started. He continued to hold my hand, squeezing it tightly.
“Well, before you begin, I want you to know I like you. I want that to be clear,” he looked into my eyes pleading with me to continue.
“I just don't know if this was the right thing to do. I won't be here forever. My future isn't here.” I shrugged. I didn't know what else to say.
“So, you are giving up before anything even starts?”
“I don't know what I’m doing. I think Ryan showing up kept us from making a big mistake.” His hand let go of mine, and I let it fall to my side. He didn't look happy, but I can't say that he looked sad either. He just looked at me, into my soul. I wasn't sure how I felt about it, but I knew the connection was real. I didn't even know why I was standing here telling him ‘no’ when I knew that ‘yes’ was the right answer. What would happen when I moved to Portland? I wouldn't have time for a long-distance relationship, and he wouldn't move with me. At least, I didn’t think he would. Luke was not a city boy by any standard.
I was just so confused. I hadn't moved here to find a man; I was completely fine by myself, and then he had to go and kiss me last night. My world had tilted on its axis when his lips touched mine, but there was no way that would continue. I couldn't take that chance. I knew he had the power to shatter my heart, and I also knew he was my neighbor for the rest of the year, so a fall out would be horrible.
“Will you look at me?” he asked softly.
I tilted my head up and found his eyes. Gorgeous, blue-gray eyes. Soft around the edges.
“Get out of your own head, Emmy.” He smiled. “We can tear this apart, or we can just see where it goes. I'll admit that things happened kinda fast last night, but there is nothing anyone could give me to make me change it.”
“I just...” he put his finger over my lips to stop my words.
“Let's just have some lunch and go back to the way things were when you were standing next to me, watching shooting stars. I can accept that I might have rushed you, but I won't accept that it isn't right.”
I nodded, letting his words wash over me. He smiled and reached for the second sandwich that was on a plate. “Go sit, and let's eat some lunch.”
“But your sandwich,” I turned back to start making him another.
“I can make it, sit.” He pointed to the table and then steered the conversation away from anything that involved us and his lips on mine. We talked about my work and about his schedule over the next few months. He made me promise to come to the competition in Portland since it would be the closest.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked. His voice pulled me out of my thoughts.
“That would actually be perfect. My grandfather asked me several months ago to keep the office under control while he went on vacation. I will assume that they are still going after all that has happened. I’ll call Mimi later and make sure.” I was rambling.
“Good. I’d like for you to see what we do and how we compete. It's only fair since you have to put up with all the noise.” He smiled and then stood, walking over to the sink.
“Thank you for lunch.” I stood and walked toward the door putting the bar in between us.
“Anytime.” he nodded then looked back down at the sink. I stood there for a few seconds thinking that he would say something else, really kind of hoping he would, but he didn't. He picked up stuff off the counter and started toward the fridge.
“See ya later.” I said before rushing out the door. I hurried over to my door and walked in grabbing my backpack and headed out into the woods. I need some quiet to really think about everything. I knew my reaction had been knee jerk, but I also knew my record with men. They always said they could handle someone who was independent, but in reality, they never could. There were so many things I liked about Luke, but there were also things I saw as issues. Maybe it was just me, maybe I needed to get used to accepting help from someone without strings attached. He mowed the lawn, and he always took care of the outside of the house. He helped me with my bags, or anything else he ever noticed I might need help with. I had to clear my head.
I walked out into the woods and found my meadow, spread out my small blanket, and laid down, looking up at the cloudy sky.
When I checked the forecast that morning, it said the rain was supposed to start around four. But as my luck would have it, it started not long after I had really got settled. I was writing in my notebook when I felt the first drop. I packed up my stuff and started the walk home. By the time I reached the house, I was drenched to the bone. Luckily because I knew how the pacific northwest was, I always carried a bag with me.
I stripped my clothes off and walked up the stairs. I decided to soak in the tub instead of taking my normal quick shower. I needed it after the week I’d had.
Chapter Seventeen
Luke
I didn't regret it, and I would do it again. I wanted to do it again. I wanted my lips on hers. I watched her walk into the woods and thought about following her but thought better of it. I spent the rest of the day piddling around the shop, not really wanting to work on my project because I was so distracted. I gave up and drove into town to see if Ryan needed any help at the office since he was there on a Sunday.
“Hey, what are you doing here?”
“Tha
t seems to be a common question lately.” I laughed and walked over to the desk. “You need some help?”
“Sure, yeah.” He handed me a list of stuff that his father had left for him.
I walked around and spent the next several hours doing inventory.
“Let’s grab some food.” Ryan walked up next to me.
“Okay.”
“Should I call Emmy and see if she wants to join?” he asked.
I wanted to say yes, but I knew we both needed a little space, especially after today.
“She was in the woods when I left. I would assume she’s still there.”
“She better head back soon if she wants to stay dry.”
The rain started to fall just as we sat down in the diner downtown.
“What can I get for you boys?” Ethel asked.
“Hey Ethel, how’s today been?” I asked as she sat down in the seat beside me.
“Well, since you two young men walked in, it got a little brighter,” she smiled at me then over at Ryan.
“You want the usual, Ranie-boy?”
“Absolutely. You know me so well,” Ryan chimed.
“You have ordered the same sandwich for fifteen years. Don't give me that much credit.”
“And you, Lukie-poo?”
“BLT and fries?” I said.
“Is that a question or an order?”
“Order.” I laughed and leaned over and kissed her cheek.
“You always know how to make an old lady feel special.”
“Who’s old?” Ryan asked.
“You are just as sweet as pie. It's good to see you boys in here. You started competing?”
“Last weekend,” I told her.
“Well, good luck. Maybe this will be the year,” she smiled.
“Let's hope so. I don't know how many more I have in me.” I winked at her, and she turned, taking the ticket to the kitchen. The diner wasn't packed, which was weird for the time of day. Must have been the threat of rain. The town was getting older, and so were we, and most of the people in town stayed home when it rained like it was supposed to today.
Ethel walked back over and sat down our drinks before disappearing to another table. She was kind to everyone, but we were the only ones in town that had special nicknames. She had called me Lukie-poo since I was ten years old, and while I didn't appreciate it then, I did now.
Ryan and I chatted over our meal about the next several trips, and every time he tried to steer the conversation toward Emerson, I diverted.
“What the hell is going on?” he stopped me when I was talking about the Portland trip.
“What do you mean?”
“You refuse to talk about Emmy?”
“Why would we be talking about Emmy—Emerson.” I corrected not so smoothly.
“You had your tongue down her throat last night, and now you won't talk about her? I remember when you dated Leslie a hundred years ago. You talked about her nonstop for months.”
“I just don't want to talk about her, okay?”
“What happened? Something had to have happened.” He glared at me.
“We just decided that maybe it was best if we slowed things down.”
“Why? That's stupid.”
“I didn't say I liked it, but I agreed with her.”
“So you didn't want to slow things down?” he asked.
“No, not really.”
“So?”
“I'm not going to push her, Ryan. She has a lot on her plate, and I shouldn't have kissed her.”
“Wait. That was the first time you've kissed her?”
“Yeah.” I nodded
“Holy shit!” he said loudly.
“Ryan.”
“I mean holy shit,” he whispered.
“It just happened.”
“You had her pinned up on the counter half naked after one kiss! Dude, I need some secrets.”
I shook my head not really knowing if I should even be talking about this with him. “No secrets, it just kind of happened.”
“I hate I even came over, you guys would be married by now if I hadn't interrupted. I need to go talk to her.”
“You need to NOT go do that.”
“Why? She was my friend before she was your girlfriend.”
“She isn't my girlfriend.”
“Sure, she’s not.”
“She isn't,” I stated.
“So, you make out with her, second base, might I add. And then she gets all cold. What the hell did you do to cause that?”
“I pushed her, and I shouldn't have.”
“You regret it?”
“Nope, not even a little.” I couldn't help but smile at the thought of her in my arms.
“Well, once I talk to her, I'll give you the wedding date.”
“Oh my god, would you just leave it alone for now? She is going to come to the competition in Portland end of the month. Can we just be friendly until then?”
“Sure, if that's what you want. I just don't see the harm in chatting with her, maybe picking her brain.”
“You can talk to her all you want, but I would prefer that you didn't talk about me,” I explained.
He threw his hands up in unenthusiastic defeat, and I steered the conversation away from Emerson and back to the competition coming up.
I hopped in my truck and drove back out to the house. Emerson was on the porch when I pulled in, so I waved, smiled, and then walked into the house. I wanted to talk to her and I had mail in the truck, but I didn't want to talk to her at that moment. I just wanted to get in the house and try and get some sleep.
Chapter Eighteen
Emerson
Luke had been friendly but distant. I wasn't sure if he was upset with me or if he was just trying to give me the space I had asked for. I hadn't intended to not talk to him but more just not kiss him anymore.
“Emmy!” Ryan ran up and grabbed me and twirled me around in a hug. I hadn't really talked to him since he interrupted us the other night. I wasn’t sure exactly how much he knew, but considering how close he and Luke were, I just assumed he knew everything.
“Hey!” I laughed as he continued to spin us.
“You gonna run with us this morning?”
“No, I have a report I have to submit in the next few days. So, I really need to work on it.”
“Well drink up and get to work.” He smacked me on the back as I walked away.
I laughed, grabbed my coffee cup, and disappeared into the house.
***
My phone rang a few minutes after noon, and I reached for it.
“Hello?”
“Emmy?”
“Rachel?”
“Yes! I lost my phone and all of my contacts were in it. You have been avoiding social media obviously because you haven't answered any of my messages from last night!”
“You sent me messages?”
“Umm. YES! I have some awesome news! And I want to tell EVERYONE, but I wanted to tell you first!”
“Yeah?” I said, even though I already knew what the news was.
“Charles and I are getting married.”
“Yay! That's amazing. I'm so happy for you.”
“I'm over the moon.”
“I bet you are,” I proclaimed.
“So, how are things out there? Have you told the hot neighbor you’re into him?”
“Really? You just got engaged and this is what you want to talk about?”
“Are you at least getting laid?”
“What? No.”
“Well, you should be. Don't waste that gorgeous body.”
I laughed. “Shut up. Now, when are you coming out to visit?” I asked.
“I have a week off coming up, and I would love to fly out and see you for at least a few days.”
“That would be amazing! There is a lot of testosterone out here and not enough estrogen.”
“Awww, you do miss me?” she cooed.
“You know I do!”
“Well, we shall re
medy said affliction. By the way, do you know how many people I called before I thought about getting your number from Charlie’s phone?”
“You crack me up.” I laughed into the phone.
“It’s my job. Okay, I have to call like my mom and stuff,” she laughed. “I'll call you later this week and give you the details of when I can come out.”
“Awesome! We can stay in Portland for the day and see everyone. Granddad says you’re always welcome there.”
“Aww, I love that man. Is he okay now?”
“As crazy as ever. He wanted out of the hospital the day after.”
“Yup, that sounds about right. Tell them I said hi when you get a chance.”
“I will. Hey, I'm sorry I haven’t called much.”
“Girl, please. I know how you are when you get a new grant. There were weeks when we lived together that you didn't speak to me. I miss you though.”
“I miss you too. Love you, talk to you soon.”
“Love you too, bye.”
And she was gone. I was a shitty friend, but at least she knew me and my quirks. This was another reason why I never dated. There would be times where I was so focused on work that I didn't pay attention to anything else around me, and while that hadn't necessarily been the case, I was going to let it be at least for now. She would understand when she got here and saw my neighbors.
***
I worked more than usual over the next two weeks, and I avoided Luke as much as possible. We were always friendly and talked a little here and there, but he kept his distance and so did I.
When Friday rolled around, I drove to Portland and picked up Rachel. We spent the weekend with my family, and then I brought her back to the house Sunday. We stayed up until midnight watching Harry Potter and drinking wine then crashed.
When she heard the yelling and chopping the next morning at seven a.m., she stumbled out of bed and shouted at me, scaring me half-senseless.
“You lying bitch!” she pointed at me.
“What?”
“You have two of the hottest men ever, shirtless and sweaty chopping wood in your backyard.”
“Yeah, and?”
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